22. Lila
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Lila
I stared at myself in the full-length mirror, unsure if I was looking at the same person who had barely mustered the energy to leave the house a few weeks ago.
My reflection was all dressed up—long, flowing navy gown, the fabric hugging my curves just right, my hair pinned up in soft waves with a few strands framing my face.
For a moment, I didn’t even recognize myself.
But it felt good.
It felt normal.
“You look gorgeous, Lila,” Nate said from the door, his voice low and sincere.
I smiled, turning to him. Nate was in a sharp black suit, looking every bit the part of the charming older brother I’d always known. But tonight, he felt a little different—more grown up somehow.
Maybe it was the way he was looking at me, like it was his responsibility to make sure I had fun. It made my chest tighten, but it also made me feel incredibly cared for.
“Thanks. You clean up well yourself,” I teased, trying to ease the pressure of the moment.
He smiled back, a real, genuine smile, one that I hadn’t seen much of since everything fell apart.
I could tell how much this night meant to him, and I hated the fact that I was holding so many secrets from him… secrets about them .
“You ready for this?” Nate asked, offering me his arm.
I hesitated, glancing at the phone I’d left behind on the vanity, knowing it could ring at any moment. It had been a few days since I’d received the threatening texts, but it didn’t stop the gnawing unease I felt.
I couldn’t bring myself to tell Nate about any of it. How could I? It would only ruin his night, and I didn’t want that.
“Yeah. Let’s go,” I said, trying to sound confident.
He nodded and we left the house together, the cool evening air greeting us as we stepped outside. His car was parked in front of the house, polished and gleaming in the dim light.
The drive to the ball was quiet at first, with just the sound of soft music playing and the hum of the engine.
When we arrived at the venue, the ballroom was exactly as I’d imagined—lavish, glittering with gold and white accents, the kind of place I could never have pictured myself at when I was younger.
A few couples milled around in the lobby, but I felt like all eyes were on me as Nate and I entered.
Nate offered me his arm once again, and I took it without thinking. He looked proud, as if he were showing me off to everyone around us.
Inside, the room was full of laughter, chatter, and the clinking of glasses. Everyone was dressed up, looking sharp and happy.
I felt a twinge of discomfort—everyone looked so put together, while I still felt like I was hiding too much behind my smile.
“You all right?” Nate asked quietly, noticing my discomfort.
I forced a smile. “Yeah, just a little overwhelmed. It’s been a while since I’ve done something like this.”
He gave my arm a reassuring squeeze. “It’s okay. Just relax. You deserve this.”
I nodded, but my stomach did a somersault as we made our way further into the room. It didn’t help that I was acutely aware of the men I’d spent the past few days avoiding.
Jaxon, Colt, Ryan—all of them were here, in tuxedos, standing at the bar, laughing and chatting with people they knew. My chest tightened, and I couldn’t help but glance over at them as we moved deeper into the crowd.
Then, the announcement came.
“All right, everyone, time for the big reveal!” the emcee called, his voice booming through the speakers. “The fire department’s annual calendar has arrived, and we’re ready to show you all just how well the men of Medford clean up!”
The crowd cheered, and I felt my pulse quicken.
This was weird.
It was so intense, I could hardly stand it.
The first image flashed up—Jaxon, looking effortlessly cool in a black shirt and jeans, leaning against an old truck. His blue eyes pierced through the camera, and I could feel my stomach flutter.
Damn it.
The next shot was Ryan, who looked like he could’ve been the star of a Western film. He wore a faded leather jacket, his rugged features illuminated in the soft light. His serious expression made me bite my lip.
Stop it, Lila.
Then there was Colt, striking a more playful pose, arms crossed, a wink on his face as if he were daring anyone to resist him. That one made me laugh, though it hurt at the same time.
He was… sexy, and the way he smirked at the camera had my mind wandering. I couldn’t even help it.
The audience clapped and laughed at the poses as the screen scrolled through the rest of the photos. It was all very lighthearted, funny even.
But as I stood there, watching their images flash across the screen, a strange knot settled in my stomach.
I tried to laugh along with everyone else, but it wasn’t funny to me. Not when I couldn’t stop my body from responding to them —Jaxon, Colt, and Ryan.
They were all so...captivating. Each of their poses had me feeling heat pool in places I didn’t want to acknowledge, places that were off limits for someone who was supposed to be so far beyond all this mess.
“So, what do you think?” Nate asked, nudging me as we watched.
I forced a smile, but it felt too tight, too fake.
“I think it’s… pretty impressive,” I said, trying to sound casual, even though my heart was hammering in my chest. “It turned out well.”
It wasn’t just the photos—it was the way they made me feel . I didn’t want to feel this way. I didn’t want to be turned on by them, not when I couldn’t even sort through the mess in my head.
But there it was. The truth I couldn’t avoid.
When the music shifted and the DJ called out for the next slow song, my breath caught as I felt a hand on my shoulder. I didn’t need to turn around to know who it was.
“May I have this dance, Miss Harper?”
Jaxon’s voice was smooth, but there was something beneath it—an edge that tugged at me. He stood tall behind me, a little too close, his hand hovering over mine.
