Chapter 33
CHAPTER 33
JAMISON
Melanie steps into my office. “I guess I missed the goodbye party.”
I stuff the last of my belongings into my bag. “I guess that means I did too.”
“It’s hard to believe this is the last time we’ll hang out here, discussing all our dreams.”
She runs her fingertip along the top of the desk. “Just think. A week ago, we were both wondering where our life would lead as we waited for the app to go live. And now, here we are, getting ready to embark on a new journey.”
“It appears to be the case.” I swallow the pain in my chest. “Are you excited about Miami?”
“Yeah, I am. Thanks for the tip. It never would’ve happened if it weren’t for you.” She pushes up on top of the desk and lounges like she used to. “Jamison, are you sure you’re doing the right thing?”
“Taking on another lucrative contract? Definitely.” I turn away so she can’t see the sadness in my eyes.
Walking away from Dori is the hardest thing I’ve done out of anything I’ve had control over. I thought it would get easier, but each day, I feel the loss ten times worse than the day before.
Mel growls. “You know that’s not what I mean. Have you talked to Dori since you told her you’re moving?”
“Nah. I’m giving her and Hunter the space they need to make it work. She made her choice, Mel, and I’ve come to peace with that. I’m surprised you don’t already know this. Have you not worked out your issues with her?”
Melanie doesn’t say anything, so I turn back her way. She’s studying me like she has something to say but won’t.
I shake my head. “What do you want to say that seems to be stuck in your throat?”
“Dori’s not doing well. Like at all. I’ve never seen her so…broken.” Mel pushes up and spins to hang her legs off the side of the desk. “She’s losing so much and because of that, she’s clinging to anything she has.”
“She’s not losing us. We’re just moving on. Besides, she has Hunter. The next board meeting is coming up and they’ll get her clause removed. Everything will be fine by the time I pack up my place and move next month. You still have three weeks here. There’s plenty of time for her to find her footing.”
Melanie rubs her lips together. She’s keeping something from me.
I segue to see if I can get Mel to open up. “This is how we’re going to end it? Melanie finally found some boundaries?”
“I’ll forgive you for being so rude if you admit that leaving isn’t what you want.”
My shoulders round. “I want to go, Melanie. That’s not a lie. Nothing but emotional pain lives here for me. I fucking hate it here.”
“Okay, I believe that’s true. But what if I told you Dori’s dealing with one of the most difficult situations I think a woman can go through? She needs you but won’t tell you that because she’s faking her happiness. She’s trying to be strong, but I know her. She’s crumbling.”
My mind goes back to her miscarriages. She pretended to be okay, but was depressed and barely hanging on.
My heart cracks in half. “Did she suffer another miscarriage?”
Mel sings the words. “No, but you’re getting warmer.”
“Fuck, Melanie. You promised her you wouldn’t tell me what’s going on with her, didn’t you?”
“I always knew you were brilliant. Now, keep on guessing.”
I puff out my annoyance in a hiss. “Can you give me a hint?”
“I already told you that you were close. Keep thinking along those lines. Think about what happened at the launch party.”
My mind goes back to the event. I skim through the day and can’t come up with anything other than Dori and me kissing.
Hunter saw us come out of the closet and left angry. Then I remember how I got Dori alone. Isabella took Hunter away.
“No fucking way. Tell me I’m wrong, Mel. Because if I’m not, Dori must be dying inside.”
Melanie lifts her eyebrows. “I can’t tell you. You have to say it.”
“Isabella’s pregnant?”
Mel hops off my desk and sticks her finger into my chest. “Bullseye.”
“And it’s Hunter’s? Come on, Mel. He’s smarter than that. He’s a billionaire. No way would he have unprotected sex with a one-night stand.”
She flicks my collar with the tip of her fingernail. “He would if he was half asleep and thought it was Dori.”
“Fucking hell. He was wasted when I saw them together.” I shuffle to the window in disbelief. “What a twisted chance of luck.”
“You saw them that night?” Mel shoves my shoulder. “Don’t tell Dori that for a while. She wouldn’t know what to do with that information. It very well could be the final straw in her delicate exterior.”
