Chapter 20
TWENTY
Benji had said goodbye to Joshua many times over the years, but today was the hardest yet.
He’d clung to Van until it was time to leave or stay forever, and a small piece of his heart stayed behind.
Benji sulked the whole drive back to the beach house.
As much as he loved his career on stage, leaving Joshua and Van truly sucked in the worst, most painful way possible.
“I guess I don’t have to ask if you’ll be staying here for the winter, or going back north,” he said.
Joshua gave him a funny look, then turned onto their side street. “I came down here only expecting to stay a few months, but as long as Bobby and Danielle don’t mind me subletting a while longer, I definitely hope to stay. Good reason to now.”
“No kidding.”
“Are you jealous?”
“No.” Benji watched the house grow larger, an ominous sign that this trip to the shore was nearly over. “Like I said before, I’m glad you guys will have each other while I’m gone, and I mean it. I’m in mourning, I guess.”
“Mourning?”
“The three of us have lived in this wonderful little bubble for the past week, and now we’ve got to pop it and let the real world inside. So much of it feels like a dream.”
Joshua parked on the street in front of the house, then turned to Benji.
His lovely face was so, so sad. “It wasn’t a dream, babe.
It was the most amazing week of my life, and I cannot wait for the three of us to spend time together again.
And not even for sex. As much as I dislike Glee, I love watching you two watch it, because you both love it and it shows.
I love eating with you both, sleeping with you both. ”
“We can make this work, right? The three of us?”
“Yes, we can, and we will. I promise.”
Benji leaned across the console to kiss him, one last private kiss before the more public goodbyes began.
Lincoln and Emmett were likely inside to wish everyone well.
Benji couldn’t help a small pang of guilt over not spending more time with Lincoln.
Lincoln battled every single day with the effects of his head injury, and he craved the attention of his friends.
Benji had failed a bit in being a good friend this week. He’d make it up to Linc somehow.
The usual suspects were in the living room eating delivery pizza, the band’s equipment in a pile near the front door and ready to be loaded into the van.
Benji and Joshua fielded the usual greetings.
The pizza smelled great, but Benji’s stomach rebelled at the idea of all that grease and bread.
He was wound too damned tight over leaving to be hungry.
“Glad you’re back,” Lincoln said. “Dominic wanted us to call when we were all together.”
“Something wrong?” Benji asked, immediately on alert.
“No, I think he wanted to talk about his parents’ anniversary next month.” Lincoln swiped across his phone, then set it on the coffee table.
The speaker blared as the phone dialed, then Dominic’s cheerful voice said, “Hey, bitches!”
A chorus of greetings went around. “So what’s up, dude?” Lincoln asked.
“Trey’s here with me, by the way, but you probably figured.
Anyhow, I finally got all my siblings on board with the second weekend in November, that Sunday, to pull a surprise party for our parents.
Thirty-five years is a big deal, and all of you guys are invited if you can make it. Who’s actually there, by the way?”
Lincoln laughed out loud. “Me, Em, Benji, Joshua, Andy, Dani, and Bobby.”
“Awesome. If there’s anyone else you guys want to bring along, feel free.”
Benji glanced at Joshua, whose expression seemed to say the exact same thing: Van.
“Taisha found a conference hall at a nearby senior center that we’re renting,” Dominic continued, “so I’ll send you the coordinates. She’s getting Mom and Dad there under the ruse of a neighborhood chicken and dumplings dinner, and Dad can never resist those.”
“Sounds excellent,” Lincoln said. “Percell’s gonna be there too?”
“Yup. Mostly we had to make sure he could get leave that weekend, but it’s all a go.” Percell was Dominic’s oldest adopted brother, and being active military, he had a stricter schedule that his siblings. “This is great. I can’t wait to see you guys.”
“Us too, Dom,” Benji said. He, Dominic, and Lincoln had been the backbone of XYZ for two years. Benji missed being around his friends. “We’ll make sure Eddie can work our schedule out so we can all be there.”
“Good. And bring your instruments. The hall has a stage.”
Lincoln snorted. “Are you selling tickets to this thing?”
“Nah, you know my parents love you guys. Trey and me are gonna do a few songs, too. Right?”
“Yup.” Trey’s voice echoed a bit, probably further from the phone that Dom. “I can’t wait to see you guys.”
“Ditto, bro!” Danielle said.
“Coolness,” Dominic said. “Listen, I know Fading Daze has to get on the road. Linc, you want to call me back after those knuckleheads are gone? Touch base?”
