Chapter 5
CHAPTER FIVE
TYLER
“ H i, Mom, what’s up?” Something must have happened. She never called on game day, before the game. “Everyone okay?” My heart pounded.
“I’m so sorry to call right now, and I didn’t want to tell you this on a game day, but it’s important. Honey, I’m in the hospital.” She breathed into the phone. “I just got off a call with your brother?—”
“The hospital?” As my chest pinched, I glanced at Rowan, twisting around at the side of his bed with his suit slung over his arm. Fucking hell. How would I deal with this and being in the same room with him?
Rowan laid the suit on his bed, stepped over, and sat beside me, his gaze locked on me.
“What’s going on, Mom?” I gripped the phone tighter. “Was there an accident?” And if so, was Dad okay?
“No, not an accident.” She huffed. “You know those spells I’ve been having? Well, it got worse, and I could barely walk this week. Your father thought I was having some kind of stroke, so he took me to the ER.”
“Okay.” I worried my lower lip as Rowan placed his warm hand on my back. I glanced at him and the wrinkles on his forehead. Jesus, he was so close. And he cared .
“The doctors ran some tests—an MRI and a spinal fluid thing that was really unpleasant.” She inhaled deeply. “Tyler, it turns out I have multiple sclerosis. I’ve probably had it for years, but my doctor never checked.” She scoffed. “I’m getting a new primary care doc. I told you he wasn’t listening to me.”
“Cheri, let me talk to him.” Dad’s voice filtered through the phone.
“No, Frank. I want to tell him myself,” she said.
With my vision blurring, I slumped against Rowan’s side. As my voice cracked, I said, “Fuck.” Did people die from this? How long did she have to live? How would my dad cope? He didn’t know how to run a household or even cook for himself.
Rowan wrapped an arm around my shoulders. In a whisper, he said, “I’ve got you.”
I gazed into his deep-blue eyes, focused on me. God, it felt good to be with him right now. “Mom, tell it to me straight. Do you need me to come home? Can they treat it?” I didn’t know much about the disease, but if it had been left untreated all this time?—
“Yes, I’m on some IV drugs, steroids and other things. The doctor said they have to determine what type of MS I have, and when this flare-up—that’s what they call it—settles down, they’ll send me home with medication and a treatment plan.”
I huffed a sigh. “Good, so you’re not going to die.”
Rowan tightened his hold on me.
“Die? No, honey. I’m sorry. It’s not that bad.” She tsked. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
Straightening, I raked my fingers through my hair. Thank God, it was treatable. It still didn’t sound good though. “Okay, do you need me to come home? Is Nathan coming home?”
“No, you don’t need to come home. Don’t let this bother you too much. I’ll be fine,” Mom said. “I just wanted you both to know what was happening. I’m not sure how I’ll be when you two come home for the holidays. That’s all. I didn’t want it to be a big downer for everyone.”
“Oh, okay.” I stared at Rowan’s open bag on his bed, my mind swirling. I had so many questions but didn’t know what to ask first. I’d ask Doctor Google instead so she could rest. “H-how is everything else?”
“It’s fine, honey. We’re going to get through this, okay? Your father has great health insurance, and if I need it, I can get in-home care. But I don’t think I’ll need it.”
Nodding, I swallowed a lump sliding up my throat. In-home care …why, because she’d be bedridden or something? “Yeah, okay then.”
“Aren’t you in North Dakota tonight?” Her voice became lighter.
“Yeah, we play the Hawks tonight and tomorrow night.” She was trying to change the subject. I straightened, leaving Rowan’s side.
He dropped his arm from my shoulders but kept his gaze on me and bit his thumbnail.
“Well, have a good game and though I know you’re going to worry about this, know I’m going to be okay. We’ll get through this as a family,” she said.
“Okay.” I didn’t know what else to say. “Mom, I love you.” An ache ghosted across my heart.
“Love you too, honey. Go out and win this weekend. I’ll be watching.”
“Sure thing, Mom. Talk to you later, and let me know when you get home.” I snuck a peek at Rowan. I should get Ace and Myles into the room after this call. But Rowan had been right there beside me. “Bye, Mom.”
“Bye, honey.” She ended the call.
Slumping my shoulders, I dropped my phone onto my lap and twisted it in my hand. I had to talk to someone, and Rowan was here .
