26. Chapter 25
Chapter 25
A nother week passed, and his app told him the baby was the size of a prune. Ramiro wasn’t sure whether that was the most fitting description, or the worst one.
Some mornings, Summer woke him with her lunge toward the bathroom. Others, he woke with her still resting in his arms. He preferred that, but he also had to be careful not to poke her with his morning wood. It went down easier when she was sick and he got to take care of her.
Ramiro wanted to have sex with her again, but he also worried he’d overwhelm her. He kept waiting for a sign that she wanted more, but it never came. While Summer was closer to him than ever, it also felt like she was slipping through his fingers.
In the office, she switched to her secretary mode, with sunny smiles, a kind voice, and a giving mindset. Between coffee, lunch, and completed administrative tasks, Summer provided it all, and her smile looked less strained each time he thanked her.
Whenever he approached her desk, she minimized the window on her computer screen. Whatever she was researching made her expression fall, but she changed the subject when he tried to ask. Ramiro considered asking Hayes to send him her search history. If she hadn’t told him in the next week, he would.
At home, they’d taken to cuddling on the couch more often. Summer melted against his body each time, but she avoided looking at him.
Ramiro left the bathroom after getting ready for bed, not surprised to find the bedroom empty. He headed down the hallway, pausing to take her in.
She stood beside the bowl on the new stand, her fingers drifting along the edge, but she wasn’t looking at it. No, she kept glancing over at the bookcase where one of the cameras had been placed. Her mouth tightened at the edges, just like it had when she’d first learned about the cameras.
He crossed to where she stood, slipping his arms around her from behind and kissing her neck right under her ear. Summer tilted her head, giving him more access, tempting him to drive her out of her mind. He resisted the urge and kept his next kiss light.
His hand was above her stomach. He wanted to slide it down to test for a bump, even if he couldn’t see any difference in her body yet. Summer rarely touched herself there.
“What are you thinking about, baby girl?” he asked .
She leaned her head back against his chest. “It’s nothing.”
His sigh pushed against her hair as he looked toward the bookcase. “Is it the camera? You said you didn’t mind them, but something is bothering you about them. Tell me what it is.”
Her fingers moved to his, playing with them. “The cameras are fine.”
He turned her in his arms, tilting her chin up to search her eyes. They glistened in the moonlight in a way that made his stomach churn. “If they’re fine, why do you look like you’re gonna cry?”
She closed her eyes.
He brushed over her cheek with his thumb. “I can’t fix it if you don’t tell me.”
“There’s nothing to fix.” She turned her head, nuzzling against his hand. “I like that you look out for me. I even like the idea of you watching me.” She flushed, but her eyes still wouldn’t meet his.
“What don’t you like about them?” he asked.
She tried to pull away, but his hand moved into her hair, holding her still. Her teeth sank into her lip, and his mouth watered as the desire to replace her teeth with his own softer nibble tried to take over.
Her silence drew out, and he let it, enjoying the way her tension sparked in the air. He enjoyed soothing her normally, but this felt different. Better. Tempting.
She finally broke the silence with a sigh. “There’s nothing not to like. I just… didn’t realize. ”
Ramiro frowned, letting his fingers sift through her hair. Her eyelids lowered, her teeth pressing into that lower lip of hers again. He didn’t let the sight distract him, not yet.
“You saw Diego put them in.”
“I did, but these aren’t the first, are they? You had cameras in my apartment, didn’t you?”
Ramiro didn’t flinch from the truth. “I did. I needed to keep an eye on you.”
“I know, and I appreciate it. It’s not that I minded you watching. I’m not mad, Ramiro.”
“Not mad,” he agreed. He gently massaged her scalp, watching some of her tension leave her as she shivered. “But something about it makes you sad. I wish I understood why.”
Her eyes slid open to meet his. “It’s silly.”
“You can be silly with me.”
She pushed forward, hiding her face against his chest. His heart thudded at having her so close, but he waited for her. He’d always wait for her.
“I thought you just knew,” she mumbled.
He held her a little tighter to him, trying to decipher the words.
“I would give in and cry, and you would magically appear. Like it was meant to be.” She let out a huff that was more of a sob than a laugh. “I told you. It’s silly.”
“Meeting on that bridge was meant to be. I’ve always believed that.” Ramiro cupped her head, pulling her face back to look into her eyes again. “The rest of it? Me being there every time you cried? That was on purpose. That was me watching you every second I could because I needed to, more than anything.”
Summer blinked, but moisture gathered in her eyes faster than she could push it away. His thumb caught the first tear, rubbing the warmth of it into her skin.
“I needed to be there for you. I needed to wrap us together so tight, nothing could tear us apart.” He leaned down, kissing her tears away, his breath feathering over her skin. “It may not be magic, but it’s no less powerful, what I feel for you. I promise.”
“Ramiro,” she breathed.
Their lips were so close. He couldn’t wait for her to bridge the gap anymore. Her whimper from their mouths brushing together set his body on fire, but he kept the pressure light, gentle.
