Chapter 4
After eating, Paisley insisted on cleaning up while Kydrick relaxed, but she should have known better. Kydrick was not raised to sit back and watch a woman take such good care of him and not lift a finger to help. That was how he felt while he was locked down. He saw Paisley bending over backward for him while the most he could do was spend his commissary money that she and her family gave him to outsource gifts on holidays. He wrote her letters and talked to her on the phone, but that was the absolute most he could do while he was away.
Things would be very different now. His main goal was to get his life in order and work on letting go of all the pent up anger simmering just beneath the surface for him. His immediate second goal was to make Paisley happy.
For him, things felt complicated given their past. He had been so hurt when Janelle left him for someone else. And not just someone else, but someone she went on to marry. That was supposed to be them with the nice house and two children, and there wasn’t anything he could do about it in his situation. Frustration was an everyday feeling for him, but Paisley… she made it better— easier. Somewhere along the line, his mind shifted from anger and pain toward Janelle to unyielding love for Paisley. He wasn’t sure yet if it was romantic love or not, but he knew there was nobody on this Earth left he loved more than her.
The thought of exploring those feelings scared him, though. It felt wrong to look at her that way because of Janelle. No matter how wrong she did him, neither he nor Paisley were the kind of people to get caught up in a situation like that. He felt like he had to play catch up, so though he wanted to make Paisley happy, he wasn’t sure he could in that way. Not right now, at least. As a man, he felt the immediate urge to get on his feet and provide for himself before he could think about dating. He also felt like Paisley needed to spend some time living her life outside of him.
While all that was true, his probing about her having a man earlier sent a painful shot straight through his heart. Now that he was on the outside, he wasn’t sure how he would deal with her dating another man.
“I think that’s it,” Paisley said, looking around the kitchen to make sure they’d put everything away and washed the few dishes they used.
Her eyes finally landed on him, causing warmth to spread through his body. He hadn’t felt warmth in a very long time, and it made him feel good. If he wasn’t careful, he’d get addicted to the feeling.
“What do you want to do now?”
There was no question what he wanted to do.
“Honestly? I really just want to chill. Watch some movies, sleep, eat some more leftovers, and repeat.”
Paisley beamed, causing Kydrick’s heart to stutter. He didn’t know what he said to make her smile at him like that, but he felt a tug to say it repeatedly just to stay in that moment.
“That sounds perfect. The day is yours. Whatever you want to do is fine with me. Do you think you’ll be up for family dinner tomorrow though? You know my mom is making a big fuss about it.”
It was Kydrick’s turn to smile. He felt himself warming back up to that facial expression. There hadn’t been much to smile about for a very long time, but just a couple of hours in Paisley’s presence changed that. Today, he felt grateful, and smiling felt more natural to him than it had for years, but underneath that, he still felt anger. Anger at so many things. Everything he missed, the false accusations, the justice system… He wondered if that would ever go away or if he would be stuck wearing that emotion like a dishonorable badge for the rest of his life.
His smiled faded pretty quickly, though. He had envisioned reuniting with his people so many times, but the pain of not having his parents there, nobody of his own blood, cut him deeply. Losing his father while locked up almost took him out. He crashed out bad and had to spend some time in solitary. Living life as a free man had the potential to cause another crash out because it reopened wounds he had only been able to partially heal while on the inside.
Tackling his first family get together without his parents wouldn’t be easy, but he had prepared himself for this. He couldn’t distance himself from the only people on the planet that he had left. If anyone understood how precious time was, it was him, so he found himself nodding at Paisley and thanking God that he had a full day to get his mind right.
“Yeah, that’s cool.”
As if she could feel every one of his emotions, she took a couple of steps to cover the space between them and placed her small hands into his large ones.
“Come on. Let’s get comfy on the couch.”
Just like that, his smile returned. They walked into the living room. While Kydrick sat on the large sectional, she gathered her favorite blankets and tossed them over him before sitting beside him with the remote.
“What do you want to watch?”
“Shit, I don’t even know. Put me on to a new show. I know you and Nelle used to be delirious over your little shows. What you been watching lately?”
The mention of Janelle caused Paisley to tense. He hadn’t meant for her name to come out so casually. He didn’t even like speaking about her, but his brain automatically correlated the free world with Janelle and Paisley. They were who he spent all his time with before. He knew it would take some rewiring to get out of that mindset. He just hoped Paisley would be patient with him.
The moment passed, and Paisley offered him a small smile before saying, “I think you’ll love Bridgerton .”
