Chapter 32
Thirty-Two
JAMIE
True to her word, Violet has been doing an amazing job keeping me updated on her safety. I don't really care where she goes, just as long as I know she got there in one piece and is leaving the same way.
I can't shake the worry that festers in the back of my mind when I'm not with her. Which I'm thinking is why I feel a bit more at ease knowing she's been with Nate all afternoon.
As pissed as I am at the man, I know he will protect my woman with his life.
Which, in turn, is confusing and leaves me in an odd position with my feelings.
Same with Ellis. The reasoning for his tattoo damn near brought me to tears.
I blocked my schedule for him that day, knowing it would be a long one.
One that definitely required some reflection as I worked on it.
We had a good talk he and I. Hearing about how he's battled his anger issues all these years helped me understand him better. From what I've known, Ellis is kind of a dick who likes to pick fights. Now I'm coming to learn that he lacks control and understanding of his triggers.
Of course I’m happy to hear he's working on his shit, but I'm leery as fuck still. I wish I didn’t believe anything they say, except I do. I believe most of our time together was real, but that undercurrent of lies about how we even came to be is fucked.
Sighing, I start my car and am off to surprise my girl. Knowing she's with them right now makes me antsy. So much so I rescheduled my last client for the day so I could be there for their impromptu hangout.
My urgency was heightened by her cryptic message. We need to talk. She sounded pissed, so I packed my shit up and listened to my gut that was saying that I needed to be there.
The drive consists of deep breaths and logical thinking. If I get emotional, I won't be able to help the situation. I want to help. This thing between the four of us can’t blow up in pain and heartbreak permanently. I'll need to be her voice of reason and hope they let me in.
"Come in, come in." Nate swings the door open before I even knock. The grin on his face concerns me. "Just in time for Violet to kick your ass."
"Me?" I kick my shoes off and look around. The mess of tools and shit shocks me, but I'm stuck on Nate suggesting V's mad at me. "What the hell did I do?"
Nate chuckles and starts walking to the kitchen. I follow hot on his heels, ready to demand more answers. Thankfully, he explains.
"Ellis just showed her his new tattoo."
"Shit, yeah. Okay," I grumble and drag my hand through my hair. Of course I knew this would come up at some point, but why the hell did he have to show her so soon?
Rounding the corner, I see Violet with her hands on her hips, scowling at Ellis who still has his pant leg up. "Ellis, you can't—"
"Hey, my love," I coo, scooping her up and spinning her around. She struggles just a bit, but settles when I kiss the side of her neck.
When I set her down, her face is a bit more relaxed and less murderous. "What are you doing here?" she asks, blinking up at me in confusion. Then she shakes her head. "No. I don't care. What I do want to know is why you let him get that tattoo!"
Oh boy, she's about three seconds away from stomping her foot. Glancing at Ellis, I'm happy to see he looks amused and confident, rather than worried. That's good. One of us should feel okay about this.
I'm kinda scared.
"I can't tell people what to get and what not to get inked into their skin, Violet," I respond slowly. She knows this. "Ellis isn't an exception. Plus he thought it through and genuinely loves what he got. Right?"
"Right," Ellis agrees with a smile and crosses his arms. He looks like he's holding himself back from coming toward us, and part of me aches to wrap him in our hug.
"But it’s a whole ass fucking tree halfway up his calf, for me!"
Nate huffs a laugh behind me. I have half a mind to swing my leg out and kick him. I refrain. Barely. The bastard is enjoying this too much.
"What's wrong with that? Did he tell you the meaning behind it?" My eyes widen when I see Ellis shake his head.
"We didn't get that far." He pouts and winks at her.
"Sweets, listen now," I murmur, pulling her back to my front so she can pay attention to Ellis. This is important.
To my delight, she snuggles into my arms and gives me some of her weight.
Ellis lifts his foot onto the counter and shows off the stunning piece.
The roots curve around his heel and top of his foot which hurt like a bitch I'm sure.
From there, the tree's trunk looks like watercolors as it curves around his calf and sprouts branches every which way.
I was impressed when he requested that I add white and light purple flowers between the leaves. It's my favorite piece.
And his explanation makes it even more beautiful.
Ellis clears his throat and begins his journey back into Violet's heart.
"The placement is because you hurt your ankle.
But it's so much more than that. The roots symbolize your strength and ability to persevere no matter how much hurt you've endured.
You're a survivor and I find it admirable.
Hell, Bubbles, you climbed a cliff after spraining your fucking ankle and bruising your ribs. "
Violet's still in my arms as she listens.
"I chose a tree because they weather each and every storm, yet each year they continue to bloom and stand tall, just like you, V.
Your strength and ability to bloom after everything is the most beautiful thing I'll ever witness.
That's what the flowers are for. I had Jamie wrap it around my calf instead of going straight up because that will forever be how I feel you around my heart.
You have me in a vise grip even if you're living your best life away from me. "
"Ellis..."
"Hold on," he cuts Violet off with a small smile.
"This tree may have initially only been about you, but I realized it can have multiple meanings.
" Ellis swallows and glances over my shoulder at Nate.
"I've struggled with anger issues and controlling my emotions.
I'm working on it and finding peace in myself to understand my triggers and responses. "
I haven't heard this part of his tattoo’s meaning. I'm as entranced as Violet is right now. This is a part of Ellis I had yet to see; I'm intrigued and...proud?
"It's still about you but I'm selfish...
we all know this." He sounds pained when he jokes about it, making me flinch a little.
"I admire you, Violet Bennett. I want to be like you in the sense that I want to be strong enough to overcome the cliffs that threaten to yank me down every time I'm overwhelmed.
You've inspired me to not only earn your trust and the opportunity to love you right, but I also want to be better for me. "
Her breath hitches, and she straightens in my arms. I want to squeeze her and keep her attached to me for as long as I can, but there's a tether pulling her toward Ellis. Hell, I'm feeling it too. This is a pivotal moment for them.
"I'm learning and this tattoo reminds me of many important lessons. So yes, Bubbles, I got a tattoo for you. But not to woo myself back into your good graces, but because I needed it. To be marked by you, by my failures, and to be constantly encouraged to grow and learn."
Hesitantly, Violet steps out of my embrace. Wringing her hands together in front of her, she closes the space between herself and Ellis. With soft eyes, Ellis drops his foot and opens his arms invitingly.
Violet lifts her arms in response and wraps them around his neck. I watch with my heart in my throat as Ellis' bottom lip wobbles. A stuttering breath escapes his mouth and his eyes close as he dips his head into her neck.
She mumbles something into Ellis' shirt that has him lifting her onto her tiptoes as he squeezes her a little tighter.
A warm hand touches my lower back, jolting me ever so slightly. Nate rubs his thumb against me, soothing me and igniting me at the same time. When I glance at Nate, I find he's already looking at me. His throat bobs, and I can't help but glance between his eyes that hold so much emotion.
"I'm really, truly sorry, Jamie."
I can't breathe. I want to tell him I forgive him. Maybe even kiss him and dominate him. But Violet's not there yet. I won't take another step without her.
"Thank you, Nate," I murmur, accepting his apology for the first time. I believe he's sorry. I believe Ellis is working hard to settle the unpredictable inferno inside of him.
We're shifting and changing. Age doesn't change the ability to learn or strive for a better future. We're proof of that.
I may be thirty years old, but I swear I have epiphanies every other day that impact the flow of my thoughts. Hopefully, the four of us will continue to grow toward each other because I don't want to let this go.