14. DANIELLE #2
We sat there playing card games until the sun had crept below the horizon.
I had been laughing, drinking, and sharing stories from the past with Cody for so long that I didn't even notice how much time had passed, and I hadn’t had any time to think about why we were there.
Before I knew it, half the beers were gone.
We finished the last game of Rummy we were playing, and Cody started putting the cards away.
"Going to bed so soon?" I asked him. It was only 8:30, and the desert night was just beginning to come alive with the sounds of nocturnal creatures.
"No, not at all. I'm just tired of getting my ass kicked in Rummy. Maybe Alex really did learn everything from you, hustler.” He raised the bottle to his lips, took a slow sip, then set it aside with a quiet clink as his eyes locked onto mine. “Let's talk."
My finger traced the rim of the beer can as I watched a coyote trot across the distant dunes. "About what?"
“I don’t know. Anything. I want to get to know you better.” He took another long sip of his beer. “We’re stuck together, might as well be friends, right?
“Ask me something. Anything you want to know.” I surprised myself with the boldness I had just offered up. I wasn’t open about much with anyone.
“Anything? Someone has had a lot to drink,” he laughed before continuing. “Okay, Danielle, what are you most afraid of?”
I took a new beer from the case and cracked it open as I thought about whether or not I was going to give him the honest answer to that.
“Having kids,” I finally muttered, looking down into my beer, hoping to turn invisible.
Cody seemed surprised by my answer. I’m sure he was expecting something more common— snakes, heights, spiders. I could see him trying to figure me out in his head.
“Why having kids?” He tilted his head, watching me closely.
I knew the night would turn serious if I answered that question.
Not even Alex knew of my deep and crushing fear of being a mother.
Maybe it was the beer, or maybe it was the way the desert night seemed to hold secrets so well, but at that moment, I just wanted to tell someone.
Maybe it was because I had no choice but to trust him, or because I knew I couldn’t spend the rest of my life trusting no one.
It was the first time I felt like someone wouldn't make me feel less of a person for my answer.
Just as I was about to speak, Cody interrupted my thoughts.
"You don't need to tell me if you don't want to," he said. I could see in his face that he felt bad for asking, for accidentally bringing some kind of trauma to the surface.
"I'm afraid of leaving them. Like my parents left me and Alex." I could feel the tears beginning to form in the corners of my eyes.
I took a sip of my beer to try and hide my face, focusing on the stars that were starting to appear in the darkened sky. That's when I felt the warmth of Cody's hand on mine, and even though his hand was warm and comforting, I felt a shock run through my body like electricity.
"Hey," he looked me right in the eyes with a sympathetic and caring look of concern, "I'm sorry for everything you've been through. I get it. I really do."
I knew he did. I could see why Alex and Cody became fast friends. Other than the annoying little sister to take care of, Cody and Alex had the same childhood. I smiled at him and wiped my eyes.
The evening breeze was cool and refreshing, and I refused to allow memories of the past to ruin what had been an otherwise wonderful evening. It was the first night in years when I wasn't worried about Alex, scared of Landon, or fighting for my life.
“Okay, Mr. Morgan,” I said with a smirk. He cringed the second the word ‘mister’ left my lips. On the long drive, he mentioned he hated his last name. I thought it suited him. “What’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever done?”
“Well,” I could tell this was going to be a good story, because he sat up in his chair and leaned closer to me over the table, “back on our second tour in Afghanistan, Alex and I had a day off. We weren’t allowed to leave camp, but we had been so sick of the usual shit we always did.
We got this bright idea to sneak off into town and find a bunch of food that we just had no clue what it was and see who could stomach more of it.
Long story short, I ended up in the med tent for almost a week and in a whole heap of trouble. ”
I was dying laughing. I could just imagine how sick he got, and trying to explain how he got that way. I’m sure Alex was just sitting on the sidelines laughing his ass off.
“I knew Alex was an idiot, but now I know why you two are best friends.”
“Very funny, Miss Traser.”
We went on for hours talking and sharing stories of growing up and the stupid things we used to do.
As much as I didn’t want to admit it, part of me was starting to enjoy Cody’s company.
I finished the last sip of my beer and tossed it into the empty box before checking the time. It was 2:30 in the morning.
“Holy crap. I think I need to head to bed,” I told Cody as I tried to get up.
“Here, let me help you.” Cody stood up and helped me walk to my room. Once I got settled in my bed, he said goodnight and left for his room.
-
I was bent over the mirror applying mascara, getting ready for my monthly dinner date with Alex, when Landon's voice blasted from our bedroom. The sudden shift in his tone made my hand freeze mid-stroke. I lowered the mascara wand and pressed my ear against the bathroom door. My heart was racing as I listened to plans unfold that I knew I wasn’t supposed to be hearing.
"I don't fucking care how busy you are, Thomas," he snarled into the phone. "This is the biggest run I've ever done, and you are not going to fucking bail on me. 1.3 million, man. Don't you want a part of that?"
The number hit me like a physical blow.
1.3 million?
My mind reeled trying to process what I was hearing. Landon was getting out of hand.
"That's what I thought...yeah...March 1st, 9 pm." His voice dropped to a whisper. "I swear, Thomas, you are a dead man if you aren't here."
March 1st. Just three days away. Before I could process anything more, the bathroom door exploded inward, catching me square in the face. I stumbled backward as spots appeared in my vision.
