Chapter 6
Chapter
Six
Kannon
Six days felt like a lifetime. Still, it was nowhere near enough.
When I opened my eyes, Carrie was already up.
I spotted her curled up in the recliner in my room, with her feet tucked under her.
She looked angelic with the sunrays beaming on her face.
I watched as she chewed on the end of a pen before scribbling something in that notebook that seemed to be glued to her hand.
She sang a few lines then corrected it before singing the verse all the way through.
“Keep going,” I requested, almost making her jump out of her skin.
“I didn’t know you were awake.”
“Keep singing.”
She flashed one of those smiles that felt like medicine, then sang the song again. Nothing else existed in the moment. It wasn’t fancy or overdone. It was just right. My chest felt weird. I sat up as she finished.
“It needs a bridge.”
“It’ll come to you. How long have you been working on it?”
“It was in my head all night. I had to get up and get it out.”
“Sing it again,” I asked, just because I wanted to hear it.
When she did, she looked at me as if I might have an idea of how to proceed. “On ‘Just for Your Love,’ you repeated part of the first verse for the hook. I think that would work for this one. Where you say I want to stay anchored in you. Use that.”
“I’ll play with it.”
“It’s good so far.”
The day went on, and I enjoyed soaking up every moment I could with Carrie. When night fell, I put on one of the songs she’d sent me when we first met that never made the album but was double platinum in my house. I loved the honesty in her voice. When she recognized it, her eyes went wild.
“Turn that off.” She fussed like playing the song might make the monsters come out.
“No,” I said, walking toward her with my hand extended. “Dance with me.”
Her coy smile was cute. “You don’t dance.”
“I’m waiting,” I told her, never dropping my hand.
She stood from her place on the couch, rolling her eyes to hide the way they sparkled.
Once her hand was in mine, I pulled her to me and put my hand on her waist. As we swayed to the music, she put her head on my chest. I felt the vibration as she hummed the song under her breath.
She was right. I wasn’t a dancer. Still, I wanted this moment with her.
“C,” I said with my face buried in her hair.
“Hm?”
The words in my head died on my lips. I wanted to tell Carteay that spending the past few days with her had fucked up my sense of time and space. I needed her to know that an hour with her felt like a whole day, and a month away from her would feel more like a year.
I wanted to let her know that the idea of another nigga touching her without showing her complete reverence made me homicidal.
I wanted to tell her that I would build a whole new world for her if it meant she would be safe there.
I couldn’t say any of that shit though. Not yet anyway.
I let the song say the things I couldn’t.
Instead, I kept quiet and buried my nose in her hair, trying to memorize that peach shampoo.
She shifted her weight to look up at me. I looked down, still trying to find the right words to say to her.
“Don’t look at me like that, Kannon,” she whispered.
“Like what?”
“Like you already know how this is going to end.”
“I don’t. That’s the scary part. I just know I don’t want it to.” That was probably the truest thing I could say.
She nodded as she tiptoed and kissed me. “Say it, Kannon.”
I wasn’t sure what she meant exactly, but it didn’t matter. The answer would be the same either way.
“Anything, Carteay,” I assured her, kissing her forehead. “Everything. That’s what I would do and give to have this forever.”
Her response was a smile that did something funny to my heart.
As I looked down into her eyes, she looked like mine.
I’d be damned if that wasn’t fucking with my head.
I moved to the couch, dragging her with me before flopping down and pulling her feet into my lap.
After passing her the remote, I got comfortable on the couch while rubbing her feet.
When I noticed that she never turned the TV on, I lifted my head so I could look at her face.
“What’s up?”
She was hesitant as she looked my way. Her eyes moved from me to the coffee table then back to me. “I-uh kinda want to check my socials and send my sister a message to let her know I’m fine. I don’t even know if she knows I’m off the radar. It’s starting to bother me.”
“You sure you’re up for that?”
I hated the thought of her seeing the plethora of bullshit that was probably out there.
I had on good authority that her being missing in action had been kept low-key, but that didn’t mean there weren’t rumors swirling around.