“If something tried to tear you away from me, I wouldn’t let it.” He kissed her again, but this time she returned his kiss. Her hands buried themselves in his hair, trying to keep him as close as she could, a small moan of protest leaving her when he pulled away enough to say, “I need you in my life, Summer. No matter what that looks like, I’ll always need you.”
“I want you to need me.”
Ramiro lifted her in his arms, his hands moving to cup her thighs as she wrapped her legs around him and dove in, her mouth and tongue showing him her own need.
He didn’t nibble and bite like he wanted. He stroked and brushed instead, letting the kiss extend without becoming more. Being this close to her, sharing the same breath, it became intimate in the way sex with her should have been. He craved more of it, and he took what he craved.
Summer loved kissing. Her lips were soft and demanding at the same time, her tongue giving, her breath minty but also filled with the sweetness that was just her. There was a connection between them, just like she’d said, and he gave himself over to the feeling. Losing himself in her kiss created an ache in his chest.
When they eventually parted enough to pant against each other’s damp lips, he stared into her hooded eyes, nudging her nose with his. “I love you, baby girl. I really do love you.”
She nodded, pressing forward so that their foreheads touched, their lips brushing. “I love you, too.”
He felt the words against his mouth and couldn’t resist kissing her again, focusing on the gentle press, the way their lips clung.
It was the best kiss of his life.
S ummer listened through the receiver but didn’t hear anything after her typical office greeting. “Hello?” she said. There was no dial tone or empty air. She heard someone breathing.
“You’ve reached Rodriguez Security,” she repeated, giving it another moment .
The click came, just like it had a few times over the past two weeks. They weren’t consistent, but the empty calls were adding up. Maybe it was Naz? She hadn’t seen him since he had been injured, but that was a few months ago now. Naz was never one to call—he didn’t like to talk—but if it was important, he might. It wouldn’t make sense for him not to stay on the line, though, or to do it repeatedly for two weeks.
Were prank calls still a thing?
She turned to her computer, making sure the windows about adoption were closed before locking the screen. Every time she researched adoption, she got overwhelmed. There were a ton of sites, most with words like ‘angel’ or ‘heart’ or ‘love’ along with ‘adoption.’ She hadn’t yet called any of the numbers. She couldn’t quite bring herself to do it.
Some sites had a form to fill out, which seemed cold somehow, like she didn’t even have to talk to someone to give away her baby. There were offers of counseling her through the decision, but would those counselors really be unbiased? Wouldn’t they want her to give up the baby? Of course, she wanted them to talk her into it. It wasn’t like she wanted to be talked out of it.
She stared at today’s lockscreen picture on the computer screen, a night sky with northern lights.
A local adoption agency would be best. She could make an appointment and take Ramiro with her .
No, she couldn’t do that. They’d assume he was responsible for the decision, just like the doctor had when she’d mentioned abortion.
“Summer?”
She flushed at the sound of Ramiro’s voice, her gaze drawn to him. She used to think his fancy suits were the sexiest thing ever. Lately, she preferred the soft sleep pants he wore around their house.
Their house. Her mouth got dry just thinking the words.
Ramiro’s smile spread as he drew closer. “Hmmm, now I want to know what’s on your mind, baby girl.”
She still loved every time he called her that. He dropped the term so often she should be used to it, but a part of her never would be. That part noted each and every use, along with that wide smile and the glint in his eyes.
Ramiro’s hands landed on her chair, swiveling it toward him so he could lean closer. “What has you blushing?”
She studied his broad chest. It looked even broader bare, that chest hair of his dark against his tanned skin.
“You,” she blurted out. “I’m thinking about you, Ramiro.”
“Fuck.” He released the word before capturing her lips in a quick kiss. He’d been doing that a lot. Kissing her. Quick ones and lingering ones and ones that made her want to clutch on to him and beg for more.
He never did more, though. He just kissed her .
Sometimes the memory of him pushing inside of her, making her orgasm over and over, seemed like a fever dream. One with an unhappy ending.
“Stop trying to distract me. I came to ask if you’d mind if we didn’t go home right away tonight.”
“Do you have a job?” Summer asked. “You can just drop me off at home, or I could—”
He pressed his lips to hers again, the sensation spiking inside of her as he took her words.
His breath brushed against her lips. “I have nothing to do but spend time with you. Wanna go for a drive?” His brown eyes looked so warm when they clung to hers the way they were doing. “I used to do that a lot on Friday nights and have missed it.”
“You don’t have to keep coming up with things to do on Friday nights.” She forced a smile, something that was hard to do whenever she thought of that last girls’ night. The Friday before, he’d picked up her favorite Thai food and picked out a movie for them to watch. It’d almost seemed like a date, but he’d studied her with that careful expression he got sometimes, as if he knew how sad she was feeling.
“I don’t miss hanging out with my neighbors,” she reassured him. “I like to be with you.”
