Chapter Twenty
Jack
Ria didn”t call like she said she would, but I get it. I know she would have been busy tending to the girls. She sent a message saying she didn”t regret the other night and thank God, because it”s all I”ve thought about. Now I”ve had a taste of her—for real this time—I need more. Visions of her coming apart beneath me invaded my dreams and provided me with a visual for my morning jerk off in the shower.
However, my morning of work doesn”t allow much time for daydreaming about Maria Kennedy. I’m stuck in back to back meetings with our investors and accountant, making plans for the festive season. Before our next meeting starts, I need to check she’s doing okay. Rising from my seat. I swipe my phone from the table and head for the door.
“Where you off to, lover boy? Is the wifey waiting for you in the office for a cheeky hook up?” Harry grins, leaning back in his chair.
“Fuck you,” I mutter back, trying not to let him get a rise out of me.
“Don”t forget your hand stretches. Wouldn”t want you to get cramp, in those fingers.” He laughs, making Jazz hands.
Brad lets out a low chuckle.
“You know, I”m starting to see why Ali can”t stand you. No wonder you”re single,” I bite back
“Nah, she loves me. She just doesn”t know it yet,” he says with a shit-eating grin.
“You keep telling yourself that,” I deadpan. “I’ll be back in five. Can you start the meeting if they get here early?” I ask, directing my question at Brad, who replies with a nod.
I”ve left the other side of the club to Brad. I”ve been reluctant to dive into that side of things, but he was adamant it”s the way forward and extremely lucrative. You only have to show Harry a dollar sign and the man will sign on the dotted line. Chris suggested we have a private gentleman’s lounge with dancers during our initial meeting and knowing he and some of his associates are on their way to discuss the opening of the lounge, I use that as my opportunity to sneak out.
I never thought I would be involved with a woman who has kids, but those little girls have found a way into my heart. I think about them every day; What are they up to? Is Lexi causing havoc? Has Elle taken her first steps on her own yet? I know Ria has said she”s so close to walking and for some reason, I really hope I get to witness one of her firsts.
I slip into my office, take off my suit jacket, and hang it on the back of the door. I add a pod to my coffee machine, welcoming the rich aroma filling my office. Taking my steaming mug of coffee with a dash of creamer, I sit on the couch and memories of Saturday night come flooding back. Ria writhing beneath me, my fingers buried inside her, her sweet taste.
Fuck, I want her again, need to have her again.
I pull my phone from my pants pocket and swipe to find Ria’s number.
It rings and rings, and just when I think it will go to voicemail, she answers. “Hey, Jack. Now’s not a great time. Can I call you later?” she rushes.
I can hear Elle wailing in the background. She doesn”t sound happy at all.
“Ri, is everything okay?” I’m concerned that she’s managing all this on her own because I know for sure fuck face Alex isn’t there helping her with his daughters. In the time since Ria has come back into my life, I can count on one hand the times Alex has seen his girls. I”ve spent more time with them lately than he has. Why would he not want to be with his girls, all of his girls? He truly fucked it, and the sad part is, I don’t even think he realizes it or cares. If they were mine I’d never let them go.
“Ugh… yeah… ssshhh, baby, it”s okay. It”s okay,” I hear her soothe Elle, who’s still wailing in the background.
“Elle woke with a fever so I took her to the doctor. She”s got another ear infection. I picked up her prescription but forgot to get more Tylenol for the pain and her fever, so—yes, Lex, wear whatever shoes you want, sweetie, just put something on.”
I don”t know how she multi-tasks like that. It’s like she’s having three conversions at once.
“... so, I need to go back to the pharmacy and get some, but Elle is screaming and Lexi won”t put shoes on and…”
I’m up on my feet, walking towards the cupboard to grab a change of clothes before she finishes her sentence.
“Ri, stay where you are. I”m going to get the Tylenol and bring it over.” Wedging the phone under my chin, I unbutton my shirt to change into some gray joggers, a black tee, and some tennis shoes. I learned from my last visit not to wear my expensive suits when seeing the girls.
“Jack, don”t be ridiculous. You’re at work, and I’m just getting the girls in the car now. I’m fine.”
“Ri, let me help you… Please,” I reply, my tone pleading.
There”s a pause, as if she is contemplating my offer. As if on cue, Elle lets out a shrill cry and I can hear Lexi in the background saying she can”t find her sparkly shoes.
“Uh, okay… okay, if you’re sure.”
“Yes I’m sure. Text me what you need and I”ll swing by the pharmacy.”
“You’re a lifesaver… thank you.”
“Anything for you, sweetheart.”
I pull up at CVS and head inside, armed with the list Ria texted me.
Baby Tylenol, teething powder, and size 4 diapers.
I head to the aisle that has a sign saying ‘baby’.
What the hell?