Kydrick, not knowing what that was, shrugged and got comfortable, leaning back and watching as she turned on the TV and navigated to Netflix. Once the show started, he pulled her into him, yearning for the warmth she brought to his cold exterior, and she melted right into him.
That was exactly how they stayed for the rest of the day.
Kydrick woke with a start, looking around and wondering what pulled him from such a deep sleep. When he finally remembered where he was, he relaxed, realizing he was safe. To fall into such a deep sleep in prison always left him unsettled when he woke up. He always felt the need to stay alert and sleep as lightly as possible, but his body couldn’t help the natural reaction to feeling safe, secure, and comfortable for the first time in twelve years, and he has slept like a rock without even meaning to.
He and Paisley binge watched all of season one of Bridgerton and half of season two. When they first started it, he wasn’t sure he would like it, but how wrong he was. He ate that shit up and couldn’t wait to watch more with Paisley. Hopefully, they would later that night.
Today, they planned to set some things in motion for him. Apparently, his lawyer, who also happened to be Paisley’s boss, wanted to meet with him. After that, he wanted to go shopping with the bit of leftover commissary money he had. He needed to get a phone, a bank account, his license… the errands of the day seemed endless but necessary. After that, they would go to Paisley’s folks’ house.
Nerves piled up in his stomach as he thought about everything that needed to be done, but when he glanced down at his chest, he calmed. Paisley’s big ol’ head and mass of hair seemed to take up his entire torso. She snuggled up to him and seemed to be sleeping peacefully, but judging by the light coming in through the blinds, he could tell it was well into the morning, and they needed to get going.
It hadn’t even been their intention to fall asleep on the couch, but they had, and he wasn’t even mad at it. Although he had learned to appreciate being in solitude, he couldn’t deny that having Paisley laid up on him felt good.
After smoothing her sloppy ponytail from her face, Kydrick rubbed her back, waiting patiently for her to wake up. After a few seconds, she stirred and groaned, attempting to roll over, but Kydrick stopped her, holding her in place so she didn’t fall off the couch.
“Come on, Pooh. Time to get up.”
Her eyes popped open, and he noticed it took her a moment to gather her bearings just as it had for him. When she slowly lifted her head to look at him, he didn’t miss the deep blush that settled on her cheeks.
“We fell asleep.”
He loved that she stated the obvious. She only did that when she was nervous and couldn’t think of anything else to say. He nodded, still peering into her eyes.
“Best sleep I’ve had in a long time.”
“Me too,” she admitted before sitting up slowly and stretching. She reached for her phone and checked the time. “Shit. It’s almost ten. We should definitely get going.” She turned to him with a smile. “You ready for today?”
“I’m ready to get my life back on track.”
She ran a hand down his muscled arm.
“We’re gonna get you together, Kyd.” After a moment, she added, “You know Janelle and her parents will likely be at dinner tonight.”
He stilled. It was his turn to feel a way about Paisley bringing Janelle up in such a casual manner. He nodded slowly.
“I figured she might.”
“Are you okay with that? I can ask my mom to uninvite them.”
“You’ve had to go through dinners and shit with her over the years?” Kydrick asked.
It was another thing they never talked about. Paisley had never really opened up to him about her falling out with Janelle, and he never asked. Not because he didn’t want to know, but because he didn’t want the confirmation that he was in the middle of it. It was yet another thing they would have to talk about when the time was right. For now, he just wanted to focus on getting through the day.
“Unfortunately,” she mumbled. “I adore her parents, but her…”
Her words trailed off, and he reached out and pinched her cheek. “If you can do it, then so can I. I do want to see her parents. If she wants to make things weird and show up, then that’s on her.”
“Trust me. She will be there. She’s made it a point to try asking about you over the years.”
That didn’t surprise him. Janelle had sent him letters through the years. He always read them but never responded. They were nothing but apologies to ease her guilty conscience, and Kydrick couldn’t find the words to explain that her apologies did nothing for the abandonment, betrayal, and pain he’d suffered because of her.
They sat in silence for a moment before Kydrick stood and stretched, discreetly adjusting his morning wood before turning for the stairs. “I’m going to shower, and then I’ll be ready. I really want to try to get everything done today if I can, so tomorrow, I can start focusing on finding a job.”
“Oh, I forgot to tell you,” Paisley said, hopping off the couch. “In all the excitement and planning surrounding your release, it completely slipped my mind. You know the nonprofit organization I started a few years ago?”
Kydrick nodded slowly. “The one that helps people who just got out of prison?”
Her smile was automatic. He knew how proud she was of that organization. Kydrick was touched when she told him about it, and he always made a point to ask about the growth since she opened it. Paisley had no idea how in awe Kydrick was of her. She gave so much of herself to others, and it made him want to pour into her even more.