“What happened? Is your mom okay? I could hear some of it.” He shifted on the bed to face me, lifting his leg between us.
“My mom’s been having these spells where she gets really tired for a few days or her hands tingle or sometimes she falls or?—”
“MS.” He placed his hand on mine, stopping the spinning of my phone. “Your mom has multiple sclerosis.”
“Oh, you heard that.” With a nod, I stared at our hands. I wanted to turn mine over and full-on hold his hand. Hell, I wanted him to wrap his arm around me again.
“No, but I went through it, go through it, with my mom.” He squeezed my hand and stood. “Come here.” He held his arms out.
Shifting my stare to his gorgeous face, I rose and fell into his chest, draping my arms around his waist and resting my head on his shoulder. His mom has MS?
Wrapping me in a warm embrace, he said, “My mom was diagnosed about ten years ago, and it was caught pretty early. But that’s because she has a really shitty version of it. She lost her sight once for a whole month, and sometimes, she’s in a wheelchair.”
My gut knotted and my throat tightened. In a croak, I said, “God, I’m sorry.” Was that the sort of thing my mom was in for? My breath hitched and the corners of my eyes pricked. I was going to lose it. “Shit.”
“Tyler, hey.” He freed me and grabbed my cheeks, forcing my blurry gaze to his. “The variant my mom has is rare. Most MS isn’t that bad. It progresses over the years, but they have good drugs to treat the flare-ups.”
Flare-ups , he’d used the same phrase my mom had. As I fought to control my stuttered breathing, I said, “But she’s had this for a long time and is only now getting treated.” Fucking doctor. Why hadn’t he listened to her all those years ago?
“Listen, the majority of MS cases are relapsing-remitting. Which means she’ll have flare-ups and will need medications for that, then they’ll go away, and she’ll be back to normal.” He placed his forehead on mine. “It’s not a death sentence. She’ll live a long, full life.”
I blinked and a hot tear tumbled down my cheek. “Yeah? You sure?”
His gaze darted between my eyes. “I’m sure.” He brushed his thumb over my cheek, wiping away the wetness. “Tyler, I’m here for you, man. Tell me what you need from me.”
I focused on his lips and bit the side of my own. His mouth was right there. If I leaned in…I blinked and twisted. Shit, I had to control myself.
“Tyler.” He snatched my hand and climbed onto my bed, shoving my bag away and pulling me with him. “You look so sad.” Lying on his back, he patted his chest. “Come on.”
I crept to his side and lay down, resting my head on his chest while he hooked his arms around me. I wasn’t going to think about how weird this might look, us lying on a bed together and cuddling.
“When I found out, I was pretty traumatized too. I knew nothing about the disease, and I was scared as hell I was going to slowly watch my mother rot away in a hospital bed.” He brushed his fingers over my scalp.
Closing my eyes, I lost myself in his body heat, the tingle of his fingers in my hair, the calming hold of his strong arms. “Yeah, I’m numb and traumatized at the same time right now.” How would I feel about this tomorrow? It was like a bad dream. How the hell was I going to play in our games?
“The thing to remember right now is she’s been diagnosed and is being treated. She’s going to feel a hell of a lot better when she gets home.” He breathed in deeply. “She’s a hockey mom. Is she the type of person who’s always running around and taking care of everyone?”
I nodded against his chest, a warm ache pushing through my heart. “Yeah, she keeps us all sane. God, when we were kids, she never rested. She was at every game. She sacrificed so much for us.” My eyes stung, and I held my breath. Don’t fucking lose it again .
“So now you’re playing for her.” He squeezed me for a beat. “You know what makes her the happiest is seeing you and your brother out there on the ice winning games.”
“Yeah, shit.” I sniffled and wiped tears from my eyes. “Is that what motivates you?”
“It is. Part of it.” He glanced at me. “The other part is I love the sport.” He bit his lower lip and then released it. “Tyler, when you go home, make sure she doesn’t overdo it. She’s got to be careful now and rest when she needs to. My dad and brothers understand that and help my mom a lot.”
Wait, he moved out here knowing his mom was sick? “Hey.” I lifted onto my elbow, my gaze meeting his and my hand flattening on his stomach. “Why did you move out here if your mom needed you?”
