Chapter 11
Ash plops down on the bed, listening to the shower run. The disgust on Kieran’s face stung, he’s not gonna lie. He’s been on the receiving end of many of Kieran’s expressions, ranging from indignation, to annoyance, to outright rage.
Kieran hadn’t been very pleased when Ash first started pursuing him two years ago, flirting shamelessly and making it no secret how Ash really felt about him.
But underneath all the anger and resistance, Ash was able to feel how flattered Kieran had been.
A part of him had always been desperate to be desired and accepted despite his less than charming personality traits (except Ash has always found them very charming).
So, he’s used to Kieran looking at him with a vast variety of emotions.
But he’s never looked at him with disgust. Or betrayal.
Yeah, that one hurt a lot.
Why hadn’t Kieran told him this would happen?
Okay, he probably worried he’d mess up the timelines or something—Ash blames the Star Trek marathon they indulged in together—but he could’ve hinted.
Prepared Ash a little. Not for his sake, but for Kieran’s—this Kieran’s, the version of him from two years ago that has no idea what it’s like to be loved unconditionally, accepted wholeheartedly.
Kieran might’ve had his reasons for not telling Ash, but why did he have sex with him last night?
He should’ve been more considerate of his past self.
Instead, he’d all but pounced on Ash the minute they got back to the room from a night swim.
Now that Ash thinks about it, there had been something desperate about Kieran last night, a sense of urgency that Ash attributed to simply being a little buzzed and relaxed from the vacation.
It all makes sense now.
Of course, if he’d used his ability, he could’ve foreseen this happening.
But he and Kieran have a deal: no mind reading unless Kieran gives him permission, or unless he starts spiraling and needs Ash to calm him down.
Just like moments ago. And even if Ash broke that deal—not a chance—it would be useless.
After Ash and Gabe taught him the basics, Kieran’s become very skilled at blocking out any intrusion to his mind.
Not because he needed to be protected from them, but to help him feel more in control.
So when Ash had a look at his thoughts this morning and found no barrier, no resistance, he’d known something wasn’t right. Not to mention Kieran’s thoughts had been pure chaos, most of them referring to the night two years ago. The last thing Kieran remembers.
What a mess.
And on top of that, Zeke is apparently a witch. And doesn’t know it. Great.
It might be better if he doesn’t find out.
Ash has always been of the opinion that people should understand themselves, learn as much as they can about who they are, and not just when it comes to supernatural things.
He’s a therapist, for crying out loud. But Zeke?
Yeah, he’s a bit worried that if Zeke finds out, he’ll be selling love potions on Ebay, then end up in jail for poisoning people.
That’s the best-case scenario. The worst-case scenario? He’ll start messing with Ouija boards.
“Holy shit!”
Springing to his feet, Ash barges into the bathroom without knocking.
“Kieran? Are you okay?” He sounded pretty freaked out, but Ash finds him standing in front of the mirror, a towel wrapped around his hips and a look of disbelief on his face while water drips from his body and hair onto the tiles.
Ironically, Ash’s mouth goes dry. No matter how many times he sees Kieran naked, or almost naked, it never fails to steal his breath away.
Okay, focus!
“What is this?” Kieran demands.
Focus, I said. Swallowing several times, Ash looks for something, anything, out of place. “This?”
“I’m ripped!” Kieran points at his abs, then flexes his elbow to show off his toned bicep. “What— How?”
Ash bites back a grin. “Shockingly, through exercise.”
“Impossible.” Kieran shakes his head. “We don’t do that.”
“We?”
“Me, and my lack of desire to put myself through unnecessary pain.”
“You’d be surprised how amenable you can be when properly motivated,” Ash mutters, but Kieran hears it anyway.
“The fuck are you talking about? And stop smiling like that. I hate it.”
“I know.” God, this man is adorable and he doesn’t have a clue.
“Dick,” Kieran huffs. His expression suddenly changes, a flash of hurt passing over his features. “You make me exercise, don’t you? You were ashamed of my skinny ass and manipulated me into feeling insecure, didn’t you?”
Ash sighs. It stings, not just because he can’t help but take it personally, but especially because he’s reminded of how self-deprecating Kieran used to be.
On the other hand, Ash realizes with glee. I get to show him how wrong he is all over again.
That’s definitely something to look forward to.
“First of all, you were already insecure to begin with,” he tells Kieran matter-of-factly.
“Hey—!”
“Secondly, I doubt anyone could make you do anything.”
