32. Oliver
THIRTY-TWO
Oliver
“You had to outdo yourself, huh?” Frankie asked as we piled into the small cart set into a metal track.
Lately, our relationship had revolved heavily around healing, support, and letting each other in. But that wasn’t where it had started. It had all started with fun. And what better way to end our time together than barreling down on a mountain coaster on a beautiful spring day?
“I figured I wouldn’t be cruel and force you to do a physical activity on your last day here.”
She sat between my legs, and I squeezed her tight as we fastened our seatbelts.
“I’m worried I might go into adrenaline withdrawal without you checking up on me,” she said.
The employee ran through a few safety instructions before sending us down the hill. Frankie squealed almost immediately as our speed increased and the trees whizzed by us.
“Press the brakes!” she demanded. “This is too fast!”
“Life is too short for brakes!” I yelled, laughing as gusts of air breezed against our faces, whipping our hair back .
As we rode down the mountain, I felt more alive than ever. Not because of the rush or the speed, but because of the way my knees were firmly locked around Frankie’s hips. With our countdown reduced from days to hours, I made every excuse to touch her and have her as close to me as possible. Tomorrow was going to absolutely gut me, and I knew Frankie wasn’t fairing much better. But true to her word, she’d kept up a genuine smile nearly all day.
If I was being honest with myself, I was kind of worried how I was going to handle tonight. The last time I’d get to hold her in bed. The last time I’d hear her soft breathing next to my ear as she fell asleep right before I did. I shook the thought from my mind and focused instead on the beautiful scenery surrounding us and Frankie’s delighted laughs.
My chest swelled when we got to the bottom and she begged to go again.
There was a lightness about her that wasn’t there when she’d first arrived in Key Ridge, and I couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride in playing a small part in the change in her. She’d changed me, too, of course. Despite this thing between us being temporary, her impact on me was permanent.
The only problem was that after our goodbye, I wasn’t so sure what I was supposed to do with this newfound reflection of myself.
We rode down a couple more times. The last time, she went solo and slowed down so much, I ended up riding her tail. When I called out to remind her that she had nothing to be scared of, she turned and yelled back, “It’s not about being scared, it’s about enjoying the view!”
Damn it if that didn’t make me even more obsessed with her than I already was.
After the rides were over and we got back into my car, I grabbed her hand and brought it to my lips, kissing it .
“Thanks for today. It was perfect,” she said, looking beautiful with her hair wild and going in every direction.
“Can I drive you to the airport tomorrow?” The question fell from my lips, and I regretted it as soon as I saw her smile fade.
“That might be too hard, I think.”
Her answer killed me, but I understood it all the same. It was going to be hard regardless of when the final goodbye happened. That still didn’t stop me from wanting to drag out every moment with her—steal every last second like it was all I had.
I put the car into reverse and pulled away from the lot at the base of the mountain coaster.
“What would we do right now if we were the most carefree people in the world?” I asked her, rolling down both of our windows.
She squinted into the distance before offering, “Ice cream?”
“Ice cream it is.”
Later that night, I held her in my arms, tighter than I ever had before. My mind raced relentlessly.
First, it replayed every memory Frankie and I had made together in our short time here. From that first kiss at the bar, to her failed attempt at snowboarding, to sleeping in a tent underneath the stars together.
I had imagined Key Ridge would be an unforgettable experience filled with incredible outdoor activities and one extreme sport after another. Reflecting back on it all, it would have been nothing without her.
My thoughts drifted to her in New York. Wearing some business-casual outfit and holding a to-go coffee mug as she raced to her new office. It was a side of Frankie I had never known, but that was the real her, apparently. She’d go on to have this perfect life that had nothing to do with me. She’d go apartment hunting. She’d find her new favorite restaurant. She’d meet new people. She’d date . I grimaced at the thought. She was still wrapped in my arms, and I still found myself being preemptively jealous of the next guy who would get to hold her like this.
She was my fucking girl.
Letting her go would be the hardest thing I’d ever done. My mind was starting to grow blank—forgetting every reason we couldn’t be together. Was changing for a girl really the end of the world?
I attempted to picture myself in New York, showing up in a polo and khakis to an interview for some entry-level office job that I likely wouldn’t land due to lack of experience. My entire being repelled that idea. But an idea my body found even more objectionable was never holding Frankie again.
I was in love with this girl.
There was no use in trying to deny the fact, especially within my own brain. Even though I had zero experience when it came to these things, I knew she was everything. Love wasn’t something you could block out. Maybe I wouldn’t say it out loud, but it was there.
What was that old saying? If you loved something, let it go.
And unfortunately, I loved Frankie so much that I would indeed be letting her go tomorrow.
The drive back to her sister’s house the next morning was quiet. Our fingers were loosely threaded together, resting in my lap. I kept sneaking glances at her, only to find her staring at me each time.
She was right not to let me drive her to the airport. This alone was already too difficult.
The goodbye had to happen sometime.
As we pulled into the driveway, every muscle in my body seized. This was it. As much as I’d tried to put this moment out of my mind, it was here. Throughout my life, I’d always managed to plaster on a smile no matter what—in awkward times, hard times, sad times, you name it. Making light of a situation was how I’d dealt with every problem.
So when we both got out of the car and slammed our doors shut, I was surprised to find that the corners of my lips were the heaviest they’d ever been. My forehead was tensed and my jaw clenched. I was fighting back emotion, and I couldn’t even fake a smile if I wanted to.
It was taking everything in me to hold it together right now. I wanted to so badly for Frankie’s sake.
When she came around the car to give me a hug, a few tears had escaped her eyes. I reached for her and held her to me like my life depended on it.
“Thank you for everything,” she whispered.
I wanted to laugh, but I couldn’t quite bring myself to. Her thanking me ? Everything she’d given to me was far more than what I’d offered her.
“Miss you already,” I said against the top of her head.
“Same.” Her hands gripped the back of my shirt, and I never wanted to let go. Wetness formed in the corners of my eyes, and I begged the tears not to fall. I wasn’t someone who cried, but I had never had to say goodbye to the girl I was in love with before. This shit wasn’t for the weak .
The sound of the screen door opening caused me to look up.
“There you are. It’s almost time to go…” Mattie’s words trailed off as she caught sight of the both of us still in an embrace. “Sorry, I’ll give you two a minute.” She hurried back inside, the sound of the door swinging shut behind her.
“I guess this is it,” Frankie said, looking up at me with wet eyes.
“Go knock ‘em dead in New York.”
“And you be safe out there rafting,” she said, digging a finger into my chest. “No helmet mishaps again, got it?”
“Yes, boss,” I said before dipping down and capturing her mouth with mine. My lips moved softly over hers, tracing every detail. When she pulled away, everything in me protested. No matter how long we stood out there, I knew the kiss would never be enough.
Then I let her walk away from me.
“Bye, Oliver.” She gave me a wave, backing away toward the front door to the house.
“Bye, Frankie,” I said, forcing myself to open the door to my car and climb in. My hand clenched around the gear shift as I put the car in reverse, actively making myself leave.
I rolled down the window to catch one more glimpse of what surely must be the most beautiful woman on the planet. She stood on the front porch, her body leaning against the door she had propped open. I backed out of the driveway, hardly taking my eyes off her.
With one last wave, I drove away from her, my eyes glued to the rearview mirror as I watched her grow smaller and smaller.
It wasn’t lost on me that she didn’t go inside until I turned off the street and was completely out of sight.