Chapter 3 #2
I shut the door, trying to figure out why I told Kirk I was planning to marry the baby’s father when I’m not even talking to him. It’s like I was ashamed to admit I’m doing this alone. But I’m not ashamed. Things like this happen all the time. So why did I say that?
My phone rings. My pulse races, assuming it’s Jason. But when I look at the screen, I see it’s my mom.
‘Hi, Mom,’ I answer.
‘Hi, honey, are you working?’
‘Yes, but my next appointment just cancelled.’ I walk over to my desk and sit down.
‘I was calling about your graduation. Your father and I decided to fly out there early and make a little trip out of it. Deloris was telling me there are some darling little towns in that area.’
‘How early?’ I ask, wishing she’d asked me about this before booking her flight.
I need more time before I tell them my news.
I need to talk to Jason first, and then I need to figure out how to tell my parents.
They’ll be excited about having a grandchild, but upset that I’m not married.
They firmly believe you should be married before having a child.
They’re from a time when that’s what everyone did.
My parents are in their seventies. My mom had me when she was 45 and my dad was 53. My parents didn’t think they could have kids until I came along and surprised them. I guess surprise babies run in the family.
‘Mom, I don’t think you and Dad will like it out here. The towns are mostly farm towns. They aren’t touristy like out there.’
My parents live in a suburb just north of Boston. Now that they’re retired, they’re always looking for things to do.
‘We’ve already looked online and found some wonderful places we’d like to visit. We found a town to stay in at night and then during the day we’ll take little side trips. We’ll head to Madison on Friday. We didn’t want to get there early and be in your way. We know you’re busy.’
‘So when are you getting in?’
‘The 16th, and we’re staying in Haydon Falls. It’s supposed to be a beautiful little town. Have you heard of it?’
‘Haydon Falls? Um, yeah. I’ve heard of it.’
It’s where the father of my baby lives. The father of your grandchild.
Out of all the towns in Wisconsin, they just had to pick Haydon Falls?
‘If you’re able to, would you like to meet us there for a day or two?’
‘Where? Haydon Falls?’
‘Yes. Your father and I would love to spend some time with you since we won’t be seeing you this summer.’
‘I don’t know, Mom. I’ll have to check my work schedule.’
My summer job doesn’t start for a few weeks, but I don’t want to tell her that or she’ll guilt me into spending time with them in Haydon Falls, just like she tried to guilt me into coming home this summer.
I’m done with school, so I could’ve gone back to Boston, but I decided to stay here a few more months.
I’d like to say it had nothing to do with Jason, but that’s a lie.
I took a job here this summer because I wasn’t ready to leave.
Even before finding out I was pregnant, I wanted to call up Jason and ask if we could meet for dinner.
I wanted to see if the way we felt that night was real or just a side effect of the alcohol.
But I never got up the nerve to call him.
I kept coming up with reasons why I couldn’t.
I was too busy with work. Too busy with school.
I had to finish a paper first, or a project, or clean my apartment.
There was always something holding me back, but I can’t put it off anymore, not after finding out about the baby.
‘Mom, I need to go,’ I say, suddenly feeling sick.
‘Let me give you our flight times.’
‘Just text it to me. I really need to go. I’ll talk to you later.
’ I end the call and race to the bathroom.
I’ve gone a couple weeks without morning sickness, which makes me wonder if this is something else, like my nerves acting up because I’m afraid to tell my parents about the baby.
I hate disappointing them, and finding this out will definitely disappoint them.
Back in my office, I find my boss standing at my desk.
‘There you are,’ he says, smiling. He’s head of the student counseling center and also teaches some classes in my graduate program.
‘I just stepped out for a moment. Did you need something?’
‘I wanted to ask if you’d like to continue doing some counseling this summer.’
‘I’d love to, but I already have a job. I’m assisting Professor Abrams with some research.’
‘Yes, I heard, but he said it’s only part-time. I thought maybe you could fit in a few hours a week of counseling, unless you have other plans.’
I do have other plans. I want to use the time I’m not working to get ready for the baby and figure out my life as a single mom. The research job is easy and I can do it online, which is why I took it.
‘Could I think about it? I’d love to help out, but I don’t want to commit to it just yet.’
‘Of course. Think it over and let me know.’ He walks to the door, then turns back. ‘You’ve done a wonderful job here. The students rave about you. I’d be happy to give you a recommendation when you start applying for full-time positions.’
‘Thank you. I’ll take you up on that.’
He leaves and I’m reminded of the job I was going to apply for in Boston.
The job is for director of a teen crisis center that works with homeless teens.
I’d planned to work at a high school, but this job would give me more responsibly and better pay.
I was going to apply for it the day I found out I was pregnant.
I decided to wait, but if I wait much longer, the job will be taken by someone else.
There’s so much to think about. So much to decide.
I need to talk to Jason. I really wish he’d call me back.