Chapter 19
19
Carter
S even piles. Ten notes in each pile. All were one-hundred-dollar bills. He had a little over seven grand out of the ten grand he needed. The money was due in less than two weeks. Following the conversation Carter had with Bailey, he’d looked into the local nursing programs. There was one through a community college that cost a total of eight thousand dollars. Granted, that was only for tuition. Bailey would have to get her own textbooks, but that seemed so much more manageable.
He frowned at the piles of money on his bed, his heart aching. The more he stared at it, the more he wanted to give it to Bailey. Unfortunately, Dirk wouldn’t pat him on his back for a good deed. One way or another, Carter would have to pay up.
Carter moved away from the bed and leaned against the wall, still staring at the money. He hadn’t stolen any more money from his brothers. He’d worked more hours lately so he could earn more to add to his stash. He needed to be the kind of man Bailey thought him to be—and that meant honesty in all his actions.
He blew out a sigh and leaned his head against the wall, closing his eyes against the decisions he needed to make. It would be the perfect Christmas gift. It would solve her problems for the future and also help her care for Anya.
Maybe he could ask Wade for a raise. He’d been doing better at his job. Wade had to have noticed that. If he wasn’t willing to give Carter a raise, then maybe he’d be willing to give him an advance.
Carter shook his head and sighed again. Wade wouldn’t give him an advance for ten grand. That idea wouldn’t work. Carter needed to figure out something else when it came to Bailey and her needs. It wasn’t like Bailey would want to accept his money anyway.
He could hear Bailey and her daughter wandering through the house. They were back from their outing. Anya sounded ecstatic about something, but what else was new. It was hard to get that kid down.
His heart swelled as he thought about what he had planned for both Bailey and her daughter tonight. The two of them were going to be surprised for very different reasons—and Anya would likely be the most excited.
Carter scooped up the money and put it back in the zippered bag before shoving it under his mattress. He had just over two weeks to make his decision on what he could do with the money. There were pros and cons to both options. Right now, he needed to let the girls know of his plans.
In the kitchen, Anya jumped up and down. “It’s gonna be a really cool party. Shane said all his workers are invited. That’s you, right, Mom?”
Bailey chuckled as she flipped through the envelopes in her hands. “Yes, that’s me.”
“He said Santa would be there.”
Carter waited near the hallway, watching as Bailey slowed her movements and glanced down at her daughter. “Oh?”
Anya nodded vehemently. “Yeah. And he said one of Santa’s reindeers will be there that we get to pet. And there’s going to be music and food. Are you going to invite Carter?”
He stilled, tempted to retreat into the shadows so he wouldn’t be seen. Bailey’s expression was one of curiosity if anything. They had been so careful not to let Anya know that they were anything more than friends. In fact, tonight he’d planned on taking her on a date but spinning it in a way that Anya wouldn’t suspect.
Then Bailey’s eyes darted across the room to where he stood.
Rats. So much for his anonymity.
Bailey didn’t alert Anya to the fact that Carter was listening. Instead, she crouched down so that she was at eye level with her daughter. Her brows scrunched, and she took Anya’s hands into her own. “Why do you think I should take Carter?”
Anya shrugged. “Because you like him.”
A small smile dragged across Bailey’s face. “I do like him.”
“So, are you going to bring him?”
Bailey’s eyes darted toward Carter once more, then returned to Anya. “Usually, those parties are for families.”
“But Carter could be part of our family, right? He lives here.”
Carter’s breath caught. He couldn’t remember a time when his chest felt this tight. The kid was too perceptive for her own good. She couldn’t have possibly caught on so easily, could she? This had to be more innocent than it appeared to be.
“Sweetie…” Bailey started. “What you’re suggesting sounds an awful lot like you want Carter to be here permanently.”
“Yeah. So?”
She laughed, but the sound was more strained than it should have been.
“You like him,” Anya repeated. “And he likes you. I can tell.”
Bailey’s eyes shifted to Carter and stayed there as Anya continued.
“And I think you should marry him.”
The blood in Carter’s veins suddenly ran cold. Their relationship was too new. He had too much to deal with right now. What would happen with Dirk if he didn’t pay the man?
All those concerns faded away when he heard Bailey’s quiet comment.
“Maybe I will… one day.”
Flying.
Falling.
A lack of gravity.
That was the only way Carter could describe how he felt in that moment. If Bailey wasn’t worried about letting him in, then maybe he had more of a chance than he was giving himself. She could see them together, and right now that was all that mattered.
“I think he’d like that,” Anya confirmed.
Carter chose that moment to intrude. He clapped his hands together. “There you are!”
Anya spun around, eyes just as bright as ever. “Carter! Guess what. On Christmas Eve, there’s going to be a party at where my mom works. Santa’s coming! And his reindeer!”
His eyes flicked to Bailey while her daughter erupted with the information she could barely contain. The woman he was quickly falling for—no, the woman he had fallen for—was smiling at him. Those eyes seemed to be capable of seeing right through him to his soul—and she still wanted to be with him.
