Chapter 27 Sam
sam
My warm bed sounded really good right now.
I didn’t know why I thought it was a great idea to come and help Forest in the wind and snow.
The day after Christmas was a cold wet one and I should have stayed home waiting for Jude, but I couldn’t bear to let Forest do this all alone, especially with the chance of a big storm coming through.
Ever since yesterday, Forest had seemed even more off or even more out of reach.
He had me doubting my Christmas gift, and I almost regretted the idea, but the look on Jude’s face comforted me.
I had seen the worry on Jude’s face and how much not labeling us had bothered him, even if he didn’t say so.
If I had my way and I wasn’t afraid of Forest running away, I would have told them I loved them already.
Unfortunately, I didn’t think Forest was ready to hear that.
I also didn’t think it was fair to tell only Jude that I loved him.
Forest was an enigma to me, he had always seemed confident and bossy.
He was a man who always knew what he wanted, but these last few weeks, I had seen a different man.
He was quiet, reserved and each day I was waiting for the moment he was going to tell us he was done.
Each time I pressed to see if he was ok, he clammed up and all I got were kisses and blow jobs.
Not that I was complaining, but he was running away from something. I just didn’t know what.
My phone buzzed in my jacket a few times in a row, and I wanted to ignore it because the incessant ringing had me worried about Jude. I opened my phone to see six missed calls from Myles. Shit. The deadline was in six days, could this be it. Was it time for him to tell me it was over?
Fuck, I couldn’t allow myself to get happy.
I dialed Myles back immediately.
“Jesus, answer your damn phone,” Myles barked.
“I’m calling you back,” I snapped.
“How do you feel about going to Canada?”
My heart stopped beating for a second.
“Where and how much?” I asked.
“Toronto and—” Miles went silent.
Fuck that was far…
“That bad?” I sighed.
“The contract is the rest of the year for five hundred with the possibility of renewing,” he said, a little too cheerfully.
I stayed quiet. It was significantly less and with no promise of the future.
“Have they spoken—”
“They are aware of your standing as well as you coaching the college team,” he said.
“How the hell did you know about that?”
“You made the highlights a few weeks ago and that’s how they gained interest,” he said, like he was proud.
“Oh shit, I didn’t even think about that,” I said. “I didn’t even know Monroe had a D1 hockey team.”
“Well, they want you and they want you to fly out immediately,” he said. “I can have the paperwork drawn up and—”
“They don’t even want to see me?”
“No, should they?” he asked, concerned.
“I assumed with my injury—”
“You really didn’t see the highlights did you?” he chuckled. “Someone filmed you with the team, Webber, you looked good.”
“They filmed me? Like practicing?” I don’t know why that didn’t sit well with me, but I hated it.
“Yeah, they liked what they saw, you looked good man,” he said.” I was worried about you, but you look good.”
I felt good. I didn’t know if it was working at the ranch or being at the rink, but I almost felt better than I had before.
I had scrimmaged with the guys a few times and I felt good, better than good.
I had been itching to get out on a team, even if that reality had been slowly disappearing, but shit, it was a real possibility, now.
“You ready to head back? I’m cold as hell.” Forest’s deep voice was like cold water on my system.
I nodded my head, pointing to my phone. He pointed to the barn and I nodded.
“Uh… ok, so, this is a sure thing?” I wondered what my life would look like with Forest and Jude.
Would we even survive me living far away?
“Seems like it, kid,” he said. “If you're peeved about the money, I can see if I can get you more.”
I was peeved about the money, but now that I had what I wanted right in front of me, I didn’t know if I wanted it.
“Do I have to give an answer now?”
“I would say you have a few days if I make it about the money,” he said. “What changed? I thought you would have jumped on this opportunity.”
“A lot has changed,” I said. “I missed hockey so much in the beginning, but now that I’ve had time to think, well, shit’s changed. Give me a few days if you can and you’ll have my answer. Thanks, Myles.”
