16. Sixteen
Sixteen
Cash
“You found him!” Stetson came running up to us once we got Marshmallow back to the stable, Kyla not far from him. “You really found him!”
“Of course we did. He didn’t go far.” I swung my leg over Nova and let my boots sink into the ground. Before I could turn, I felt Stetson’s arms wrap around my waist, squeezing as tight as he could. Glancing up at Abi, still on Twinkie, I noticed the small grin that brushed her lips.
The ride back after finding Marshmallow had been silent. I probably pushed too many buttons, but I could hear in her voice there was something else there, that I was spot on with my suspicion there was more to her ‘I do.’ But she needed to know I saw her.
It baffled me that others who lived with her didn’t notice anything. Maybe their attention was all on Lachlan after everything he went through, but Abi was still right there. Hurting. Grieving something that still lingered. There were a number of things it could have been—the ranch, Stetson’s little stint, loneliness in general. But whatever it was, I didn’t want her to hide from it anymore. Especially not from me.
Abi dismounted Twinkie, her smile widening as she saw Stetson’s look once he let go of me.
“He was right by the lake.” She touched her son’s back. “Cash knew exactly where to go.”
“Can we go on a ride?” Stetson looked up at me, hope gleaming in his eyes as he ran to his horse.
Raising my brow, I turned to Abi, as if to say, And he thought he would never ride again . Abi gave me a slight grin, raising her shoulder as her eyes fluttering closed.
“How about”—I gave my attention to Stetson—“We get him cleaned up, out of his saddle, and see how he feels?”
Stetson’s grin widened. “I’ll go get the buckets and hose.”
Taking Marshmallow’s reins from me, he led his horse inside the stable. I watched, turning back to Abi as soon as he made it to the washing stall. Shoving my hands in my pockets, I never broke eye contact with her.
“Are you ok?” The question had zero meaning. I knew she wasn’t. There were so many other ways I could ask how she was, but yet I settled with that.
Her shoulders rose and she inhaled, nodding with her exhale. “I’m great. Thanks for your help.”
She walked away, opening her arms to give Kyla a hug the moment they met up. Rhett gave me a wave as he let his wife and sister in the house. And I was alone, trying to read Abi as she walked away from me.
“I thought you said you weren’t going to ride again?” I asked when I watched Stetson use the mounting steps to hoist himself up on Marshmallow.
“I never said that.” Stetson situated himself on the saddle, grabbing onto the reins tightly. He was on the horse, but he was as stiff as a board.
The kid had somehow convinced me to let him up on the saddle after brushing down Marshmallow. A bath could wait. Stetson wanted to ride. So, we were going to ride. Stetson was determined, brushing the horse down and making sure he had plenty of snacks before resaddling him. Even Marsh looked excited to ride, bobbing his head up and down after each step.
“Your exact words were ‘I’m never getting a horse again.’” I air quoted.
“Are you going to take a ride with me, or am I going alone?” Stetson looked at me, and at that moment he was his father. His eyebrows raised to the rim of his hat, the smug look on his face one I had seen many times when I had told Sylas no to something. And I had to tell Sylas no a lot.
The resemblance made me laugh. I missed Sylas everyday, but here he was in his boy.
“Oh, I’m going with you,” I grumbled. “You’ll fall off again.”
“No I won’t.” He glowered at me.
“Give me a minute to get Nova. Good thing I kept her saddle on, and we aren’t going to go far. I have a training session this afternoon.”
“You’ll stay for dinner, right?”
“Sure will. I’ll never turn down your grandma’s cooking.” I hoisted myself up on Nova and looked at Stetson, who was still sitting on Marshmallow as if he had no idea what he was doing. He was holding onto the leather so tight , his knuckles were turning white. “You gotta loosen up.” I said, bringing Nova up to his side. “Marsh can tell you’re stiff. He can feel your unease—”
“I’m not stiff.”
“Stet, you fell off that horse less than twenty-four hours ago. I wouldn’t blame you for being stiff, but now, your horse can tell.” I rolled my shoulders in demonstration. “Loosen your body, let him know you’re comfortable in that saddle.”
Stetson copied my motion, watching me intently. I rolled my neck. He rolled his. I arched my back. He arched his. I moved my ankles, then so did he. I dropped the reins and wiggled my arms. He did the same. Picking up the reins I laughed, shaking my head as I urged Nova forward.
“What’s so funny? I’m loosening up.” Stetson kicked Marsh forward. He moved with a jerk, causing Stetson to stiffen once again. “Whoa, boy.”
“Don’t say ‘whoa.’” I pointed at him, glad that Marshmallow missed the command. “That’s his cue to stop right?”
“Yeah…”
“Do you want him to stop?”
Stetson looked at the large horse under him, and then at me, his brows pinched. “Yes.” He hesitated. “Maybe. No.” He took a deep breath. “I want to ride.”
