Chapter 14
Chapter
Fourteen
I have all these feelings.
Milo
I feel mellow and loose-limbed when I make my way downstairs dressed in old ripped jeans and an oversized high-necked cream jumper.
The clothes feel comfortable and soft on my skin and I’ve left my hair loose.
I follow the sound of conversation to the dining room.
This is a cosy room situated at the back of the house with views of the village through its floor-to-ceiling windows.
Tonight the village is lit up like one of Blackpool’s illuminations.
The others are seated at the large table. A fire is crackling in the fireplace and Frank Sinatra is crooning about letting it snow. I inhale the scent of something wonderful cooking and my stomach rumbles. Almost without thought, my eyes search out Niall.
He’s slumped in a loose, contented sort of way at the head of the table talking in a low voice to my brother.
Barefoot and wearing a green and blue plaid shirt with threadbare Levi’s, he looks gorgeous.
I pause at the sight of the two of them with their heads together, but almost as if he senses my presence he looks up and grins widely at the sight of me.
It’s a warm and wide smile with an edge of satisfied contentment about it, and I flush because surely it’s screaming at the others that yes, he got inside my arse this afternoon.
I sneak a quick look at them but luckily no one has noticed. Sam is slumped looking half pissed already while Jacinta and her sister are indulging in a conversation that has more hissing than a nest of snakes. Daisy’s husband, Adam, is rubbing his wife’s back somewhat anxiously.
He looks up and spies me and a rather relieved look crosses his face. “ Milo ,” he exclaims as if Madonna has just walked in the room. “Look, everyone, it’s Milo.”
Niall snorts and Jacinta and Daisy break off their argument for a brief second to smile before immediately returning to it. Adam slumps and I pat his shoulder gingerly as I make my way over to the table.
As I near it, Niall jumps up, and I stare at him as he pulls out my chair. Conversation stops immediately and everyone stares, making him redden.
“What are you doing?” I whisper bemusedly.
“Pulling your chair out for you. I would have thought that was obvious,” he hisses back.
I shake my head and sit down, wincing slightly when my tender arse protests. A smile plays across his lips and I shake my head. “Just because I took it up the arse doesn’t suddenly mean I can’t move furniture out for myself,” I whisper.
“Babe, the way you did it I’m inclined to give you a golden chair to sit in,” he says with a smirk. “And a silk cushion.”
I can’t help my smile. Sometimes it seems like it’s been grafted on there when I’m around him.
I only have to look at him and my lips want to turn upwards.
Feeling slightly flustered at the thought I look determinedly around the table, flushing when I find my brother’s eyes on me.
He’s watching me curiously, as if I’m some sort of rare animal at the zoo.
He’s been doing it for a few days and it’s alternately worrying and annoying me.
I grimace at him irritatedly and an amused smile ticks at his lips.
Daisy breaks off her hissed conversation with Jacinta and eyes me. I immediately slump slightly in the vague hope that she can’t see me. It doesn’t work, and Niall snorts.
“So, Milo, have you given up the idea of snowboarding since you came off again today?”
I blink. “No, of course not. If I quit something just because I fell over, I’d never have learnt to walk as a child.”
She stares at me unblinkingly, like a rather judgemental owl. “You’re not terribly good at it though.” My brother bites his lips to keep a smile in and she continues remorselessly. “I think it’s always good to know one’s own limitations.”
“ Do you ?” I’m startled because there’s no way she recognises her own. She’s so hugely pleased with herself it’s not possible that she recognises her own faults, legion though they are.
She nods happily. “Of course. It’s so important for one’s personal development. Every morning I meditate for half an hour on my character. Adam is very keen on it.”
I bet he is, I think. It must be the only time in the day when she’s quiet.
The sudden shocked silence alerts me to potential danger which is elevated to Def Con One when Daisy glares at me. “What did you just say?” she asks in a dangerous voice.
“Oh my God, did I say that out loud?” I groan and Niall starts to laugh helplessly.
“You really did.” He leans forward. “Watch this,” he whispers and sits up straight, saying in a loud voice, “Daisy, you must tell me what I did wrong at skiing today.” She immediately unbends after giving me a caustic glare.
“Thank you, Niall,” he intones to me as she launches into a whole monologue about his skiing technique.
“I don’t need to thank you,” I say sourly. “She’ll forget all about her grievance with me the second she spots me doing something wrong. I’ve never known anyone so obsessed with judging other people. I’m surprised she hasn’t popped up at the bottom of our bed with scorecards yet.”
