Chapter 18 #2
You are my Sunshine.
My only sunshine.
You make me happy when skies are gray.
You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you.
Please don’t take my Sunshine away.
I clung to my cell, unsure when the call had ended. Unsure how long I’d been standing in the same place, melody circling. Unsure when the weight on my chest had subsided. Unsure how Josiah managed to do what he did so effortlessly.
A text vibrated my cell. Hurriedly, I removed it from the side of my face, hoping to see Josiah’s heart on the screen. I didn’t. Instead, it was a group text.
Paradise? Roulette wondered.
I could use the vacation. Rather responded.
I’m free for the next three weeks. I don’t mind. Rome added.
My bags are always packed. Roaman admitted.
Come on. Rugger encouraged.
Sounds delightful. Royce replied.
I’ll clear my schedule. My text was threading across my fingertips before the thought had fully formed in my head.
I’ll have him gas the plane. Egypt insisted. I can hardly wait. She followed up with.
Two weeks? Roulette questioned.
There were no complaints amongst us. Everyone promised to free their schedules and be prepared for departure in two days.
Ding.
Dong.
“Uh!”
My cell fell onto the floor in front of me. I placed a hand against my chest and steadied my breathing.
You’re going soft on me, my girl.
A chuckle tumbled out of me as I realized my hand wasn’t on the thigh holster, removing my weapon and preparing to fire if needed. To my surprise, I wasn’t wearing it.
Focus, baby. I nodded at the sound of Chem’s voice and made a mental note to retrieve my holster and the gun that belonged inside it. For now, I tapped the large screen above the console table beside me.
Relief cleansed my palette. Janeese stood on the other side of the door, waiting for it to be opened. Two bags dangled in her arms, prompting my appearance. I tiptoed toward the door.
My bare feet made contact with the wood, nonstop, until I reached out and turned the gold handle. Janeese’s smile was radiant. She reminded me so much of Josiah. His energy was attached to her presence.
Just softer.
And prettier.
And more colorful.
And ultra feminine.
She was wearing a powder blue dress that swayed with each move she made. Chanel sandals adorn her feet. Her toes were French-tipped.
“Hi,” she greeted me.
I stepped forward, taking a bag from her.
“Hi.”
“Josiah sends his love,” she revealed, handing me the second bag.
I gazed at the contents inside. The books and gummies he’d promised were stocked.
So were things he hadn’t mentioned, like a heartbeat monitor that came with earphones or the framed sonography photo that I hadn’t given him.
Each bag was loaded with sentimental gifts and things Josiah thought I’d need to make this journey a bit less difficult.
Janeese turned to leave. Though out of character for me, I felt the need to invite her inside. My heart wouldn’t allow her to leave.
“Would you like to come inside?” I asked.
“Ummm–” Janeese inhaled. “Sure. She exhaled.
She followed me beyond the foyer, down the hall, and into the spacious living room. Soft cushions surrounded us. I took one and encouraged Janeese to do the same.
“Have something to drink?” I asked.
“I’m fine for now.”
I paused, waiting for Janeese to tell me what was truly on her mind. I’d seen nothing but gloom in those pretty eyes of hers.
“Thanks.”
“For?”
“Being in Josiah’s corner. Both personally and professionally. Despite his circumstances, he’s a great man. He’s an even better uncle.”
“Well,” I sighed, “He fired me.”
I couldn’t help but chuckle as the words surfaced. It sounded silly, but it was my reality. I’d never been excused from a case. Not until Josiah Blackwood.
“Seriously? Why?”
“To pursue our relationship,” I said, giving her a very vague response.
I didn’t know the true dynamic of their family and didn’t want to assume Josiah had told her anything he hadn’t. My firing was news to her. It led me to believe he hadn’t revealed much.
“Just like Josiah. Let me guess… He didn’t want you coming to the facility anymore.”
I nodded. “Yes.”
“He barred us all. But I understand.”
“So do I, no matter how much it sucks.”
Silence.
I adjusted my body, taking the opportunity to catch my breath.
“Will you have a service?”
Janeese quickly shook her head.
“Is there a reason?”
Her nostrils flared, although she was smiling. She was a seated contradiction.
“Because there’s something my brother isn’t telling me.
And, until I find out what’s real and what’s make-believe, I will not celebrate a man Josiah has disgraced.
Yes, I loved Anthony. But Josiah loves me.
And, Aubrey. And our parents. So much that he’d self-sabotage, which is what is happening right now. I can feel it deep in my soul.
“You know? While he’s in there suffering, I don’t get to stand over an empty casket and cry tears for a man that I could possibly regret later.
And, maybe Josiah never tells me what happened or why.
I’ll have to live with that choice. But I’ll always understand that it had to be made.
He’s a good man. A great man. And, would never cause Aubrey and me this level of pain. Not unless he had to.”
“You’re admitting his guilt?” I wanted to know.
“My heart tells me so.” Her voice cracked.
She knew Josiah well. Though partially surprised, it wasn’t foreign to me.
I knew Chemistry by heart, too. He could do no wrong in my world.
Not because he was incapable, but because he wouldn’t.
He couldn’t. His heart wouldn’t allow him to.
Just as Janeese was standing by Josiah’s side, I would be there with Chem every step of the way.
He was my Teddy.
My soft spot.
My comfort zone.
My bear.
My place of peace.
