44. Sean
CHAPTER 44
SEAN
I yank my hair back and watch Ashley peel out of the driveaway. My heart is hammering inside my chest, making guilt and desire churn faster. All these years I was able to suppress my feelings for Ashley. But tonight, my self-restraint wasn’t enough. My shield broke, and I did the unthinkable. I kissed Ashley, and it was like we were never apart. All my emotions erupted to the surface with a vengeance.
Fuck. I drove Ashley away from her own home while it’s snowing heavily and it’s dark. I run down the sidewalk to where I parked my car. I have to make sure Ashley is okay, wherever she’s going.
There isn’t any traffic on the street, so I follow the fresh tire tracks on the road. Ashely had a head start, but she’s driving slowly, so I catch up with her after a minute. But once she leaves her neighborhood, her speed increases. Maybe she noticed I’m behind her.
“Shit. Slow down, Ash,” I mutter.
She misses the turn that would take her back to campus and keeps going. If she doesn’t change course, we’ll end up on the rural road that leads to the state park where she twisted her ankle three years ago. That was a pivotal point in our relationship. Reliving those memories makes my chest hurt. I force them back into a dark corner in my mind. Remembering those happy days is pointless, and it makes me feel even guiltier.
I keep up with her speed because I don’t want to lose her, but I maintain a safe distance from her car. All I can see now are tiny red dots ahead of me. Suddenly, they become brighter as she presses on the brakes sharply. Her car swerves off the road, followed by the godawful noise of glass shattering and metal bending.
“What the fuck!”
I have no idea what she hit first, but it’s the frontal collision with a tree that has me panicking. I park behind her and fly out of the driver’s seat faster than a bullet train.
“Ash!” I run to her side of the vehicle and see the deer that went through her windshield, its mangled body halfway inside. “No!
I try to open her door, but it’s locked. It’s so dark out, and with all the snow, I can barely make out her shape inside the car. “Ash, talk to me!” I shout.
Another vehicle approaches, but I pay it no heed. With shaking hands, I try to find my phone in my pockets and come up empty. God damnit. I must have left it in the car.
“Son, are you all right?” a man asks.
“I’m fine. It’s my sister. She’s hurt and she’s not moving. Call nine-one-one, please.”
“On it.”
I try the door again, but it won’t budge. I want to bang on the window, but I’m afraid to break it and hit Ashley with more shards of glass.
I’m unaware of how long it takes to hear the sirens in the distance. When the cops, firefighters, and paramedics finally arrive at the scene, they have to drag me away from Ashley’s car. Someone tosses a blanket around my shoulders, only it does little to help me. I’m too numb to feel the bite of the cold. I curl my hands into tight fists, digging my nails into my palms. All the noises around me are much too loud. I don’t know what I’ll do if Ashley doesn’t make it. Despite the ugly truth that keeps us apart, she’s my everything.