Chapter 20 – Gavin
20
Don’t Drag David Bowie Into This
Gavin
“THIS IS SO fucking good.” I shovel in another helping of the lasagna Alexis ordered me from her favorite restaurant. “I can’t believe I’ve never tried this place.”
“I can’t either.” She stretches one leg across the couch so she can poke my thigh with her toe. “I’m honestly kind of disappointed in you.” Alexis takes a bite of her own pasta, one hand coming to shield her mouth as she continues. “You live like, two blocks away from Bella Gusto. If I was that close, I’d be in a continuous carb coma.”
I lift a brow. “How do you know where I live?”
Al’s lips press tight together and a pink flush creeps over her cheeks. “My mom probably mentioned it.”
I slide my takeout container onto the coffee table and scoot closer. “That sounds a little suspect, Al.”
Her blue eyes widen. “You know where I live. Why shouldn’t I know where you live?”
“I know where you live because I helped move your shit in.” I slowly smile. “You know where I live because you’re nosy.”
Alexis sputters. “I’m not nosy.”
My smile turns to a smirk because she walked right into what I say next. “Why else would you want to know where I live?” I hook one arm around her waist, pulling her body to mine. “Maybe because you had a crush on me?” I’m teasing her. Sliding back into the way things were when we were younger.
But the way her skin goes from pink to beet red as she tries to wiggle away makes me pause.
I stare in shock as she squirms free. “Wait. Did you have a crush on me?”
Her head snaps my way, eyes narrowed. “Like you didn’t know.”
Holy fuck. I stand, needing to be on my feet for this conversation. “Are you serious?” I’m not sure how I feel about this revelation.
What it means.
“Ugh.” Alexis turns away from me, going to her kitchen. “Don’t let it go to your head. I was sixteen and also in love with David Bowie.”
My brows pinch together. “He’s dead.” I glance down my front, comparing my physique to the androgynous rocker’s. “And scrawny.”
“Two more reasons you shouldn’t let it go to your head.” Al collects the container of cream cake from the counter. “Obviously my standards are extremely flexible.”
“I—” My words are cut off when my cell starts to ring in my pocket. I pull it out and my stomach drops at the name displayed across the screen. I don’t want to answer it, but if I don’t, it’ll just keep ringing.
Bracing, I swipe across the screen then press it to my ear. “Hey, Leo.”
Al’s eyes widen and her skin pales.
I get it.
“Seems like someone found another way home.” Leo’s tone is gloating. “You’re welcome for that. I told you going out was a great fucking idea.”
I doubt he’d be thanking me if he knew who took me home.
Leo’s a good guy. A great friend. He wants me to be happy. But there are limits, and I have to guess fucking his little sister is a hard line. Not that I’ve fucked Alexis.
Yet.
“Sorry to disappear on you guys. Something came up.” I rake one hand through my hair, torn between guilt and shame. “Everyone get home okay?”
“They’re all in their beds, safe and sound.” Leo snorts. “And jealous as fuck of you.”
“Not you?” I know more than a few of the guys on our team are itching for something beyond the one-night stands I’m famous for. Something more permanent. And all signs are pointing to Leo and Maddie Miller having something permanent.
“My personal life is none of their business,” Leo snaps. “The less people know about me and Maddie’s relationship, the safer she’ll be.”
I’ve never seen Leo like this over a woman, and it takes me aback. It also worries me. “Has something else happened with her husband?”
“ Ex -fucking-husband.” Leo practically yells through the line. He’s loud enough Alexis hears and her brows climb her forehead in response.
Seems like she’s as surprised as I am over Leo’s outburst.
“Last night he started calling every five minutes. Maddie turned her phone off, and when she checked it this morning her voicemail was full.” Leo’s words are sharp. “If I ever get my hands on him again—”
“I think you should work on making sure that doesn’t happen.” I’m starting to see just how in over his head Leo is. Why Dan and Babs are so upset. “You should probably be as uninvolved in that mess as possible.”
Leo scoffs. “Are you fucking kidding me?” His voice amps up—both in pitch and in volume. “You’re supposed to be on my side, man.”
“I am on your side.” I keep my tone calm, like I’m placating a toddler. “I just know how easy it is to get tunnel vision when you care about someone.” My eyes drift to where Alexis stands, watching me with an odd look on her face. “It can lead to stupid decisions.”
I have zero room to judge him. Hell, I might as well be living in a glass house because I’m making my share of stupid decisions. And—like Leo—I can’t seem to stop.
“Keeping Maddie safe from that bastard will never be a stupid decision.” Leo sounds disgusted, but I don’t know if it’s with me or Maddie’s ex. “I gotta go.” He doesn’t say goodbye, just hangs up.
So he was disgusted with me then.
I release a slow breath, letting my head fall back. As if I hadn’t already fucked up enough, now I’ve made Leo feel even more alone.
“You didn’t say anything wrong.” Al’s words are gentle. Soft. “I know he feels like everyone’s against him, but he’ll figure out we’re not soon enough.” Alexis rests one hand in the center of my chest. “Give him some time to cool down. Once he does, he’ll realize you really are on his side.”