I hung up before he could say anything else. Myles would try and convince me to take it, and I didn’t need to have my agent up my ass. Looking around for Forest, I took a deep breath before I went to him. If I was making this decision, I needed them.
“Honey, I’m home!” I yelled, coming into Jude’s house like it was my own, with Forest right on my tail.
The snow was falling harder, and I was glad Jude wasn’t out there having to work in it, and we were all finally home.
“In bed!” Jude yelled.
“Yes, but I need a shower first,” Forest said, taking off his boots and jacket.
“You hungry?” I asked.
“A little, but I can wait,” he said, walking down the hall as he took off pieces of clothing that made my mind wander, completely forgetting about food.
I followed Forest like the whipped boy I was, stripping so I could shower with him too. Even though I was bundled up, moving around made me sweat. And no matter what, I always smelled like the ranch, even if I was only there for a few hours, never even coming close to the cattle.
“Hey, Princess,” Forest said, going to give Jude a kiss on his forehead.
He was lying down, scrolling on his phone.
“Hey, I didn’t know you’d come back so early,” he said, sitting up a little more.
“Theo didn’t want us out in the snow, it’s supposed to get worse,” I said, foregoing his forehead and capturing his lips in a deep kiss.
Jude groaned, wrapping his hand behind my neck, pulling me forward.
“Baby, I’m dirty,” I said, against his lips.
“I’m horny so I’ll make you messy again,” he said, with a devious grin.
“I smell like the ranch,” I grimaced. “That’s not attractive.”
“Ok, fine, but hurry up,” he said, kissing me once more.
I chuckled, following Forest into the shower who was already a wet dream covered in suds.
He looked over his shoulder with a smirk and yeah, I was hard instantly.
Images of him fucking me against the glass while Jude heard us, didn’t help my hard-on.
Sex had to wait. I needed to have this discussion with them before anything else.
I needed to know what would happen with us.
So, I watched Forest take a leisurely shower and hopped in just as he was done.
“You teasing me, Peaches?” His gruff voice shot tingles down my spine.
“Never,” I smirked, switching places with him and leaning my head back under the warm spray of water.
“Don’t take too long,” he commanded, stepping out of the shower, giving me a fantastic view of him drying off.
“Now, who's teasing who?” I turned around to calm my libido and shower quickly.
I walked into the bedroom seeing Forest and Jude making out leisurely. Jude was straddling Forest, grinding on him slowly as I got on the bed.
“Finally! You took forever,” Jude said, reaching for me.
Forest kissed down his neck to his chest.
“Actually, I need to talk to you guys about something,” I said, suddenly feeling so nervous I didn’t know if I could say what I needed to.
“Sam.” Fingers snapped in front of me and I flinched.
“Are you ok?” Jude asked.
They were right in front of me and I wondered how long I had zoned out for.
“What’s going on?” Forest said, putting a hand on my shoulder.
“I got a call from my agent. Toronto wants to sign me,” I said softly, the words feeling like ash coming out of my mouth. “They saw videos of me with the Monroe Hockey team, and they are offering to sign me for the rest of the year with the possibility of re-signing.”
“Holy shit, Sam!” Jude smiled. “That’s great!”
His enthusiasm was what I had expected, and Forest's silence is what I had expected as well. I was afraid to look at him.
“That’s what you've been working towards,” Forest said, more subdued. “And you were worried for nothing.”
I looked over and he looked happy, but something felt off.
“Yeah, I didn’t think it was going to happen,” I said as Jude hugged my arm excited enough for all of us.
“How much?” Jude asked. “Please don’t tell me that they are going to lowball you.”
“They are lowballing me; they offered five hundred.” I grimaced when Forest's eyes widened.
“Five hundred?! Look, I know it’s in the middle of the season, but come on, at least give you seven fifty,” Jude said, getting mad for me and I could kiss him for it.
“We are talking about thousands, right?” Forest looked between us.
