Chapter 8 - Sebastian
As difficult as it was to leave Lydia alone after our conversation seemed far from over, I knew I had no other choice. I was determined to honor her request, regardless of the many questions I still had for her.
She disappeared into the bedroom, and as much as I wanted to chase after her to defend myself more, I knew I couldn’t push. I had to give her time to decompress and understand the less-than-ideal situation she found herself in.
It seemed I, too, needed that time as I pushed out the back door of the cabin and found myself taking in deep breaths of fresh air while I tried not to let those lies get to me.
I couldn’t believe what Lydia had told me. That her parents twisted some false narrative about me and preached it to her like it was gospel. Because of it, she had some warped perception of me that was damning enough to fracture her trust in me.
I hated how it made me seem—how those lies made me out to be someone so unlike my true character.
Despite being a shifter and an alpha, I always did my best to maintain my integrity. I never wanted anyone to be able to say that I was a terrible alpha or that I didn’t keep the best interest of my pack in mind.
As I was a leader, I couldn’t stand the thought of taking advantage of my power and influence.
After hearing and witnessing some of the poor leadership my friends endured, I always knew I could never let myself cause the same pain for those who chose to follow me.
Above all else, I hated what those lies had done to Lydia. She was stuck between believing me or her parents—the very people who brought her into that pack in the first place, despite coming from a perfectly fine one.
At first, I struggled to understand why her parents would lie about me and my parents in the first place, but as I looked out into the woods around me, contemplating everything I knew about the situation, it eventually became perfectly clear.
For whatever reason, her parents wanted her to leave the pack to join Jack’s, but my parents tried their hardest to dissuade them after they heard some unsavory things about him. Because of this, they likely needed to paint my family in a bad light to indoctrinate Lydia as they had been.
Even if she couldn’t see it yet, that manipulation was incredibly effective, and as much as I didn’t want to admit it, they had been rather successful.
From what I could tell, they tried to use Lydia to get into Jack’s good graces. By being the parents of his Luna, they’d find themselves in a pretty comfortable position. Yet, I could only imagine Jack hoping to take advantage of their blind allegiance and their daughter.
Just like those shifters at the bar, she was likely nothing more than fresh meat to Jack. Even with what little knowledge I had about him, the characterization didn’t seem so farfetched. He was an older man with a nasty habit of preying on young women, and that was all I needed to know.
My hands balled into fists at my sides as that notion crossed my mind. It took everything in my power not to let that anger get the better of me. I hated the idea of anyone taking advantage of Lydia—enough to make my blood boil and make me wish I could have the chance to put Jack in his place.
But before even considering pursuing that idea, I knew I had to make amends with Lydia first. I needed to convince her I wasn’t the brutal monster her parents painted me out to be.
I didn’t kill anyone for my status, which would never change.
The past we shared, regardless of the outcome, was the driving force behind my desire to fix things and my new attraction to her. Despite her old, awkward self, there was something magnetic about her now. I was drawn to her, and the thought of knowing she might find herself in a precarious situation because of her alpha and parents didn’t sit right with me.
Regardless of those new feelings sprouting within me, I wanted to prove to Lydia that I was still the man she used to know, even if that time felt increasingly more distant.
I needed to correct that narrative, regardless of what it might take. She deserved to know the truth and to know that I was on her side.
After meandering around the cabin for a while, offering Lydia as much space as she required, I eventually made my way back inside and settled on the couch with a book while dusk set in.
To my surprise, she emerged from the bedroom not long after, looking torn yet somewhat more adjusted than before. I wasn’t sure if I had imagined it, but her eyes also showed curiosity as she sat down on one of the armchairs.
As much as I wanted to pick up where we left off, I reminded myself to be patient. I needed to let her come to me and initiate if that was what she wanted. There was no point in pushing her further away from me.
I acknowledged her briefly before I continued reading, allowing a gentle silence to fill the space between us.
She remained quiet, only letting go of the occasional contemplative breath.