“Sure, dude, later,” Lincoln said. A round of goodbyes went up, and Lincoln ended the call.
“All right, you guys,” Bobby said. “This shit won’t load itself.”
They hadn’t used the equipment much, other than a few brief rehearsals, but storing it in the house was safer than leaving it in the van all week.
Not only because of the humidity and chill at night, but also possible theft.
None of them had a few grand in their back pockets to replace it.
With seven pairs of hands, it didn’t take long to get everything loaded up, including luggage.
Benji went in for a solid hug from Lincoln. “Sorry I wasn’t around much this week.”
“Hey, no worries.” Lincoln smacked a wet kiss on his cheek. “I’m glad to see you and Joshua in such a good place. You two had me worried this summer.”
“We’re in a great place now.” They were all mingling outside, so Lincoln’s sunglasses protected his eyes, but Benji knew him well enough to see the unasked questions. “Me and Joshua are better than we’ve ever been.”
“Good. Keep it that way.”
Benji laughed. “Emmett, take care of this troublemaker, okay?”
Emmett appeared by Lincoln’s side. “I will.”
Joshua pulled Benji to the other side of the van for a hint of privacy, and tucked him close to his chest. Benji wrapped his arms around Joshua’s waist, pressed his nose into his neck. Inhaled his familiar, spicy scent. Listened to the ragged sound of his breathing.
“I love you so much,” Benji whispered. “Gonna miss you.”
“Me too. You be careful out there, okay?”
“I will. At least I know I’ll see you in a few weeks at the anniversary party.”
“We need to talk about that.”
“We will. Think he’ll want to go?”
Joshua stroked his back. “I hope so.”
It would be as good a place as any to reveal their poly relationship—unless Van thought it would distract too much from the point of the party.
Danielle rounded to their side of the van. “Kiss your boyfriend, and let’s go.”
Benji groaned, but did as he was told. He left another small piece of his heart behind in that driveway, but he could leave thankful that those pieces had each other. And he’d see both of them again soon.
Joshua always hated the first few hours after saying goodbye to Benji, and this time it didn’t hurt any less. He soothed his pain by crashing on the couch and watching a couple of bad horror movies with Lincoln and a bowl of popcorn.
At the end of the second film, right as the villain proved to be not quite dead after all, and killed the only survivor, Lincoln said, “Are you dating Van?”
“What?” Joshua sat up straighter on his end of the couch. “Why would you ask that?”
“Melody mentioned you guys were over there almost every single day.” Lincoln stopped the movie so he could take off his shades. His striking blue eyes were curious, with no hint of reproach or disgust.
Joshua flailed with his answer. On one hand, they hadn’t decided not to tell anyone about their threesome.
On the other hand, they hadn’t discussed what to do if someone asked about them.
He didn’t want to lie, because lying was like denying his feelings for Van, and that would be a betrayal. “Yes?”
“Yes, you guys were at Van’s, or yes, you’re dating him?”
“Both.”
Lincoln squinted at him. “And Benji’s okay with that? I thought you two were exclusive.”
“We are, and yes, he is. We’re all, uh, dating each other.”
“All three of you?”
“Yes?”
“Dude, I’m not attacking you or interrogating you. No judgments. But Benji’s my friend, and so is Van, and I don’t want any of you guys to get hurt.”
Joshua tensed. “We know what we’re doing. All three of us started this with our eyes wide open. It’s hard to explain, but we work. And we’re happy.”
“Okay. Has Benji told the band about it?”
“No. We all want to settle into it first, you know? Define the relationship for ourselves, before we start telling people.”
“I can accept that. But you really should tell Melody and Emmett, since they already suspect something’s going on. They’ll keep your secret, Joshua, I promise.”
“I’m surprised Van hasn’t told Melody already.”
Lincoln chuckled. “I think she’s been too preoccupied with her own love life to bother much with Van’s.”
Joshua latched onto that crumb, eager to get the conversation off of his sparkling new poly relationship. “So things are going well with her and Adrian?”
“So far, so good. Emmett reports that she’s been over to the house several times this week to have dinner with Adrian and Beatrice.”
“Good for her.” Joshua’s phone chimed with a text.
Van: Brunch at my place tomorrow? 11?
He typed back he’d be there, with a few extra smiling emojis.
“You have fun with your phone, pal.” Lincoln lifted himself off the couch with a small groan. “It’s been a busy day and I feel a headache coming on. See you in the morning.”
“G’night.”