Chapter 14
Natalie
Well, I could cross ‘have the best sex of my life’ off my bucket list. I was lying naked on my very uncomfortable hardwood floor. Slick with sweat and a few other things, and I wouldn’t move if the building was on fire. Jake kissed me soft and slow before he pulled out and rolled to the side.
“Shit, we made a mess.” He kissed me again and then pushed to his feet.
He padded naked to the bathroom, and I watched him go.
Why had I never noticed how sexy back muscles were before?
Those are the muscles that held him over me as he coaxed two orgasms out of me.
Maybe it was one really long one, hell if I knew.
He came back with a damp cloth and passed it to me, before collapsing onto the couch.
I gave myself a very quick and unladylike freshen-up below the belt before I snagged a polka-dot throw blanket from the back of the couch and wrapped it around myself like a tacky toga.
“Are you cold?”
I shook my head. “I just feel weird sitting here naked.” My body type was on the curvier side, whereas my sister was petite, lean, and strong. Although I loved my body, I had grown up comparing myself to my sister, and old habits died hard.
“That’s too bad. I like every version of you, but I think naked Natalie is my favorite.
” He studied my face for a moment, and I busied myself smoothing out the blanket.
He slid his finger under my chin and moved my face, so I was looking at him.
“Hey, I hope you don’t feel weird because of me.
I know we don’t know each other that well.
I guess we do more now than we did an hour ago, but you don’t have to hide from me. ”
I squirmed a little. The fact that he even thought to ask about how I felt made him head and shoulders above any other man I’d dated.
He leaned down to pick up his shirt, then paused. “I know you probably think I compare you to other women I’ve been with or ones I see on social media, but when I’m with you, you’re all I see and when I’m not with you, I wish I was.”
He pulled his shirt over his head and reached for his boxers. “I just wanted you to know that.”
Tears pricked the backs of my eyes. How could they not?
My romantic little heart wanted to rub what he said in the face of every Hallmark movie heroine who got her happily ever after while I was home alone eating popcorn.
The problem, of course, was I couldn’t be falling for my fake husband.
I couldn’t be. This whole tangled mess would get a whole lot more tangled and, well, messy, if real feelings entered the equation.
Unfortunately, given the way my heart was growing like a certain green Christmas character, I may already have been head over heels for Jake.
******
If I had expected waking up with Jake in my bed to be strange, I was wrong.
Opening my eyes to see proof that last night had, in fact, happened was the best way to start my day.
I studied him in the early morning light.
The stress that had been on his face the night before had disappeared, and I was glad I could see him truly at peace, even if it was only while unconscious.
My king-size bed fit the two of us nicely and somehow, he looked sexy even covered by my rose-patterned duvet.
We didn’t spend the night cuddling and spooning like they do in the movies.
That was one of those things that seemed romantic until both people were sweating buckets, and someone’s arm was numb.
Still, feeling comfortable enough with my fake spouse to crawl into bed with my hair a mess and my retainer in my mouth spoke volumes about how close we’d become.
I slid out of bed, careful not to wake him, and grabbed my robe from the back of the door.
My back felt a little bruised from being railed into the living room floor.
Just the memory of it had me thinking about heading back to my room and waking Jake up in the dirtiest way I could come up with.
That was a bad idea. Uncomplicated. Just friends.
Prioritizing Jake’s health. All of those things would be in jeopardy if I turned and walked back into that room.
Hell, maybe we had already gone too far over the line to go back.
I tiptoed to the kitchen and put the coffee on.
I wasn’t scheduled to work until noon, but I grabbed my laptop and started scanning through emails anyway.
Overachiever problems. One in particular caught my eye.
HR had posted Bernie’s job. The job was a driver for the bookmobile, and I might just know the perfect person for the job.
I don’t know why I didn’t think of it until now.
It wasn’t like I didn’t know the job was coming. I planned the retirement party.
Kamloops was a small city that was surrounded by little communities.
Not every community was big enough for a library, hence, the bookmobile.
It was basically a bus, crammed full of books that acted as a library on wheels.
People loved it and more importantly, it required a special license to drive. A license Jake had.
I bit my lip.
The coffee pot dinged that it was ready, and Jake wandered into the kitchen as I was making a cup. He wrapped his arms around me from behind and held me to his chest for a long, wonderful moment. “Thank you for taking care of me, Natalie. You don’t know how much I appreciate you.”
Why was he the sweetest? Again. “There’s coffee if you want some.”
“You’re going for sainthood now. Although, I slept better than I have in weeks.” We sat at the table with our cups.
This was nice. Companionable silence while we drank our coffee. That wasn’t what this was destined to be. I needed to get to the bottom of why he’d come here last night and let him know about the job. “Can I ask you about what was wrong last night?”
Jake spun his cup in his hands. His stubble had taken on a life of its own, he had an adorable cowlick on one side of his head, and he was barefoot and bare-chested. He said he slept, but he still looked exhausted. My heart broke for him all over again.
“The therapy isn’t working the way I thought it would. I guess I was naive to expect a miracle cure, I don’t know.” He looked at anything but me. “I have no idea what to do now and I just, I’m lost.”
I reached out to hold his hand and took a steadying breath to keep from becoming a blubbering mess. “Would you consider another job?” I asked as gently as I could, hoping he couldn’t hear the emotions swirling inside me.
He blew out a breath. “I don’t think I have another choice at this point. Driving is all I’ve ever been any good at, and it might take a while to find another job.”
I turned my laptop screen to face him and held my breath.
If he got this job, he would be free of the anxiety-inducing danger of the highway.
He’d have a more regular work schedule. He could focus on his mental health.
He would also have the same benefits I had.
He wouldn’t have a reason to stay married to me.
Worse, I would have to see him at work and try not to let the fact that I was a smitten kitten show.
I sipped my coffee, watching his eyes scan over the screen.
As he reached the bottom, they flashed up to meet mine. “Do you think I have a shot?”
I forced a smile and nodded, even as my coffee turned to acid in my stomach.
I didn’t want to lose him. I liked having him be mine, but his mental health was suffering.
Marrying him hadn’t fixed things. Something had to change for his sake.
He wouldn’t need me anymore, but he’d have the space he needed to heal.
“You’d get the same medical benefits as I have, and you’d be driving but not dealing with accidents.
If the roads are too slippery in the winter, you have the option to just cancel the run rather than risk your life. I think you should go for it.”
He stood and hugged me again. “How many times are you going to save me?”
I hugged him back. I didn’t know what I would do without him. But I had a feeling I was going to find out sooner than I’d hoped.