Chapter 20
Suzanne lay sprawled out on her bed, naked, wondering what the hell Jen was doing in the bathroom. Was she having some kind of performance anxiety because of recent events…was she backing out of this? God, Suzanne hoped not. Walking back from the restaurant with Jen only had Suzanne anticipating what the rest of their evening together would involve. Did she want to reconnect with Jen? More than anything in the world right now. But if Jen was having second thoughts, she needed her to communicate that.
In this moment, Suzanne craved her touch.
The bathroom door opened, and Jen wore an oversized hoodie that came down to the middle of her thighs. It certainly hadn’t been what she wore to dinner. Why had she changed? “So, um…before we broke up, I kinda left some things here that I hadn’t mentioned to you before.”
Suzanne sat up on her elbows, her brows drawn. “What things?”
“Fun things.” Jen simpered as she crossed the room and crawled across the bed. When she settled between Suzanne’s legs, Suzanne sat up and draped her arms over Jen’s shoulders. “You may not be into it, and that’s absolutely fine, but?—”
Suzanne silenced Jen with a kiss. One that hopefully reminded Jen of what they’d shared prior to the messy weeks they spent without one another. When Jen moaned into Suzanne’s mouth, her hand fisted in Suzanne’s hair, her heart settled. Jen wasn’t backing out of anything tonight. That much was clear.
Jen drew back and touched her forehead to Suzanne’s. They gazed back at one another, Jen’s thumb stroking Suzanne’s cheek, her warm breath tickling Suzanne’s lips. “Those weeks without you were tough for me. I never want us to be in that position again.” Jen stole another kiss. “This is the position I’d rather be in with you. Right here, okay?”
Suzanne nodded as she smiled. “This is where I want to be, too.”
“About those things I mentioned,” Jen said as she shifted back a little. She took the hem of the hoodie in her hands and lifted it over her head to expose the strap-on she wore. “Is it something you could be into?”
Every last emotion Suzanne possessed tore through her at the speed of light. Just seeing Jen like this, entirely naked except for the harness around her waist… Oh, she was into it. She was into everything Jen threw at her. “Oh, my.” Jen visibly swallowed when Suzanne took hold of the length, her other hand sitting on Jen’s thigh. “I have a feeling you know exactly what you’re doing with this.”
“Maybe.” Jen took her bottom lip between her teeth.
“Then you should show me the fun I’ve been missing.” Suzanne lay back and allowed her legs to fall open. Jen ghosted the back of her hand over Suzanne’s pussy, her back arching from the bed when she moaned. “Oh, Jen.”
Jen made herself comfortable between Suzanne’s thighs, spreading her lips as she dipped her head and stroked the flat of her tongue over Suzanne’s clit.
Suzanne lifted her hips, aware that she was already wet, needing more from Jen. When Jen sucked her clit into her mouth, it took everything within Suzanne not to fuck her face. God, she loved to experience new things with this woman. “S-shit, baby.” Suzanne did reach out this time, gripping the back of Jen’s head when she sucked harder. “Oh, fuck. Yes.”
“I’ve missed tasting you,” Jen whispered as she drew back and replaced her tongue with her thumb. “You’re so beautiful.”
Now wasn’t the time for blushing, but Suzanne felt her cheeks heat regardless. Jen always had a way of making Suzanne feel as though she was the very centre of her universe. She hoped that would never change.
“And I just…I need to be inside you, babe.” Jen slid a finger inside Suzanne, her stare pinning Suzanne to the bed as she looked back at her. And then Jen smirked when Suzanne tightened around the second finger she added. “You’re close.”
“I’ve been thinking about you since the moment we sat down at dinner.”
Jen cocked her head. “Well, you should have said. I’d have left dessert and the walk and brought you right back here the moment we were done.”
Suzanne lowered her hand and spread her lips further. “Am I wet enough for you, baby?”
Jen lowered her gaze and moaned. “Fuck, yes. You’re soaking.” That was only confirmed when Jen sunk deeper, and the sound of Suzanne’s wetness floated around the silence of the room. “You feel incredible.”
Suzanne buried her head in the pillow beneath her, two fingertips rolling over her clit while Jen took care of everything else. “Give me more.”
