Chapter 15 Darkness #3
But then it dawned on her that he mentioned he no longer desired marriage. Goodness gracious! Was he contemplating other arrangements without matrimony? Surely not.
Elizabeth had not set eyes on this man in years. She possessed no knowledge of his character whatsoever. Furthermore, she had heard rumours of more liberal practices in other countries, such as France, or even certain locales within England itself. Surely, he is not suggesting that.
"Did I hear you correctly? Did you express a lack of interest in marriage 'anymore'? Pray tell, Mr. Goulding, what is your proposition?" she inquired, facing him directly.
"Miss Bennet, my mother has been pestering me to marry, against my wishes.
It was she who directed you towards me. She mentioned that you had already rejected a proposal and had no other suitors.
She also suggested that you felt trapped in your own home and might welcome an avenue of escape.
I must now admit, I somewhat understand her perspective," he replied.
It was the truth. Yet, it stung. It stung deeply. It confirmed what she had already surmised. Her standing in society is that of a spinster now. And it was all her mother's doing.
"So, you seek a marriage of convenience," she stated, her voice low.
"Yes. I have the means to provide for you.
Though my estate is not yet prosperous, it is in good condition, and I have some plans to enhance its productivity.
All I require is an heir. You shall have ample freedom.
I shall not trouble you excessively. In truth, I shall be staying away from you for the most part.
You shall be the mistress of the house. My mother is a kind-hearted soul, and she will not interfere.
She has always held you in high regard and mentioned you in her letters.
Furthermore, even in the event of an unfortunate circumstance befalling me, there is a dowager house available.
It may be modest, but it is adequate for one person.
Thus, as you aptly stated, a marriage of convenience.
I can offer you a home, protection, and, in your case, an escape from your own home," he paused.
There it is. Exactly the kind of proposal she was contemplating minutes ago.
The sort of proposal she should be willing to accept in her present condition.
The young man standing before her was unlike Mr. Collins.
He seemed to possess some intelligence. It appears that his love for his mother is genuine, indicating his capacity for love.
Regarding procuring an heir, Elizabeth didn’t possess an exact understanding of how babies are born in this world, but she knew enough that "staying away" wouldn't get you anywhere on that front.
"So the talk about courtship was all nonsense. You were always meant to propose," she replied. If one can call this a proposal.
"I must admit, I was nervous. I never wanted a courtship. But I was concerned that a straightforward proposal after not seeing each other for thirteen years might seem excessive," he honestly confessed.
"I can understand that perspective. So what is it then? Courtship or betrothal?" she asked.
"That is for you to answer. I have now decided that I don't want a courtship. If you are agreeable to my proposal, then I will go directly to your father," he replied.
"I need to know one thing. I can understand why you stated that you don't love me. But why did you say that you will never love me?" she asked.
Suddenly, he grew uneasy and resumed pacing. His countenance turned grave, and a hint of sorrow emerged. Then he faced her, she saw the tears welled up in his eyes.
Oh no, please don't cry. I cannot bear yet another gentleman's tears.
Rosings Park, Kent
Richard
Richard saw his aunt’s eyes were on his. It was decision time.
Rosings surpassed Pemberley in size, resources, and number of tenants. If managed astutely, Rosings held far greater potential than what Pemberley was currently yielding. He could be wealthier than Darcy.
Richard was not a fool. This was a pivotal moment in his life, a golden opportunity, one he would never decline.
"Yes, Aunt, I have reached a decision. I gratefully accept your offer. I shall promptly journey to London to sell my commission and resign from active duty," he replied.
"Very well. I knew you possessed intelligence. As for your query regarding my move to the Dower House, I wish for you to hold complete authority here. These servants and staff were appointed by me, and I do not want them to be uncertain about whom they should adhere to," his aunt responded.
"Are there any other members of the De Bourgh family who may contest this? Are there potential heirs for this estate?" Darcy, as always, posed the important question.
"Darcy, do you understand why I directed Anne towards you?
I knew you would never depart from Pemberley, and therefore, even after marriage, Anne would live with you there.
