Chapter 16 #2
As we walk through the quiet streets to the trail Abbott told me about, I let the sounds of birds chirping as they wake up wash over me.
I know people are important, but I could be happy being a spinster I think.
No pack, just the freedom to go wherever I want, surrounded by flowers and my favorite things.
It would give me time to explore what those things are, at least. My life is stifled, sad, and boring.
“There it is again,” Cassidy hisses at me.
“What?” I ask, wide eyed. “Where is what again?”
“You,” she says, grabbing my hand and pulling me aside just enough to give us some privacy. I’ve heard there are alphas with great hearing, so it probably won’t do much. “Did you know your scent changes when you’re sad? ”
“I’m not sad,” I reply. “I just get stuck in my head sometimes and it’s not particularly pleasant.”
“That’s the same thing!” Abbott calls out, proving my theory.
Oh, for fuck’s sake.
“Just ignore it,” I suggest. “It’ll pass.”
Walking faster, I wrap my arm around myself to get some space. Maybe this isn’t a great idea. They all seem to see too much. Taking a deep breath of fragrant air, I tell myself to bury it. I can’t just walk back home so I can hide because I’ll look even crazier than I already am.
Cassidy catches up to me easily, but I ignore her. I’d rather soak up every second I’m allowed outside until I’m locked inside again with my mother.
Abbott is true to his word, and as we walk down to the trail, the sun begins to rise over the lake. My smile is real as I stop to watch it, and I sigh happily at how pretty it is.
“Experiencing the world through you is incredible,” Abbott says, gazing at me. “It doesn’t feel as if you take anything for granted.”
“I don’t, because I’ve learned not to,” I explain. It says so much and yet not enough.
“Can I ask a question?” he asks. “The way you interact with the world is like someone who was sick and couldn’t go out for a long time.”
“Or like a prisoner,” Cassidy sighs.
“The answer is somewhere in the middle, I guess,” I say.
“I would say you’re a brat that needs taming, but I really don’t think you mean to be,” she grumbles.
Down the recesses of my memory, something twinges, but I don’t know why.
“Too many truths are dangerous for me,” I state. “Seriously, take my word for it.”
“Well, we’re going to keep you as busy as possible,” Abbott decides. “My pack may or may not be in a group chat with the others from the day we met you. ”
“Now that doesn’t sound ominous at all,” I tease him.
“Shh, Little Brat,” he teases, picking up the nickname. “Typically, courting an omega is competitive, and full of posturing. You don’t need to say anything either way, but we’ve made it our mission to get you away from your mother.”
“It’s kind of like a weird bromance,” Cassidy teases. “They really are all growly and adorable about it. Alright, look, we’re done for now. We want you to know you’re not as alone as you think you are. Now get your cute ass moving.”
Chuckling, I jerk into motion as I move into a jog and then a run.
I love the way the world blurs as I run, and the breeze moves over me.
My shirt is sticking to my skin, but I don’t mind it.
I feel as if I’m chasing something I need.
Running is where my mind empties of everything, and calm washes over me.
My feet keep moving, my legs reminding me of my limitations, but I keep going even as my chest heaves. The alphas keep pace with me, some ahead or beside me, doing exactly what they said they’d do.
Keeping me protected in the middle of a makeshift pack of people. I feel safe, and just able to do what I need to. I’m not being suffocated by them, I can’t even smell any of them, though I can see here and there that the sweat is also pouring off of them.
I’m still completely nose blind, the pollen in the trees making my sinuses swell worse than normal. It doesn’t hurt, it’s just another reminder of how much Weeping Willow’s torture has impacted me.
I’ll never be the same, always fractured in a way that’ll make people uncomfortable around me. I can’t even be broken in peace, since apparently my scent betrays me. It’s just not fair.
Gasping for breath, I begin to slow down, mindful of the people around me. Finding a hole to slip out of the circle, I come to a stop, leaning forward on my knees as I gasp for breath.
“You made it two and half miles,” Cassidy says, glancing at her watch .
They’re all jogging in place, and I smile.
“I think it helps to have someone to pace with,” I wheeze. “I just need a breather so I don’t collapse. I’m really out of shape.”
“I think you’re well on your way to fixing that,” Cassidy says, winking at me.
An alpha steps out of the group with dirty blonde hair and a worried look. “I’ll hang with her, guys,” he says. “She should get some water in her and rest.”
I don’t know him, and I figured they would argue with him, but shockingly, no one does.
“We’ll catch you on the loop back around, Nina,” Abbott says. “Oh, shit. This is Ellis Taylor. He’s a good alpha. You’re in good hands with him.”