“They’d say ten,” he says loyally and probably completely erroneously. Then he shudders. “I think you just gave me performance anxiety.”
I grin and shake my head at him and turn to tune into Daisy’s monologue. It’s abruptly broken by Jacinta who yawns widely and loudly. Daisy falters but valiantly continues to dissect Niall’s stance, then gives up when Jacinta makes snoring noises.
“I’m sorry,” Daisy hisses. “Am I boring you?”
“Yes, but don’t worry about it,” Jacinta says blithely. “It won’t stop you anyway.”
“I’d like to think that I can take conversational cues as well as the next person.”
“Only if the next person is Helen Keller.”
I choke on my first sip of water. Daisy turns to stare at me. “Sorry,” I mutter. “Wrong hole.”
Niall tops up my glass. “We’ll have to work on that, sweetheart. That sounds like a problem for Niall Fawcett to fix.”
Daisy ignores him and turns back to Jacinta. “At least I don’t think I can fuck my way through awkward silences.”
“Oh, I say,” Adam interjects, and the two girls turn furious faces on him. He subsides, holding his hand up in surrender, and gulps his wine down quickly before she can lecture him about his alcohol content, which has been a common theme this week.
“Well, excuse me for having a healthy sexual drive,” Jacinta says and glares at Daisy when she smirks. “At least I use mine. I bet Adam would have to fight his way through cobwebs to get into your vagina.”
“How dare you?” Daisy shouts, rising up from the table. I brighten up at the thought that she might be leaving but then slump as she lowers herself back to her chair.
“No, really,” Jacinta says. “I’m surprised he hasn’t got a fedora and a bullwhip. Didn’t Indiana Jones go after ancient, dusty relics?”
“You’re a fucking bitch,” Daisy yells abruptly, discarding her impression of the Virgin Mary which she’s been aiming at all week.
“And you’re a dried up, desiccated, prissy old know-it-all.”
“You have spots.”
Jacinta gasps. “You bitch.”
“Ladies,” Niall says. “Please don’t argue.
” They turn as one to glare at him and he holds his hands up.
“Well, if needs must, then please go ahead. But make sure you go outside and let the neighbours hear. It’ll reaffirm their impression that this chalet is the new outpost for Sodom and Gomorrah. You’ll make them very happy.”
I snort at the thought of his well-to-do neighbours who scurry away as soon as they see him, as if they wait for a second too long, he’ll expose himself.
Mind you, I suppose if he’s been as wild as I’ve heard about, I can’t blame them.
The thought sours my mood and I automatically look at my brother, as he’s been Niall’s partner in crime for so many years.
I jerk as I find him looking at me. “ What ?” I say sharply. “Shall I take a picture and then you can really examine it?”
“ Milo ,” Niall says in a surprised voice.
I shake my head. “Don’t start, Niall.”
“What do you mean?”
“Every time I’ve said anything to him this week you’ve jumped in and defended him.” I glare at him. “Pick a fucking side.” I pause. “Unless you’ve already done that.”
“Don’t be fucking ridiculous,” he says in a suddenly grim voice. “You know where my loyalties lie.”
“Not with me,” I say hotly but all of a sudden Gideon stands up, his chair scraping back.
“Stop behaving like a fucking child,” he growls and stalks out of the room, slamming the door behind him.
Silence falls, apart from Sam who jerks awake with a sudden start. “When’s breakfast?” he asks blearily.
Adam drains another glass of wine in a surreptitious manner. “This is like the dinner party from hell,” he slurs.
Daisy turns her glacial stare on him. “Adam, how many glasses have you had? You know how I feel about your drinking. Think of your waistline.”
“I’m more concerned about the damage that your voice is doing to my eardrums,” he says peevishly, pouring himself another glass.
“Adam,” she whispers furiously. “Remember who you’re talking to.”
“Yes, the Duchess of Do Nothing Right,” Jacinta says tartly. Daisy hisses and turns on her and they’re off again.
Niall throws his napkin on the table and goes to stand up, but my hand shoots out and stays him. “I’m sorry,” I say quietly.
He has a very disappointed look on his face which makes my stomach drop. “Until the next time,” he says slowly.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that you’re obsessed with the fact that I fucked him.” He shrugs. “I can’t take that back and honestly, I wouldn’t want to.”
“What?” My hurt is visible, and he shakes his head crossly.
“It’s part of my past and I don’t regret anything. It’s what’s gone towards making me who I am now. It’s created the me who’s with you now. I can’t ever regret that because I’m happy with the place I’m in.” He pauses. “Well, I would be if you’d get your head out of your arse.”
“Really?”