I selfishly believed I could continue to reside here and manage everything.
For the past twenty-five years, my only concern has been how to maintain my hold on this estate throughout my lifetime.
Thus, afford me the respect to assume that I have already investigated all possible heirs who could one day challenge my position.
There is no one else. Absolutely no one.
Richard shall be the sole owner," she replied.
There was nothing more to be said on that matter.
Longbourn, Hertfordshire
Elizabeth
If Elizabeth harboured any doubts regarding Mr. Goulding's capacity to love, they swiftly dissipated as soon as he began to speak.
"I am in love with another, Miss Elizabeth. Alas, she can never be mine. She passed away three months ago."
Dear God, poor man.
"I met Miss Elaine Johnson during my early years at Eton. My friend Jacob, Mr. Jacob Johnson, resided in close proximity to the dormitory where I stayed. Elaine was his sister, and I was instantly captivated by her. It took several days, but I managed to gain her affection.
Jacob, my friend, was fully aware about us and offered his support.
My intention was to return here after completing my studies and inform my parents of my desire to seek her hand.
Yet, three months prior to the conclusion of my classes, she suddenly fell gravely ill, and.
.. I can still envision her frail form and wearied eyes, beseeching me to let go of her.
Miss Bennet, no one can replace her in my life.
Please forgive me, it is better if I refrain from further discussion on this matter," he turned away, no longer facing her.
Elizabeth pondered the ironies of life. Three individuals, herself, Mr. Darcy, and Mr. Goulding. All had encountered love, a blessing seldom bestowed upon many. Yet, the twist of fate dictated that all three were destined to exist without truly experiencing its fullness. It was cruel in every way.
She waited for him to compose himself, having little to say herself. After a while, he turned to her and continued.
"Miss Bennet, now that you comprehend the reasons behind my inability to love another, I implore you to keep this knowledge to yourself.
I have not disclosed it to anyone, not even to my mother, as I wish to spare her from sharing in my grief.
I must also express my profound respect for you, even though my affections do not reside with you.
Over the years, I have acquired much knowledge about you through my mother's writings.
I sensed her fondness for you, as if she desired you as a daughter, subtly fostering your presence in my thoughts.
From her words, I have learned of your love for reading, your enjoyment of the outdoors, and your inclination to speak your mind openly.
I am also aware of your unwavering love and loyalty to your family, even when they vex you.
I do not wish for you to change in any way.
As I mentioned before, you shall have complete freedom, for I will not seek to control you.
So, I ask you now, are you willing to enter the arrangement I proposed? "
It was the moment of truth. Elizabeth stood there, contemplating how her life had taken such an unfortunate turn, leading her to even consider accepting this proposal, or rather, arrangement.
Yet, her thoughts turned to the other gentleman, tall, handsome, proud, and passionately in love with her.
She vividly recalled the sight of his tears and how they had profoundly transformed her perspective on life.
She couldn't help but wonder about the anguish he must be enduring during these days.
This is the fate you deserve, Lizzy. In fact, it is far better than what you deserve.
In a voice devoid of any emotion, she responded.
"Yes, I will marry you. You may approach my father."
Rosings, Kent
Darcy
Darcy and Richard stayed in Rosings's study after Aunt Catherine left them. They remained silent for a long time. Darcy knew Richard's thoughts were not about his newly acquired estate.
"Darcy, were you aware of Anne's feelings for me?" Richard inquired.
Darcy was unaware, having actively avoided Anne whenever possible, which now seemed like a mistake. He had missed the opportunity to know a lady of remarkable character. It appeared Anne possessed hidden depths he failed to recognize.
"No, Richard, I was not aware. However, I must admit that I only witnessed her laughter in your presence. Otherwise, she remained serious and uninterested," Darcy replied.
"I cared for her. It wasn't love as Anne desired. Whenever I visited this area for official reasons, I visited her here. We spent time conversing when you and Aunt were absent. Aunt Catherine was more lenient when you were away," Richard confessed.