“Then let’s ride.” I kicked Nova into a trot, hoping Stetson would follow. When I heard the hooves behind me hitting the Earth, I laughed. There was no way this kid would let his horse stand there while I trotted away.
Marshmallow caught up to me in no time, Stetson seeming a little more relaxed.
“There ya go.” I watched, slowing my mare down just a fraction, allowing Stetson to set the pace. “Now, where to?”
“The lake?” Stetson suggested, already turning Marsh in that direction.
“Lead the way.”
We made it there in record time, running into Lachlan and a few of the ranch hands along the way. We sat and rested the horses while we ate the granola bars I had shoved in my saddle bag, and once those were done, Lachlan wrangled both of us into helping fix a fence that got knocked down during the winter.
Keeping a close eye on the time, knowing Quinn would arrive sooner rather than later, I held the pole as Stetson helped nail the board into it. You would never have guessed this kid fell off his horse just yesterday. He was favoring one leg, that was for sure, but he was running, laughing and working just as hard as if nothing had happened. He got back on the horse and worked double time.
Watching him only made me want to get back to the arena. Maybe another ride was in the cards for tonight.
Maybe I could convince Abi to help at the chute again.
I would want Abi there; she would have to be there. Either at the chute when I nodded my head, or when I was jumping off the horse after the eight seconds were up. I knew I needed to see her there. She inspired me that night, she urged me to do something I’d be too afraid to do. And she allowed me to hold her, to feel something I hadn’t felt in years. With every single interaction since, even when she wasn’t paying much attention to me, I felt it.
In my mind, I was playing out Quinn’s timeline. We’ve been here for three weeks, almost four. Her injury was starting to heal. Her PT was going strong, and with the added acupuncture appointments, her limp was gone. With every training session, she got stronger, and soon she would be back at full speed. We had four, maybe six weeks left of training here before we were back on the road and in the circuit. My to-do list with her was about to get longer, and all I could think were ways I could extend the time here.
I wasn’t ready to leave Hartwell Hills just yet. I wasn’t ready to leave Abi.
Were these old feelings creeping up a little too fast? Possibly. I wasn’t even sure Abi would entertain this—she’s been so hot and cold, but I still felt it, and a part of me was hoping she was feeling it, too. Even if it was friendship again, I felt the connection. My chest would swell just with the thought of her. I didn’t want to force anything down anymore; I wanted to keep feeling this.
We made it back to the ranch just in time to see Quinn saddling up Hook. I gave her drills to do as I got Nova unsaddled, helping Stetson with Marshmallow as well. Once our horses were settled in the sun with the others, both of us headed back into the arena.
He was my little shadow today.
“You know where you keep the barrels?” I asked him, pushing the gate to the arena open. My boot hit the dirt, forcing my heel back, and a small sting shot up my left leg. I winced slightly. “I only know where one is.”
“We have two more. I’ll go grab one.” He took off to the left, his arm flying up to his head to grab his hat as he ran.
“Who’s the kid?” I heard Quinn come up, slightly out of breath and she approached on Hook, bringing him to a complete stop.
“That’s Stetson, Abi’s son.” I took off my hat, rubbing my free hand through my short hair before placing the hat back on my head, raising my chin just in time to see Stetson open up the tackle shed and disappearing inside.
“Abi? I didn’t know she had a kid,” Quinn questioned, her gaze turning to the shed where Stetson began to make way more noise than I was comfortable with.
“Yeah, I’ve known that kid since he was born. He’s a good one, and apparently...” I saw a barrel roll out of the shed. “He wants to help today.”
Quinn laughed. “Alright. Give the kid the stopwatch, and he can time me.”
“We’re taking it slow today.”
“Hell no.” Quinn chuckled. “I want to move, so we’re gonna move.”
“Slowly.”
Quinn’s chuckle grew as she kicked Hook, shooting him off into a gallop.
“Slow, Quinn!” I shouted.
“Two barrels!” Stetson’s voice echoed in the arena as he rolled the two barrels onto the dirt. “I know where to put them!”
“Sure kid!” Quinn came up next to him. “Go for it.”
Stetson tipped his hat to Quinn before rolling the barrels in the right spot. Chuckling, I went and grabbed the further barrel, closest to the chute, placing it at the top of the triangle. I motioned for Stetson to come with me back to the gate.. He ran, the dirt flying up behind his boots.
“You roped him into helping you?” Abi’s voice sang in my ears as I approached the gate. She stepped up on the railing, her arms folded out in front of her. “I bet he’s thrilled.”
“It was his idea.” The corners of my lips tugged when I saw her smile.
“Oh, I bet. That kid has been begging to come in here with you. First the roof, and now this. He loves this place.” She flipped her hair, rolling her shoulders as she moved a little closer to me.
She was biting her bottom lip slightly, holding the smile as her eyes began to search mine for a brief moment before she snapped her gaze away.