Some of those bloggers were as resourceful as they were treacherous.
As much as I wanted to protect her from whatever they were spewing, I knew I couldn’t treat her like a child.
I would be no better than her label if I did that.
“I know I can’t hide forever. I might as well see what the damage is.”
I took a deep breath, hoping that I didn’t regret letting her open a can of worms when she was finally remembering how to be happy and free.
I couldn’t hide her forever, but we had been so perfect in our bubble I wanted to enjoy it as long as I could.
I had Blaine taking care of most of the business so I could lay low with her.
I leaned forward and picked up my tablet off the table before passing it to Carteay.
“The password is 1234.”
She burst out laughing. “How will I ever remember?”
“If you forget it, just ask me again. I’m sitting right here.” I shrugged.
She laughed. “Whatever.”
“I don’t know how good your memory is, girl.”
“I just can’t believe you’re giving it to me.”
“My password? I don’t have any top-secret files or anything to hide on it.”
“I mean the tablet,” she clarified.
“Why not? I’m not here to control you. If you want to see what’s out there, go ahead. Just remember not to let none of the shit you might see get in your head. Those people don’t know the difference between their ass and a hole in the ground, let alone real and fake.”
She nodded as she punched in the code to unlock the tablet.
I watched her face for any sign of distress as she scrolled and read what was on the screen.
For a while, her facial expressions didn’t give away much.
Eventually, she smiled at something, making me relax a little.
Maybe it wasn’t as bad as she was expecting.
Her people probably realized that she needed a break and were giving her time to come around.
Somehow, that sounded too good to be true.
I didn’t miss the very second her smile dimmed.
I wanted to snatch the tablet from her and throw it across the room but thought better of it.
Carteay was a big girl. She would tell me if she needed me.
Still, the reaction put a knot in my stomach.
“You good?” I asked, trying to sound casual as I finally turned the TV on.
“Um, yeah, just a few things that made me roll my eyes.”
For more than one reason, I didn’t believe what she said.
Still, I decided not to push, not yet anyway.
I would give her time to come around if she wanted to talk.
Just maybe it wasn’t as bad as I thought.
I lifted her foot, kissing the side of it before pulling her closer.
I kissed the side of her head, holding her body tight against mine.
I needed her to understand that the past week hadn’t just been about fucking the time away while I helped her hide out.
I wanted her to know that I would always be here for her.
I took the tablet from her hand and placed it back on the table before lying back and pulling her onto my chest. I held her and kissed the top of her head, hoping to remind her that she was safe.
I didn’t have to repeat that she was mine to protect.
She knew that. Her hands gripped my biceps as she cozied up in her rightful place.
“You sure you good, Carrie?” I asked after a minute.
She raised her eyes. I could tell she was trying to read my expression.
Hopefully there was no sign of the fear and anxiety I felt bubbling right under the surface.
I was worried about her. I couldn’t shake the way her smile died so quickly.
Her attempt to correct it only made it worse.
She took a deep breath, and for a second, I thought she was going to tell me what was on her mind.
“I’m fine, Kannon.”
Her words shattered me. Not just because it was a lie, but because she didn’t trust me to protect her from whatever she’d seen.
I needed her to trust me to fix the shit she’d been swindled into.
I knew I could get her out of that predatory contract; I just needed to know where to start. For now, I had to let it go.
“Come on. Let me finish teaching your ass how to play spades,” I told her, deciding to lighten the mood.
After too many hands of me trying to teach her how to bid while we drank shots of tequila, she curled up against me and fell asleep on my chest. I was tired too, so I carried her to my bed. I probably watched her for too long as I willed myself to let her come to me in her own time.
I wanted to fix whatever ailed my baby. I would and could protect her from whatever was out there waiting for her. I could handle whatever monsters she thought she had to hide from. I just needed her to let me do it.
Sooner or later, we would have to come out of our bubble.
I needed her to trust me to keep her safe.
I didn’t want to be another person coming into her life trying to control her and impose my will.
I wanted her to come to me with her problem instead of bullying my way in and forcing her to accept my help.