Chapter 11 #2
“I am already married, Suman,” he sighed tiredly. “Bhai-sa will never allow me to marry another woman. Can’t you understand that? My life is fu… messed up. You don’t want to be with me. I can’t be with another woman. I’ll die longing for a relationship with… love,” he said with agony.
My heart suddenly felt heavier. “But you love the princess, right? No one will ever know what happened between us.”
He shook his head. “No, we don’t love each other. She loves someone else,” he stated in a low, frustrated voice, and I couldn’t stop tears rolling down my cheek.
“So, why are you marrying her?” I asked, unable to understand. He inhaled deeply.
“You’ll not understand,” he said.
Gulping, I pleaded softly, “At least try,”
I didn’t know what was happening to me.
He bit his lower lip slightly and lowered his gaze. “There’s an army waiting on the other side of Him, waiting for all the Indira. It’s enormous, and Mehrangarh is aiding that by supplying some explosive powder.”
“The one you were making the other night?” I asked.
He nodded. “Yes, that one. However, that powder requires something substantial—perhaps equipment as large as a full-grown elephant. You know, it’s massive.
I still don’t know how they will get it across to this side.
Gigantic mountains separate us. I learned about this before Rudra Bhai-sa’s wedding, and since then, I’ve been gathering information.
It seems Mehrangarh might be preparing as well.
I mean, we didn’t have any contacts, and I wasn’t suspicious until I discovered Songarh was selling yellow sand in large quantities to Mehrangarh.
Therefore, Songarh’s connection with Mehrangarh made me feel uneasy. ”
“Why don’t you tell Ranaji anything? And does Princess Aishwarya know about it? What about Prince Ranvijay?” I asked immediately.
He gulped, shaking his head. “Rudra Bhai-sa had bigger problems back then. He had just won the kingdom, and our troubles were just beginning. Another issue could’ve broken us, so I kept it to myself until I had the full story.
But when Ranvijay Bhai-sa married Aishwarya Bhabhi-sa, I saw an opportunity to investigate further.
When he visited Songarh after their wedding on Teej27, he learned about it.
Since then, it has been confirmed,” he said, and I felt my mind racing at the revelation.
“So, does Ranaji know about Mehrangarh’s involvement?” I asked.
He nodded slowly. “But not much. He’s just suspicious.
I didn’t tell him anything because a baby had just arrived at the palace.
The other kingdoms in Indira aren’t ready for a war like that either.
Mahabaleshgarh is still recovering from the loss of King Rajvardhan, and Pratapgarh is under Mahabaleshgarh.
Suryagarh is working hard to strengthen its ties with southern Indira.
It’s family everywhere. And that army is almost twice the size of ours. ”
“What are you thinking?” I asked worriedly, and he lifted his gaze to meet mine. He stared at me for a moment before crashing into a smile.
“Nothing. There’s still time. I mean, maybe a year. By then, our roots will strengthen,” he said, and I exhaled in relief. He nodded, but I still felt he was hiding something.
“Did you play any role in the alliance between Prince Ranvijay and Princess Aishwarya?” I asked, struggling to believe that Prince Ranvijay’s marriage to Princess Aishwarya was coincidental, especially since this state was abundant in that sand.
He shook his head slowly. “No, but I mentioned how good Ranvijay Bhai-sa is to Aishwarya Bhabhi-sa’s father.”
I couldn’t believe it. “You are… I can’t believe you,” I gulped nervously, and he stared deeply into my eyes.
“Don’t worry,” his voice was low. “Everything is fine. It’s not as bad as I’m making it sound,”
I looked into his eyes. “But it doesn’t sound good either,” I said hesitantly.
“It’s not,” he insisted, and I noticed his gaze dropping to our intertwined fingers.
“You trust me, right?” he asked, and I looked at him.
“Why does it matter?” I asked.
“I don’t know,” he confessed before lying back on his chest, stretching his arms, and inhaling deeply. My stomach twisted at the sight.
“But we have to focus on the feast first. There shouldn’t be any mistakes,” he reminded me lazily, closing his eyes.
I gulped silently, glancing at his hand, still holding mine, as if he didn’t want to let go. Silence followed, and I shifted my gaze to his wavy hair; he had a tiny mole on his ear.
A slight smile crept onto my face as I brought my free hand closer to his hair. “Your eyes look beautiful with kohl,” I couldn’t help but say, and a small smile graced his lips.
“Watch out. You seem to be falling for me,” he teased.
I shook my head. “You should be careful before falling if you have expectations. I don’t have any,” I replied softly, brushing his hair away from his forehead.
“That's good,” he murmured.
