CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Jack
I somehow made it through the rest of the day, my rage and hurt keeping me going .
Her words played over in my mind. I should have known she wouldn’t forgive me for the accident, that I was getting in over my head and too attached. I was dreaming of a life with her when I never really knew for sure how she felt about me, about us. How could I expect her to shack up with me after everything?
The ache in my chest didn’t dull, even as I pressed my fist into the flesh, willing it to lessen. “My first heartbreak at the age of thirty,” I snorted without humor.
I didn’t see her again for the rest of the day, which was just as well. I didn’t think I could look at her without begging her to love me.
It was ridiculous how gone I was for that woman. The moment she stood up for me at Larry’s Leathers, apologizing for how others treat me, then kissing my knuckles, I fell in love. Hell, I didn’t fall, I plummeted. And landed with a sharp, jolting agony that I couldn’t shy away from. What a fool I’d turned out to be.
I finished up for the day and headed back to the cabin for a long, miserable night alone. I paused when I saw all the Cartwright sisters gathered on the porch, glancing between themselves with worried expressions.
I detoured. “Everything okay, ladies?” I asked, stopping at the steps to the porch.
“We’re worried about Kat. We haven’t seen her since last night,” Maddy said.
My stomach clenched at the mention of her name. I scrubbed the back of my neck. “She was in the south pasture a few hours ago.”
“You haven’t seen her since?”
I shook my head.
Daisy narrowed her eyes. “I thought you were working with her?”
I met her hard stare. “I was. But now I’m not. What’s going on?”
“We may have…ambushed her last night,” August said.
“Right…What about?”
“I found out about the debt on the ranch and that she’d been keeping it from us,” Daisy replied, accusation in her tone.
The last thing I wanted was to start another fight, especially with Daisy who, frankly, scared me as much as Kat did. But I didn’t like the way this sounded. “Do you own the ranch?” I asked her, raising an eyebrow.
“No, do you?” she snapped back.
“No, none of us do!” I yelled, not afraid to support my woman, even against her own sisters. “Kat owns the ranch which means it’s Kat’s business.”
“But we all live here, she should have said something,” Tilly piped up, peeking out from behind August.
“Which is why she wanted to protect you from worrying about it. The last thing you need to be concerned about is losing your home. She’s been working hard to get things in order and make sure none of you are impacted after everything that’s happened lately. She was looking out for all of you,” I growled, staring at each one in turn. “How did you find out?”
Daisy sniffed. “Well, I eavesdropped when those two bozos turned up demanding money and did some digging. I have my sources.”
“Didn’t expect you to be her biggest supporter,” Maddy said, arching a brow at me, a small smile on her face.
“Sounds like someone has to be if you four are sneaking around behind her back and doubting her.”
“I hope you’re supporting her from a purely platonic standpoint?” Daisy shot back.
“It’s none of your business what we are.” Damn these nosy women. “But it’s not something you need to be concerned about anymore,” I added, looking off into the distance.
“Oh no,” August moaned, her brows dipping in. “What happened?”
I picked at a bit of wood sticking out from the porch. “Hell if I know, although I expect it’s fallout from whatever happened last night.”
“Daisy!” Maddy growled and flicked Daisy on the nose.
“Ow! What was that for?”
“You started this whole thing and now you’ve ruined their relationship!”
“Good!”
“No, not good! You can’t mess around with people’s lives just because you don’t agree with what they’re doing. I bet Kat thinks your source was Jack.”
I zeroed in on Daisy. “Who is your source?”
Daisy whirled on me. “It doesn’t matter and it’s not anyone’s business.”
“Just like what’s going on financially with the ranch isn’t yours,” I added and had the satisfaction of watching her expression fall. “Just…” I floundered. “Be careful with whoever it is, and let me know if you ever need help dealing with them.”
Daisy’s expression softened slightly before her trademark resting face slipped back into place. Deciding I was done with the Cartwright sisters for the day, I waved goodbye and went back to the cabin.
I sat on the couch, and tried to work through my thoughts as I hugged Teddy who was ecstatic about spending so much time together.
I figured that Kat had assumed I’d spilled the beans to her sisters then she felt cornered so attacked me. My chest ached at the idea of my strong, proud woman feeling like everyone thought she wasn’t handling shit. If I ever needed someone to handle shit for me, I would pick her. She’d thought she wasn’t doing a good job, but she was. She’d kept this place running smoothly and tackled every problem that arose, planning a funeral, becoming a guardian, fending off debt collectors, managing without ranch hands and even an asshole bison. She was too hard on herself, and I could only imagine the knock to her pride this had caused.
