Chapter 10
Chapter Ten
Nash strolled back to the palace from the stables, following Laura at a distance, troubled by her last words when she’d left him by the ruins of her family estate. She’d galloped away on horseback, but he’d known there were tears shed.
Laura had been tortured here.
There was no chance she would ever forgive him for that, nor should she.
He had hoped she might come to appreciate the vast opulence of his family estate the way he still did, but that was before he knew the truth about what had gone on while he was away the last time. The memories she had of his home were not happy ones.
How could they be.
It was much too late to make any difference now. Nothing he said could make it right again. So much of their marriage had been spent apart. He’d seen their estrangement happening but hadn’t known how to make things any better. Father’s demanding ways had been a source of tension between them from the start.
So had his need to be a dutiful son and protective brother. He’d sacrificed much to protect his siblings, and that had continued in the years of their marriage. He’d sought peace in the family, but he had not achieved that for his own wife.
And attempting to appease Father hadn’t stopped the man from trying to ruin the estate Algernon was to inherit, either. Nash had worked hard to temper the worst of his poor decisions, running around behind the scenes to make sure things got done without Father knowing.
He’d thought the bulk of Father’s venom had landed on Algernon. But Nash had come in for his share of disdain, too. Only the existence of his sons, the next generation, had given him any respect in his father’s eyes.
But to learn now what had been done to Laura while he was gone, what had driven her to abandon their children and him, made Nash’s blood boil still though he was trying not to show it.
If only Father had left Laura alone, they might have stood a chance of becoming what Laura had hoped for. What he’d hoped for, too.
“I say, Lord Nash, you look like you’re ready to murder someone?”
He pivoted and saw a distant neighbor, Lord Guildford, on the lawn, with Algernon standing silent at his side and smiled. “Hardly, I’ll join you later.”
Nash continued on into the house and up to his bedchamber, intending to change out of his riding clothes but he didn’t know what to do with himself after that. He was not really in the mood for the company of a nosy neighbor, nor the duke either.
His mind continued to spin.
Every bleeding held the risk of death. For Laura to believe her life in danger meant the bloodletting had been very bad indeed. She was not given to flights of fancy. If she’d believed herself in danger, then she absolutely had been.
And where had he been? Running all over the countryside while his wife was unprotected.
It was his fault. The separation, her anger. Isabelle.
All of it.
Nash collapsed into a chair and put his head in his hands.
He could never make it up to her. They would never find peace together.
Their marriage was over, but until today he’d not realized that he had still harbored a secret hope it could be saved.
He looked up and his eyes fell on the sketch of Laura hanging on the wall beside the door connecting his room to hers. She hadn’t changed a bit from when he’d drawn her, and yet he was seeing her with a clearer vision than ever before.
She could hardly stand to be here given what had been done to her. It was only the children that kept her here.
Nash snarled at the closed door and went there to open it. Laura was not inside her room, but it was obvious she had been. Her riding gown was spread across a chair.
He stepped farther into the room and inhaled deeply. The room smelled of her perfume and her. A dozen of her possessions, powders and creams, were scattered over the dressing table surface.
He touched nothing but drank in the scent of Laura’s perfume, and let out a shaky breath. Despite her belief otherwise, Laura had always belonged at Ravenswood. It should have been her home and a place of safety. She should never have been driven to leave it.
Nash would allow no one to interfere in her life ever again.
Only he and Laura should decide the course of their lives from now on, and he vowed they would suffer no more interference from anyone.
He left through Laura’s room and stepped out into the hall. He headed for the stairs and looked up. The nursery was one steep flight of stairs above their rooms, and he couldn’t hear his children or her. He’d never been able to. He had always disliked the distance, but Father would never hear of them having chambers closer to his own and Laura’s.
But there were many empty rooms at Ravenswood.
Rooms that used to be occupied by elderly relatives, long since passed and closed up. There was even an empty apartment, comprising a quartet of bedchambers and a large sitting room, on a lower floor. It wasn’t directly accessible from the main part of the house and thus never used anymore.
Curious about the state of those rooms, he headed downstairs but found the doors stuck fast. He put his shoulder into it and the doors burst open. A cloud of dust rose around him and he sneezed.
When the dust settled, though, he looked about and saw what he expected. Dust cloths covered everything and the curtains at the windows were half rotting away in their places.
However, the apartment had definite possibilities for him and his family.
He walked around slowly to avoid disturbing more dust and looked into every nook and cranny. Yes, definite possibilities. For him, three children and even…for a wife .
He closed his eyes. Laura would not be staying.
Feeling frustrated again, he stalked to the window and tried to look out. The pane was so dirty he had to rub a spot clean with his thumb.
The duke and their neighbor Guildford were walking together upon the lawn directly beneath them. But Laura was with them now, talking to the newcomer.
Suddenly he remembered: Guildford had studied medicine in his youth.
