Chapter 25 Burnout #2
“That’s why we deh yah, when unuh wah get in more trouble, we as the woman always hold unuh back,” Anna adds, and I nod. Gutta smiles at her.
Nickoi stays silent, jaw tight. Mi know him nuh like wah wi a seh, enuh.
That night, leaving his father’s party, my mind was heavy with questions.
First, Juaqína, because I overheard his mom saying she was his first baby mother.
That lingered, the way it felt like a shadow over him.
Plus, I saw them arguing outside. I decided to tuck it away, I didn’t bring it up again.
But what weighed heavier was Nickoi’s mood before and during the party.
I knew why he was so restless, so desperate for me, to hold onto something that could distract him.
That’s why I gave in. Yuh love jook too, the voice in my head teases.
When we got home that night, I asked him what was wrong until he told me his drugs were missing.
The next day, he went underground, checked cameras, found out it was Wayne.
Me? Glad a never none a him close friends.
Nickoi wanted to kill him, but I begged for the man’s life.
That’s the only reason he’s alive. Wayne’s story made sense, he said Lennox had a gun to his head and took the drugs.
Nickoi searched for Lennox after, but they didn’t find him. So for now, things are calm.
I guess…
“Him good man,” Nickoi says. One thing about him, when Nickoi say suh’m good, he usually means the opposite.
I touch him gently. “Okay, take your mind off that. What’s done is done. And after all, we have a special moment coming up. I want you happy there.”
“Mi a go happy deh, man,” he says.
“Good,” I smile. He catches my eyes in the rearview mirror before looking back at the road. I sip the milkshake again, sweetness grounding me. Pulling up to the house, I spot a red Audi in the yard. I glance at him with a question, and he squeezes my hand, steadying me as I step out.
“Who is it, yuh Aunty?” I ask, and he nods. Gutta and Anna step out behind us. Nickoi opens the door, and my heart kicks faster. I’m about to find out the baby’s gender and I don’t know if I’m ready. Jesus, why mi heart a beat so fast!?
Inside, I see Gavin, Mama, and Nickoi’s Aunt sitting together, voices low, smiles warm. Nickoi walks in ahead of me.
“Welcome!” Doctor Jacobs greets warmly. Everyone answers back.
“Watch har with har cute self,” Gavin says, making me smile.
“Mi nervous,” I admit sheepishly. Laughter spills around the room.
“But must a yuh first baby, enuh,” Gutta says, and Anna gently pulls him back.
“Hey, good day,” Anna greets again, and they respond.
“Hi, good day,” Gavin says, sneaking a glance at Gutta. I know he’s thinking about Sash. I smile quietly, looking away.
“No need fi yuh be nervous, mi gyal. Yuh mother deh pan the phone,” Mama says, holding up the phone with a grin, and I smile too.
“Hey, mi one gyal,” my mom’s voice comes soft and sweet.
“Hey mommy,” I say, sliding my hands around Nickoi’s waist, resting my head on him. Awww… so sweet.
“Mi nuh care what kind of baby enuh. Mi just well wah know mi grand baby so mi can start shop,” mommy admits.
“Yes, me too,” Mama agrees.
Nickoi is quiet. I can’t tell if he’s nervous.
He’s not.
“I want a girl, and Nickoi wants a son,” I say, smiling at him. You love him, enuh girl. He looks back with a small smile, wrapping his arms around me, his hand gentle on my belly.
“Soo it’s time to see the gender,” Doctor Jacobs says, and the room buzzes with anticipation.
“Cyaa wait,” Mama says. I squeeze Nickoi’s hand tighter, nerves twisting inside me. Mi nuh bother wah know the gender right now.“How we doing it?” I ask.
“Well, you know Mari always likes to be different. I told him he could get the black balloon, put the powder inside, and you burst it, but he came up with something even better,” she says, eyes twinkling, and excitement fills the room.
“Wah the G come up wid now?” Gutta asks, grinning. Nickoi laughs.
“Mi nervous,” I chuckle, following them outside. Gavin and Mama walk beside me, while Nickoi, Gutta, and Dr. Jacobs lead ahead. Gavin already has his phone out, videoing.
“Hey, mi affi ketch this yah moment yah.” I laugh.
“Nuh true… sen it come gimme after,” Mommy says.
“How mi fi miss it?” Gavin keeps the energy high.
“And yes, Aunty, mi a go sen yuh but mek mi check if the old phone have space, cause if it shut down pan mi, it mek a sad mistake,” he jokes.