“Yeah, five hundred thousand,” I said, hoping this didn’t sound bad to Forest.
“Five hundred is pocket change for these teams, especially Toronto,” Jude said. “I can guarantee most of his teammates will get triple, maybe quadruple what he would make.”
“Damn, I knew footballers made bank, never realized hockey players did too,” Forest said.
“You have no idea, but maybe the next game we watch, I’ll point out the highest paid players,” Jude said. “It will blow your mind. Actually, I think the Yetis play today and Hunter makes pretty decent money and so does Romeo. If we go to a Toronto game, I’ll show you those big money hitters.”
“Actually…” Forest said, looking between Jude and me. “I got a call from a friend in Texas, and he said he needed a ranch hand working the stockyards.”
His mood and his silence made sense these past few weeks. How long had he known?
“So, you’re leaving?” Jude broke the silence.
Forest looked down at his lap. “I don’t normally stick around. Sterling Ridge was just a stop for me.”
I flinched at the blatant reduction of whatever we were, just a stop for him.
“He’ll need someone in January and—”
“Why wait till then?” Jude snapped.
Forest looked up. “Jude, we knew what this—”
“No, you knew what this was,” I said, getting up off the bed. “You never gave us a chance.”
“You’re leaving too,” he shot back.
“Yeah, but I was ready to make this work, or I don’t know, maybe even stay,” I said.
“I wanted to talk it out with you because I wanted to hear that it was ok for me to leave. That maybe you would be here when I got back or that maybe you would visit me, make this work with me, or even tell me this was crazy.”
“How long would that have lasted before one of us would get tired of it?” Forest snapped.
“What if we never got tired of it?” Jude said softly. “What if it worked out? What if we make a life here?”
“Life isn’t sunshine and rainbows,” Forest scoffed. “My life is on the road. I don’t have a home.”
“No, it’s not,” I growled. “Jude and I know that, but we could be something. This could be home.”
“Home doesn’t have to be here as long as we are somewhere together,” Jude said, his eyes glossy.
“Me leaving isn't up for discussion, it’s happening no matter what,” Forest said, getting up from the bed. “You knew what you were getting into with me. You knew this wasn’t—”
“If this was just fuck-buddy situation, then why do all the extra shit?” Jude growled. “Huh? You crossed that line too, you led us on and don’t tell me you don’t have feelings for us, because I call fucking bullshit.”
“I never said I was staying,” Forest said. “We’ve always had an expiration date and I’m sorry you thought this was going to be something different when you thought that we weren’t anything anyway. I can’t give you what you want. Maybe with me out of the way, you can finally be together.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” I caught his arm before he left the room.
“Yeah, I listen to the gossip that you've been in love with each other for years and it's great you've finally gotten together,” he snapped. “Now you can finally move to Toronto and be a family together over there.”
He yanked his arm out of my grasp.
“Forest,” I said, panicking as he walked away.
“Leave it,” he growled.
“No,” I snapped. “I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about, but we never talked about moving anywhere by ourselves.”
Forest kept walking, not listening to me.
“Forest, dammit, listen to me,” I snarled. “It’s always been you and Jude. It's never been one or the other. I love both of you equally. You each give me something I didn't know I was missing, you make me want things I never knew I wanted and that is because of both of you.”
“Peaches, you don’t love me,” he said, putting his jacket on. “I’m just the person who helped you realize you loved your best friend.”
“Fuck you,” I growled.
“I did, Peaches, and that’s what got us here,” he said, putting his hat on.
“My name is Sam, I stopped being Peaches the moment you reduced us to just a stop,” I said, opening the door for him.
Forest opened his mouth looking towards Jude’s bedroom and I hoped Jude hadn’t hear what he had just said.
“Sam, I—”
I looked away from him not wanting to hear anything more. I didn’t know if my heart could take it and I didn’t want Jude to hear anything else either. Forest had just ripped us apart, and I didn’t even know if we could survive this.