“She already knows and was mad at me for keeping it from her. She said Hunter came clean about that night and told her I saw them together.” I move back to my desk to give myself time to wrap my head around the news.
Mel taps on her lips as she thinks for a moment. “She was pretty upset with you during those two weeks, so she might have forgotten to mention that.”
“How is he sure it’s his? Isabella can’t be that far along.”
“Isabella insists it is. Of course, he’s asking for a paternity test, but he won’t make her have one until it’s safe enough for the baby.”
“Never mind Hunter’s problems. Tell me about Dori. How’s she handling this?”
“Drowning herself in work, not eating or sleeping, and working out to the point of obsession. Like I said, Jami. I’ve never seen her so broken.
“She’s barely speaking to me about it, claiming our time is to be all about me. Something about her being selfish. Blah, blah, blah. I think she’s afraid to open her mouth for fear she’ll break down if she acknowledges how she feels.”
I want to run to Dori and help her through this, but I don’t know what good it will do. She hasn’t contacted me, so who’s saying she wants my help?
“What should I do, Mel? I need some guidance because I have an uncanny ability to fuck up with her. Somehow, I always get it wrong and end up hurting her. I don’t want to do it again.”
“This time, you won’t. Go to her and show her you care. Show her you can hold space for her while she leans on you for support. I’m not saying anything will change between you two, but when she was falling apart over you, Hunter won her over by listening to her talk about you.”
My lungs deflate. “That sounds like I’m trying to manipulate her. I’m not going to do that.”
“That’s not what I’m saying. Go to her and be a good friend. You tell her you’ll always be there for her if she ever needs you. Well, that time is now.”
Mel takes me by the shoulders and spins me to the door. “She went home about an hour ago, saying she had a massive headache. Hunter’s been out of town all week, so she’s not with him.”
I take another second to think about it—Mel’s right. If Dori needs someone, I should go to her.
“Wish me luck.” I hug Mel. “Let’s keep in touch. Okay.”
She pushes out of my arms. “Yeah, yeah. I know you can’t live without me, so I’ll make sure I reach out once we’re both in Miami.”
“I’m going to hold you to that.”
“Go now or all bets are off.”
Newfound hope takes hold. I grab my belongings and rush out the door. I have no idea what I’m going to say to Dori, but I have a feeling I will the second I see her.
My heart jackhammers as I knock on Dori’s loft door, praying she’ll answer it. Metal scrapes against the other side of the wood, telling me she’s removing the security chain. The door swings inward. Dori comes into view wrapped in a robe and with her hair in a messy bun.
“Jami, I didn’t expect to see you before you left.” She opens the door wider. “ Come in.”
“Hey, Dori.” I step into her loft. She has the curtains drawn and only a light on her nightstand is turned on. “It’s a little dark in here for two o’clock in the afternoon. Is everything okay?”
She closes the door and gestures for my coat. “I had a headache and thought the darkness would help.”
I remove my jacket, and she hangs it on a coat rack near the entryway.
She drags her feet as she goes into the kitchen. “Can I get you something to drink?”
I hate seeing her in so much pain.
“No thanks, I’m good.”
“That’s probably for the best. All I have is water and iced tea.” She stands at the kitchen island and scans over her loft. “Sorry about the mess. I wasn’t expecting company.”
“I don’t care about how clean your place is. Besides, it’s not that messy.” I join her on the other side of the counter. “I hope you don’t mind me saying, but you seem a little down. Anything you want to talk about?”
Her eyes flit across my face before they lower. “Why are you here, Jami?”
“I cleaned out my office today and went to say goodbye. Hailey said you went home early, so I came here to see if we could chat.”
“You’re a terrible liar.”
My stomach tightens. “Why would you say that?”
“Hailey’s on vacation.”
“Oh. Busted.”
“Yeah, I’d say. Let’s go into the other room and you can start over.” She motions to her couch.
I walk over and sit beside her while considering how to make a good recovery. Honesty seems to be the best policy, but I feel bad throwing Melanie under the bus.
Dori saves me instead. “If you were at the office, I’ll assume you ran into Melanie. ”
“Yeah. She came in to say goodbye.”
“Goodbye? Don’t you two have plans to meet up once you’re in Miami?”