There are about five different brands of diapers. I can”t even find the teething powder, and the Tylenol comes in two flavors. Bending down and narrowing my eyes at all the different boxes, rubbing my forehead, I feel my heart rate begin to rise, anxiety settling in.
I don”t want to mess this up and let her down.
It must look like I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing and clearly a fish out of water because an older lady in a white pharmacist coat comes over and offers to help me.
I tell her what I need and she shows me.
“What brand does your baby wear, dear?” I don”t want to appear like an idiot or tell this random lady that I’m not buying for my baby, and I’m buying for my friend’s little sister, who is currently going through a divorce, and I have feelings for her and am desperate to spend time with her, so I’m here trying to decide if I should buy Huggies, Pampers or some brand with a creepy looking baby on it.
“Ooohhhh, ermmmmm, well, we are in between brands, so I”ll get one of each.”
The lady gives me a knowing smile. She knows I”m full of shit and pats me on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, dear. Lots of dads don”t know the brands of the diapers their baby wears.”
I smile back, not correcting her that Elle isn”t my baby.
Is it weird that a part of me wishes she was? That they were both mine… all three of them?
I pay for the items plus a bunch of other stuff the woman suggested to help Elle. I head out of CVS and next door is a Starbucks. I know damn well Ria hasn”t eaten today because she wouldn”t have thought to put herself first, so I grab her favorite vanilla latte, a breakfast bagel for each of us, and of course, cake pops for Lexi.
I head out and place it all on the passenger seat of my Audi. The sun has finally peaked through the clouds and I reach into the back seat and grab my black baseball cap. I glance at myself in my rearview mirror; I forgot to shave this morning. I run my hand over the five o”clock shadow across my jawline and take a deep breath. Mentally preparing myself to see Ria, a mixture of nerves and excitement.
Less than ten minutes later, I’m pulling into the driveway of her house. Exiting the car I give her neighbor, who is tending to her front lawn, a little wave. Opening the passenger door and reaching in to grab the Starbucks bag and the three bags from CVS.
Jeez, bought a lot of shit.
I step onto Ria”s white wooden porch and before I take a second step, Lexi comes flying out the front door and runs towards me.
“ Jaaaaccckkkkkk.”
“Careful, Lexi girl, I”ve got hot coffee for your mommy.”
“Did you get me anything?” she asks with a smile that is impossible to say no to.
“Maybe.” She turns to skip in the house and I hear Elle crying before I even enter.
I kick the door shut as I have no free hands and head for the kitchen. I place all the bags on the kitchen counter and go in search of Ria and Elle.
Ria is in the front room with Elle in some sort of sheet wrapped around her front, swaying her from side to side. Ria looks exhausted, but still just as beautiful. She could never be anything but beautiful to me, but it”s clear she hasn”t had a minute and has barely slept.
She turns to face me and her eyes light up, like my being here has suddenly made everything okay, and my heart does a weird flutter.
“My hero,” she says on an exhale, walking towards me, I open up my arms and she leans against my chest.
“Hey, sweetheart,” I say softly. I press a kiss to Elle’s forehead. It feels so hot you could fry an egg on her. “Hey, baby girl. You’re not feeling good, huh?” Her little face is bright red from all the crying and she is tugging at her right ear.
“She hasn”t stopped crying since around four this morning. She”s got a bad infection in her ear. I”ve given her the antibiotic the doctor gave her, but it won”t kick in till tomorrow. Thank you for running errands for me.”
“It”s no trouble,” I tell her honestly before taking her hand and leading her to the kitchen to show her everything I got. She stops in the doorway, looking at her kitchen counter covered in the bags.
“Did you do a full grocery shop?” she laughs. “I only needed three things.”
“Yeah, I went a bit overboard. I wasn”t sure what brands you use and Carol in CVS clearly saw me coming because she sold me every brand of diaper and teething powder going. She even threw in...” I reach in the bag and pull out the items, placing them on the white marble effect kitchen counter. “Ear drops, bath salts, a rubber duck, bath crayons, a fun sponge that changes color when it gets wet, wipes, diaper rash cream, baby shampoo, and princess bubble bath. Soooo, yeah, I think you are set for the next six months.”
Ria bursts out laughing and it”s the sweetest sound. I”d do anything to hear her laugh like that every day. Elle seems to finally calmed a little and Ria stands there swaying slowly side to side looking between all the items I got.
“Wow, Carol had your pants down, didn”t she, convincing you to buy all this?”
“If she had offered me stocks and shares in the cattle market, I”d have signed up if I thought it would help you.”
She stills, staring mouth slightly agape, looking at me so intently, as if the idea of someone wanting to help her is a foreign concept.
“If I ever go into sales, I’m hiring Carol. She”s a force.” I lean in over the kitchen counter towards Ria, lowering my voice. “But there”s only one woman I’d let have my pants down.” A pink blush hits her cheeks, and she bites down on her plump lower lip.