“I know you do.” Ramiro used his grip on her chair to tug her a little closer. “And I’m not doing this for you. I really do miss taking a drive. ”
“Oh.” Summer felt a twinge. He loved his cars. She’d been taking him away from that. “I understand. I’ll be fine alone.”
Ramiro crouched, his finger sliding along her bottom lip. “I’m not asking for time alone. I want to take you on a date, Summer.” He hummed in his throat, that sound he got when he was thinking. She’d always wanted to feel that sound, to press her lips against his throat and let them tingle with the vibration.
The word ‘date’ rang in her ears, making it too hard to move.
“Cars aren’t your thing, though,” he said. “Would you rather go out to dinner? Would that be better?”
She didn’t like that idea. All the men she’d dated took her to restaurants. She pictured the sunset glowing on Ramiro’s skin as she watched him from the passenger seat. Imagined him parking somewhere and leaning over to kiss her. “I’d like to go on a drive.”
His brow creased as he searched her eyes. “It doesn’t have to be what I want to do. What would make you happy, baby girl?”
She reached out, brushing her thumb over his worry lines. “That would make me happy.”
His smile was back. “All right. But you pick the music.”
They closed up the office, and he opened the passenger door for her. “It’s not the same as the Bugatti, but it’ll have to do,” he muttered, waiting for her to tuck her legs in before closing the door.
After getting in, he handed her his unlocked phone. A music streaming service was already up. “Pick something. ”
Nerves twisted in her stomach. At least the app had the last things he’d listened to. That should make it easy.
“Don’t pick any of my usual stations. I want to know what you like.”
Summer bit her lip. What did she like? She listened to music when she was cleaning, but those songs had a fast beat and were kind of girly, more about the energy they gave than the music itself. Ramiro would hate that type of music. He’d probably hate anything she liked. His tastes were much better than hers.
“Hey.” His hand settled on her arm, rubbing lightly. “It’s okay if the first station you choose doesn’t feel right. This choice isn’t set in stone. Let’s try some new things, see what we like.”
New things. That made it a bit easier. If he didn’t like what she picked, she could pretend it was new. She started scrolling through the popular list, but her hands itched to type in an artist.
She liked an indie singer she’d come across in a video. His voice was deep and kind of bluesy. When she used to wake up in the middle of the night from a nightmare, she’d put it on. Her eyes slanted to Ramiro as he pulled out of the parking lot. Would he like the music she did? The idea of it was tantalizing.
Before she could decide, he surprised her by pulling into a fast-food drive-through. All he ordered were fries, giant paper containers of them, and soft drinks. Grinning, he handed her some fries, placing the drinks in the cupholder.
“Fries taste better in the car. ”
She balanced it between her legs carefully to free her hands. Ramiro kept his car so clean. She couldn’t make a mess.
His smile looked slightly guilty. “I don’t always eat like some young kid while I drive.”
She couldn’t keep her giggle contained, and pure joy took over his face, his eyes sparkling back into hers.
“Music, baby girl,” he reminded her, facing forward to pull out.
Summer clicked on the search bar, typing in the singer’s name that she loved and choosing it.
Toward the end of the first song, Ramiro hummed in his throat. “I’ve never heard this. He’s pretty good.”
Summer’s back relaxed into the seat as she set his phone down. She popped a fry into her mouth. Ramiro was right. They tasted better in the car, especially when so warm.
The buildings and lights tapered off as they drove. Ramiro found some two-lane highway with nothing but marsh and open fields on either side. The light of the setting sun washed over his face just like she’d imagined.
Summer’s head rested on the seat back, turned toward him. Her muscles loosened, her fingers still where they lay in her lap. A contentedness swept over her as she gazed at him. There was nowhere else she’d rather be, except wrapped up in his arms.
If Ramiro went a little too fast out there in the middle of nowhere, it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. He had a reckless part of him hidden inside. Otherwise, he’d never have climbed up onto the edge of that bridge beside her so long ago.
The music app ran out of songs by the artist she’d picked, but it switched into similar music from artists that she didn’t know, and she enjoyed them almost as much.
With the sun down, Ramiro’s profile was harder to make out, but she didn’t look away. He’d finished his fries, and she took the container from him while he drove, tucking her own inside even though she’d only finished about half. She sipped at the lemon-lime soda he’d gotten with the fries—a caffeine-free option, of course. He was always thinking of things like that.
Just as he thought of this date for her.
Drowsiness pulled at her, but she didn’t close her eyes, not wanting to miss a moment of staring at the man beside her. He was masculine and confident and caring as well, but above all, he was so amazingly precious to her.
Ramiro slowed at the next junction between the long, empty stretches. He sighed, swinging them around. “I guess we shouldn’t stay out too late.”
“I liked this,” Summer admitted.
As he picked up speed again, his hand reached over to hers, curling around it with a squeeze. “Me too, baby girl. I like every moment with you.”
There was a tickling inside her chest. One that spread.
Being with Ramiro was happiness. She wanted more of that.