“Just because I’m working for Mateo again and she is starting there doesn’t mean I’ll see her. Actually, we probably won’t unless we schedule something.”
Dori curls up into the corner of the couch. “Why wouldn’t you see her?”
I shift sideways. “Since word got out about the app’s success, I’ve been getting tons of inquiries. I’m going to open an office there so I can work on multiple contracts at a time. I’m growing my team in-house so someday I can sit back and enjoy my life while I still bring in the cash.”
“Look at you making moves. If you’re not careful, you’ll wind up a billionaire before you’re thirty-five.” She flashes me a forced smile.
I smirk, knowing I’ve already hit said target. I glance away to hide appearing smug.
“Jamison Stone, look at me.”
“What?” I face her direction.
Her eyes widen. “Holy shit. You already are one, aren’t you?’’
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I can’t stop myself from smiling.
“Impressive, Jami. Impressive.” She shakes her head. “Why hide it?”
“Like you, Dori, I’ve never been about the money. Sure, it’s nice knowing I’ll be able to provide for a family, but the goal was always about leaving a legacy my parents would be proud of.”
“They were always proud of you.” Her expression drops. “You haven’t talked about them in a while. How are you doing with it all?”
I adjust myself, taking in a centering breath and resting my arm on the back of the sofa. “Since we had the accident in the mountains, the intense pain dissipated. It’s like reliving it helped me release it somehow.”
She’s quiet for a few beats, then peeks up at me. “Despite the circumstances, I’ll always treasure that day.”
“Yeah, me too.” I let the memory of my time with her fill my soul. “I have one regret about that day, though. One thing I wish I could change.”
“What’s that?” Her question comes out timid.
I scoot closer and stare deep into her eyes. “Instead of making that night about a lesson in control and trust, I would’ve made love to you instead.”
Her cheeks turn pink. “Oh, I didn’t know you separated the two.”
“Of course I do. One is about the build-up of energy, anticipating the next move, resulting in mind-blowing pleasure. The other is about connecting and sharing on a level that’s so deep that no one can describe it. It goes beyond pleasure. It’s where hearts intertwine, energy combines, and two souls become one.”
“That’s beautiful, Jami.” She turns her head and gets lost in a thought for a minute.
My gut clenches. Did I overstep a boundary? I give her space to think. Even if she’s hurting, she’s with Hunter. Talking about having sex with her probably made her uncomfortable.
“Hey, Dori. I didn’t mean to say something that would hurt you.”
Her focus comes back to me. “I’m not upset. I was just trying to remember if I’ve ever made love like you described. It’s sad, but I don’t think I have.”
“Not even with Hunter?” I want to slap myself as soon as I say it, but it’s out of my mouth before I can stop it.
“Not even with Hunter.” Her expression grows sad. “I’m not sure I’ve ever let my soul become one with anyone else. The closest I’ve ever come has been with you, but it wasn’t sexual.”
I nod, knowing exactly what she means. There’s just something about us that fits. It’s unexplainable, but it’s like our souls recognize the other.
A tear appears on her lashes. “We could’ve had that, couldn’t we?”
My heart fills with love. “Yeah, I think so.”
“I messed that up real good.” The tear falls, and she swipes it away. “You know, I’m sorry I shut you out. I’ve been selfish when it comes to you.”
“Why do you say that?”
She stands and walks over to her fireplace mantel. She picks up a picture of her family and stares at it.
“I’ve always seen you as a part of my family, Jami. Even when we didn’t talk for a while, I felt you. When I got pregnant with our baby…”
She takes a deep breath as if to calm herself. “When I lost our baby, I turned to Hunter and made you deal with it all on your own. I didn’t even ask you how it affected you. Then, when I found out about your son, instead of holding you and letting you cry on my shoulder, I made it all about me. I’m sorry about that.”
I get up and meet her by her side. I take the picture from her and place it back on the mantel. We stand before each other and I clasp her hands in mine.
“We all make mistakes, Dori.”
“Yeah, but some are more costly than others.” The weight of her statement hangs in the air.
The cost of her mistake is a relationship with me. And that realization is like a machete to my heart.
“Dori, it doesn’t have to be costly. We can still have it if you want.”