It was perfectly fine. Perfectly normal. But as it stretched on and I found myself too focused on what her parents had twisted about me to digest what I was reading properly, I knew I couldn’t take much more of it.
With resolve, I put the book down and met her gaze, catching it as she looked at me at the same time. It almost seemed like a nod to our past as the faintest blush filled her cheeks. That new but welcomed sensation pulsed within my chest at the thought.
At that moment, I knew I couldn’t let her go on, assuming I was something I wasn’t.
“It might be hard for you to believe right now, but I can assure you I never killed anyone to get my title. I never even contemplated it,” I began, hoping to set the record straight before her mind could go too wild with assumptions. “I could never hurt someone so coldly, especially not an alpha I respected, and certainly not you, Lydia. I know I can’t show you that within a day, but I hope I can prove it over time if you allow me to.”
In contrast to her previous demeanor, Lydia maintained eye contact with me, not wavering as she took it all in. “How did you become an alpha then?”
With a nod, I easily recalled the memories. “Even though I was more than willing to follow the old alpha, I couldn’t ignore my own urge to lead. But rather than challenging him, I decided to leave and start a pack of my own. It was the best way to fulfill that need and keep the peace with the others,” I explained, watching Lydia visibly relax. “Some of the others decided to follow me, but many stayed because they thought I was too young and inexperienced to lead. So, I went off with those who believed in me and started something of my own. I’ve been supporting the pack with the tech firm I co-founded with a few of my buddies ever since.”
The visible softening in her features, while minute, was enough for me to pick up on. Regardless of what she wanted to believe I had done, it seemed she couldn’t ignore the truth in my words after all.
“Oh,” she began, pulling her legs in as she sat there, mauling over the details I laid out. “That’s…a lot more respectable than I was led to believe.”
I nodded, understanding how deep that indoctrination likely went, not pressing much further. “I know there isn’t much I can do to prove that to you, but you’ll have to take my word for it. I don’t have it in me to senselessly kill like that.”
As she considered it more, Lydia let go of a deep sigh as she scrubbed a hand down her face. “Honestly, I never wanted to believe what my parents were telling me, but they had been so persistent. They…they really made me think you’d do something nasty.”
“It’s not your fault for believing them,” I reassured her, keeping my tone light and free of judgment for her sake.
“I know, but…I did notice a shift in them when they suddenly brought up wanting to join Jack’s pack,” she confessed, meeting my eyes with regret in hers. “I was too young to understand what was happening, and I trusted them to keep our best interest in mind. At the time, I hoped I was just overreacting, but now…I can’t just ignore it anymore.” Her courage to confront the truth, despite the fear, was truly inspiring.
“I’m glad you got out when you did, at least. Even if you’ve found yourself in a tough situation.”
Lydia nodded absently as she looked down at the floor, allowing those anxious thoughts to pass through her eyes. Almost bitterly, she scoffed and shook her head. Her voice was just above a whisper as she murmured, “I have no idea what I’m going to do. You were right before—I can’t go back right now. I can only imagine the discipline that would be waiting for me. But regardless of the punishment that might be ahead of me, it beats being Jack’s Luna.”
The reminder instilled in me a sense of duty I couldn’t shake. I looked at her with unwavering sincerity. “I won’t let you face any kind of punishment for choosing to follow what you felt was right, Lydia. Even if it puts me in the middle of everything, I’ll do it to keep you away from that creep.” My promise was as solid as the ground beneath us, offering her the reassurance she needed.
Her features softened even more at my words, and she even let a small smile slip. “As much as I don’t want to admit it right now, I had the time to think about it, and I feel safer here than back with him.” Her relief was palpable, bringing a sense of comfort to the room.
In response to her acceptance, I mirrored that gentle grin and felt as my emotions settled. My heart even squeezed at the thought. “I understand. You can stay here for as long as you need. There’s no rush.”
While we didn’t exactly start on the right foot, it seemed Lydia was beginning to come around to me after all, and it certainly felt like a step in the right direction.