Chapter 19
Austin
I wake up to my phone buzzing, and I panic, thinking I’m alone.
“Hey.” Gray kisses my shoulder. “Your phone’s on the nightstand. Should I get it?”
My thoughts are slow and my limbs heavy, but I shake my head and roll over.
“Shit. I forgot about King. He wanted to text, but now he’s calling.” I fumble to answer but miss the call and jab the buttons to call him back.
Gray eases away, but I fling my arm out to stop him. He probably wants to give me privacy, but I need him next to me.
“Hey, sorry, I fell asleep. But I’m here.” I rush to say when King answers.
“Nah, man, you’re good. I was just checking in because you’ve never not answered a text within three seconds of receiving it.” His voice is light, and there isn’t a hint of stress.
“Yeah, I crashed hard.” I scoot back to get closer to Gray.
“Go rest up. We can talk tomorrow.”
“Are you sure? I’m available now.” My body relaxes when Gray’s arm encircles me and his hand splays on my chest.
“All good, captain. See ya tomorrow.” King hangs up before I can argue.
“Do you have any idea what that was about?” Gray asks in my ear, sending a shiver through me.
“Not a clue. Should I be worried?” I spin in his arms so we’re face-to-face.
King is one of our best players, and I’m responsible for keeping him safe.
He receives more trash talk than the rest of us simply for the color of his skin, and King won’t tell me specifics, so I can’t report the players.
When he comes out, it will be worse. He’s only out to the team and his family.
“No. He’s a grown man, and you offered your help. He sounded fine. Actually, more worried about his derelict captain than himself. Find him tomorrow. King will be good tonight.”
I’m tempted to call King back, but that would imply he’s incapable of advocating for himself.
“Here.” He hands me a sports drink full of electrolytes. “You need this. Are you ready to eat yet?”
“Are you babying me, Ward?” I can’t decide whether I’m annoyed or like it.
“Oh, the last-naming me hurts.” He motions for me to drink. “It won’t stop me from taking care of you. You go out of your way to ensure all your players have what they need. Let me spend a few minutes doing something for you.”
“You’re ruthless,” I say with no heat, then chug the drink. “Happy?”
“So happy.” He leans in for a kiss, and my stomach swoops like I’m on a rollercoaster.
We kiss while our hands explore each other. It feels right. Like this is how we’re supposed to be together.
“Let me see your ass.” Gray nudges me and I comply. “Don’t kill me, but I left some marks, and it’s going to be hard to hide them.” He places a chaste kiss on each cheek. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’m not.” He’s opening me up to things I’d never have the courage to do without him. Because I trust him, I can explore another side of myself. A side I thought I had to keep on a leash or hide completely.
“What are you going to tell the team? You know they aren’t going to let it slide. They gossip more than the tabloids.”
“I’ll come to your treatment room and change into my base layer while you wrap my knuckles. I opened the wound from the other night, and you, being the extra cautious trainer, will bandage me so there’s no chance of blood on the ice.” It’s a solid plan, and of course he agrees.
“Did you like what we did?” he asks timidly.
“Do you understand the meaning of the word stupendous?” I rake my hand over his face, and he kisses my palm.
“An orgasm tends to make people sex-drunk, and I’m specifically asking about the spanking part.” He face-rakes me back.
I haul him on top of me and knead his ass. “I did. It surprised me how much. Enough that we should do it again.”
“Yeah?” His kiss is slow, like it’s the only thing we have to do all night.
I love how his hair drapes over me in this position. I nod, not breaking the kiss.
He speaks directly into my mouth. “Will you spank me another day?”
“You think we should wait?” I’m relieved and disappointed.
“You got spanked and had anal sex for the first time. It’s been a big day. We don’t have to do all the things today. We can spread out the fun.” He grinds on me. “The most important thing is that you’re comfortable with it.”
“The videos made a huge difference in modeling communication and how to do it. It makes me nervous about losing control, but I’m not uncomfortable.” My fingers trace each bump on his spine.
“You didn’t seem out of control in a bad way when you were fucking me. But you weren’t careful, and I loved it. At any point, were you concerned?”
My brain scratches and replays that he loved it. A sense of pride that I’m not used to when it comes to sex wells in me. I’ve enjoyed sex, but I loved it with Gray. For once in my life, I have the confidence and courage to try new things.
“Tinny?” He asks with distress since I haven’t spoken.
“Sorry,” I say, going lax and spreading out my arms and legs. “I was basking in the glow of your praise.” I almost say it without laughing, but it bubbles out.
Gray pinches my nipple. “Don’t change the subject.”
That wasn’t my intention, but I’ve never liked examining my feelings. “I felt wild and on the verge of rutting you like an animal until I passed out, but the darkness stayed away.” I cover my eyes with my forearm.
Gray won’t let me hide and removes my arm. “That’s great.”
“Most people don’t require coddling after sex,” I grumble, hearing the resentment in my tone.
“One, I’m not coddling you, and two, if we’re going to do any sort of kink, it’s standard practice to check in with each other after the session.” Gray boops my nose.
I swat his hand away. “Now you’re being an asshole.” My grin negates my words.
“Not to brag, but I got the impression that you’re kinda sorta obsessed with my asshole.” He shimmies his torso, and his thick dark eyebrows draw attention to his sensual eyes.
“Obsessed after one time?” I tut like he’s absurd. “Fine. Maybe a little,” I concede.
“Perfect. Because I’m hooked on you like heroin.”
“Should I be offended?” Being compared to a narcotic isn’t something I ever imagined, yet I love it.
“Nope. But back to sex. I trust you. You won’t hurt me, and I need you to trust I’ll tell you if you ever cross a line.
We’re in this together, and I won’t do something I don’t like to spare your feelings.
We have years of friendship that would be ruined by lying to you.
And I expect the same. Tell me the moment the darkness appears. ”
Gray is going to challenge me to open up to him, and that scares me.
“I can do that.” I swallow hard, making the commitment to him and myself.
He reaches for his phone. “Let’s buy a flogger.”
I’m dizzy with desire.