Chapter 18
18
Bailey
T he second Carter entered the kitchen the following morning, Bailey’s body reacted. Her pulse roared and a shiver racked her body. The house was at its usual cool temperature in the morning, but she knew that had nothing to do with the goosebumps on her arms.
Outside, it was still dark, and soon Anya would be getting up for school. They only had a few minutes before her daughter came into the room.
Carter’s eyes locked onto hers and the corners of his mouth twitched into a smile. “Morning,” he nodded.
Her eyes followed him until he came to stand beside her. He opened the cupboard and retrieved a mug for his coffee. Her heart danced in the small space it was allowed while she held her cup with both hands to her lips.
His voice remained low as he spoke, though neither one of them looked at the other. “You look beautiful this morning.”
“You too.” She grimaced and a blush that you could probably see from a mile away made its way to her cheeks. That was so stupid. Bailey coughed on her drink, then chanced a quick look before she attempted to cover her embarrassment. “I mean, you look nice.”
He chuckled. Bailey had only heard that sound a handful of times, and usually it was filled with disdain. This chuckle was warmer, sweeter, smoother… and it twisted her stomach into a thousand knots.
She placed a hand on the counter at her side and he did the same, his finger grazing hers as he took a sip of the coffee he’d just poured from the pot. Tension crackled like lightning itself. This was more than a simple fling; she could feel that in the way he looked at her. It was easier to see the attraction he had for her now that she knew where he stood.
It had been so long since she’d been happy—no, not happy—safe. She felt safe with this man. That was what this feeling was. She couldn’t explain it. He had issues like the ones that Jack had struggled with, and yet he seemed to be overcoming them. She wasn’t so na?ve as to believe he wouldn’t regress; addicts were prone to it. But there was something about him that made her want to believe this was real.
Carter cocked his head, his voice just above a whisper. “Did you sleep well?”
She shook her head. There was no sleeping after the moment they’d shared last night. All she could think about was Carter and that he was in the other room. She’d wondered if he was thinking about her and how the next few days would go. Her throat closed up and she looked away, feeling the blush return. “I didn’t sleep well at all.”
He hummed an acknowledging sound in the back of his throat. “Me neither.”
Her eyes flicked to meet his, watching, waiting for him to admit what it was that kept him up. But before he could confirm her suspicions, Anya barreled into the room.
“Can I have some cereal for breakfast?”
Bailey broke away from Carter, putting a decided two feet between them. She took another sip of her coffee to cover the strangled surprise that was probably written all over her face. “Of course, sweetie. Coming right up.” She shot one more look in Carter’s direction, noting the amusement that played across his features.
“Carter? Do you want cereal, too?” Anya asked. “You can sit by me.”
Bailey glanced toward him over her shoulder, not surprised to see him engage with her daughter in the way he was prone to do. He flashed Anya that boyish grin and gestured toward the table, flinging one look toward Bailey before he pulled out a chair. “I can’t think of anything better.”
By the way Anya beamed up at him, Bailey knew it was far too late for her not to get attached. She already adored the man. Thankfully, she had no ideas—or rather, she hadn’t mentioned any—regarding the two of them being more than just friends.
Bailey prepared the bowls of cereal and placed one in front of Anya, but Carter took his straight from her grasp, allowing his fingers to graze hers. Sparks of awareness rocketed through her body, and she nearly dropped the bowl before he had a good hold on it. The only indication that he knew exactly what he was doing was in the smirk that graced his lips.
Her own smile tugged at her lips as she settled back in her chair and listened to Anya prattle on about what interested her to her captive audience. Several times, Bailey caught Carter staring at her. And with each moment, she could feel her heart growing even more attached.
During a lull in the conversation, Carter turned to Bailey. “I won’t be available today for the toy drive. But I’ll be home for dinner.”
The way he spoke to her made this all hit a little harder. One night. That was all it took to shift the awkward roommate agreement into something even more awkward but, at the same time, very real. It would be too easy to slip up and kiss him goodbye in front of her daughter or to say something that would tip off anyone nearby. She needed to be careful.
In the most nonchalant way possible, she nodded. “Thanks for letting me know.” One glance in her daughter’s direction confirmed that Anya didn’t seem to notice any difference between the two adults at the table. She swallowed her last bite and pushed away from the table.
“I need to get dressed,” Anya said before dashing off to the bedroom.
The second they were alone, Carter leaned across the table and whispered, “This is going to be harder than I thought.”
She frowned. “What do you mean?”
