Chapter Thirty-One October 5 #2
“But that still means he’s going through a ton of new experiences, right?” Alex remonstrated.
“And you’re helping him explore that part of himself.”
He nodded. “And what if when he’s comfortable with all that… he decides to move on?”
Manda sank back against the cushions and stared at him in silence. “Whoa. You’re not letting him get close, just in case he finds someone else? You’re not gonna let yourself fall for him, in case he breaks your heart? That’s no way to live, Alex. It’s not fair on either of you.”
Alex bristled at the comment. “Joshua seems more than happy with the situation.”
She glared at him. “Oh really? And you know this how? He told you that, did he?”
Cold inched its way over his skin. “You’re not to say anything when you see him tomorrow. Please, Manda.”
“You think I’m gonna sit by and watch you hurt him—and yourself in the process?”
“You’re going to stay out of it, because this is no one’s business but mine and Joshua’s.” He attempted a smile. “We’re still a work in progress, right?”
Manda’s eyes were cool. “I hope whichever sap Todd married, breaks his fucking heart. Because for what he did to you? I could break his fucking neck. He’s gone, the little turd, but he sure left a legacy.
” Then she sighed. “Fine, you’re a work in progress.
But you got yourself a good man there. Don’t lose him. ”
“I don’t intend to.” Whenever Joshua was around, Alex kept a tight grip on his emotions. He didn’t want to send out mixed signals, and so far, Joshua had said nothing. Manda had nailed it—his assessment of the situation was all supposition.
But if Joshua wasn’t happy, he’d say something, wouldn’t he?
Wouldn’t he?
~ 0 ~
“So what are you working on?” Joshua asked Manda as they sat together on the couch. Alex was in the kitchen, making coffee.
Manda peered toward the kitchen, as though checking that Alex wasn’t about to appear, then leaned conspiratorially toward him. “You don’t share this with Alex, all right?”
“That would depend on why you’re keeping it a secret.”
She snickered. “If I told him, I’d never hear the last of it.” Manda smiled. “I started work on a novel.”
Joshua beamed. “That’s awesome!”
She flushed. “It’s early days. I’ve got about fifteen thousand words down, and you wouldn’t believe how long it’s taken me to get that far. I’m forever tweaking and honing it.” Manda laughed. “Trust me. It’s gonna take a load of polishing to turn this turd into a diamond.”
“So why haven’t you told Alex?”
She rolled her eyes. “Are you fucking kidding me? He’s been telling me to get off my ass and do this since I hit thirty. If I tell him now, A - he’ll be nothing but ‘I told you so’ and B - every time I call or visit, he’ll want an update.” She gave a shy smile. “I sort of want to surprise him.”
Joshua could understand that.
“I still think the two of you should have left me to my own devices this evening, while you went and had a romantic dinner somewhere.”
Joshua snickered. “Pizza Carrello’s doesn’t strike me as the kind of place for an intimate dinner.”
Manda huffed. “I wasn’t talking about pizza. I was talking about romance—candles, wine, a table for two…” She peered at him. “And don’t tell me the idea doesn’t appeal to you either. I get the feeling you’re a romantic kinda guy.”
“I’ve had my moments.” Joshua hesitated for a second or two. “I’m just not so sure Alex is all that romantic.”
Manda chuckled. “Dear Lord. The stories I could tell…” She met his gaze. “The next time you get the chance, take a peek at his DVD collection, and then tell me he isn’t a romantic at heart.”
Joshua’s heart sank. When Manda had voiced her suggestion about dinner, Alex had laughed and said they didn’t need to do that. Like it was a comical suggestion.
Maybe he just doesn’t want to be romantic with me.
“Joshua? You okay?”
He pulled himself back into the conversation. “Sorry. Must have zoned out.” It had seemed like a good idea to talk to Alex, but now? What scared Joshua most was that he wouldn’t like the answers.
“Coffee.” Alex came into the room carrying a tray. “So, should my ears be burning? You two have been awfully quiet in here.” He set it down on the table before them, then sat in the armchair.
“Why, you got a guilty conscience?” Manda asked him, her eyes bright. When Alex’s gaze flickered briefly in Joshua’s direction, his stomach turned over.
“I knew I had something to tell you both.” Joshua cleared his throat, then told them about Micah’s commission.
“Oh, that is so great.” Manda’s face glowed. “You must be so proud.”
Joshua nodded. “I wondered if he would attend the service, but he says no.”
“It’s on October 26 in DC,” Alex said quietly. “I had thought about going.”
“Really?” Joshua peered at him. “Why?”
Alex stared at his laced fingers. “I’m about to try a case where the perpetrators deliberately targeted men they thought were gay.
They hurled vicious homophobic slurs at them.
They left Greg to die out there. And all of this in the same state where Matthew died, twenty years ago, in shockingly similar conditions.
Twenty years, and Wyoming still doesn’t have hate crime legislation.
So I think it’s kind of fitting for a County Prosecutor from Wyoming to attend, don’t you? ”
Joshua swallowed. “You’re really thinking of going?”
Alex looked at him and nodded. “I’ll make arrangements when I go into the office on Tuesday.” He leaned forward and began the task of pouring coffee.
Joshua watched him, his emotions divided.
I still don’t know you, do I? I think I’ve got you all worked out, and then you go and say or do something that makes me think again.
Maybe all they needed was a little more time.
Maybe.