Yeah, I think we are okay.
I open up the Starbucks bag and start taking everything out. “And because I know you probably haven”t eaten, I got you a vanilla latte and a breakfast bagel… oh and a cake pop for Lexi because, well, it’s Lexi… I”d buy that girl a whole candy store if she asked.”
.”Jack… you… erm.” She blows out a slow breath. Titling her head to the ceiling, her eyes fill with tears and I just want to hold her. To me, this is just the basics, the least I can do. I get the feeling Alex never did anything for her and she would have had to wade this storm on her own.
I walk to stand behind her, pressing my front to her back and bring my arms around her to hug not only her but Elle too, inhaling Ria’s sweet scent, letting her know, without speaking, that I am here for her, for all three of them.
“Thank you,” she whispers, swiping her fingertips under her eyes.
“Anything for you, Ri,” I murmur, pressing a feather-light kiss to the side of her head.
I release her from my hold and we both start to unpack away the insane amount of crap I bought, whilst Ria gives Elle some Tylenol and eats her bagel, and drinks her coffee. Just as I finish my own, Lexi comes into the kitchen in a pink tutu and waving a wand. “Come on, Mommy, let”s goooooo,” she says, spinning.
“Oh, crap,” Ria mutters under her breath, closing her eyes. She opens them and looks down at Elle, still wrapped in this weird sheet thing.
Note to self, find out what that is called.
She”s finally fallen asleep and, according to Ria, her fever has started to go down.
“Lex, I”m so sorry. We”re gonna have to miss ballet today. Elle is too sick. We’ll go next week, baby, I promise.”
The little look on Lexi’s face breaks me. Her mouth turns down and her bottom lip pokes out before she hangs her head. I”d do anything to take that look off her face so without even thinking about what I”m offering, the words leave my mouth. “I”ll take her.”
Ria whips her head around. “You”ll take her?” There’s surprise in her voice.
“Yeah.” I shrug.
“To ballet?” she repeats, still sounding confused.
“Yeah,” I say like it”s no big deal.
“You will take Lexi to her ballet class?” she says again, like she can”t quite believe what I”m offering.
“Why not? You can stay here with Elle. I”ve cleared my schedule for the day. What do ya say, Lex? Want me to take you?”
“Yeeeeaaaaahhhhhh,” she cries, spinning on the spot.
I laugh. “Okay, go get your shoes. Let”s go.”
“Jack, are you sure?”
“Of course, as long as you”re okay with it. I”ll keep her safe and I won”t let her out of my sight,” I reassure her, worrying I”ve overstepped.
“I know you will. I trust you completely.”
Oh, thank fuck.
Warm pride fills my chest. She trusts me.
“Alex would never take her, no matter how much she asked.” And that statement right there is like a sledgehammer to the heart. How could he not want to take his own daughter to her activities? He really is the biggest prick going and doesn”t deserve to be their dad.
“She’s the coolest kid I know, Ri. I love hanging out with her.” I lean over the counter and place a chaste kiss to Ria’s lips. Then I freeze, realizing what I’m doing, but she doesn”t pull back. It felt so natural and right to kiss her goodbye and I hope there is a day I get to kiss her hello and goodbye forever.
I pick up my baseball cap and put it on before I grab my keys. “But I’m taking her in my car. Not a chance I”m driving your death trap.”
I turn towards the doorway, “Okay, Princess… Let’s go,” I call.
I”ve never driven a kid in my car. I drive so slowly I wonder if we are actually moving, but I have precious cargo, so there’s not a chance I”m taking any risks.
When we pull up outside the ballet studio, I get out and walk to the back of the car and get Lexi out. Thankfully unbuckling her seems a hell of a lot easier than buckling her in the damn thing. I swear my assault pack I wore in Afghanistan had less straps and belts than this carseat.
I lift her out and place her on the ground where she does a little twirl. She”s dressed in a pink tutu and matching ballet slippers. Ria has put her hair up in a bun on the top of her head and finished it with a pink bow. Shit, she looks cute. She reaches up and holds my hand and leads me towards the dance studio.
I open the door to a smaller waiting area to find at least twenty little girls huddled together. Lexi lets go of my hand and skips over to them.
The room falls silent and all eyes are on me. I feel like a prized pig at the county fair. On show for everyone to have a good look at and decide how much I”m worth before they place their bets. I glance round the room to find I’mthe only male.
Well, this is awkward.
One woman stands and walks over to me. She”s blonde, a bit taller than Ria, caked in makeup, looking like the Lululemon store threw up on her.
“Hey, I”m Ria’s friend, Margot. You must be Jack.” She extends her arm and reaches for my hand with her perfectly polished fingernails and the giant rock on her wedding finger catches my eye. I shake her hand and reply hesitantly wondering how the heck she knows who I am.