There was something almost carnal in the way he looked at her, causing her heart to explode, and his words didn’t help at all in the matter. “After kissing you last night, that’s all I can think about.”
Her eyes grew wide, and she spun her head around to ensure Anya hadn’t overheard. “You can’t talk like that when she’s here,” she hissed.
Carter arched a flirtatious brow. “Then I’ll look forward to the time after she’s been tucked in.” He rose from his place at the table and gave her a look so full of desire that it practically scorched her from the inside out.
The next few days were similar to that one. They tiptoed around Anya, making sure she didn’t notice any change. While the world outside continued to appear even more Christmasy, Bailey’s home remained empty. She’d been researching different ways to celebrate Christmas without a tree and found a cute idea online. If she could get some green butcher paper, she could cut out the shape of a tree and they could hang it on the wall.
It was one of the many cost-saving options she could think of. Unfortunately, it wasn’t going to happen today.
“It’s my concert day!” Anya shouted the second she burst into the house. Her hands sprung up in the air and she let out a whoop. “Are you excited, Mom?” Anya glanced around the house. “Where’s Carter?”
Bailey got up from her seat at the table and shut her laptop. “Carter has to work a little longer today, but he said he’d be here in time to come to the concert.”
There was some uncertainty in Anya’s eyes.
“Don’t worry, sweetheart. I’m sure he’ll be here right on time.”
“Kyle said his dad isn’t coming to the concert because he’s working. And Sue’s mom says they don’t have a car, so Sue can’t even come.” The worry on Anya’s face was etched so deeply that Bailey’s heart nearly couldn’t take it.
“Well, Carter made sure my car is working okay. The tires are all fixed now. So even if he can’t come, you and I will be able to make it.”
Anya frowned but didn’t argue. They spent the next hour picking out the perfect dress for the concert, followed by the perfect hairstyle. The closer it got to the time when they needed to leave, Bailey started getting nervous herself. She frowned as she looked at the clock for what felt like the hundredth time. When they couldn’t wait any longer, she had to push aside her own feelings of doubt to be strong for her daughter. “I’ll send him a message, okay? He knows where your school is, and I’ll save him a seat.”
She was crouched down in front of Anya right by the front door. The disappointment on her daughter’s face was palpable. This concert had been one of the most important things Anya had been excited about, and if Carter didn’t follow through with his promise?—
The door beside them burst open, and Bailey was barely able to get out of the way before Carter ducked inside. He glanced down at Anya with wide, worried eyes. “Good. You’re still here.”
Anya grinned. “I knew you would make it.”
Bailey rolled her eyes. But then Carter crouched down in front of Anya and withdrew a small bouquet of daisies from behind his back. Bailey couldn’t tell who gasped louder, herself or her daughter.
Anya gave her mother a surprised and elated look. “Flowers?” she asked.
He nodded, his gaze landing on Bailey briefly. “Flowers for the best little singer there is.”
Anya threw her hands around his neck and gave him a hug. He rocked back on his heels with a chuckle before carefully extricating himself from her.
“Okay, bug. Let’s get you out of here and to that concert.”
Bug ? Bailey gaped at him. Now he had a nickname for her.
The heart in her chest practically burst. He’d managed to win over her daughter, showing her a love she hadn’t even received from her own father. And now he was set on making Bailey fall in love with him. There was no use denying it. She was already in too deep. If this didn’t work out, then there would be not one but two devastated hearts.
Carter rose and his eyes locked with Bailey’s. He didn’t have to say a single word and she melted. They stared for a moment too long, and Anya’s voice broke them up.
“Come on. We’re going to be late.”
Bailey jumped, then placed her hand on her daughter’s back. “Let’s go.”
Once they were back home and Anya had been bathed and dressed in her pajamas, it was time for bed. Anticipation continued to mount as Bailey looked forward to the quiet moments that she’d be able to spend with Carter before they went off to their separate bedrooms.
“Not you,” Anya’s voice broke into her thoughts, and she glanced down at her daughter with confusion.
“Hmm?”
“I don’t want you to tuck me in. I want Carter.”
Bailey blinked. Carter was in the kitchen at the time, so he didn’t get to hear this particular request. Bailey looked toward the door and then nodded. “I’ll go ask him.” She wandered through the living room, then into the kitchen.
Carter’s back was to her as he set to work washing dishes. He stilled as she got closer, then looked toward her. “All tucked in?”
Bailey folded her arms, leaning against the refrigerator. “She wants you.”
His brows lifted. “She wants me…”
“To tuck her in.”
Doubt crossed his features. “Are you sure?”
“You better get in there before she comes out to look for you.”