He looked like he was forcing this, like dancing with me was a chore he couldn’t escape.
I turned, smiling a little, trying to ease the tension that had settled between us for the past few days. “I thought you’d never ask.”
Without waiting for him to respond, I placed my hand in his.
The moment our palms met, I felt the familiar jolt of electricity, a spark that threatened to undo everything I was trying to keep in check.
Jaxon’s hand slid to my back, guiding me gently onto the dance floor. We moved in time with the music, the crowd fading into the background.
“So, how’s the night treating you?” I asked, keeping my voice light, trying to hide how much his touch affected me.
“Fine,” he said. His gaze flickered over my shoulder, not quite meeting my eyes. “You?”
“Same,” I murmured, but it wasn’t true.
Not at all.
There was a long pause, and I could feel the tension in his grip, the way his fingers tightened on my waist, as if he was holding on to something fragile.
Neither of us spoke for a few moments, until he finally muttered, “Nate’s proud of you, you know.”
That struck me. “What do you mean?”
He met my eyes then, briefly. “He’s happy you’re here. You can see it. He’s been worried about you.”
I swallowed hard, feeling the weight of the conversation settle in between us.
“I know,” I said quietly. “I’m glad he’s happy too.”
Jaxon’s jaw tightened, and his expression shifted slightly, like he was considering something, but whatever it was, he didn’t voice it.
The song ended far too quickly.
As Jaxon released me with a quiet murmur of, “Thanks for the dance,” I felt something bittersweet hanging in the air between us.
I didn’t know if it was his silence or my own confusion that made me feel so unsettled, but I couldn’t shake it.
I hadn’t even gotten a chance to catch my breath before another figure loomed in front of me, this one with an unmistakable grin.
“Lila, I know you didn’t think I’d let you get away with that slow dance without getting my turn,” Colt said with a wink.
He didn’t wait for me to respond before he grabbed my hand, pulling me toward him with a playful grin. His eyes sparkled with mischief, and I couldn’t help but smile back, despite the whirlwind of thoughts in my head.
“What’s that? You think I’m avoiding you?” I teased, a little breathless as I let him pull me to the center of the dance floor.
“I know exactly what you’re doing,” Colt said with a laugh, his hands settling on my hips, his fingers brushing dangerously close to my skin. “Trying to avoid the inevitable.”
I chuckled. “And what’s that?”
He leaned in a little closer, his voice dropping low. “A night of fun with me.”
My heart fluttered, but I reminded myself to take a step back. This was Colt, the guy who flirted with everything that moved. He wasn’t serious. He couldn’t be… right ?
Still, his touch was soft, and when we moved together, I couldn’t deny the pull he had over me.
There was something magnetic about him, the way he seemed to understand the game without ever getting too serious. His playful banter kept me on edge, laughing as we swayed together.
“So, who are you taking home tonight?” I asked, pretending to be casual as he twirled me lightly.
Colt grinned widely. “Well, you’re obviously distracting me right now, so I’d say you .”
I tried to keep my composure. “Nice try, Colt. You think that’ll get you what you want?”
He smirked. “Why not? It works every time.”
Just as I felt my nerves start to go into overdrive, a familiar, quiet voice broke through.
“Mind if I cut in?”
I looked up, startled, and found Ryan standing just beside us, looking a little unsure but with his hand already reaching out to me. His eyes were guarded, and he seemed almost out of place on the dance floor, like he wasn’t sure what he was doing there.
I stepped back, and Colt released me with an exaggerated sigh.
“Can’t win them all,” he muttered before walking away.
Ryan looked at me, his expression serious. “May I have this dance, Lila?”
I nodded, trying not to read too much into the way he was looking at me. Ryan wasn’t as open as Colt or Jaxon. He was careful, reserved.
But there was something in the way he hesitated, as if he was unsure of his own feelings about me.
We danced in silence for a few moments, and I tried to keep the nervous energy from spilling over.
“How’s it feel being here, surrounded by all these people?” I asked softly, trying to break the silence. “All of them are supporting you and what you’ve done… the hero you are.”
Ryan glanced down at me, his jaw tightening.
“It’s fine,” he said with a faint smile. “Better than sitting at home, at least.”
I felt a twinge of sadness at the thought. It was hard to tell if he meant that as a general statement or something more personal, but either way, it hurt. Ryan was good at hiding what he truly felt.
We continued to move, but I couldn’t ignore the tightness in his hold. It wasn’t possessive or playful like Colt’s, and it wasn’t as distant as Jaxon’s.
It felt like he was holding back, and the longer I danced with him, the more I wanted him to stop doing that.
Finally, the song ended, and I pulled away with a smile, despite the rush of emotions swirling inside me.
“Thanks for the dance, Ryan.”
He gave me a small nod, not saying much, before he turned and walked off, leaving me feeling more confused than before.
By the time the night drew to a close, I’d danced with all three of them. Each dance felt like it was pulling me in different directions, leaving me dizzy with confusion.
What did it all mean? What did I want? What did I need?
I didn’t have the answers, but the way my heart raced every time I saw them made me think I might be closer to understanding than I was ready to admit.