"What the fuck? Were you fucking eavesdropping, Danielle?" Landon's body loomed over me in a dominating stance. It was his favorite move when he wanted information out of me, and it worked every time. "What the fuck did you hear?"
I knew all too well the signs that something big was about to happen—the trembling in his hands, the prominent vein pulsing in his forehead, the dangerous flush creeping up his neck and across his face.
His fists were clenched so tight his knuckles had gone white.
I weighed my options, knowing I had mere seconds to choose between a lie and the truth. Either choice could prove devastating.
“A 1.3 million dollar run, Landon? Are you insane? You can’t keep doing this!”
He inched closer to me with predatory precision, trying to threaten me. I moved backward without looking, dragging my palm along the wall until it caught the knob. The bathroom suddenly felt like it was caving in around me, taking the oxygen with it.
If I can just make it to the hallway, where the neighbors might hear, where someone might help...
My heart was frantic as I calculated my chances of escape. The look in his eyes was different this time. Cold. Dark. Something had snapped.
"So, you fucking heard everything?" He spoke with a calm demeanor, the kind that made my skin crawl more than if he’d shouted. "How many times do I have to tell you, Danielle, to stay the fuck out of my business?"
He flung his hands toward the walls, the floor, at me—wherever the anger landed— getting louder and more out of control now.
"What do you think pays for this apartment and all the shit in it? My work. So, I suggest you shut the fuck up and stay the hell out of it!"
I don’t know where I suddenly got the balls to snap and stand up for myself.
Maybe it was the accumulated weight of every bruise he'd ever given me, or the false security of knowing Alex was expecting me in minutes.
Whatever the reason, something in me finally broke.
After all these years of cowering, I chose this terrible moment to find my voice.
"No, Landon." The words came out stronger than I expected. "Not anymore. This is crazy. I can't do this anymore. I'm telling Alex about the run."
As I turned toward the door, I heard the whistle of something cutting through the air behind me. Then came the sickening crack of wood meeting skull, and my world exploded into darkness.
-
I woke up, already thrashing and screaming before I even opened my eyes.
Pain didn’t matter in the moment; I was in full-blown fight or flight mode.
Cold sweat drenched my shirt as terror ran through every vein in my body, the phantom feeling of being trapped in that apartment with Landon taking over.
Before my scream for help could escape, strong arms scooped me up, and pure survival instinct took over. I lashed out in the dark, fists flying at the unseen aggressor, ignoring the searing pain shooting through my injured leg.
"Danielle! Danielle, stop! It's me, Cody, you're okay!"
His voice tore through my panic like a knife through butter. I froze mid-struggle, looking up at him with wild eyes, my breath coming in ragged gasps.
My heartbeat slowed, and the room started to take shape again, but the trembling in my body became uncontrollable. The fight drained from me all at once, and I collapsed against his chest, heaving massive sobs into his tank top.
"It's okay," he whispered as his eyes met mine, one arm holding me secure while his other hand brushed my sweat-dampened hair from my face. "You're okay. You're safe. I'm here."
All at once, I realized that what I saw wasn't just some nightmare; they were memories, and I jerked away from him with sudden clarity.
"I remember," I gasped, gripping his shoulders. "Oh my God, I remember everything, Cody. We need to call Alex. I have to tell him what I know."
I scrambled to get out of bed, frenzied and desperate.
"Where's the phone?"
Urgency superseded pain as I searched the room, determined to tell Alex before these crucial memories could slip away again. "I need to tell him now!"
“Whoa, whoa, calm down. Please, sit down, don’t hurt yourself.”
Cody raced to his bedroom and came back and handed me the phone. I struggled to dial Alex’s number through my panic. It was 4 AM. I didn’t care. A very tired, very asleep Alex answered the phone.
“Cody? What the hell? It’s 4 AM. What’s happened?”
“It’s not Cody, it’s me.” I didn’t realize how much I was still panicking until I spoke. My voice was broken, and, just like that, I regretted calling Alex, knowing he’d worry that something was wrong.
“Danielle?! What’s wrong? Where's Cody?”
“It’s okay, Alex, he’s here. We’re fine. Alex…I remember things from that night.”
I spent ten minutes telling him everything: about the 1.3 million dollar run, the man named Thomas, everything. By the end of the call, the anxiety was gone, and all I felt was relief. Hopefully, this helped Alex find him. It had to.
“Danielle, you don’t know how helpful this is. I’m going to the station right now. I love you.”
“I love you, too.” I hung up the phone and handed it back to Cody.
“Are you going to be okay?” Cody asked.
“Yes.” He turned around and proceeded to walk out of my bedroom door. “Actually, Cody,” I paused.
“Yes?”
“I’m scared. Will you stay with me?” Part of me couldn’t believe I had asked him, but a bigger part of me was so terrified that I couldn’t imagine being alone.
"Of course," his voice was calm and endearing as he made his way around to the other side of the bed.
The mattress dipped slightly as he settled beside me. I turned my head to look at him in the dim light, appreciating how he maintained a careful distance, ever the gentleman. He lay there on his back, eyes fixed on the ceiling, his presence both protective and undemanding.
There was something profoundly comforting about sharing this space with someone who had promised to keep me safe, yet asked nothing in return. In that moment of security, I didn’t toss or turn. My body just...gave in, like it remembered how to feel safe again.