Chapter 20
R ival
"I'm telling you, that wasn't a foul. You're just mad ’cause I blocked your damn shot."
TJ's protest echoed across the driveway as Gray laughed, spinning the basketball on his finger despite the fact that he was fucking wasted.
"Call it whatever you want." Gray shrugged. "Still doesn't change the fact that I'm up by four games."
"Muthafucker, you’re drunk. TJ is only down by one." Jairo chuckled from the porch where he was nursing a beer. "Let the man have his dignity."
"What dignity?" I laughed, tossing TJ a bottle of water as he joined us on the porch steps. "Gray beat your ass though, had you struggling out there, and you’re sober as shit. That’s not a good look."
TJ didn’t drink much because of his past struggles with depression; so he barely finished one beer tonight.
"He’s a professional athlete."
"Football, not basketball, muthafucker," Gray added, lifting his own water. “And I’ve been drinking Henny.”
TJ smiled and shrugged. “My ego is good, Gray.”
Gray chuckled and dapped TJ.
The night had been chill, even after I was not thrilled about our mandatory male bonding that the ladies forced. TJ and Gray had arrived together, bringing beer and food, and Jairo had shown up shortly after with more alcohol after I hit him up and asked that he be my backup just in case this didn’t go well. Oddly enough, shit was cool between everyone.
While TJ and Gray continued to debate their skills, Jairo turned his attention to me.
"Got the family over here chilling. I’m guessing you’re surviving this shit?”
“Yeah, we’re good.”
He grinned and nodded. “I thought for sure this was going to be the dumbest shit you’ve ever done in your life and you’ve done some pretty crazy shit, fam.”
I chuckled because I couldn’t argue that point. “Marrying Sail wasn’t a dumb decision.”
“You sure about that? Last I checked, you married a woman you barely knew because she was drunk and wanted to fuck you."
"It's more complicated than that.”
I refused to openly admit all Sail’s insecurities because they were mine for safe keeping but he didn’t press.
"Always is with women." Jairo shook his head. "Especially women like her."
"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"
He was my boy, but she was my wife, and there was no way in hell I would let him disrespect her. I also understood where his concern came from. He knew my past, which meant he was more than aware of what a woman like Sailor had the potential to do to a man like me.
"It means," Gray interrupted, apparently having overheard, "that my sister-in-law is a lot to deal with but she also brings a lot to the table. So if you feel like he’s more invested than she is, then you’re fucking wrong."
The tension thickened as Jairo held up his hands defensively. "It’s not about what either of them bring to the table, but more about what her priorities are going to be.” He looked at me, communicating what they didn’t know before he turned to Gray and TJ. “I'm just looking out for my boy. You can't blame me for being concerned."
"No, but I can blame you for judging my sister without knowing her." TJ’s expression was hard because he was shifting into defensive mode.
"Fair enough," Jairo conceded. "Enlighten me. What's changed in the last six weeks that makes you think this is going to work?"
I considered the question, aware that TJ and Gray were now listening too. It was a fair question, one I had asked myself more times than I could count. I wanted more from Sailor than I had in my past, but Sailor wasn’t my ex, regardless of how many times I made the comparison. The problem was, she had no clue about my past, because if she did, she would surely fucking run.
"She’s changed.” I raked a hand down my face. “Or maybe we both have. It's not just about the prenup anymore, what we agreed to on paper or me forcing her to be in this. She wants to be here..." I glared at my boy before finishing. “And so do I, so we’re making it work. Shit’s not perfect but what ever is?”
"Not a damn thing?" TJ said.
"I know how it started and what it looks like from the outside. But there's more to your sister than most people see." I laughed. “Shit, mostly because Sail is so fucking guarded that no one gets the opportunity to see her, but I do, and I don’t take that lightly.”
TJ nodded. “That’s all that matters then.”
"And you're okay with the baggage? Because everyone in the Addison family comes with a truckload of that shit." Gray’s tone was light, like he knew the mood needed to be adjusted.
"Says the man who married into it," TJ snorted.
"Exactly. I’m speaking from experience because I know what the fuck I’m talking about."