Carter dropped down to one knee. “That sounds like some party.”
“And Mom’s gonna have you come with us.”
He glanced at Bailey for just a moment. “Is that so?”
Anya nodded again. “Because you’re part of our family.”
Carter couldn’t be sure, but it almost looked as though Bailey was both embarrassed and happy that he was getting all this information from her daughter. He chuckled. “I don’t think I could ask for anyone better to be part of my family than you.”
Anya beamed.
“And I’ve got a surprise for you.”
Her already wide eyes grew even more. “You do? Is it a tree?”
He chuckled even as Bailey made a face. “Nope. I’m going to spend some time with your mother tonight, and I got you the best babysitter.” He glanced toward Bailey, checking to see if she was okay with his surprise. All he read on her face was shock. “How would you like Emma Hart to come hang out with you tonight?”
The shock on Anya’s face mirrored her mother’s. “Emma? Mom said we couldn’t bother her. She just bought our house.”
Carter shrugged. “I’ve got a few connections. She said she couldn’t wait to spend some time with you. What do you say?”
Anya squealed.
Carter draped a heavy blanket around Bailey’s shoulders. She tugged the ends tighter around her body, and her eyes followed him as he moved to sit beside her. The campfire he’d put together crackled and popped, its sparks floating through the air. The cold winter air bit at their skin, but the sky overhead made it easy to forget the cold.
Specks of light, both big and small, dotted the blue-black space above them. Sometimes it looked like swirls of glitter had been painted by Van Gogh himself. Carter glanced over at Bailey to see her face turned upward, her lips parted slightly. Shadows danced across her face from the flickering firelight, but she couldn’t have been more beautiful than she was in that moment.
It brought him so much joy to see someone he cared about appreciating the stars just like he had for so many years. She dropped her chin and turned her face toward him. “It’s beautiful,” she whispered.
Carter slipped his arm around her shoulders. He’d wanted to share something with her that no one could take away from her—something that money couldn’t buy. Of course he didn’t want to point that out to her. The last thing he wanted was to make her feel uncomfortable. So, he broached a different subject.
“Where did you grow up?”
Bailey glanced at him and then toward the fire. “I was actually born in Denver. Then I moved around a lot. My grandparents were locals, though.”
“They were? I wonder if I knew them. Where did they live?”
She glanced at him briefly. “South side of town. Smaller piece of property only big enough for a couple horses and some farming.”
He cocked his head thinking about that part of town but couldn’t place anyone he might have known. “I’m guessing they’re not around anymore.”
Bailey shook her head. “They passed away just before Anya was born. They had my mother late in life, and my mother didn’t have me until she was nearing her forties. I think I surprised them all when I got pregnant at nineteen.” She rested her head on his shoulder and sighed. “They would have loved Anya.”
“I don’t think anyone could meet her and not like her,” he agreed.
Carter could feel her smile against him. They went quiet for a little while, each in their own thoughts. He had no idea what she might be thinking about, but he couldn’t get one thing out of his mind. Bailey had hopes for their future. She could see them getting married.
He could have a future like the ones his brothers had—and the more he thought about it, the more he wanted it.
All he needed to do was keep her safe and fix his issues with the bookie, then he could have it all.
“Carter?”
He shifted, suddenly realizing that she’d been asking him something. “Hmm?”
“Tell me more about yourself,” she murmured.
As much as he tried not to, he stiffened. “You already know all you need to.” He didn’t want her to know the darker reality of his life. She wouldn’t like him so much if she knew the trouble he was in.
She scoffed. “Hardly.” Bailey twisted around and gazed up at him. “Tell me about when you left home. You mentioned you lived in the city for a while.”
And just like that, his walls shot up. “You don’t want to know about that time of my life. I—made a lot of mistakes.” That was about as far as he could go without giving her too much, which would inevitably scare her off.
Bailey sighed. “Don’t do that.”
“Don’t do what?”
“Don’t shut me out. I’m sure I’ve dealt with worse.” She lifted her face toward him, her eyes searching his. “The man I married did plenty to destroy me, but I stayed.” It wasn’t the best comparison. Just the thought that she had stayed with a man who didn’t deserve her sent sparks of fury through his body.
There wasn’t going to be getting around this. She wouldn’t stop pushing, he could tell. What else could he do except give her a morsel of something to hold onto? “When I left my home, I was completely alone. Without their support, I fell in with the wrong people. I gambled and drank too much until I could forget that I’d abandoned my family.” Carter left out the extent of the gambling. The alcohol addiction confession was enough. She’d already assumed as much; he was sure of it. “But I’m trying to be a better person,” he croaked, his eyes closing briefly.
“I can tell,” she whispered. “And I think it’s admirable.”
Carter opened his eyes and stared down at her in wonder. No judgment. No chastisement.
Just… acceptance.