Chapter 5 – Richard
“That drive from David was epic,” Otis says to me. “How the hell was he able to take the corners like that?”
“I have no idea,” I reply, but God, I want to find out.
I’ve never had an issue with David racing.
I always knew he had control of the car, but that changed when I watched him drive headfirst into the crash barrier.
I finally understood what Vincent meant when he said that it was hell on earth.
I wanted to call David. Hell, I wanted to catch the first plane I could get on and go to him.
But, what did I do? I carried on working with Otis, and waited for the call I knew was coming from Vincent.
It had taken twenty-four minutes, but when Lars and David had been clearly racing each other, and I’m guessing, ignoring some of the team orders, Vincent had called.
He had been pissed. Told me that something seemed to have shifted in David and Lars’s friendship.
I had been trying to avoid talking to David.
Giving us the distance we both needed, but I could no longer avoid it.
The call hadn’t gone as planned, I wanted to make sure that he was okay, but I let my emotions get the better of me, and I acted like a dick.
When he told me he was leaving, I had been furious.
Now, I had to figure out how to talk to him.
I know he hasn’t mentioned anything to Vincent, otherwise, I would have received another call.
I catch the moment David sees me in the corner of the garage, his eyes widen just a fraction in surprise, but the rest of his face stays stoic. I used to spot the fire in his eyes when he looked at me, but I killed that fire.
“Let’s go over there,” I say to Otis, and the pair of us walk over to Vincent, Lars, and David.
“David, that quali was…” But Otis isn’t able to finish his sentence as he enthuses next to David.
“Yeah, that was a good drive,” I add.
“Thanks Richard,” David states, but he turns away from me and looks at Otis.
“Well, I managed to catch some of your qualifying drive, too. You were great,” David says. “And a little birdie tells me you’re finishing the season with me.”
“I am,” Otis says.
“It will be a good experience. Get you ready for next year,” David adds, giving me a slight side glance.
“Why? What’s happening next year?” Otis asks.
“Well, I would say you’re going to be offered my seat,” David explains. “Especially as I’m leaving.”
“Leaving?” I question, and look over to Vincent, who seems to be as surprised as I am. Looks like David has done this on purpose.
“Otis, nothing has been confirmed yet,” Vincent replies. “And David, this is a conversation that we should be having in private.”
“Of course, Vincent. Sorry. I’ll make an appointment. Now, if you would excuse me, I want to get some food and rest before tomorrow’s race.”
None of us say anything as we watch David turn and leave the garage, and for a second I thought I saw him stumble, but he is walking normally so it had to be my imagination.
His little outburst has come as a shock to all of us, by the looks of things, and we all just stand there looking at each other.
“Lars, has David mentioned anything to you about leaving?” Vincent eventually asks.
“Nope,” Lars confirms.
“I’m going to have to talk to him sooner, rather than later, now,” Vincent adds, and I hear the edge in his voice.
“Vincent, don’t act too hastily,” I start. “He was only talking to us.”
When I look over to Otis, I can see that he’s not sure what to make of the situation, which is not going to help him, or his mental state, for his race tomorrow, and I’m suddenly pissed at David. That was a shitty thing to do.
“Otis, don’t worry about next year,” I say to him. “Just concentrate on your races, you’re doing a great job, and leave all the contract stuff to us.”
“Yeah,” Lars adds. “David was right, you’re doing great in the car. Plus, that’s why Vincent is there, to deal with all the hard stuff. We get to do all the fun stuff.”
Otis laughs at Lars’s joke, and I can see Vincent relax.
Lars is a phenomenal driver, and I’m starting to see how much of an asset he’ll be once he stops racing.
He has this way about him that I don’t think I’ve ever seen before.
Maybe I’m only noticing it now because he’s no longer tense about the fact he and Vincent were hiding. Could the same apply to David?
“So, does anyone want to bring me up to date on how David was able to drive like that? Were there some alterations made to the car?” I ask Vincent.
“Actually, both cars were set the same,” Vincent advises. “From what I gather, it was Lars that made the difference.” I look over to Lars.
“Look, this isn’t my place, but I think David has some shit going on in his personal life. I just told him to ignore it. That, when he’s on the racetrack, none of it matters. Annoyingly, it helped.”
“What personal shit?” Vincent demands.