“Well, I’m getting ahead of myself here, but I could use some fresh air. With all of this happening, I haven’t had a moment to myself. My parents decided to get Aubrey for the night. I hate to admit it, but she’s been my emotional support.
“Though I should be home learning to function without her during this time, I’m almost about to get on my hands and knees asking if you want to get out of the house tonight. Maybe go for a drink. I could use a drink. You want a drink?”
I shook my head. “I can’t drink right now.”
Naturally, my palm planted itself on my small, growing belly.
To someone who hadn’t been around long, one would believe it to be my unaltered framework.
However, that couldn’t be further from the truth.
I was bulging, and it wasn’t because my period was near.
It wasn’t bloat. It was babies. Two precious human growing inside of me.
Janeese’s eyes grew three times their size as her mouth widened.
“Wait! Seriously?”
I shrunk slightly, hoping I hadn’t ruined plans Josiah might’ve been preparing.
“You didn’t look in the bags?”
“No. I never look in the bags.”
My brows raised.
“Is he sending things to other women?”
She gasped as if I’d asked the impossible.
“Nooo! Of course not. Josiah is a community leader. He gifts groceries, furniture, homes, used cars, jobs, clothing, necessities, and so much more to those who have fallen victim to prescription drugs. Those who didn’t intentionally become addicts, but rather got hooked on the feeling prescribed meds provided during the most critical times of their lives.
“Though he is on the other side of things, he understands how impactful they are. Good and bad. He chooses to focus on both angles instead of his own. He’s as invested in the rehabilitation of those families affected as he is in the formulation of the drugs.
“He doesn’t want his work to discontinue because of his situation. So, I’ve made a delivery or two since he’s been in prison. And, as I said, I never look in the bags. It isn’t my place to judge. Josiah doesn’t. He only wants to help.”
As if he couldn’t be more unrealistic, here was Janeese, showing up at our doorstep with a basket full of green flags to go along with the ones I was already trying to organize in my head.
“He’s truly unreal.”
“So is this news! When– What— tell me more!”
“I think I’ll let Josiah do the honors. I feel awful sharing his good news before he could.”
“It’s why he sent me,” Janeese confirmed. “It was because he wanted me to see it for myself.”
“He knew you wouldn’t look in the bags.”
“He was certain I wouldn’t.”
“In that case, I’m going to need an extra set of hands some days, because we’re having twins.”
“Be for real, Miss Attorney!”
I chuckled, placing my hand over my mouth. “Seriously!”
“Twins?” Janeese was no longer sitting down. She was up on her feet.
“Yes. Two babies, one tummy.”
“Aubrey is going to lose her mind,” Janeese squealed. “We’re having babies. Josiah’s babies!”
Her joy was contagious. The gloom that lingered in those brown eyes dissipated. There was light. There was Sunshine.
Holding the side of my skirt, I climbed the stairs that led to the main cabin. Loud, thunderous sounds appeared suddenly. I turned, hand over my head to assist my black Prada shades in their efforts to shield my eyes from the sun.
Of course.
“I got an ass so big like the sun. Hope you got a mile for a dick, I wanna run.”
Roulette’s car stereo was obnoxiously loud, blasting from the missing roof of her latest toy—a matte red Ferrari. Silently, I watched in total obsession as she parked her vehicle, shut off the engine, and tossed her keys to the awaiting attendant.
No luggage.
No baggage.
No extra weight.
She embodied liberation. Freedom. Free choice.
Free will. Total and undying commitment to self.
She was the type of woman the world would bend for every time she showed her face.
She was the type of woman who represented us all.
She was the type of woman who we were raised to be.
She was the type of woman others would kill to be.
I know that’s right, Sister-girl.
I saw so much of myself and Royce in Roulette. We were all the same, just set at different levels. While I was the first notch, Royce was the second. Roulette was the final notch. Her position was never to be mistaken. She wouldn’t allow it.
She was flawless in a lace dress that hung to her feet. She lifted it as she climbed the stairs to meet me. Her hands graced my exposed belly. Her lips pressed into my skin, leaving remnants of her lip gloss.
“Hi, babies. I’m Rou, your best ever friend.
Though I don’t like kids, I promise to love both of you.
I can’t wait to meet you two so I can spoil you rotten and hand you off to your parents after making you both problems. In case you haven’t felt it, yet, you’re already loved.
And honored. And cherished. And considered.
And wealthy. And irreplaceable. And spoiled.
And boundless. And capable. And strong. And soft.
And happy. And prideful. And genius. Muah! ”
Once more, she kissed my stomach before lifting her eyes to meet mine. Her arms went around me before words escaped her. I could feel her heartbeat against my chest.
“My baby is having babies.”
My eyes welled with tears at the sound of her revelation.
“And she doesn’t look a total mess.”
I rolled my eyes, taking Roulette and her dramatics by the hand. Together we entered the cabin, joining the women we loved so dearly.
Roulette grabbed the glass that Royce was handing her. Izzy rested beside her mother, sound asleep in her car seat.
“Look at the pretty baby,” I gasped, ready to wake the sleeping beauty.
“For you.”
I grabbed the glass of juice from Rome, sure it was alcohol-free. Glasses raised in the air. Silence engulfed us. All eyes were on me.
I felt loved.
I felt heard.
I felt seen.
I felt invincible.
“To paradise,” I cheered, lifting my glass.
“To paradise,” everyone belted.