I had always—always—found Abi beautiful. Her blue eyes sparkled, and now that I knew there were specks of dark blue nestled there. I had to stop myself from shifting my body close to hers to see them again. The Cupid's bow I noticed the other day was stretched with her smile, but still clearly visible. Perfectly kissable.
Wait…
What?
Did I just think about kissing Abi?
In the many years I’ve known her, I’ve only thought about kissing her once…and that was before I knew who she was. That was before Sylas appeared at her side. Sure, I had kissed her temple a few times during hugs, but kissing her…really truly kissing her, a knee-weakening, toe curling kiss…that was a thought I knew I couldn’t have.
But now, all I wanted to do was lift her chin and kiss her.
Deeply. I wanted to feel her lips against mine. Were they as soft as they looked? I longed to taste her. Did she taste like honey or cinnamon? Would she lead the kiss, or would she let me guide it and take her? Would her hands find the nape of my neck? Would she let me run my fingers through her hair? The biggest question…would I let her go?
Taking a deep, shaky breath, I turned my back to her, leaning on the railing so I could talk with her but not look at her lips. I cleared my throat.
“Rhett hasn’t trained in a bit; I thought I’d at least see him on Buckle in this arena once.”
I heard her laugh, and my stomach flipped. Yeah, it was a good thing I wasn’t looking at her.
“Lachlan is keeping him very busy. He doesn’t have time to train. He’s taking the year off, but I know he’s wanting to get back in next year… He needs to keep up his training.”
“I’ll get him back on that horse. Speaking of…I was thinking about doing another run tonight, and I was hoping you’d be there. Maybe we can convince Rhett to do a ride after me?” I turned, thinking the moment of wanting to kiss her was gone.
Nope. There she was.
She was so close. All I had to do was close the gap between us, and my lips would be on hers. An entire new door would be open to us, a wall would be broken down. My gaze dropped to her lips, lingering for a moment too long before I flicked my eyes back up. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say she was blushing.
I blinked.
I knew better.
Clearing my throat…again…I turned back towards Quinn as she told Stetson how her runs would work.
“I’ll be there. Rhett too. I’ll have Lachlan grab a calf—or two.”
“I would love it if you were there, at the chute again?” I met her gaze, waiting for her answer.
“I’ll be at chute.” She nodded, her arms stretching out once again before she pulled herself back. Her attention went back to her son. Her eyes blinked rapidly as it was her turn to clear her throat. Not only did I want to kiss her, but I wanted to know what was racing through her mind. “So tonight? Maybe we can even get Lachlan on a horse.” Her voice rose.
“Ha,” I laughed. “That won’t happen.”
“Hey, I got you on a horse. I may be able to work some more magic.” She shrugged a shoulder. “I’ll be in the stable if you need me. I have another trainer coming to look at the space, Wyatt is helping me.” She jumped from the gate, her boots hitting with a thud.
“I didn’t know Wyatt was back.” I questioned, twisting my torso, catching her just in time to see her spin on her heel.
“He got in last night so…” She pointed at me. “I told him to put his big boy pants on, you do the same.”
Cocking an eyebrow up, I twisted my lips, folding my arms over my chest. “You know he’s the one who hates me right?”
She chuckled. “I say it’s a mutual hatred. I know you don’t care for him.” She took a step towards me and mimicked my stance, her lips twitched as she kept a smile at bay.
We stared at each other, neither one moving as we tried to figure out the other. I was easy to read; I was sure of it. I knew I was looking at her like I wanted more, keeping our eyes locked together. You hear people talk about a tug to the person they love the most. A magnetic feeling that guides you to them and keeps you there, grounds you, and makes everything whole. With the way she was looking at me now, the way I knew I was looking at her…it was there. That pull.
And it was strong.
My gaze dropped to her lips at the exact moment they parted, and a small sigh left her lungs.
“Uncle Cash!” I jumped, breaking the contact to look at Stetson as he ran at full speed towards us. “Miss Quinn said I could keep the time! Can I have the timer?” Stetson was completely out of breath once he made it to me, his hand outstretched for the stopwatch I had shoved in my back pocket.
“Remind her to go slow.” I added, handing in the stopwatch.
He took off, heading to the end of the arena where he would meet Quinn.
“He’s going to want to do this all the time with you, you know that right?” She paused, my attention fully on her once again. She looked at her boot, the tip of her toe digging into the dirt for a brief second because she flipped her hair, her bright blue eyes hitting me with force. “Hey, um…” Her voice was heavy as she worked through the words. “Thank you, for last night, and this morning and taking Stetson for a ride and just…”
I reached up, using my thumb to gently touch her jaw line, drawing a soft line there. The contact was quick, but warm all the same, and created tingles that were now finding their way up my arm. “Of course Abs. I’m here, you know that. For Stet…for you.”
She inhaled a shaky quick breath before she gave me a single nod. “I know, thank you.” Then she turned on her heels again. Keeping her chin down, she hurried into the stables, leaving me feeling that zing in my fingers.