Jen eased a third finger inside, urging Suzanne towards her first orgasm. Jen had that look in her eyes that reminded Suzanne of the kind of night they were in for. When she dipped her head again, taking over from Suzanne and replacing her fingers with her tongue, Suzanne buried the heels of her feet into the bed. “That’s it, babe. Come for me.”
Those words hurried Suzanne towards the peak. She tugged at one of her taut nipples, relaxed her body, and came against Jen’s tongue. Jen slowed, but she didn’t stop. She coaxed everything she could from Suzanne, moaning and lapping up her arousal. “F-fuck, Jen.” Suzanne brought a hand to her forehead and came down from the high she felt coursing through her body, excitement building all over again when she felt the bed dip between her legs. She looked up when Jen positioned herself, coating the toy with Suzanne’s wetness as she teased it between her lips. “Oh, God.”
“It’s always far more intense if I fuck you after you’ve just come.”
Jen’s confidence, the way she said that as she locked eyes with Suzanne, yeah…she needed this woman back inside her right now. She didn’t want to come down from what she was feeling. Sheer bliss.
As Jen braced herself on either side of Suzanne, she took a nipple into her mouth, allowing the toy to tease her clit. Between the sensation of Jen’s mouth on her, and the toy shifting lower and towards her entrance, Suzanne was just about ready to lose her mind. Jen looked back at Suzanne with hooded eyes, her breath washing over her nipple, and said, “Are you ready for me?”
Suzanne could only nod. The intensity of Jen’s gaze was too much to take.
Jen brought one hand between them and took a hold of the toy. When she pushed the tip inside Suzanne, Suzanne’s mouth fell open, and her breath caught in her throat.
“Feeling okay?”
Suzanne wrapped a hand around the back of Jen’s neck and brought that delicious mouth closer. “Oh, I’m feeling far more than okay.” She drew Jen into a kiss and slid her tongue into her mouth when Jen eased further inside her. Fuck, Suzanne couldn’t describe the way she was feeling. All she knew was that these were the moments she would always remember. No matter what. “Y-yes. More.”
Jen pulled back a little, only to push deeper as she thrust her hips. Mm, that’s more like it. Suzanne grinned when she took the entire length of the toy, her hands wrapped around the muscles in Jen’s arms. “Suzanne, fuck!”
“Fuck me harder.” Suzanne met every thrust from Jen. She understood that Jen was likely wary about hurting her, but she could handle her. Oh, she could handle so much more. Suzanne brought her lips to Jen’s ear and whispered, “Go on. Show me what you’ve really got.”
Jen’s arms wobbled at that, something flickering in her eyes as she looked down at Suzanne. She lifted a brow and smiled. “You’re fucking filthy.”
“You wouldn’t have me any other way.” Suzanne flipped them suddenly, straddling Jen and enjoying that feeling of being full. She lifted, then sunk down onto the toy. Jen lay there, mesmerised, her own throaty moan mingled with Suzanne’s panting as Suzanne reached out and teased her nipples. She threw her head back and rode Jen, scratching her nails down Jen’s stomach. “Oh, baby. That feels so fucking good.”
As Jen’s breath hitched, Suzanne knew the base of the toy was rubbing against her clit. Her face contorted as Jen gripped the cover beneath them. It was important to Suzanne that Jen also got the most out of this moment. “B-babe.”
“You really thought I’d be the one having all the fun?” Suzanne angled her head when Jen looked back at her. She rocked back and forth, her orgasm fiercely approaching, unable to comprehend being in this position with anyone else. Jen was it for her. No doubt about it. “Are you close?”
“S-so fucking close.”
Suzanne lowered her hand, pressed her fingers to her clit, and rode Jen harder and faster. “T-together, okay?”
Jen held onto Suzanne’s hips, forcing her harder against her, and cried out into the room. “C-coming. Shit, babe. Oh, fuck, I’m coming.”