I drop my eyes to where Alexis stands in front of me. “Am I?” I motion around her apartment. “Because it looks a whole hell of a lot like I’m fucking around with his sister behind his back.” I scrub one hand over my face, as frustrated with myself and my situation as I am with Leo and his. “And he’s so wound up he’s going to lose his shit when he finds out.” The words are out of my mouth before I fully comprehend what I’m saying.
I didn’t say if . I said when . Like there is some sort of scenario where Leo can discover what’s going on. Like there’s some way I can have it all. The family I’ve claimed as my own. My best friend.
And Alexis.
I don’t think it’s possible. Especially not now.
But Alexis doesn’t seem bothered the way I am. She lifts one shoulder and lets it drop. “Like he said. What goes on in someone’s personal life is no one else’s business.” Her chin tips higher, making her look stunningly defiant. “And that includes us.”
Could it really be that simple? Can Alexis and I do what we want and keep it between us? “He did say that, didn’t he?”
Al’s lips curve into a slow smile. “Yes, he did.” Her smile turns into a snarl. “But I am kinda with him on wanting to get my hands on Maddie’s ex-husband. I’ve only met her a time or two, but she always seemed really sweet. I can’t imagine what sort of douche canoe would threaten someone like her.” Her eyes narrow, nostrils flaring. “I probably couldn’t do much, but I’m pretty sure I could stab at least one eyeball out.”
I start to chuckle, the vision of Alexis as a whirlwind of rage and violence way cuter than I will ever admit to her, but then my stomach drops.
Because I fucking forgot there’s a one-eyed lizard trapped in my bathroom.
“I gotta go.” This happens every fucking time. I get my hands on Alexis and everything else falls out of my fucking brain. All I see is her. All I want is her. All I think about is her. It’s hazardous for my health, my friendships, and now, my newly remodeled bathroom.
Alexis follows behind me, face filled with concern. “What’s wrong?”
I pause, turning to her so I can cradle her face in my hands. “It’s a long story, but there’s a five-foot long, one-eyed lizard in my bathroom, and I need to go take care of it.”
Al blinks at me a second, then she starts to laugh, wiping at the corner of one watering eye. After a few seconds, she sobers, brows pinching. “Oh my God. You’re serious.”
“Unfortunately, I am.” I lean in, catching her lips with mine in a kiss that escalates quickly. It takes everything I have to pull away, but it has to happen. Al and I might be able to keep this thing between us, but staying the night will still have very real consequences. As much as I want to hold her close and wake up to her sleepy face, I can’t leave Cilantro alone with Popeye the one-eyed dinosaur that long. Not when it could chew through the door for all I know.
But—
“You could come with me.” The offer slides free, and once it’s out there I hold my breath, anticipation and fear fighting for the upper hand.
So far it’s always been me coming to Alexis. Me showing up on her doorstep. Me seeking her out in the bar.
This would be her coming to me. With me. To my home.
To my bed.
Alexis blinks at me a few times, lips parted, blonde brows pinched in confusion. “You want me to come home with you?”
There’s too much surprise in her voice. It makes me wonder how she views this thing we’ve got going on. “I do.”
Alexis nibbles on her lower lip, uncertainty replacing the confusion that pinched her pretty face. “I’m not sure how I feel about dealing with your lizard.”
Al is a serious person. Has been forever. She’s not one to joke around, but she’s great at accidentally setting me up to tease her, and I’ve never been good at resisting it. Even now. “You don’t have to deal with my lizard. Promise.” I reach for her, pulling her close. “We can just cuddle.”
It takes a couple beats for her to get it, but then she snorts, rolling her eyes. It’s as amused as she gets, and after years of women fake laughing at anything I say, I soak up her honest reaction.
Then I can’t help but ask, “Is that a yes?”
Alexis shakes her head, but the exasperated look on her face tells me this is another contradictory reaction. “Fine.” She smooths one hand over the front of my shirt. “But I’m bringing a change of clothes.” Her eyes level on my face, a hint of a smile tipping her lips. “Just in case you get trigger happy.”
I let her go but flatten my palm at the small of her back to urge her in the direction of the bedroom. “You’re never going to let me live that down, are you?”
Alexis gives me an indignant look over one shoulder. “That dress was brand-new.”
I chuckle. “I guess I should have aimed for your scarf then since that thing is old as hell.”
Al’s steps come to a halt, her body stiffening the tiniest bit. Something I said was wrong, but I’m not sure how. “What’s the matter?”
Alexis peeks at me again over one shoulder, but this time she shakes her head. “Nothing.”
She’s shutting me out. It’s there in her closed-off expression. The flat line of her lips. Al’s reactions might not always be easy to read, but they do give her up eventually. Some faster than others.
This time they outed her at record speed.
I move toward her, not willing to accept her words. “Tell me.” It seems like Alexis likes to withhold information—like how she had a crush on me—and I don’t want secrets between us.
I don’t know if I could handle it.
She blows out a dramatic sigh, eyes lifting to the ceiling. “Fine.”
She crosses her arms in a way some people might read as irritation, but the hint of vulnerability that flashes across her face reveals the truth.
“My Grandma Dorothy made me that scarf.” She scowls at me. “So you better keep your fluids away from it.”