Chapter Fifteen #2
The stroll in the park set the tone for the rest of the day and Lucinda was able to relax and enjoy her time with Lord Dunstan.
She noticed he did not buy an atlas; maybe Marianne was right.
Perhaps he was following her so he could spend more time with her.
The fact that he may be seeking to be in her presence was new to her and it made her smile.
Perhaps being the wife of such a man would not be so bad.
It was late. Tony, travel weary, went to his study to figure out the best way to break the news to Lucinda about her grandfather.
He did not want a repeat of when he gave her the portraits of her parents.
So, he needed to prepare himself for both reactions.
What if she didn’t want to meet her grandfather?
Did he just drag an old man all the way to London with a yearning to replace himself in her life?
To what lengths would he go to deny his own feelings and desires for her?
If she wanted to meet him, could she forget about Tony and turn her attention and affections to her grandfather?
Part of him wanted that to be the case. He would go on as he had before.
His promise to Markham would be complete once she got married.
Part of him dreaded the thought of watching her leave him for good, knowing he could have had her as his own.
He heard the commotion in the foyer. He heard his mother’s voice clearly echoing down the hall.
“A stroll in the park this afternoon and then three dances with Lord Dunstan tonight, Lucinda. It is only a matter of time before the earl comes to ask you for your hand. The fact that he braves our parlor every day lately shows his commitment to you.”
“Do you think so? He has become more attentive and asks me more about myself. The problem is I hardly know who I am myself.”
“Surely that is not so,” Marianne said. “I can tell you what I know about you.”
“That is what you see, but who am I deep down? Am I being selfish by wanting a husband just so he will give me something I have not had in such a long time? Is marrying a man for the family he can give me enough of a reason?”
“Oh, my dear, did you have too much Madeira tonight? I have never heard you talk about yourself with so much agitation. Let me be clear that marriages have taken place for more selfish reasons than having a family. Is it simply because your dreams might just come true and now you are second guessing yourself?”
“I guess so. I just do not want to do the wrong thing for either of us.”
Tony could hear the falter in Lucinda’s voice and the urge to go to her had him striding to the door. His sister’s voice stopped him from making himself known to the trio.
“Such big decisions require careful thought. Should we write a list of all the things you like about Dunstan and then another with all your fears and see if any of them connect? You may be surprised to find that what you fear has nothing to do with Lord Dunstan at all.”
The sound of their feet on the stairs indicated they were going upstairs.
He shook his head and gave a small laugh as he reentered his study.
He did not know what he would have said had he made himself known.
His sister, always full of helpful ideas, had done her best to ease Lucinda’s apprehension.
Tony did not give Marianne enough credit for keeping the family on track, even though she had spent most of the last few weeks telling him of his deficiencies. He could not deny that his actions of late were… not his usual self-controlled ones. And he could not wholly blame Lucinda either.
Opening the brandy decanter, he poured a measure and sat heavily in his chair by the fire.
The flames in the grate reminded him of Lucinda’s fiery hair.
Hair that he wanted wild and untamed fanned out on a pillow on his bed.
Oh, lord. He was doomed. He had had numerous affairs with women, and none had touched his heart.
A lot had been a means to an end, a source of information, part of a mission.
Blast it, but he wanted her. If only he had never kissed her.
If only he had not tasted the temptation that was Lucinda Sterling.
The Duke of Warrington frowned over his desk at Tony. “Her grandfather? Are you sure this is a good idea?”
“I hope it is. She has yearned for family and here he is. I have delivered him on a silver platter for her.” His brother’s frown deepened, and Tony looked to his mother for support.
“Dearest,” she said. “I really think you should tell her first. She does not fare well when she is unprepared.”
“Yes. You are right. It needs to be private. I do not wish her to be embarrassed. I want her to be able to say no.”
Warrington raised an eyebrow. “Does Shorten know she may say no?”
“He does.”
“Then you must tell her, and it must be today. The longer you keep this from her the worse it may be for you if she finds out.”
“I do know that. I just wanted to make you both aware of what I had planned so you don’t walk in on us unaware.”
“We will be having callers so I suggest you take her for a carriage ride so you can be alone. I am sure Lord Dunstan will understand if she is not here. I will just say she had a pressing matter to attend to.”
He kissed his mother on the cheek. “Thank you, Mother. I will go and see her now. Do you know where she is?”
“I believe she is in the summer house, tinkering with that picture of hers.” Warrington indicated out the window towards the garden.