Suzanne toppled over the edge, whimpering as she continued to enjoy the toy buried inside her. She had no idea Jen had this kind of evening up her sleeve, but she expected so many more of them. “Oh, Jen.” She slowed, slumped forward, pressed her body to Jen’s, and buried her face in the crook of Jen’s neck. “Baby, that was?—”
“Just the beginning.” Jen flipped them again, eased out of Suzanne, and crawled back on the bed. “Turn around. I want to fuck you from behind.”
It was in that moment that Suzanne truly knew she could never risk losing Jen again. This life they were building together simply had to be their future. Nothing else was acceptable.
Jen crept up behind Suzanne, where she stood at the kitchen island, wrapping her arms around her waist as she did so. Suzanne always felt soft and warm in the morning, her unblemished skin just begging for Jen’s lips. She smiled against the back of her neck, dropping slow, wet kisses along her shoulder as Jen pulled her silk robe away from her skin. “Mm. Morning, babe.”
Suzanne arched her back when Jen slid a hand inside her robe and dragged her nails along her stomach. “You just don’t know when to stop, do you?” Suzanne moaned when Jen dipped lower. “Fuck, I’ve missed you.”
“Not as much as I’ve missed you.” Jen took her bottom lip between her teeth as she rested her chin on Suzanne’s shoulder. Her hand wandered between Suzanne’s thighs, spreading her lips without a second thought. There was something incredibly rewarding about teasing this woman. “Because I did. I missed you so fucking much.”
The knife Suzanne had been cutting fruit with clattered to the counter, and then she turned in Jen’s arms, those beautiful eyes so soft this morning. “Never again, okay? I never want to imagine a single day without you again, let alone weeks.”
“After last night, you’re stuck with me forever.” Jen smirked as she trailed her tongue across Suzanne’s bottom lip. “Who knew you could take a strap so fucking well?” Thank God she’d had what she needed to hand last night. The result had been fucking mind-blowing!
“Only because you were the one giving it to me,” Suzanne whispered against Jen’s lips. “And I expect more of it.”
“Anytime, babe. It would be my pleasure.” Jen wanted to continue their antics into this morning, but she was starving. They’d both crashed in the end last night, meaning no snacks had been consumed. Jen was quite partial to a snack when she’d rocked another woman’s world. “What’s for breakfast?”
“You, hopefully.” Suzanne nipped at Jen’s bottom lip. “I didn’t get enough of you last night.”
“Can we eat first? I swear my stomach is going to get angry in the next thirty seconds.” Jen felt it rumble, but thankfully, it was silent for the time being. “It’s just given me a warning.”
“Someone worked up quite the appetite.” Suzanne tweaked Jen’s nose as she turned her back and finished making breakfast. “Sit down. I’ll bring it over.”
“Nah. Let me help.” Jen stepped up beside Suzanne and awaited further instruction. “Where do you want me?”
“Out of my kitchen and at the dining table,” Suzanne said as she side-eyed Jen. “I’m sorry, but I can’t concentrate when you’re standing so close to me.”
Jen nodded, turning her back and puffing out her chest with pride. She made Suzanne weak in the knees, and that was absolutely fine by Jen. It meant the hot and steamy moments were far more exciting. “Coffee?”
“It’s on the table. Help yourself.”
As Jen scanned the table, bits and pieces already sitting in place, her phone started to ring on the coffee table in the living room. “Sorry, babe. I’ll just get that. It’s probably Mum.”
Jen lifted her phone, frowning when she didn’t recognise the number on the screen. “Hello?”
“Jen! Hey!”
“Um, hi. Who is this?”
“It’s Lizzie.”
Oh, shit. She had completely forgotten to add Lizzie’s number to her phone last night. Jen was planning to text her once she knew she had a spare few hours. Though, judging by last night, she planned to use all those spare hours watching Suzanne beneath her. “Oh, hey. How are you?”
“Great! It was so good seeing you at the restaurant. Chloe and Mel said you look great.” Lizzie cleared her throat. “So, I was wondering about that catch-up we mentioned last night.”
“Yeah, uh…” Jen scratched at the back of her neck, looking over her shoulder and towards the kitchen. “I’m not really sure when I’m going to be available at the moment. I’m kinda tied up with Suzanne.”
“O-oh. Right, yeah.”
“It’s all kinda new and exciting. You know what I mean?”