His arms dropped from around me and he planted the heel of his hand on his forehead, his gaze shifting toward the ceiling. “This might sound shitty, but I couldn’t keep my head in the game with her illness staring me in the face every day. I wasn’t playing my best.” His gaze flicked to mine. “Like I said, she’s got my dad and brothers there to help with the day-to-day. She didn’t need me there too. And I didn’t want all the years of practices and games she took me to ending with me not getting an NHL contract. I had to leave to focus on my career.”
I studied him. He was serious about this. “So you left Boston because you were having a hard time with your game there?”
“Yeah. And Coach Hammett is a good friend of Boston’s offensive line coach. There were some behind-the-scenes talks.” He shrugged. “You know how this sport works.” He pursed his lips. “My old coaches knew what was going on. They wanted to see me succeed.”
Nodding, I looked him over as if seeing him for the first time. There was so much more to him than the fluffy head of hair and adorable freckles. My gaze caught on my hand, resting on his abs, and then my body pressed into his side. Heat prickled over my skin and shivered up my spine. I was practically on top of him. Could be if I moved just a little bit. And we were in bed together. “Um…” My cock woke and swelled. Rolling to my back, I threw my legs over the side of the bed and stood. “Hey, so we have shit to do and, uh…” I combed my bangs off my forehead.
“Oh, yeah, you’re right.” He shimmied to the end of the bed, rose, and placed a hand on my shoulder. “Hey, are you all right? I mean really.”
“Yes, I’m okay. I’m over the initial shock.” I planted my hands on my hips, my gaze dashing from his bed to mine. What just happened? How had I ended up in bed with him?
“Tyler, what’s going on in your head?” He turned me to face him. “Talk to me.”
Bracing myself, I forced my gaze to his and butterflies took flight in my stomach. “I’m just processing it all.” And I wasn’t falling for Rowan. Just because he was there for me did not mean we were anything more than friends. But did straight guys comfort each other like we just had? “Thanks for being here.” I gave him a brief hug. “It means a lot to me.”
He rolled his lips, his gaze dragging over the dingy hotel carpet. “Anytime. I want to be there for you.” His gaze snapped to mine. “I’m okay with…you know.” He ticked his head at the bed. “If you’re sad or need to talk, I’m here.”
“Thank you.” My gaze lingered on the pout of his lips. But if we’d stayed on the bed any longer, I might have made a huge mistake. And right now, I was confused as fuck on top of trying to process my mom’s new diagnosis.
He clapped his hands. “Okay, nap then.” He bent to throw his bag off his bed and moved his suit onto a corner of it.
My gaze was glued to his round ass, only covered by thin sweats, my cock lengthening in an instant. Oh fucking hell. Didn’t want him to see my semi. Clenching my jaw, I worked my suit out of my bag, held it in front of me, and strode to the closet to hang it up. After, I ducked into the bathroom. As I shut the door and flicked on the light, my gaze landed on the mirror. Why was all this happening at once?
With a long exhale, I hung my head and covered my face with my palms. It was almost too much. How the hell was I going to keep my head in the game tonight? I’d have Ace and Myles out there with me. And I’d have Rowan by my side. I had to keep my feelings in check.
After a moment, I took a piss and washed my hands.
A knock sounded on the door. “Hey, you all right in there?”
“I’m good.” I popped the door open and forced a smile. There. I’d at least look like I was okay.
He eyed me. “Cool.” Holding up his toothbrush and toothpaste, he said, “Can I come in?”
“Yeah, sure.” I stepped aside and out into the room. We’d get ready for a good nap and act like everything was normal between us. Not like he’d been cuddling me on my bed after I’d lost it.
An hour before we had to leave for our game, I was walking through the hotel with Ace and Myles. I hadn’t told them about my mom yet and wasn’t sure when I would. After thinking about it, if I stank tonight, I didn’t want anyone blaming it on Mom’s illness. I didn’t know why, but in my head, it would be like blaming her for telling me and would only make things worse. I glanced out the glass doors of the hotel into the front courtyard and the park across the street. All the leaves were yellow, red, and orange. I missed the changing of the leaves in Chicago. But the winters could go fuck themselves. I smirked.
“You don’t seem like yourself. What’s up?” Myles grabbed my hand and stopped in the middle of the lobby.
“What do you mean?” I faced him. Of course, Myles could tell. He knew me better than anyone .
“You’ve been quiet.” He arched a brow. “Something didn’t happen between you and Mackenzie, did it?”