“Errm, yeah, I”m Jack, nice to meet you.”
“I hear poor Elle is sick. Ri texted me to say you would be bringing Lexi so she couldn”t make our coffee date. Lexi plays with my daughter, Emery. She”s over there.” She points to a little blonde girl who is talking to Lexi and I smile.
“And this is Shannon, Maddie, Britney and Paige. We’re the ballet moms.” She points out the women one by one who look like carbon copies of her. Ria doesn’t fit in with these women at all, but they seem nice enough. The only one who breaks the mold is Paige, who looks like she can still move her face, unlike Margot here, who I can”t work out if she”s twenty-eight or forty-eight due to all the Botox.
“You can sit with us.” She grins, and the way she strokes my arm makes me uneasy.
Just as I go to take a seat, the dance teacher appears in the doorway, ushering the girls to form an orderly line and enter the studio.
“Parents, if you want to line up behind the girls we can then head on in and get the class started,” she shouts in order to be heard over the chaos in the room.
Line up? Where are we going?
“I thought we waited out here?” I asked Margot.
“Oh we do usually, but, it”s parent participation week.”
I look at her wide eyed. “Come again, it”s what now?”
“Parent participation week,” she says like I am supposed to know what the fuck that is. “Once a semester the parents join in with the class. Did Ria not tell you?”
I just stare at Margot, regretting all my life choices. “No, must have slipped her mind.”
“Oh, well, it”s lots of fun. You can sit with me.”
I follow the moms into the studio. I can’t back out now. Lexi can”t be the only kid in class without an adult with her, so I suck it up, pull up my big boy pants, take off my tennis shoes and pray to God I can make it through this class without embarrasing myself or Lexi.
Twenty minutes later I’m sitting on the studio floor cross-legged wearing a plastic crown on my head and holding a pink wand. I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror that lines the back wall and wonder how I got here. How did I go from living in Miami, spending my days running our bar to here, living my best life, participating in a pre-schoolers ballet class.
Because you are falling hard for her mom, the voice in my head whispers and I don’t deny it.
Lexi appears out of nowhere, holding her hand behind her back with a mischevious look on her face.
”What have you got there Lex?”
“I’m going to make you a fairy”
“Oh yeah, how are you going to do that?”
“Surprise!” She giggles, as she throws a handful of glitter, but I’m not quick enough and the entire thing lands in my eye.
“And sprinkle the magic, sprinkle,” Miss Susan chants as she circles us, and with that, Lexi launches another handful of glitter into the air. I duck, covering my face with my hands in preperation for her next attack.
Jesus this stuff stings.
“Are you having fun, Jack? I’m having so much fun. The next song is my favourite” Lexi says, practically vibrating with excitement. I don”t know if I want to know what this next song is. I’m still recovering from our performance of the Nutcracker.
“Yeah, so much fun Lex,” I tell her, whilst picking silver glitter out of my eye. I”ll be billing Miss Susan for the laser eye surgery I”ll be needing to regain my vision.
Miss Susan stands in the middle of the circle and claps her hands. “Okay, my little bunnies, it”s time to hop hop hop up on to your feet.”
Bunnies? Hop?
Margot leans over and whispers, “You might wanna hold on to your bunny for this next part,” she mutters, gesturing to my dick with a wink.
What the hell?
A song I’ve never heard before blasts through the speakers. Miss Susan shows everyone how to put their hands in front of their face like little bunny paws and she starts to jump up and down.
I feel like an absolute idiot holding my hands like this, but it”s for Lexi so I can”t not do it.
And as I start jumping I instantly understand what Margot was talking about. I definitely need to hold on to my ‘bunny’ somehow. My gray sweatpants give everything away, unfortunately. In my defense, I didn”t anticipate hopping around with a bunch of kids today.
”Jump, Jack, jump!” Lexi yells and I automatically obey and yep, my bunny is trying to escape the hutch. I try to half jump, but Lexi isn”t having any of it. She stomps over and points at my feet. ”Feet off the floor like me.” She jumps high and raises her eyebrows for me to copy. So I take a deep breath and hop... my poor bunny.
If Harry and Brad could see me now they would have a field day and never let me live this down.
I strategically place my hands lower to cover my crotch in the hopes that no one notices my leaping dick as I jump around, trying to keep my back to everyone. I”d rather shield innocent eyes here. The less damage we all leave with, the better.
The song begins to slow and the girls all fall to the floor and I thank whoever”s listening that it”s all over except I”m wrong, so fucking wrong. The beat comes back again and so do the hops. Everyone leaps to their feet again. Sweat beads over my brow as I alternate one hand covering my junk and the other perched beneath my chin, smiling like a sweet little bunny. Jesus, Lord above, kill me right fucking now.
Ria owes me big time and I can think of a few ways she can make it up to me.