He moved to reach for her, then thought better of it. “I’ll be right back,” he murmured. In no time, the sound of the door latching could be heard, and he reappeared, hovering near the hallway. “Are you okay?” he murmured when he finally moved toward her.
Bailey thought long and hard about that question. She couldn’t have asked for a better man to come into her life, and the fact that her daughter liked him so much made her decision so much easier. “I think it’s wonderful.”
Undeniable relief flooded his expression, and he closed the distance between them. He pulled her face closer and brushed a kiss to her lips, lingering longer than was smart. Then he withdrew and gazed into her eyes. “I’m not going to hurt you—either of you.”
She stilled. His words brought more comfort than she could have ever asked for. She hadn’t even realized she needed him to confirm such a thing. When there were so many uncertainties up in the air regarding her life, at least she knew she didn’t have to worry about Carter. “I don’t know what I did to be lucky enough to have you in my life.” She uttered the words, no longer worrying about how it would affect him.
His smile warmed her even more.
A few moments later, they were settled on the couch in front of the fireplace like they’d been that first night. Carter’s eyes were closed for the moment, giving her an opportunity to study him. The bruising on his face had long since faded. The cut she’d caused on his forehead had healed but would likely leave a scar. Her thoughts wandered to the biggest problems she was currently facing. When he finally moved back home, she wouldn’t have his help with groceries. She needed to solve her income problems. He opened his eyes, and she stilled.
He watched her for a few seconds, then reached for her and took her hand in his. “What are you thinking?”
Bailey didn’t want to be honest about that. Everything always came back to money. All her concerns related to providing for her daughter. He had to be getting tired of it.
“Bailey,” he whispered, “what’s the matter?”
She sighed. It wasn’t like he didn’t know already that she was struggling. “I’m worried about how next year will look.”
His brows pulled together.
“My job,” she clarified. “I don’t think I’m going to be able to continue being a realtor.”
“Why not? You sold that house to Emma. Doesn’t seem like you’re struggling to find clients.”
Inwardly, she grimaced. The house he spoke of was her own. It was the home she’d inherited—and the one she couldn’t even keep her hands on. She couldn’t bring herself to tell him the embarrassing story of her late husband putting them into debt so badly that she had to sell it in the first place. She looked away. “It’s harder than you think.”
Thankfully, he didn’t push her on the matter. “Well, what would you do instead?”
That brought her focus back to him. “What?”
He twisted into a seated position and pulled her against his frame. “If you don’t think you can be a realtor and provide for Anya, what would you do if you could pick any career?”
“Any career?”
“Any career,” he confirmed.
She already knew the answer to that question. “It’s silly.”
“I doubt that,” he murmured, his low voice right beside her ear. “Tell me.”
A delicious shiver raced beneath her skin. It didn’t matter how many times he spoke like that; it affected her the same every time. She rubbed her arm up and down, then glanced up at him out of the corner of her eye. “When Jack would come home all beat up, I learned real fast how to fix him up—despite the fact that I hated him getting in barfights, I found I loved caring for his injuries.” She flushed deeply. “I would be a nurse.”
“Then do that,” he insisted.
“It’s not that easy.” She laughed. “I’d have to go to school.”
“So go to school.” He said it as if it was that simple.
Bailey pulled back and gave him a look. “Do you even hear yourself? I can’t just go to school. The cost alone makes it impossible. And Anya needs me to be home when she gets off the bus. There’s just no way it would work.” She could feel her defenses rising along with her disappointment. “I’m just going to have to ask Shane if he has something more permanent for me—or at the very least, if he can give me additional hours.”
The expression on his face made it clear that he wanted to say something—to solve her problem with some advice. Right now, she didn’t need his opinions. The truth was that she had already gone through the logistics of it. Nursing school simply wasn’t within her reach.
To prevent him from giving advice where it wasn’t welcome, she reached for his hand and laced her fingers through his. “What about you?”
“What about me?” he asked.
“If you hadn’t been raised to be a cowboy, what would you have wanted to be?”
“You make it sound like I didn’t have a choice.”
She stiffened until he chuckled. She didn’t know if he was teasing her or if his amusement came from thinking she might have a good point. She scooted into the crook of his arm, breathing easier now.
Carter rested his chin on her head. “An astronaut.” Two words. So simple. And yet they felt incredibly heavy. It was loaded with so much—a boy who felt trapped in the life he’d been saddled with and who only wanted his freedom to do something bigger and better than himself.
Bailey twisted and grinned up at him. “I think you would have been an amazing astronaut.”