With an open-mouthed smirk, Ace came in close. “Did it?”
I scoffed and tore my hand free, turning around and rubbing my neck. “No, it didn’t.” Or did it?
“Then why can’t you look at us? He’s not around.” Ace grabbed my arm and twisted me to face them again. “Tyler, what the hell?”
“Nothing happened.” I opened my mouth, and my phone buzzed in my pocket. Was it Mom? “Shit.” I ripped it out and fumbled with it, almost dropping it.
The screen lit up with Dean Wilson. “It’s my agent. Hold on.” I held up a finger to them, and they both turned and looked at each other. I started the call and strolled toward the glass doors. “Hey, Dean. What’s up?” I shared Dean with my brother. My dad had set us up when we were in juniors.
“I’ve got a scout coming to see you tonight.” He huffed a laugh. “You’ll never guess who with.”
“Uh, the Coyotes?” That would be uncanny to be playing with Mason and Archer again. I gazed at the fluffy clouds throwing long shadows over the colorful fall leaves in the early evening light.
“Nope. Blackhawks. What do you think about that?”
“Really?” My favorite team? Dad would shit himself. My chest stung. My home base would be with Mom and Dad. “I love it.”
“I thought you would. I’ve already talked to the coaches, and he’s coming to your hotel for a meet and greet in about a half hour. Go put a suit on and look professional.” He chuckled. “Be the star player I know you are tonight, and we’ll see what happens.”
“Fantastic. Thanks so much.” My pulse raced along with my thoughts. Now I had even more pressure on me tonight.
“Okay then, talk to you soon. I’ve got paperwork to look over. ”
“Sure, talk to you soon.” I ended the call and swiveled to stare at Myles and Ace, who were watching me.
“So?” Myles jogged to me. “What happened?”
“I’m meeting with a Blackhawks scout in thirty minutes.” My mouth went dry, and I gaped. I had to clear my head somehow.
Ace ran to me, picked me up, and spun me around. “Good job, Hodge. You got this.” He dropped me and laughed.
Rowan walked in from the direction of the elevators, stopped, and furrowed his brows at us. “Hey, what’s going on?” He stepped to me, looking me up and down. “Everything all right?”
Ace gave his shoulder a quick slap. “He’s great. He’s meeting with a Blackhawks scout pretty soon.”
With his eyes growing wide, Rowan said, “Oh shit, congrats, man.” He wrapped me in a warm hug. “I’m proud of you.” He freed me.
“Thanks.” My head spun. I had to get out of here and pull my head together. “I’m going to shower and change.” Glancing at Myles and Ace, I walked away from them all.
Half an hour later, I sat in my blue suit in a small hotel conference room with Coach Hammett sitting across from me at a long wooden table. He said, “You earned this, Hodge.”
“Thank you.” I swallowed thickly and poured water into a plastic glass from a pitcher that had been set up before we’d gotten in here. I sipped my water, willing my nerves and stomach to settle.
Coach Henderson and another man with graying temples and thick black glasses entered the room.
I stood and held out my hand. “Hello. I’m Tyler Hodge.”
The man stopped, tucked his laptop under his arm, and smiled at me. “My pleasure. I’m Brian Tucker.” He shook my hand and dropped into a seat next to Coach Hammett while Coach Henderson took a chair next to mine.
“Let’s get started, shall we?” Mr. Tucker opened his laptop and hit some keys. “We’re looking for a good defenseman to work with Matt Gaines, and we think you’ve got the right stuff.” He glanced at his screen and flicked his gaze to mine. “I take it you know who he is.”
Matt Gaines? He was the big up-and-coming player from the rookies they took in last season. The guy was explosive on the ice. “Yes, sir. I’m a big Blackhawks fan. I watch all the games.” I rocked once.
“Good. We’re looking for someone who can match his pace and intensity, and after reviewing your game footage, well, you’ve got it.” He locked his gaze on me. “Your coaches tell me you’re levelheaded and professional. I’m sure your father instilled that in you.”
“He did, sir.” I nodded. This would mean leaving everyone here behind. But I always knew that would be the case. I’d prepared for this my whole life.
He shut his laptop and leaned back, eyeing me. “So, what questions do you have for me?”
“Uh…” My thoughts jumbled through my brain. With everything going on, I could barely focus. I knew what the steps were in getting on an NHL team. I’d seen my brother go through it, and Dad could recite it all to me. But… “If you like what you see here today, would I be traveling to Chicago anytime soon?” Then, at least, I could see Mom.