“After that family dinner, I can speak from experience too.”
TJ chuckled. “My father is my father. He’ll get his shit together, but as long as you show up for Sail, we got you.”
I tossed my chin in acknowledgment.
"If you’re good, then I’m good,” Jairo added.
"I’m good.”
Jairo laughed, shaking his head, then lifting his beer. “Your ass is really all in on this, aren't you?"
"I have been from the beginning."
"Why?" TJ asked. “My sister isn't exactly the settling down type. What made you think this could work?"
"You ever just know something? Not logically or based on evidence, but in your gut?"
“I’m an attorney. Everything I do is based on logic and evidence.” He smirked. “But I know what you mean.”
“From the moment I met Sailor, there was something there. A connection that didn’t logically make sense but I felt that shit. Even when she was being difficult.” I grinned. “Especially then and when she got drunk that night begging me to f…” I paused and noticed TJ frowning when he realized what I was about to say. I smirked. “…proposing this ridiculous ass marriage..."
"You saw an opportunity to fuck her," Jairo said.
TJ shot him a deadly glare so I moved things forward.
"I saw an opportunity that might not happen again, so I went with it.”
"That's some romantic bullshit right there." Jairo laughed. “And even though I think you’re fucking insane for going through with it, I get it. Sail is cool people."
"What's your endgame?" Gray asked. "The prenup has an expiration date, right? What happens when the year is up?"
"I'm hoping she won’t leave.” I laughed. “At this point that’s all I got because you never fucking know with Sail.”
"And if she does?" TJ asked.
"Then I'll have to let her go because you know your sister as well as I do. Sailor does what she wants and is not the type of woman you keep somewhere she has no interest in being."
Which was how I knew that regardless of her resistance, she wanted this damn marriage and me.
Gray brushed a hand over his head. "She's different with you, which says a lot."
"She seems happy," TJ agreed. "Still Sailor, but there's a lightness to her I haven't seen in a long time. So whatever you two have going on and whatever you’re doing is working."
"Thanks."
"Don't thank us yet," Gray warned. "Being with an Addison is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. Just when you think you've got that shit track figured out, there's a drop you don’t see coming."
“I should be offended, but I can’t really argue that shit." TJ laughed. "Indi says this family is exhausting and too fucking demanding." He turned to Gray. "Speaking of demanding, how's the new baby prep going? Sky mentioned you were knee-deep in nursery renovations."
Gray groaned. "Don't get me fucking started. I've repainted that damn room twice because apparently sage green and mint green are completely different colors that will psychologically affect our child's development."
"Wait till the name debates start. Sky's gonna have a spreadsheet with pros and cons for every possibility," TJ said.
"She already does. Complete with historical significance and potential nicknames to avoid."
We all listened while he got all his gripes about preparing for their second child off his chest but I got distracted when a text came through from Sail.
Sailor: Surviving?
Me: Are you checking on me?
Sailor: We’re a team, even if you wouldn’t save me from my emotional overload.
I chuckled.
Me: If it makes you feel any better, I think we were set up. I’ve had to do a deep dive with my emotions too. I’m starting to believe that was the purpose of this shit.
Sailor: Knowing my sister, I would have to agree. She probably sent Teej and Gray with a list of intentional bullet points to cover with you.
From what I knew of Skylar, I would agree, but I also felt TJ and Gray’s concerns were genuine.
Me: Nah, I think this is just a case of protective big brothers.
The dots started and stopped a few times before her text popped up.
Sailor: But you’re okay, right? You have the right to tell them to mind their business.
Me: I’m good. I also don’t have anything to hide. I have no problem telling anyone who asks I fuck with my wife heavy and I fuck my wife heavy.
Sailor: Please tell me you haven’t discussed fucking me with my brother. There’s so much wrong with that
Me: I wouldn’t do that to you. I don’t do pussy talk with anyone and damn sure not your brother. Now go focus on your emotional shit. I need them to reinforce what I’ve been trying to do.
Sailor: Which is?
Me: Convince you that I’m the perfect husband and we’re in this shit.
