34. Life Support – Brad
When Tess leaves in a hurry after we start back into our set, I wonder what the rush is about, but nobody seems too phased by it. And when Ian tells us that we’re adding dates to the tour, it kind of makes sense why she would make a quick exit. She’s probably on her way to Blackmore to meet with Eliza to go over the media plan for everything.
However, by the end of rehearsal, I get the distinct feeling that something is off with everyone. Practice went fine, but it’s almost like everyone is avoiding me, or mad at me, and I have no idea why.
“So, what’s up with everyone?” I finally ask, as Ian leaves with his daughters. Charlie’s in the corner cleaning up, so she’s out of earshot if there is a problem I need to deal with. “Why is there a stick up everyone’s ass all of a sudden?”
Stefan eyes me with a shrug as he winds up a cord. “Nothing, man. Just same old, same old.”
Emmett and Dakota regard him briefly, then seem to accept his answer as their own, going back to what they were doing. Apparently, there is nothing wrong, and it’s all in my head. With the new dates added, and ticket sales going so well, I’d expect at least a little more enthusiasm from these guys. That alone makes me wonder if Stefan is telling the truth.
I study everyone again, looking for whatever it is that I’m obviously missing, but Charlie comes running up behind me and hugs my leg.
“Can we go now Daddy?” she asks, turning her face up to me, her innocent eyes wide. I know spending so much time here wasn’t her idea of fun when she chose to stay with me. If Hayley and June weren’t here to keep her company all the time, she’d be regretting her choice.
“Sure thing,” I say, ruffling her curls. I grab her hand to leave and turn back to the guys. “Catch you all tomorrow.”
They all wave and mumble their goodbyes, mostly to Charlie than to me. That’s fine. I don’t need the niceties, and Charlie beams at them as she flounces next to me, her newly crafted butterfly wings flapping behind her. They really are beautiful, but they’ve taken a beating this afternoon with all of her running around and are looking a little worse for wear. She sure loves hard.
Just like her dad.
In the car on the way home, the questions start. And they don’t stop.
“Can we have dinner with Tess tonight?”
“Probably not tonight. Tess is pretty busy with our upcoming tour, babe.”
“What about tomorrow night? Will she be busy then?”
“Maybe. We’ll have to ask her.”
“Can you call her now and ask?”
“No. I’m driving.”
“But you always talk to people when you drive.”
“Only if they call me and it’s important.”
“Isn’t dinner with Tess important?”
“Of course it is.”
“Then you should call her.”
And on it goes for the half hour it takes to get food and get home. I’ve tried to beat down Charlie’s expectations as delicately and diplomatically as possible, but she’s persistent. Just as I thought my feelings for Tess were solidifying, I got the definite sense that something was off today. Throw in my ex Sierra’s fucking weird phone call out of nowhere this afternoon, which only confirmed how I feel about Tess, and now I feel a little lost. I don’t want Charlie to get hurt by whatever might be going on.
I’ve been thinking about Tess nonstop since we met, and the last few days have been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster already. And now, everything feels like it’s out of whack.
“You should call Tess and see if she wants to go to dinner tomorrow,” Charlie pipes in again, breaking my train of thought.
I roll my eyes and sigh dramatically. This kid. “Fine. But I’ll text her. If she’s busy, I don’t want to bug her. Deal?”
She rolls her eyes and sighs right back at me. Man, we are too alike sometimes. “Fiiine.”
I grab my phone to type out a quick text message, noticing all of Tess’s drunk texts from Saturday night. They really are cute. If I weren’t too drunk myself on Saturday night to notice them, it could have been an oddly sweet moment – the two of us drunk texting each other from across the city.
Instead, I was too hungover to deal with them when I did notice them yesterday, and too wrapped up in all things Charlie shopping for school supplies and butterfly parts the rest of the day to respond. Maybe that was a misstep?
ME: Hey there. Dinner sometime this week if you’re not too busy?
After a few minutes, Charlie asks, “Well? What did she say?”
I know there hasn’t been a response, but I glance at my phone to check anyway. Nothing.
“I told you she’s probably busy,” I say, looking around the room for something, anything, to distract Charlie from this. Hell, to distract me from this. We’ve both got our hopes up, and there’s a sinking feeling in my gut that we’re both about to be severely disappointed. “How about we watch a movie? We haven’t ripped apart the new Lion King in a while…”
As we watch the movie, in our usual spots on the couch, popcorn bowl between us, I can’t help but drift my gaze to my phone every few minutes, willing it to light up with an alert from Tess. The longer time drags on without a response, the more I know that something’s wrong. But what could it be?
Is it because I didn’t respond to her texts over the weekend? I think Tess would understand that when I’m with Charlie, I’m not always tied to my phone. At least I would hope that’s the case. I’m pretty sure Tess and Charlie have formed a mutual admiration society for each other. At least, for Charlie’s sake, I hope that Tess feels the same for her. I’m biased and think everyone should love my little girl like I do, though. So, there’s that.
However, knowing how past girlfriends have used Charlie and her affections to get to me, makes me rethink everything. Are we too far in to avoid that heartache already?
Am I that far gone?
I glance at my silent phone one more time.
Still nothing.