But she’d hurt me too.
She’d thought so little of me that she assumed it was me who betrayed her confidence. For my own nefarious purposes, whatever those would be. She didn’t trust that I was a man of my word and all I wanted was to make things right with her family. She didn’t trust my actions, my hard work and my perseverance with her.
I’d been abandoned plenty in my life, I just wanted someone to show up for me. I wanted family and I’d stupidly thought I could find it here with these women, who owed me nothing.
I wanted to leave, to run away just like I’d told Kat. Only I had no idea where to go, I wasn’t exactly flush with cash and…
“Now I have you,” I said, ruffling Teddy’s fur. I stroked the sides of his face. “Where shall we go, boy?” I asked. He barked and leapt off the couch and stood by the door. “You wanna go right now?” I laughed. He barked again so I got up and opened the door. A walk might be good for clearing my head.
I closed the cabin door behind me and looked out at the sky. The sun was setting, giving the sky that gorgeous pinky orange glow that I missed looking at when I was in prison. Teddy’s bark distracted me and he charged off. I jogged after him and saw him run around the side of the house to the porch.
“Teddy, no!” I called.
I rounded the porch after him and saw Kat being huddled by her sisters. Teddy ran over to her and sat at her feet. She glanced down at him and stroked his head before she looked around for me.
Clearing my throat, I ordered, “Come on, boy.” I wanted to get out of here and not have to face her. Turns out she wanted the same thing. As soon as she saw me, she brushed past her sisters and went into the house.
“Teddy, come on!” I called again, anger lacing my voice. Daisy looked at me then her stare followed Kat into the house and frowned.
Teddy eventually found his way back to me but the joy was gone. I trudged along after him as we went on a twilight walk. He investigated all the bushes and trees. Stuck his nose in fallen hollow tree stumps and scared a sleepy squirrel or two. He was having the time of his life while I was lost in thoughts of Kat.
I shook my head, willing the thoughts away. But they stayed, even as we went back to the cabin, as I tried to sleep later that night, as me and Kat avoided each other for the rest of the week, and as I made it through my weekend shifts at the bar.
She wouldn’t leave my brain. She was embedded in my DNA, wouldn’t leave me alone and I couldn’t take much more.
Love sucked.
*
The following week on a random evening, there was a knock on the cabin door. Hope flared to life inside me and I ignored it, knowing it wouldn’t be Kat but still being disappointed when I opened the door and saw Daisy standing there.
“Are you lost?” I sighed.
She pursed her lips. “It’s taken a lot for me to come here, don’t make me regret it.”
I tipped my head in acknowledgement and stepped to the side to let her come in, confused as to why she was here. She looked around the cabin, poked through my bookshelf, peered into the bedroom before getting comfortable on my couch with my dog.
“Please, make yourself at home.”
“I will,” she replied, turning a full force smile on me.
“To what do I owe the…pleasure?” I tucked my hands into the pockets of my navy sweatpants and leaned against the fireplace.
“I’ve been hard on you,” she stated.
“I wouldn’t say that.”
She laughed and it made me laugh too which felt good, a welcome release.
“I’ve found it hard having you here, even harder to see you and Kat developing…something. I can only imagine how hard it must have been for her to put aside our issues and start seeing you, and I wasn’t very supportive of that.”
My throat closed at the mention of her name.
“I inadvertently fucked everything up for you two and I can’t really fix it. But I can help with the ranch. I have an idea to make this a guest ranch and I would like you to help me make a 3D model of the plans so I can present it to Kat.”
Whatever I’d been expecting when she came in, it wasn’t any of this. I got the feeling she didn’t want to have some gushy conversation or share feelings. It seemed like her acknowledgement of her feelings was also essentially the closest to an apology I was going to get. But I didn’t need one. I was just glad she was comfortable enough to be in my presence and that she sought my help, to do something for Kat. To support Kat.
Also, the idea of having something to create with my hands was exciting. I’d had no inspiration with my woodwork recently and hadn’t touched any of my tools, too busy moping around. The thought of creating something that would help the ranch was invigorating.
I pushed off from the fireplace and grabbed my toolbox. “Then let’s get to work.”