Chapter 27
Charlie
I woke up some time later, trying to orient myself with a kitten still lying on top of me. I reached for my phone and saw that it was only three in the morning.
Then I remembered what I’d heard just as I fell asleep. I smiled almost automatically, but then the doubt set in almost immediately. I realized in an instant that there was a difference between being in love and suddenly knowing that love was mutual. I wasn’t sure if Teague had meant for me to hear his words, but I’d heard them nonetheless, and now I felt uneasy.
Salem chirped at me and moved to sprawl next to my pillow. I guess both of us got a bit too hot sleeping attached to each other like we’d been.
I was about to put my phone back on the bedside table, when it lit up with urgency. Law was calling me.
My heart immediately in my throat, I swiped as quickly as I could
“Law?”
“Uh, hey Charlie. Sorry to wake you up—”
“You’re not waking me up, I was awake.” Clearly that’s why I answered so quickly. He hadn’t thought of that, so I knew something was really wrong.
“Yeah, okay. So, here’s the thing.” He took a deep breath. “Around dinnertime, Dad had a minor heart attack.” Before I could freak out, he continued, “He’s going to be fine, he just came out of surgery. They put in a stent, and he’s being medicated. The doctor said there’s no reason why he can’t make a full recovery.”
My brain buzzed loud enough that I heard it in my ears. I realized it might’ve been my blood pressure or something.
“O-Okay,” I managed. “Do you want me to—”
“No. Absolutely not, Charlie. There’s no reason for you to travel all the way back for this. I’m handling it. You need to stay there where you’re happy, okay?” I guess I didn’t get my words together fast enough because he quickly added, “Charlie? Promise me you’ll stay there.”
My voice was weak when I replied, “Okay.”
“I love you and I need you to be safe in every way possible. If anything changes here, which it shouldn’t, I’ll let you know.”
Salem, unhappy about me disturbing his sleep with my talking, meowed insistently.
“Tell my nephew good night,” Law murmured, sounding like he was smiling tiredly.
“I will. Love you too, Blue.”
“Good night, Charlie.”
“Night.”
I put the phone on the bedside table and curled under the covers. Salem repositioned himself right under my chin, then let out a little meep as he settled. He started to purr, loudly, and the vibrations against my skin in addition to the sound kept me from spiraling for the time being.
I wanted to call Teague, but I’d told him not to come over. I didn’t want to disturb his sleep, and the last thing I wanted to come across as was fickle. That was one of my mother’s favorite insults.
Shit. I was thinking about my parents again. I didn’t want to go back, but what if Dad got worse? It was his heart, after all. What if something went wrong? If complications arose?
Tiny needles pierced my clavicle. “Oww. Thank you, I guess,” I grunted at Salem.
I stroked his head and back with my fingers, careful not to disturb him, and concentrated on the rhythm of his purring. Somehow, I fell asleep, because the next time I woke up it was light outside, and I was late for work.
When Salem and I left the cabin, Cricket was waiting for us outside. I let Salem down, and he trotted his hardest next to Cricket who walked sedately, keeping an eye on him. He’d had his breakfast, but I still needed to get mine from the dining room, so I’d put him in the crate so any guests wouldn’t be upset about a kitten climbing all over me, just in case.
There were no messages from Teague, but since I was late, I knew he’d already been by with a cupcake, and I wondered how much he’d be reading into the fact that I was late and hadn’t messaged him yet.
I just… couldn’t. Not when my brain was still trying to come to grips with what was happening in Arizona.
“Okay, stop,” I told Cricket and Salem when we got to the point where we could see the parking lot below. “Salem, time to come to Daddy.”
I knelt and waited until Cricket nudged him into my direction. She was such a great babysitter. After placing him in the sling, I walked down the dirt road that had become so familiar to me in my time here. I loved it here. I was in love with an amazing man. Why was I feeling so… not good all of a sudden?
After depositing the kitten and some treats into his crate, I went to the dining room. Dana was hustling, because we had most of the rooms full and there were people coming and going for breakfast.
Nic was sitting at one of the tables with coffee and a pastry, and she took one look at me then blurted out, “What’s wrong?”