I’m too out of breath to say anything, and too well trained by my voice coach to try when I’m fighting to stay upright. Fuck me and social etiquette. They’re running again before I can even try, leaving me to guzzle down water.
“Do you want to sit or walk?” Ellis asks. “There’s no right answer by the way. When you’ve run as hard as you were, you want different things.”
Fuck, I’m going to need to talk.
“Walk,” I croak out, wincing.
He doesn’t judge me for how rough I sound or second guess me.
“Let’s do it,” he says.
Together, we fall into a silent walk, while I struggle to get my breathing under control. Unfortunately, it feels as if it takes forever. I can’t believe I ran for so long.
“Is this your first time running with them?” he asks, breaking the silence.
“Yeah,” I wheeze. “It sounds dumb, but I’m kind of impressed with myself. I thought I’d tap out earlier than I did. I forgot to pay attention to anything except moving one foot in front of the other.”
“That’s how it’s supposed to be,” he says with a crooked smile. His green eyes remind me of emeralds right now, and it would be easy to fall into them.
Huh. That’s not right. He’s not in any of the packs my mother chose, which makes him firmly off limits. I have no idea what Cassidy and her pack were thinking. Clearly, my body and I are having a difference of opinion as far as decorum is concerned.
Fucking hussy.
“Your voice sounds kind of rough. Is your water cold?” he asks, concerned.
For some reason, my hackles don’t rise quite so high about it, and I nod.
“Mine is warmer. It may help your voice. Try drinking this,” he says, shoving his bottle of water at me.
It feels so intimate as I place my lips where he does and tip the bottle back so the water will spill out. It’s lukewarm, and it doesn’t bother my throat as much as the cold water does. I’ll have to remember this.
“Thank you,” I say, passing the bottle back to him.
“Anytime. Let’s keep your heart rate up and walk. Cassidy will kill me if I fuck up your progress,” he winks.
My lips twitch in amusement at the possible verbal ear lashing she may give him, but it would be her fault for leaving me with him.
“So Pack Tremaine is courting you?” Ellis asks curiously.
“They are,” I reply as I tip back my head to feel the sun on my face. I don’t even feel bad about it. I put sunscreen on before I went out, I shouldn’t burn.
“They’re a really good pack,” he says. “I just moved here recently, and joined their running group in an effort to meet more people. It’s easy to feel isolated with a new move.”
I force myself to move slowly so I don’t look crazy or wrench my neck from the shock I feel.
“You don’t seem like the kind of person who has a hard time meeting new people,” I say, brow raised.
“No?” he asks, the full weight of his gaze on me. It wants to steal the breath that I finally got back, and flushing in ways that are very inappropriate.
Shit. Backpedal!
“You just seem very confident,” I add.
“Well, that has nothing to do with meeting people if you’re inherently an introvert,” he says, shrugging. “I’d much rather spend time alone, and I can be an asshole.”
“Do assholes suggest ruining their run to walk with someone who’s slow?” I ask, rolling my eyes. “Bah, I doubt it.”
“You’re not slow,” he laughs. “You kept up with an experienced group of runners for over two miles. Give yourself a break, Nina. As for ruining my run, you didn’t. I’m coming off a knee injury and I have to baby it more than I’d like. You’re doing me a favor by walking with me.”
“Mmhmm,” I snort, surprising myself. Covering my face as he laughs harder, I shake my head. “Excuse me. Must have almost swallowed a bug.”
“Who's full of shit now, Little One?” he asks.
“We’re doing nicknames now? I don’t think you know me well enough for that,” I say primly. While I didn’t correct Abbott or Cassidy, it doesn’t feel right to let Ellis speak to me like that.
I’m not supposed to be having such an easy conversation with a stranger. I’m awkward, quiet, and have a boatload of secrets. They come out much too easily when I let my guard down.
“This is true. My apologies,” he says, inclining his head toward me. “I’m afraid I’m also a bit of a flirt. God, I don’t think I’ve flirted with anyone in ages outside of my boyfriend.”
“Boyfriend?” I ask, feeling as if I may be moving onto more solid ground. Though, he shouldn’t be flirting with me at all if he has a boyfriend.
“Yes, I think he’d like you too,” he says, winking at me.
Now I’m very confused.
“I can see by your face that I’m in danger of breaking you,” Ellis says .
“Only because if you’re with your boyfriend, then you shouldn’t be flirting with me,” I say, echoing my earlier thoughts.
Hell, I shouldn’t like that he’s flirting with me, and not only because I have packs of alphas I need to be focused on. God, it’s enough to make my head spin.