“That’s something you’re going to have to ask him. I promised not to say anything,” Lars adds, “Sorry.”
Oh shit. That has to mean that whatever is going on with me and David has now affected his driving, and it brings back memories of Lars’s accident.
Watching the horror that had washed over Vincent’s face.
Learning the truth about Lars and Vincent’s relationship, and the text that was sent by Vincent which caused Lars to get distracted and crash.
Does that mean David’s crash was my fault?
Had I somehow distracted him to the point he lost concentration?
But I have deliberately not contacted him.
“Hey Otis, want to check out some of the data on today’s race with me?” Lars asks, and I don’t think Otis has time to respond before Lars is leading him away, and I can hear them talking about race positions.
“Want to get a drink?” Vincent asks, when everyone has gone. “I could do with one.”
Back at the hotel, we go straight into the bar and find a table in the corner. It may be a little too public to talk shop, but there’s not too many tables close by, and the people at those tables don’t look like press. We keep our tones hushed all the same.
“If David leaves, is Otis ready to step up?” Vincent asks.
“Honestly, he’s good. But I don’t think he’s David good. Not yet, anyway. With time he could be. But we need to wait and see.”
“I know David agreed to stay a year, but I automatically thought we could get him to stay. After that outburst today, I’m not so sure.”
“Vin, I’m as confused as you.” I’m not, but within this conversation, these are the right words to say. “His drive today, I thought, would've ignited his passion to stay.”
“What about this personal shit Lars was talking about? Do you know anything about that?”
Yes, I do. It’s me. I’m the personal shit, is what I should say, but the words that come out of my mouth are, “No idea. David is someone who keeps stuff like that private. Not even the press has been able to dig anything up.”
“So, why now? Could it be his family, or maybe a romantic affair?”
“Vin, this is something that you’re going to have to discuss with David. Neither of us can speculate on anything.”
“Yeah. I just don’t want David to end up in the same situation as Lars and get into an accident.”
“I think Lars is helping. Let’s just keep encouraging that,” I say.
“Yeah, but I’m going to need you to start looking around. If David leaves, then we’re going to need to get a new third driver.
“I will. Do you want me to look at some of the drivers in our team, or further afield?”
“Let’s do both. It might be good to get some fresh talent into the team. But they need to be good, and they need to be okay with coming into a team that has openly gay members.”
“I don’t think your sexuality will affect the chance of getting new drivers, but I’ll make sure they’re happy.”
“Good. Now, let’s change the subject. I need a distraction from racing for a few minutes.”
From the glint in Vincent’s eyes, I know where this conversation is going to head, and it’s a conversation I really don’t want to get involved in.
“So, how is the love life?” Vincent asks, and he loves it when I groan at him, he was expecting this from me.
“I’ve been working,” I start. “Decided to take a leaf out of your book. There’s been no time for dating.”
“Anyone scratched an itch?”
“Seriously, are you asking me about my sex life?” I ask, grinning at him, “I never ask you about yours.”
“Fine.” Vincent concedes, but I can see he’s not happy that I’m not giving any details. “You know, I wish we would have told each other earlier. We spent years hiding the best part of ourselves.”
“I don’t think either of us were ready, but, in all honesty, it wasn’t needed. It wouldn’t have altered our friendship.”
“No, it wouldn’t, but it would’ve been a hell of a lot nicer going to clubs with you, and made hiding easier, too.”
“Actually, I haven’t been to a club in a very long time.” And, I know, that comment is going to trigger more questions, but I couldn’t help myself. Going to clubs wasn’t getting me the men I needed. Men that could satisfy my desires.
“Then how the hell did you meet people?”
“I didn’t. Well, not really.”
“Care to explain what you did, if you didn’t go to clubs? Didn’t you say there had been someone special?”
Shit, I hadn’t planned to explain how I got my sexual fix. I wasn’t like Vincent. I couldn’t just meet someone in a club, they were never going to satisfy my needs, but it’s going to sound so sordid, when it was anything but, and I get the feeling that Vincent isn’t going to understand.
“So, it has been a while, but I used to use a service. A very discreet, high-end service. When I needed someone, they were supplied to me.”
“You paid for sex?” The astonishment is clear in his voice.
“You make it sound worse than it was.”
“So, this person, who was special to you, was what, a prostitute? Is that why you broke up? He didn’t want to give it up, but you wanted him to?”