I grimaced and went to get my food. I didn’t feel like eating. Nothing looked good. I was pretty sure I couldn’t even choke down the cupcake that was sitting on the corner of the front desk as usual.
Of course, knowing me, when she saw how little food I’d put on my plate, she got even more worried.
“What’s going on, Charlie? Who do I need to hurt?”
I got that her brain went directly to Teague, because of course it did. I smiled tightly.
“Nobody.” I sat down and took a sip of my coffee. “Family stuff.”
She narrowed her eyes, her gaze flicking to my plate and back to my face. “Okay. You know you can talk to me about it, right?”
I loved her for not asking about details. She knew better.
“Yeah, of course.”
“Good.” Before she had time to say anything else, one of the guests that had just finished their breakfast came to our table to ask her about something.
I concentrated on choking down some food. I knew I wouldn’t be able to eat much and that it’d make me feel worse the longer it lasted. Because it always would.
My mother’s voice scoffed in my head. “Way to make everything about yourself, Charlie. That’s why you can’t keep a good man. Who would want someone as damaged as you are? There’s nothing you’ve done right in your life so far, so why be surprised if you managed to fail here, too?”
I stood up abruptly, making the guest and Nic jerk back in surprise.
“Sorry, sorry,” I murmured, then fled the dining room. Nic would clear the table after me.
Spiraling like this had been the norm, once. It hit me so damn hard now, because idiotically, I’d thought I didn’t need to worry about that as much anymore.
I went into the office, then signed out a couple of guests and went on autopilot for a couple of hours.
When Oak came into the office to pick up the trash, he looked at me, opened his mouth, then closed it again. I guessed he knew better than most what someone who didn’t want to be bothered while going through something looked like. I’d learned that he was a private person, someone who felt incredibly deeply, but tried to keep most of his inner turmoil from others. He had emotional intelligence I’d rarely encountered in others. It didn’t surprise me though, because his uncle was almost as good at deciphering others’ emotions.
As he was leaving the office, Oak glanced at the untouched cupcake box on the desk, frowned, and left the room.
I ignored lunchtime, not feeling hungry, then finished my planned tasks for the day in record time. When I saw Nic pass through the lobby, I called out to her.
“Yeah?” she peered through the hole in the wall above the front desk.
“Can you guys keep an eye on the desk if I take the rest of the day off?”
“Of course, just put the thing up.”
“Okay, thanks.”
Looking worried, she left to continue whatever she’d been doing. I grabbed the framed note that said to ask help from the kitchen if the front desk wasn’t occupied and plopped it on the same desk.
Then I fished out Salem from his crate and put him into the sling I’d been wearing most of the day. He’d been asleep in the crate for over an hour, and I knew he’d love what I’d decided to do with my day.
Steve was guarding the Inn from his spot by the front doors, his bunny next to him.
“Come on boy, let’s go for a walk,” I told him. “Where’s your sister?”
As if summoned, Cricket’s massive head popped up from the brushes up the hill.
We made a funny little parade, me, the kitten who wanted to be on the ground as soon as he spotted Cricket, and the two massive dogs.
I tried to keep my brain as empty as possible as we trudged up to the cabins so that I could change into my hiking boots. I grabbed a bottle of water, and an energy bar I didn’t hate, and went back out just to see Cricket rolling on the ground with Salem bouncing on her fluffy tail.
Steve wasn’t impressed, but he wagged his tail at me.
“Good boy. Are you keeping an eye on the brats?” I found myself kneeling in the dirt and hugging Steve close. He sighed and placed his head on my shoulder, then just stood there, letting me decompress the suffocating feeling that was bubbling up from within me.
When I was ready, I wiped my cheeks and kissed Steve’s nose. He gave me a look that told me that was not necessary behavior, then turned around to look at Cricket and Salem who were now stalking something in the long grass near the pond.
“Come on kids, let’s go!” I called to them, and Cricket immediately turned to me.
Salem didn’t, but then he realized she’d just leave him there, screamed, and ran after her.