“It would be the next step.” He nodded once. “I know your family is there, so if you want, we could give you some time with them too.”
“Thank you, sir.” I sank my teeth into my lower lip and sweat dampened the back of my neck. All I wanted was out of here. “I think that’s all, sir.”
“Okay. Play well out there tonight, and we’ll be in touch.” With a quick grin, he stood and stretched out a hand. “It was a pleasure.”
After standing, I shook his hand and glanced at my coaches, watching me. Obviously, they all had more to discuss. “Thanks again.” I released him and left the room.
After getting back to my hotel room, I shut the door.
“How’d it go?” Rowan’s voice filled the small space.
I spun around. Of course, he was in here resting before the game. “Uh, good.” I stepped to my bag at the foot of my bed and rummaged through it for my sweats.
“You seem flustered.” He sat up straight from his headboard, climbed off the bed, and then crouched next to me. “You okay?” He rested his warm hand on my back, his face close to mine.
“Yeah, I’m just, uh…” Where the hell were my team sweats? I fumbled through my clothing. The meeting had only taken fifteen minutes, so I had a good forty-five minutes until I had to put this suit back on, but damn if I wasn’t going to be comfortable for a little while longer.
“Here.” He reached in and pulled out my sweatpants. “Looking for these?” With a soft grin, he held them up to me.
“Thanks.” I snatched them from him and made my way into the bathroom to undress. It felt weird to undress in front of him in the hotel room. Would he notice? After sliding on my sweatpants and folding my clothing, I strolled into the room.
He sat on the edge of his bed, his elbows on his thighs and his hands clasped. “Feel better now?”
“I do.” I hung my clothes over the chair. Didn’t need to show up to the game all rumpled. “What’ve you been doing?” It was a little weird having so much time in another town before our game, but that’s what our schedule had called for this week.
“I watched some game footage and got some studying done.” He ran his tongue along his lower lip. “You’re under a wicked amount of pressure tonight, huh.”
Halting at the chair, my gaze swept to his. “I am.” I rubbed the heel of my hand across the tightness in my chest. Had he said anything to Ace and Myles yet? “Hey, I haven’t told Ace or Myles about my mom yet. Have you?—”
“No, of course not. It’s not my story to tell.” With his brows furrowing, he leaned back on straight arms. “You don’t think it will help to talk to your best friends about what’s going on?”
I fell onto my bed, mirroring him. “Not right now. I don’t want them worrying about me because of what’s happening and playing differently.” With a ragged huff, I pointed at him and said, “Don’t you dare play any differently.”
“Like how?” A smirk played over his lips. “I’m still going to let you do you. I’m not going to bogart the puck at the net.”
With a nod, I stared at my bare feet. “Okay.” How had I thought he’d react?
“It’s just another game, Hodge. Put that in your head, and you’ll do fine.” He stood and dropped next to me. “You’re so wound up. Fuckin’ A, man.” Climbing up behind me, he straddled my hips and massaged the tense muscles at the base of my neck.
Shivers rolled over my back and my shoulders relaxed. “Oh fuck, that feels good.” I dipped my head forward. Goddamn, he had some good hands.
“Don’t worry. I’ll have your back out there.” He kneaded a knot between my shoulder blades and his lips brushed the shell of my ear. “Get yourself focused and forget all the bullshit. It’s just another game.”
Goosebumps broke out on my neck and spine and my cock took notice. How the hell were we on a bed together again? “Thank you, Rowan.” I dragged myself away from him, rose, and faced him. “Now, get off my bed. You’ve got your own.” Giving him a playful smile, my gaze fell to his groin and my eyes popped open. A clear bulge stretched to his waistband. Holy hell, did he have a boner?
“Yes, sir.” Covering his groin with one hand, he saluted me with the other and moved to his own bed. “Hanging out before a game are the best, aren’t they?” He lay down on his side with his back to me.
Had I seen that right? Maybe his dick was just in a weird position. Pointing straight up to his hip bone? I crept onto my bed and lay down as my cock swelled. If it was that big flaccid, how big would it be— Ty, he had a fucking boner. I rested on my side with my back to him, tucking a hand under my pillow and the other between my thighs. Jesus Christ, I had a lot of distractions for the game.