Chapter Eleven
A week after my doctor’s appointment, I finally got up the nerve to visit Evan. I pulled up to the Jordan house and took a deep breath. After I gathered my courage and composed myself, I climbed out of the car.
I walked up to the porch and sat on the rocking chair.
I wanted to take a few more minutes to pull myself together and make sure I didn't blurt out my condition to Evan.
He was the closest thing I had to a best friend, but I couldn't tell him this secret.
If he wasn't the uncle of the baby I was carrying, it would have been a no-brainer.
I would have told him the minute I peed on that stupid stick, but because he was Alex's brother, it would only be natural that Evan’s loyalties would lay with Alex.
Evan would either force me to tell Alex, or he'd tell him himself. A risk I simply couldn't take.
I thought back to the times we hung out and ate pizza or watched a movie, times when the three of us could laugh and joke. Just a few short months ago, I had it all.
Evan was my good friend, and he helped me through the first few awkward weeks in my new relationship with Alex. In the four months Alex was here, I had more fun than I'd ever had before. How did things change so fast?
"Jocelyn?" Evan came out the front door. "Why are you sitting on the porch?"
"Evan!" I'd been so lost in thought, I didn't hear him come outside. I got up off the rocking chair much too quickly and immediately felt lightheaded. He grabbed my arm and held me up.
"Are you okay?" I saw the worry in his face.
"Yeah." I smiled. "Just got up too fast."
Way to go, Jocelyn!
He stared at me, trying to decide if I was lying.
"What? I'm fine."
"You look tired. Are you sick?"
"No." I shook my head. "Just working a lot of hours at the coffee shop."
"Oh, trying to get in as many hours as you can before school starts?"
"Yeah, something like that." I shrugged off his question.
He pulled me into a hug, and I tensed then forced myself to relax. Don't be silly, I chastised myself. There was no way he could tell I was pregnant by hugging me, not yet, anyway. I put my arms around him and rested my head on his shoulder.
"I miss you," I whispered, and my eyes filled with tears. I am so freaking emotional
these days.
"Hey?" He looked into my wet eyes. "What's going on?"
"Nothing." I smiled. "Just having a bad day."
"Want to talk about it?"
"Maybe later. How are things with you?"
"Okay," he said. "Just getting ready for school. Classes start in a few weeks. I wish you were coming with me."
"You don't need me." I smiled. "You can commute with Brenna and Julia, and Cali's going with you."
"I always need you." He returned my smile, but he didn't have his usual sparkle.
He looked out of it. "You keep me in line."
"What is it?"
He let go of my hand and leaned against the railing. "I broke up with Cali. She's picked a different school to attend."
"What? Why? You guys were getting along great."
"Things change, people change."
"That fast?"
We'd only been out of touch for a few weeks. But, then again, look at the huge news
I got in those few weeks.
"We had a scare," he said. "And that put things into perspective for us."
"A pregnancy scare?" I swallowed hard. "But, she's not?" For just a second, I almost wished she were pregnant. Misery loves company, and all that. How screwed up
can you get, Jocelyn?
"No, she was just late," he said, relief evident in his tone. "But we realized while we liked one another and had fun with each other, we weren't so sure we were in this for the long haul. A baby would have changed everything."
Tell me about it.
"No doubt," I said, knowing exactly where he was coming from. I had spent many sleepless nights these past few weeks, trying to decide if I was what Alex wanted.
I knew we liked each other, but did he want to be tied to me forever? The more time I had to get used to having a baby, the more I wanted to share this with Alex. I wanted him to be involved and tell me it would all work out. "Sorry I wasn't around for that."
"Yeah, you kinda flaked on me," he said, but his smile took the sting from his words. "But luckily your other half was there to talk to me."
"Alex?"
"Who else?"
"What was his take on the whole situation?" I was curious to know. Maybe it would help me get my act together.
"He was very supportive when we didn't know for sure," he said. "He called me like three times a day to make sure I was okay and to see if I needed to talk things through."
"That's Alex." I smiled, wishing I could call him and tell him my current situation.
"But once we knew for sure Cali wasn't pregnant, Alex agreed we were too young and had our whole lives in front of us, and if we weren't sure we wanted to spend forever together, it was best to break up and do what was right for each other."
"Oh." I suffered a pang of disappointment. "Alex didn't think you were meant for Cali?"
"He said we had time to figure it out, and if it was meant to be, it would happen.
We didn't need a baby to complicate matters."
"No, I guess not," I said. Complicate matters? Is that how Alex would view this? A
complication?
"It all worked out." He sighed. "But I would have done the right thing and supported Cali any way she needed me to. Alex was adamant about that. Responsibility and all."
A complication and a responsibility? This is not looking good.
"Hey." He took my hand. "It's over, and I'm moving on. There'll be lots of new girls for me to charm the pants off at school." He winked.
"Pig!" I laughed, despite my growing melancholy.
"Well, I can't have you. You're taken."
I smiled. "You didn't want me before Alex came home."
"Maybe I didn't realize what a catch you were," he said.
"Please." I rolled my eyes. "It would never have worked."
"Come on." He pulled me toward the door. "My mother is waiting for you."
"Good. I've missed miss her too." We walked into the house.
I didn't know why, but I immediately felt at home once I got inside.
Probably because everywhere I looked I was reminded of Alex and all the time we spent there.
I liked being surrounded by him, and I wanted to take it all in, since this was probably the last time I'd be there until he came home.