I hesitated and gulped before asking, “You didn’t explain how… can you… I mean… how is a dagger used?” I struggled to find the right words.
He shifted slightly, covering his face with the end of my dupatta. “You’ll be traumatised,” he mumbled, palms muffling his voice.
“No!” I protested. “I’m experienced. I know things,” I said, even though I couldn’t calm the butterflies in my stomach.
He inhaled deeply and slid his hand over the bed, looking for his dagger before turning to me.
Holding the dagger, he said, “This is gold, and this part goes inside the core,” and then pointed to the handle.
My heart raced at the sight of it. I gulped nervously, staring at the one-inch-thick hilt of the dagger.
That was it!
“And doesn’t it hurt?” I asked.
He lifted his bewildered gaze to me. “What’s your experience with sex? How much have you enjoyed it?”
His question caught me off guard. It felt like we had been friends for ages.
“Um… how can I explain this to you?” I asked, biting my lip, trying to conceal the warmth in my cheeks.
He inhaled deeply and shifted closer, resting his head on my lap. “Are you comfortable?”
I felt a flutter in my stomach, but nodded. “Yes,”
“So tell me then?” he insisted.
I didn’t know how to tell him. I mean, where could I possibly have started? As I hesitated, he sucked on his lower lip, waiting for my response. But I felt compelled to tell him, as if he were the one who needed to know.
“Did he hurt you?” he asked in a low and comforting voice.
I blinked and nodded slowly.
“Always?” he asked, peering into my eyes, and I couldn’t help but nod again.
His face stiffened. “That bastard had one job, and he couldn’t do that,” he cursed, hissing under his breath, and I couldn’t help but smile at his words. “You know I’m glad he’s dead; otherwise, I might’ve sliced him into the same number of pieces he slept with you,” he said, smiling at me.
“That’d be ninety-two,” I said softly, pursing my lips.
He sat up quickly and turned to face me. A few moments of silence followed.
“In how many days?” his gaze darkened.
I gulped nervously, answering. “In three months,”
“Motherfucker!” he cursed, looking away from me. His hands were tightly clenched, and I opened my fingers to let him withdraw his hand, but he looked back into my eyes and pulled my hand.
“Hey, I’m not leaving you.” I chuckled, and a tear slipped down my cheek. He moved closer to me and gazed into my eyes. “Did he ever please you?” he added.
I swallowed to moisten my dried throat.
“I’m not sure what you’re asking,” I said, gazing softly into his eyes. His face drew nearer, and I blinked, feeling my breath grow heavy.
“Like kissing you?” he asked, and I shuddered. “Anywhere?” he asked slowly while I shook my head. “Never went down on you?” he asked, and I frowned. “Like kissing you down there?” I felt shy at the sound of him and lowered my gaze, shaking my head.
“And have you ever had a… release?” he asked slowly, as I lifted my gaze to meet his eyes. I didn’t understand why his words stirred something in my lower belly.
I shook my head slowly as he blinked silently, frowning. “You know, summoning someone’s soul after death is possible. I mean, we can summon that bastard’s soul into a bottle and bury it underground so he never rests in peace—”
“Stop!” I cut him off, shaking my head. “I don’t want to do that or anything related to him,” I clarified, and his gaze softened as he looked at me.
After a brief pause, he gently kissed my forehead.
“I’m here for you,” he drawled.
I froze and stuttered, replying, “I know,” before inhaling deeply and murmuring, “So?” He narrowed his brows. “How does that dagger work?” I hesitated, unable to set my curiosity aside, and he chuckled softly before responding.
He mumbled, “Um…” rolling his tongue over his lips, “so it goes in. Like the time you are comfortable using your hand. I mean, for thrusting,”
I sucked my lip, feeling hot.
“So, you did that to… women? Is that what you meant by… killing women?” I asked slowly, earning a slight nod from him.
Biting my lower lip, I spoke, “I mean, why would someone…” I was uncertain of what to say. “It is terrifying.”
But he shook his head, chuckling softly. “You don’t understand women,” stepping closer and gazing deeply into my eyes. “When a woman tastes sin and craves it, she can either rise like a phoenix or become a slave to her desires.” His voice was deep as he spoke words of enlightenment.
“Are you saying that once a woman knows satisfaction, she can’t avoid it?” He nodded. “But a woman working in a brothel experiences that, right? Why isn’t she satisfied and asking you to spend a night with her?” I asked.
He bit his lip slightly. “You’ve experienced it too. Are you satisfied?” he asked, leaving me stunned.
I shook my head.
“Sadly, the world of man is too occupied satisfying themselves to understand what a woman wants,” he sighed, and I couldn’t agree more with him. My husband never understood that the problem was with him, not me.