She nodded with a sly smile. “You have a position waiting for you as a counselor there. It’s yours for as long as you want it. The pay is decent, and it can help you while you figure out what you want to do. It’s something to put some money in your pockets while you figure everything else out.”
Kydrick stared at her, emotion building inside him. She had literally thought of everything for him. He still had so much to figure out. Before going to prison, he had been in school to become an EMT. Since his record was completely wiped clean, that was now an option for him again. He’d been thinking about reapplying to school for that, but he knew that would take time and he would need something to put money in his pockets in the meantime. Paisley just made that transition ten times easier for him. The only thing was, he had no clue how to be a counselor, especially not to people just getting out of prison. Hell, he was in the same boat as them, so what gave him the right to give them pointers on what to do when he didn’t even know himself?
He shrugged the thoughts away and focused on one day at a time. Walking up to Paisley, he dwarfed her with his size before pulling her into him. He had the sudden urge to kiss her as he looked down into her golden eyes.
Instead of kissing her on her soft lips, he kissed her cheek and said, “Thank you, Pooh. Seriously. I’m not sure I have what it takes for that position, but can we talk about it tomorrow? I really want to sort through some of this other stuff first.”
“Of course, but for the record, I know you’re perfect for the job.”
In response, he squeezed her tighter before pulling away and walking toward the stairs, ready to work his way through this day one step at a time.
“This is where you work?” Kydrick asked as they walked into a fancy building where people in suits holding briefcases whizzed by, all looking like they were late for a meeting or something.
Paisley’s skin took on that familiar red hue as she nodded shyly. “Yeah. This is the place I spend most of my time.”
“Shit is fancy,” he mumbled, looking around and feeling like he didn’t fit in.
The fresh cut he got earlier had him feeling like a million bucks, but even that feeling seemed to dull once he stepped foot into the law firm. Glancing down at his sweats and hoodie, he felt way too under dressed to step foot in there. Even Paisley looked like she fit in, though she only wore leggings and a hoodie that cut off and showed off her mid section.
He couldn’t help but look at her throughout their busy day. While he got his hair lined, he watched her from the barber’s chair as she scrolled on her phone, oblivious to all the men vying for her attention. At the mall, he watched the way she walked so confident but also so unaware of how she affected the people around her, especially the men. When they shopped for his new phone, he watched while she interacted with the salesman completely unaware that the nigga was trying to sell himself to her more than the phone.
She was gorgeous, and he knew he looked good, but he also knew he had nothing to his name other than the things she had bought him and the little bit he bought himself that day. He had nothing to offer a woman like Paisley at that juncture in his life other than his friendship, and for her, that friendship was the most valuable thing she could have from him. Nobody else could have a friendship from him on the level that she had. He wouldn’t leave her side until death claimed him, and even then, he would still pledge himself to her in the afterlife and in any lifetime they were blessed enough to meet again.
While on the elevator, Paisley checked the time on her diamond-studded watch. “It’s almost time for us to head to dinner. I was hoping I would have time to go home and change, but I don’t think we will.”
Kydrick pulled her hand toward him, ignoring her statement and eyeing the watch. “This is cold. I really like that.”
“Thanks,” she uttered. “It was a part of an exclusive collection. It’s one of my favorite watches.”
“Yeah? How many you got by now? A hundred?”
Paisley giggled. “Not a hundred… yet. I do have a solid collection, but not as big as my earring collection.”
“You’ll have to show me later. What ever happened to becoming the next Vera Wang?”
Paisley snorted. “Vera Wang isn’t known for jewelry, Kyd. I mean, she has jewelry, but she’s more known for wedding dresses.”
They walked off the elevator, and Kydrick put his arm around her shoulder. “Whatever, man. You know what I mean. You were supposed to become the next big jewelry designer and make me a chain. You promised, remember?”
She giggled. “I do now. I honestly forgot about promising to design you a chain. Feels like a lifetime ago.”
Kydrick noticed her eyes go hallow as she looked around the office as if she despised the place, but before he could say anything, she said, “Here’s Steven’s office.”
She knocked, and a moment later, Steven called out, “Come in.”
Paisley pushed the door open, and Kydrick followed behind her, allowing him to see over her head. The first thing he saw was Steven and the way his eyes zeroed in on Paisley. Kydrick’s face immediately frowned up.
He had met Steven a few years ago when Paisley started at his firm. Since this law firm took over his case, he’d never met with Steven and Paisley in the same room. In the courtroom, they kept things professional, but the way Steven looked at her now had him wondering if something was going on between his Pooh and her boss.