Sailor: I don’t need them for that…
Sailor: Have fun and behave
I locked my phone, reading between the lines. My wife appreciated being my wife.
"Yeah, y’all damn sure in this shit. Can’t even have your full attention for one night.” Jairo chuckled, finishing his beer
"Just updating her on TJ's basketball skills.”
"Or lack thereof," Gray added, garnering a middle finger from TJ.
"How's girls' night going?" TJ asked.
"According to Sailor, your wives are analyzing her feelings.”
TJ and Gray exchanged knowing looks. “So she’s ready to bail then? She hates shit like that."
"She needs it though," Gray added. "Sail bottles everything up until she explodes."
"Sounds familiar." Jairo cut his eyes at me. "You two might be more compatible than I thought."
"Alright, enough feelings talk," Gray declared, standing up. "Who's ready for steaks? I didn't bring these prime ribeyes just to look at them."
"I'll fire up the grill."
"Need a hand?" TJ asked, joining me by the grill with a bottle of water and a beer, which he extended to me.
"Nah, I got it," I assured him, accepting the beer which I tipped to him in thanks.
He nodded and leaned against the deck railing. "When Sailor first told me what happened, I thought she’d lost her damn mind and had finally gone too far. I just knew this was going to be a mistake she wouldn't be able to talk her way out of."
"Technically she hasn’t?"
He chuckled. "Regardless, I'm thinking this might be the best mistake she’s ever made. You're good for her, Rival, and I think she might be good for you too."
"She is," I agreed, because truthfully, I needed Sail in my life as much as she needed me in hers.
"Be patient with her," TJ said. "Sailor's never had to be vulnerable with anyone outside the family. She doesn't know how."
"I've noticed," I said dryly.
"With you, she's trying, and that’s a huge fucking deal."
"I know and I'm not going anywhere. No matter how hard she pushes. If this ends, it will be because of her. She’ll have to leave because I won’t."
"Good.” He nodded in understanding. “Welcome to the family, for real this time."
We spent the rest of the night moving back and forth between discussion about sports, work, and relationships. I found myself truly relaxed and present in a way I hadn't been in years. Jairo was my boy but he was single and still on a pussy chase. TJ and Gray understood the world I was navigating with Sailor because they were part of it too. They knew her, loved her, wanted the best for her. Jairo wanted what was best for me so he kept my head level and I needed that shit too.
By the time we shut everything down, TJ drove Gray home because he was a little too buzzed to drive and Jairo crashed in my guest room instead of heading home after too much brown liquor. I ended up in bed with a hard dick the minute Sailor’s scent lifted from the pillow and sheets. I considered pulling up to bring her home but she needed this time with her sister and Indi so I texted her instead.
Me: This bed is lonely as fuck and the house is too quiet without you.
Sailor: Just getting into bed here too. My apartment feels strange now. Too empty. No you.
Me: Want me to come get you?
Sailor: No, it's late. We can survive one night.
Me: You sure? Because my dick thinks otherwise.
Sailor: You have hands.
Me: Not the same and after I bust that nut, my hands can’t do shit for missing you next to me. Nothing competes with the real thing, not just your pussy. All of you.
Sailor: Good comeback.
I chuckled when she sent a follow.
Sailor: I’ll be home tomorrow.
Home. The word hit somewhere deep. Six weeks ago, Sailor would never have referred to my house as home.
Me: I'll be here. Sleep well.
Sailor: You too and Rival…
Me: Yeah?
Sailor: Thank you.
Me: For what?
Sailor: For seeing me. The real me. Not many people do. Sky and Indi might have forced me to do emotion talk but I’m glad they did. I’m happy…
I stared at the message, reading it again to be sure I'd understood. It was perhaps the most vulnerable thing she'd ever said to me, at least in writing.
Me: Me too. Very fucking happy. Goodnight, wife.
Sailor: Goodnight, husband.
As I set my phone aside and settled into bed, I found myself smiling like a damn idiot. TJ's words echoed in my mind: she's trying. She was. We both were and that was a good thing because I loved my wife and wasn’t sure if I could do the right thing and let her go if she didn’t catch up and love me back.