Him nuh ramp enuh. Nickoi and Gutta step closer to Doctor Jacobs.
She chuckles, stepping back as she pulls an envelope from her bag.
She tilts it, smiling wide before meeting our eyes.
“I had to double check because we did do the ultrasound and just gave it to the balloon artist.” Ohhh.
“So you didn’t know the gender?” Gavin asks.
She shakes her head. “No, I made my assistant look at it,” she says, smiling. The only one who knows the secret, and that smile makes my stomach twist. Mi nervous bad bad! Nickoi looks calm, more than calm, like he’s holding the whole room steady.
“Dawg a wah likkle youth mi would a wah see eno,” Gutta says, hitting his hand and Nickoi chuckles.
“Yuh know,” he smirks. My mother is quiet on the phone now her silence heavy. I know she’s nervous, too, like Gavin and Mama.
“The time is here,” Gavin hums, and Gutta looks at him, then back to Doctor Jacobs. Laad Jesus.
“Alright, so starting with mommy, how you feeling?” the doctor asks me, and I smile.
“I-I’m nervous,” I laugh, biting my lip. Nickoi bites his lip too, eyes on me. Whew.
“So you think it’s a girl?” she asks. I nod slowly.
“I’m not even sure.” Laughter bubbles around.
“Yuh affi sure, man,” Gutta says.
“Just make a guess,” the doctor says, and I glance at Gavin who gives me a reassuring smile.
“Yes… mi think it’s a girl,” I blush.
“Nickoi?” she asks, looking at him. He scans around us then smiles back at his aunt.
“Big woman thing a wah son mi a look fawud to, but it nuh really matter cause a still heart a love.”
“No joke, fam,” Gutta says, then they murmur ‘Awwz ’ around me.
“Mi just want know the gender, enuh, cause even if a save, mi affi save fi buy a nice gift fi him or her, mi a dweet,” Gavin says, making us chuckle. Him eva affi save. Once everyone shares their predictions, the attention shifts to Mama.
“Mi think seh a boy, enuh,” she chuckles.
“Yuh feel so, mommy?” my mother asks. Gavin shakes his head no.
“No, Aunty, mi feel seh is a girl,” Gavin speculates. I smile, he’s rooting for me. Yuh think him easy?
“Alright, let’s get ready,” she says, pulling out two black bags, handing them to Gutta and Nickoi. He looks at me.
“So unuh a go stay over yasso yuh zi mi and mi a go do the burnout,” he says.
“Alright,” we nod. Burnout him go? My subconscious jumps.
Yup! Gutta and Nickoi walks away, and everyone bursts into chatter, but I stay silent, eyes locked on Nickoi.
Anna squeezes my hand, she knows I’m nervous.
“Watch Zara,” Gavin teases. Gutta sets the bags behind the wheel.
Gavin moves to the side for a better angle on his video.
“The time is now, mi gyal!” he chuckles. Nickoi slides into the Jaguar, engine growling low. I shift awkwardly, focus on the back of the car. The tires spin fast, burnout starting, but the car doesn’t move. I smirk. He’s good at everything he does, turning me on every time. Wrong timing, lady.
Mr. Joe steps out with a wide smile. The smoke at the back curls thick, white and heavy, billowing upward in slow waves.
Then, almost like magic, like the breath of hope itself, the white smoke begins to blush, soft pink tendrils weaving through the mist, glowing gently and warm against the sky. My hand rises to my lips.
“Hold up the phone, Mommy,” Mommy says, voice shaking with excitement on the line. Gavin and Anna are the first to scream ‘‘Yes!’.
“Oh my God!” My mouth falls open. “Oh my God!” I scream again, louder.
“It’s a girl!” Anna hits Gavin, laughing as he keeps filming.
“A wah girl!” Gavin squeals, jumping in joy. Girl! Yes, thank you God!
“A wah granddaughter mi get?!” Mommy screams and Mama nods proudly.
“God is good!” Mama smiles, tears bright in her eyes.
I smile, tears prickling at the corners, fighting to hold them back but failing.
I watch as Nickoi steps out of the car, that smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth, eyes locked on the fading pink smoke curling softly in the air.
I run to him, arms wrapping around his waist, my lips finding his in a kiss full of everything, hope, love, relief.
I stand on my tiptoes, hands tracing his face, staring deep into his eyes as I pull away.
“It’s a girl, Nickoi,” I whisper, and a tear slips free down my cheek.