“You’re a good cousin, aren’t you, girl,” I told her and patted her head. At least this way the kitten would know that he needed to stick with the rest of us.
I knew there were old hiking routes deeper into the woods, and I’d wanted to check them out before. I’d even talked about it with Teague— don’t think about Teague right now —so I walked up the little embankment that had been carved into the hillside to even out the space behind the old shower building.
I’d picked Salem up so he wouldn’t have to scramble up to the path I knew to be there, and now placed him back down. He was so bright eyed and bushy tailed that he made me smile. It was exactly what I’d needed today.
The path was overgrown, but it was clear it was one of Cricket’s patrolling routes. There were pawprints in dried mud here and there, and the foliage on the edges left just the right width for her furry self to walk unobstructed.
I didn’t worry about finding my way back. Even when we turned to random directions and when Salem decided he needed a nap and I had to put him into the sling, I still wanted to walk more. Cricket and Steve wouldn’t let me get lost, after all.
We found some boulders, and I sat down on one, then ate my energy bar and drank half of my water. Salem woke up for long enough to climb all over the exciting big rocks, bouncing around while Cricket worried below.
I caught him and put him back into the sling when I was ready to continue, and he just fell back asleep. Again, I found myself smiling.
I realized I had forgotten my phone in the cabin and wondered if it was on purpose or not. I wasn’t sure if my brain had just decided to leave it behind without my input, or if some part of me truly didn’t want it with me. Either way, it wasn’t in my pocket, and I felt a tiny surge of panic.
The what ifs tried to bubble to the surface, and I took in a deep breath. Steve slid his massive head under my hand as if to tell me to chill, so I did.
“Thank you, boy.”
We continued on.
It was hard to tell what time it was under the shade from the trees. When the light began to lessen, I knew we might be in trouble.
“Okay, Cricket. Let’s go home,” I told her, and she turned around and started to lead us back to where we’d come.
She picked different paths I would’ve, but I trusted her process. What else could I do anyway, I was hopelessly lost either way.
I didn’t panic. Instead, I kept walking on the path that practically vanished here and there, keeping my eyes in front of me just in case there were roots or rocks obstructing my way. I didn’t want to twist my ankle or worse.
Salem woke up and peered out from the sling. He seemed to think the dim light was a bit too scary, and I was happy that he chose to stay up with me.
Suddenly, Cricket stopped. Steve, who had been trailing behind me and Salem came to stand against the backs of my legs.
He growled, and I could see Cricket puff up. She let out three quick barks that were unlike any sound I’d heard from her before. Salem ducked out of view.
I stopped breathing. I couldn’t hear anything; the woods were silent around us. Then, somewhere in the distance, a branch snapped. Soon after, the dogs calmed, and Steve nudged me to move again.
I stumbled, but righted myself and made sure I kept up with Cricket’s brisk, steady pace. I knew I was safe. Nothing in these woods could hurt me when I had the two dogs with me, but my heart still tried to beat out through my chest.
It was only minutes later when I suddenly saw a wall. We were at the yellow house.
“Clever girl, Cricket!” I told her, and she happily wagged her tail at me.
I gave her and Steve all the pets, then told them to go home. They begrudgingly left, and I took Salem to the cabin. The time on the old wall clock said it was nearly six in the evening. No wonder I felt exhausted.
And hungry, but I didn’t feel like eating anything.
I put Salem down on the bed and got undressed, then went and showered, not even bothering to turn on the lights. I hadn’t left them off in so long, that sliding back into an old routine felt weird, yet it was second nature still.
After putting on some pajamas, I ate some cereal and grabbed my phone. There were messages from Nic, Teague, Oak, and Law.
I sighed, didn’t read any of them, and put the phone back down.
I fed Salem, then went to bed. The phone lit up with a message from Nic telling me that she knew I was okay because their dogs had come home. I was pretty sure the part of the message that didn’t pop up in the preview would tell me off for worrying her, so I felt no need to read it.
Somehow, the hiking had taken my mind off everything, but I still dreamed of running along hospital corridors, searching for someone, while something was chasing me. Not even the kitten curled up against my neck could keep the monsters at bay.