“Paisley, I’m glad you could come today. With you taking the week off, I thought maybe you would wait to stop by. I was glad when I got your call earlier,” Steven said from his seat behind his L-shaped desk.
“You asked me to come with Kydrick,” Paisley said, confusion evident in her tone.
Steven’s brows pulled in slightly. So slight that a normal person wouldn’t have caught it. Kydrick wasn’t normal, though. After twelve years in prison, he learned to pay attention to not only his surroundings but people’s body language.
When Steven’s eyes finally met Kydrick’s, almost as if he hadn’t even noticed him standing behind Paisley, he knew what was up. Steven had eyes for Paisley only and had most likely used Kydrick to get her there just so he could lay eyes on her.
Kydrick chuckled and shook his head while Steven stood and walked over to them, standing a little too close to Paisley for his liking. When Steven stuck his hand out for Kydrick to shake, Kydrick decided to play nice while discreetly moving Paisley away from him.
“Kydrick Sutherland, it’s good to see you.”
Kydrick nodded as he shook Steven’s hand, adding a little extra pressure to the shake.
“Heard you had some things to discuss with me.”
“I do,” Steven said, turning and rounding his desk to sit down again. “I wanted to talk about your options as far as suing the two people that wrongfully convicted you as well as the state since they didn’t do their due diligence with the case. We can take this to civil court?—”
“Steven,” Paisley snapped, cutting her eyes at him.
Steven glanced at her and chuckled before looking back at Kydrick. “Sorry, man. Paisley warned me not to get into all that today. She’s really protective of you. Said you needed some time before we got into all that, but I think the best thing to do right now is to take action.”
The tension in the room felt thick, and Kydrick didn’t like it. He looked between Steven and Paisley before clearing his throat.
“I’m not going to stand here and pretend I’m some upstanding citizen who wants to forget everything and move on. I’m with all that get-back shit. I don’t even care if I get a dime out of it. The white people that put me in this situation need to pay, but Paisley is right. I need a minute to get my head on straight. Twelve years is a long time to be away, and I need some time to readjust. Is it cool if I reach out when I’m ready?”
Steven nodded slowly, steepling his fingers, and it was his turn to look between Paisley and Kydrick before a grin spread across his face.
“Very well. There is something else that can’t wait though.”
Kydrick watched as Steven pulled a thick folder out of a drawer and slid it toward him.
“What’s this?” Kydrick asked as he grabbed it and flipped it open.
“Your father’s will. He hired me as his lawyer years ago to make sure his affairs were in order in case anything happened to him. Made it very clear that when you were released, and if he wasn’t around, everything in his name should go to you.
“That’s all the paperwork there. He had about ten thousand in assets and in his accounts that are yours, and the house sold after his death. There was an amount leftover after the fees and renovations totaling another ten thousand. Your mother had a life insurance policy that was released to your father and then one that was to be released to you when you turned twenty-one. Now that you’re free, that’s yours, and your father also had one that is yours. Together, the policies are fifty thousand.
“You may have been dealt a shitty card, Sutherland, but you’re getting out on better circumstances than most. That isn’t even mentioning the fact that we are going to sue these motherfuckas for every dime they have. Every single one of them.”
“Oh my God.” Paisley’s words came out in a gasp as she placed a hand on Kydrick’s bicep, but even that didn’t ground him.
He stood there frozen in place, trying his best to process what was just said. His parents had always been hard workers, and they always gave Kydrick the best of the best. This one final deed didn’t even surprise him. It just hurt that he couldn’t thank either of them. He almost felt unworthy of so much money.
Underneath all that, though, he felt a sudden rush of relief. Now, he knew he would be able to chill for a little bit and take the time needed to figure out his next move, a luxury most people in his position didn’t have.
Looking down at Paisley, Kydrick could tell she didn’t know about any of this. Her boss must have kept the information to himself, which made sense. Client/lawyer privilege was still respected even in death, and Steven’s business on this matter was with Kydrick’s father, not him. A long time ago, Kydrick had given Steven and his team permission to discuss his case with Paisley, but this situation was different, and her surprise was genuine.
His jaw clenched before he whispered, “I need a moment.”
She nodded and then grabbed his hand, leading him out of the room. They walked down a short hall before he saw a sign for the restrooms.
“Go ahead. I’ll finish up with Steven, and then we can go. Take your time.” She gave his arm one last squeeze before he turned to go into the restroom.
Once inside, he locked the door, and then he allowed his tears to fall as he looked up at the ceiling.
“Thank you,” he whispered, praying that his parents heard him.