Kieran’s teeth snap together, his protest dying.
“And thirdly, unless you want to have your very delicious ass spanked bright red, I suggest you never speak of yourself negatively in front of me ever again.”
“Y-you…” Kieran sputters, his hands protectively coming down to cover his butt as he takes a wobbly step back. So. Freaking. Adorable. “Stay away from my ass.”
“Then don’t tempt me.”
Shifting on his feet nervously, Kieran clears his throat. “Okay, so…if you’re not the one pushing me to do it, why did I start exercising?”
“I never said I wasn’t involved,” Ash says mysteriously. Explaining it now would only freak Kieran out further.
“I knew it!”
What a drama queen. God, Ash loves him, every version of him.
He’s also high-key getting horny watching Kieran throw a tantrum.
“I just gave you the right motivation.”
“Yeah, well, it smells fishy. If you weren’t ashamed of me, why did you care anyway?”
“Might’ve had something to do with your abysmal cholesterol results the last time you had your blood tests done.”
Kieran’s silence only confirms he’s well aware of the problem.
“I could’ve just cut down on the bacon,” he grumbles, not very convincingly.
“Well, just so you know, I’m not doing that shit now.
” He crosses his arms on his chest. It makes his muscles pop out even more, and Ash has to start thinking some very gross things.
“My future self is welcome to torture himself again when he’s back, but I’m going on hiatus. ” He sniffs. “So…”
“Yes?”
“You promised me drinks.”
“I don’t believe that’s what I said, but okay.”
“It was implied!”
“Okay, okay.” Ash holds his hands up. “But don’t you think it’s a little early for that? Also, you drank last night.”
“Never too early, especially on a vacation. And that wasn’t me.”
“It was this body.”
“Not my tastebuds, though.”
“Right.” Stubborn little shit. He’s lucky he’s cute.
Well, at least he’s not threatening to hop on a plane and leave right away. You win some, you lose some. Ash will take whatever he can get at this point.
Since what he gets is Kieran, he can’t really complain.
“You know what? You were right. This isn’t too bad,” Kieran admits halfway through his second margarita.
For someone who’s just learned he’s been sucked into his future and is dating a man, he seems pretty relaxed; spread out on a lounger by the pool, a pair of sunnies on his nose and a slightly tipsy smile on his lips.
After two years of only touching alcohol on occasion, and only under the condition that he’s feeling good instead of shitty before he drinks, he’ll have his head down the toilet in no time if he doesn’t watch it.
“Glad you’re enjoying yourself,” Ash comments, hopefully not too dryly. “Maybe you could enjoy yourself at a slower pace?”
“Why? It’s free.”
“Well, you only have one liver.”
“With three lobes. Only need one to survive.”
“That’s not—” He stops himself. Gosh, this makes him feel so conflicted.
He loves Kieran’s snarky nature, loves how Kieran challenges him at every turn, but the circumstances are less than ideal.
If this was his Kieran—scratch that; present Kieran, because Kieran is his no matter what—Ash would find a hundred and one ways to deal with him.
But these are uncharted waters. This Kieran doesn’t trust him.
Doesn’t know him. Hell, he probably doesn’t even like him. Not enough for it to matter.
Okay, desperate times…
“Be right back,” Ash lets him know as he gets to his feet. “Need to pop to the restroom.”
“You don’t need to tell me every single thing,” Kieran says, scowling.
He’s really not holding himself back with the defiant act, and Ash’s Pavlovian reflexes respond accordingly.
Sometimes present Kieran will do this too.
Crank up the heat just to see how far he can push it before Ash snaps.
It usually ends with Kieran crying and writhing and begging, promising it’s never gonna happen again.
The promise generally lasts a few weeks before he gets bored and starts testing Ash again. The little brat.
Ash highly doubts that’s what Kieran’s trying to do right now.
Except his nervous system can’t identify the difference, making him react like a well-trained dog.
His fingers tingle and itch to reach for Kieran, grab hold of him and show him exactly what consequences his actions will lead to. To show him who he belongs to.
Not this time. Not this Kieran. So calm the hell down.
Clenching and unclenching his hand, he heads towards the restrooms. With a glance over his shoulder to confirm that Kieran’s not paying him any mind, he changes direction and walks up to the bar instead.
“Hey, Jyoti.” He shoots the bartender his trademark, charming smile.
“Hey. Starting early today, I see.” She nods in the direction of the pool, where Kieran is just throwing back whatever is left in his glass.