CHAPTER FIVE #2
Next, it’s Chris who steps up and begins his reading. “Do not stand at my grave and weep—” as the curtain slowly closes.
“No. Tell them to stop.” Angie’s guttural sob echoes around the room. Until this point, she’s kept her composure, but it looks as if reality is sinking in.
“It’s okay, Angie,” Ash says. He tries to help, and Calla’s arm goes around her shoulders, but Angie breaks free.
“No, no, no. It’s not okay.” She steps towards the curtain. “They can’t take him away,” Angie cries.
Heads turn to one another with worried faces, deep mumbles fill the room, and I exchange a glance with the other guys for guidance. It’s fucking hard to watch her suffer.
Calla sobs against Ash’s chest while he looks helplessly towards his sister-in-law. He’s torn between holding his wife, comforting Angie, and dealing with his own grief.
Ash’s mum stands in the aisle in front. She looks over her shoulder, catching sight of our familiar faces, and her panicked eyes fall on us with relief. “Tommy, Max, can you help me take care of her, please?”
I look at Max, and I won’t deny he’s looking a little panicked. What the hell am I meant to do? I’m not the right person for this, but I can’t let the family down, and I can’t stand seeing Angie suffer anymore. Something like adrenaline surges through me as I follow Ash’s mum to the front.
“Can we stop for a minute,” I shout and raise my hand as Angie falls in a heap in front of the closed curtain. Thank God someone in this place heard me, and I receive a nod from Chris that it’s done.
I place my arm around Angie’s shoulders while Mrs C rubs her back.
Her wide, tear-filled eyes look up to mine with horror.
Fuck. What if I’m the last person she wants to see?
Will she think I’m butting in on something that has nothing to do with me?
I don’t want to upset her, but I also have to try and help.
“Angie?” I try to guide her away, but she continues to sob.
“Please don’t let them take him.” As I look into her eyes, the horror I saw turns into desperation.
“You’ve got to let him go, love,” Mrs C tries to reason with her, but Angie isn’t listening. Her eyes are practically pleading with me now. What the hell do I do?
“Angie. It’s okay. Come and sit down.” I’m trying to soothe her pain, but I’m pretty positive nothing I say will make her feel better.
“Tommy.” She grabs my jacket, her slight frame falling against my chest. She clings to me with every ounce of strength she has.
Her face is wet with tears as she pleads, “Help me. They want to take Scott away. They want my love, but I’m not ready.
I don’t want to say goodbye.” Her tear-stained face continues to look up to me.
“How can I live without him?” her voice croaks.
“I know, babe. I know.” My throat is hoarse with emotion as I struggle to speak.
“Nobody understands,” she says through her tears.
Angie is falling apart in front of me. She is fucking desperate to be heard and I seem to be the only one who is listening. I have to give her what she wants.
Then an idea comes to mind. I’m not sure if it’s right or even possible, but I’m willing to do anything to help.
“Angie, listen to me. Why don’t we sit down and let everyone else leave?” Mrs C’s wide eyes meet mine, so I mouth, “Trust me.”
Her lips purse together in a straight-lined smile and she nods.
“Scott is not going anywhere until you’re ready, okay?” I reassure Angie.
Her eyes look right into mine once more, but this time, with hope. “Thank you. I just need him to stay with me a little while longer.”
I can’t stomach her pain. “We can make them wait, Angie. Promise.” It’s a relief to witness her agony subside slightly.
“Mrs C, can you help me get her sat down again?” I ask in a lower tone.
“Of course, love.”
“I need to talk to some people and let them know what we’re doing,” I explain to Angie, leading her back to her chair.
“Thank you, Tommy. Thank you both.” She sobs, and when I take her fully in my arms to steady her forward, I notice how weak she’s become. I doubt she’s eaten a damn thing in recent days.
The officiant gives me a strange look as silence falls across the room. Once I have Angie settled, I head over to speak to her.
“Who do I talk to about delaying the cremation for a while?” I ask.
“I don’t think that will be possible, sir.”
“Let me try, at least. Please, can you help?”
Her head tilts to the side. “Well, you could talk to the funeral director. He’s just outside those doors.”
“Thank you.” I head over and tell Ash quietly what I’m doing and ask Bernie if he can sort out some music during the pause.
I rush out and see four men standing by the hearse in black suits. One of them has to be the right guy.
“Excuse me. Is one of you the funeral director for the Knox funeral?”
“I am, sir. How can I help?” A tall, older dude steps forward. His black suit is sharp, and his grey hair is neat and perfectly slicked back. He looks efficient, like a guy you can rely on. I hope to God I can.
“We need to delay the cremation and keep the room for a while.”
His face is ashen. “What do you mean?”
“Angie—Mrs Knox—hasn’t said all her goodbyes, so the cremation has to wait until she’s ready.”
“I’m so sorry, but we can’t use the chapel for longer than the allocated time.”
I scratch my forehead. “Why not?”
“There’s another cremation in forty-five minutes. We must clear the room.”
Not good enough. “Look, I don’t care what you have to do, but Mrs Knox is in bits. She’s lost the love of her life and is fucking devastated. She needs time.”
“I’m sorry, sir—”
“Tell me what you need. I’ll pay for the other family to have their funeral elsewhere, whatever it takes. Just please let us have that room.”
“Look, sir, I’m truly sorry, but I’m not in a position to offer an extension on the chapel here at the crematorium.
However, I can offer to move Mr Knox back to the funeral home and into our chapel of rest there.
That way, Mrs Knox can have the time she needs and we could arrange a private cremation at a later date. Would that help?”
I exhale my relief. “That would be amazing… sorry, I didn’t get your name.”
“Joseph, sir.”
“Joseph, you’re a gentleman. Thank you.”
“We’ll arrange it now, sir, but we will have to arrange another appointment for Mr Knox to be cremated as soon as possible. Perhaps I could call the family later in the day?”
“Yeah, I’ll let Ash—Mr Chambers—know.”
“Thank you, sir. I’d appreciate it.”
He signals to one of the other guys, while I run back into the chapel and let Ash and Calla know what’s happening. I just hope I’m doing the right thing.