Lizzie laughed. “What you mean is, you’re getting fucked left, right, and centre. Got it!”
Jen winced. Lizzie didn’t need to word it like that. “Well, no. I just meant that we’re spending a lot of time with one another, and with me working all week, I prefer to be with her. While I can, you know.”
“I get that. It would be nice to catch up, though. Even just for a quick coffee.”
Jen could afford Lizzie that. Actually, it was the least she could do after everything she’d put her through. “You’re right. Let’s arrange something. Find out when Mel and Chloe are available and send me a text.”
“Perfect. I’ll be in touch, okay?”
“Sure. Take it easy, Lizzie. Good talking to you again.” Jen ended the call and threw her phone onto the couch. When she turned around, Suzanne was watching her from the dining table. “That was just Lizzie.”
“That’s nice.” Suzanne smiled, but Jen knew it was fake. Lizzie being around bothered Suzanne, but Jen didn’t want it to be that way. Everyone would have to learn to live in harmony down the line. “So, are you ready for breakfast or did you need to leave?”
“Leave?” Jen snorted as she stalked towards Suzanne. “You think I’ve got any plans to leave?”
Suzanne busied herself as she placed various foods down on the dining table, but Jen took her hand and turned Suzanne to her. “Jen.”
“Do I have to bend you over this table right now and show you what you do to me?” Jen felt Suzanne tremble as she sat a hand on her hip. “Do I need to drop to my knees and taste you while you enjoy breakfast?”
“J-Jen.”
“No. We’re not doing this whole jealousy thing. Lizzie was a different lifetime for me. She was part of a past I never want to remember or relive. This, right now…my life right now, is about you. Us. That’s not going to change.”
Suzanne nodded slowly as she took a step back and motioned towards the table. “Breakfast is ready.” Then she cleared her throat. “And for the record, I’m not jealous.”
Jen sighed as she followed Suzanne to the table. She wasn’t convinced that Suzanne was okay with Lizzie being around, but she also didn’t know how to show or how to promise Suzanne that there was nothing still there for Lizzie in her heart. God, she couldn’t even remember the last time she’d thought about her ex. Probably while she was in prison, and likely only because Jen was punishing herself about those she’d hurt in the process. Other than that, she rarely thought about Lizzie or any other exes for that matter.
Silently placing different items of food onto her plate, Jen glanced up at Suzanne. “No matter what happens, I don’t plan to have a full-blown friendship with her.”
“If you believe a friendship would be beneficial, then please, don’t let me stop you.” Suzanne tucked into breakfast. “So long as I still get to spend some time with you, then you should see friends. It’s important that you reconnect with people.”
That was the thing, though. Jen didn’t want to reconnect with people from the past. As a friendly face in the street, sure, but that was the extent of those friendships. When she was ready to, Jen would find new friends. People who hadn’t seen her at her worst. “You know I love you, right?”
Suzanne looked up at Jen and frowned. “I know.”
“But do you? Because we’ve both said it, but it was said potentially in the heat of the moment.” Jen didn’t need to prove anything to anyone, but she did need Suzanne to understand what she was saying. “It was said when we weren’t even together anymore.”
“I still meant it.”
“And so did I.” Jen dipped her head and smiled back at Suzanne. “I’m finding that I mean it a whole lot more this morning, though.”
“Why?”
“Because we had the perfect night with one another. Dinner was amazing; you were exceptional. I have everything I could need now that we’re back together, babe. Everything.”
“That means a lot to hear you say that.” Suzanne regarded Jen with the most astonishing smile. “I just want to make you happy, Jen.”
Jen shifted her seat closer and stroked the back of her hand against Suzanne’s cheek as she smiled. “You do. Believe me.” Jen turned her attention back to the delicious food on her plate. “Now, eat up. Because I’m going to spend all morning making love to you…and then I’m taking you out for a late lunch.”
“You…are?”
“Mmhmm. Today is all about us. Tonight, too.” Jen shoved a forkful of scrambled eggs into her mouth and winked. “You make the best breakfast.”
“I love you,” Suzanne said, her voice breaking as she gazed back at Jen. “And I’m going to make sure you know it every single day.”
“I love you too, babe.”