Chapter 5 #3
“C,” he grunted. When his fingers tightened around my hair, I looked up at him. “Keep looking at me like that and see what happens.”
Just to push him, I hollowed my cheeks and used my tongue to tease the sensitive underside of his shaft. His thighs trembled under my hands, making me feel powerful. When he pulled me up by my hair, his dick yanked out of my mouth with a pop.
“I need you,” he confessed, cupping my face and kissing me sloppily.
Those three simple words wrecked me. Him lowering me onto his dick finished me off.
The way he angled his hips and pushed into me from below made the world tilt on its axis.
I rocked greedily, meeting each of his strokes.
His strong arms held my chest flush against him as he rocked his body, rocking my world with each deep stroke.
I clawed at his back as my walls clenched around him.
“Gah damn!” he professed like he was witnessing a miracle. “You be trying to embarrass a nigga making him cum all fast.”
“Kan . . . non.” My voice shattered around his name before I said it over and over like a mantra and a prayer. “Kannon. Kannon. Kannon,” I whispered as I held onto him for dear life.
“I got you, baby.”
“Don’t let me go.”
“I won’t.”
I believed him.
We collapsed into each other, falling over on the floor, then laughing like we were high.
Damp clunks of my hair stuck to the sides of my face until Kannon reached over and swept them away.
I kissed his cheek just to touch him again and because he was so adorable.
He kissed my forehead then took my hand and helped me up.
We showered together. Well, mostly, he held me up against his body and let the hot water soothe my sore muscles.
When my legs could hold me, he stood behind me and used my peaches and cream shampoo to give me a heavenly scalp massage.
I closed my eyes while he washed and conditioned my hair like it was just something we did all the time.
While his gentle fingers rinsed the conditioner out, I burst out crying for no good reason other than being overwhelmed with gratefulness for the way he cared for me.
I couldn’t remember when someone had done anything for me without the presence of cameras and reporters.
Kannon didn’t ask anything of me, but what he gave me was everything.
“Carrie, what’s wrong, baby?” he asked, cupping my face and tilting my head back so he could look into my eyes.
“Nothing,” I lied.
“It’s not nothing. You’re crying.”
“I’m fine.”
“You’re lying, Carteay. What’s wrong?”
“I’m probably just tired or something. It’s nothing,” I said, snatching away and putting my head under the water, hoping to hide my tears.
“Is it Cyrus?” he asked. When I didn’t respond, he pressed. “Talk to me.”
“Kannon, please.”
“Don’t do that to me, Carteay. Don’t shut me out, baby.”
“Kannon, just drop it!”
He didn’t respond. That was my cue to turn around and finish my shower. I gasped when Kannon’s chest hit my back. The palm of his hand was on my throat in an instant. My pulse hammered against the base of his hand as his grip on my neck tightened.
“Carteay, you are mine to care for, fuck, and protect. I need you to tell me what’s wrong so I can fix it.”
“You can’t fix everything, Kannon.”
“Try me,” he countered. “I can help you.”
I shook my head. I refused to let the words leave my mouth. I refused to drag Kannon into my messy life. He had already done and been more than enough.
“Kannon!” I shrieked when he turned me and used his hold on my neck to press my face against the wall.
He put his mouth close to my ear before he spoke. “The only thing I want to hear coming out of your mouth is the answer to my question, Carrie.”
“I told you it was nothing.”
Kannon used his knee to separate my thighs before pushing his dick into my already aching tunnel. I whimpered and threw my head back against his chest. He held me in place with his hand on my throat.
“I don’t like this shit, Carteay. Don’t shut down on me,” he said, kissing my shoulder and anchoring my body to him with a hand on my hip.
“I’m not.”
“Well talk,” he demanded, pounding into me a little harder.
“Kannon,” I whimpered.
“I love it when you say my name, baby, but right now, I need you to be telling me what the fuck is wrong and how to make it better.”
“You-you can’t.”
Kannon didn’t respond as he yanked my left arm behind my back, hooking his arm through it before grabbing my right arm and holding them both behind me.
He pulled my arms, causing my head to fall back until I was looking up at the ceiling.
I screamed to the ceiling in blissful agony while Kannon took his frustration with me out on my pussy.
His hips slammed into me from behind more vigorously.
“Fucking tell me, Carteay.”
The way his voice shattered on my name snatched a confession out of me.
“I’m scared that I have to give you up soon. I’m falling for you, and I don’t want to leave you,” I cried.
That slowed his pace. Both arms circled my middle as he pulled me closer to him.
“Carteay, listen to me, baby. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. I can help you. You have to let me help you.”
“You don’t know these people, Kannon. They’re dangerous.”
“I can handle them.”
“Even if you could, I can’t drag you into my shit. You mean too much to me, Kannon. Promise you’ll let me figure it out.”
He angled my head and kissed the corner of my mouth. “I don’t want to lie to you.”
“Well then say it and mean it.”
“You’re worried about falling for me when I’m already on the ground.”
“Say it, Kannon,” I pled.
“Put your hands on the wall,” he instructed.
I followed his command, placing my hands on the wall before looking back at him.
Slowly, he continued to stroke into me from behind.
His face morphed into something beautiful and anguished as he watched me watching him fuck me.
The stream of the shower hit him at an angle, causing water to trickle down his arms and chest. He looked sinful when he tightened his grip on my waist and parted his lips.
“Car . . . tea . . . ay Hoyt.” He panted, breaking my name into four parts and rocking into me harder as he came. “You are fucking mi-mine to protect.”
He pulled out of me and kissed the back of my head before getting out of the shower like his word was final. I guess it was.
We ended up in bed, feeding each other green grapes and arguing about if red or green grapes were better. The ones he had were good, but I was still team red grapes.
“What was your favorite cartoon growing up?”
“Powerpuff Girls.”
“Which one was your favorite, and why is it Buttercup?”
I narrowed my eyes. “How did you know? I feel like I probably told you this before.”
“Just a good guess. You’re tough like her. I liked the monkey.”
I laughed. “You like the villain, fool?”
He shrugged like it should have been obvious. “Of course.”
He turned on the TV because I didn’t like falling asleep without it.
Kannon fell asleep first. I liked that because it meant he let his guard down enough to rest around me.
I kissed his shoulder, relishing the taste of his skin on my lips as I rested my head on his chest. As I listened to his heartbeat, I promised myself that I wouldn’t say the word love out loud.
I had come too close in the shower earlier.
My timing was horrendous. How could I fall in love with someone at a time like this?
Still, as I pulled the sheets up around us, I pressed my lips to the side of his neck and closed my eyes, knowing that I could only lie to myself for so long.
Love wasn’t something you could just erase by not speaking on it.