Nash nearly tripped over his own feet in his haste to return downstairs and protect his wife. It was irrational, but the fellow always asked after her health.
As he drew closer, he noticed an expression of concern on Guildford’s face as he spoke with Laura.
Nash’s unease grew. He joined them, placing himself near his wife so there was no doubt who she belonged to.
“Ah, there you are, brother. I was afraid you had forgotten us.”
“What are you doing here, Guildford?”
The duke coughed.
“Well, I chanced upon the news that your lady had returned to Ravenswood. I had to come and see for myself that it was true and pay my respects, of course. It is a pleasure to have her back among us and looking so well, isn’t it? The last time I saw her she was terribly pale.”
Laura said nothing but continued to stare at the man.
Nash shifted closer to his wife, setting his hand under her elbow. Ready to support her if need be.
Guildford laughed wagged a finger at him. “Still as devoted to your wife as ever, I see. I completely understand, and I’d be the same if I were married to her. She is lovelier than ever. After so long apart, I wouldn’t want her out of my reach, either.”
“Nor will she ever be again,” Nash replied, ruffled by the suggestion that she would be soon.
Laura moved toward Guildford, slipping from his grip in the process. “Shall we go inside and take tea?”
“Only if you will accept my escort,” Guildford answered, smirking at Nash. “I should love nothing more than to spend an hour in your company, my dear.”
When Laura accepted his escort inside, Nash could only grind his teeth impotently. That should have been him escorting his wife inside, now she’d finally come home.
Algernon grabbed his arm when he would have followed. “I need to speak with you before we go in.”
“We spoke earlier,” he answered, trying to follow Laura and Guildford.
Algernon, however, would not be stopped or allow him freedom to go after her. “I just remembered something I’d forgotten. It could be helpful.”
“Very well, but only for a moment,” Nash agreed.
Algernon headed for his study and Nash followed along. The duke shut the doors. “What do you remember of the party the evening before your wedding day?”
“Impatience for it to be over. Why?”
“Do you remember if Guildford attended?”
Nash frowned. “He did not, that I recall.”
“When Guildford arrived today and smiled so warmly at Laura, I remembered something that I had forgotten all about.” Nash could feel an icy hand settle between his shoulder blades at the long, drawn-out pause. “Guildford held a tèndre for your wife before your marriage, didn’t he?”
“I don’t remember that,” Nash said, inching toward the study doors. He was more worried about Laura being alone with Guildford due to his medical training than any foolish romantic notions Algernon might harbor.
“Of course you wouldn’t remember. You only saw Laura once you became engaged, and it’s not as if Guildford would say anything after the engagement was announced.”
“Then why do you mention it now?”
“It’s not what he did then, but how he looked at her today,” Ravenswood said quietly. “He disappeared as soon as the engagement was announced, avoided us all for months after the wedding as well…but after each child was born, he comes to call on Laura. He’s not here to see me or you. He came for Laura.”
Nash’s blood ran cold. “There’s nothing between them.”
“Not today, but who knows what tomorrow will bring,” Algernon said, grinning. “Think about it. This is almost too perfect a solution. You and Laura still want to divorce. So if she marries Guildford, the children will still be able to have their mother visit them as often as she likes. Perhaps they could even stay with her on Guildford’s estate when you’re away or have a second family to tend.”
“I would never let my children live anywhere but Ravenswood.”
“Well, that is for you to decide in the end, of course. Laura will have no say and must abide by your wishes about that. But I won’t stop her from visiting them here. And if Guildford doesn’t suit her for a second husband, there are other bachelors of a suitable age in the district that I’d image might fancy her for a wife.”
Nash bristled. “It is not up to you to suggest anyone for her to remarry!”
Algernon spread his hands wide. “But brother, what can it hurt to nudge things along in that direction? It would be best to broach the subject with her before she decides where she’ll go to live.”
The duke continued, unaware that Nash was wishing he could strangle his own brother to shut him up. Guildford could bleed her again and no one would be able to stop him.
“Look, you can discuss the matter with Laura during our meetings, or I am offering to mention it instead. Get the suggestion out in the open. It’s not as if you seem to want her still and she doesn’t want to be here after everything done to her. I could even offer to host her wedding breakfast, if that would help speed things along and reassure her of our support.”
A fine film of rage washed over Nash as he imagined a wedding breakfast held here, with Laura kissing some other groom. He fought jealousy, fisting his hands by his sides rather than following his instincts to shut the duke’s mouth with them. “You will say nothing to her about this ridiculous idea of yours!”
“But Nash, where did you imagine she’d go? She can’t stay at those ruins of her old family home. She has to belong somewhere.”
“She belongs here .” He shook his head stubbornly. He could not tolerate Laura living in squalor. It was bad enough she’d spent even one night there alone. “I will talk to her about her plans for the future later.”
The duke smiled brightly. “All right, then. I’m glad you’re keeping an open mind and want the best for her. I know I was against the divorce, but after seeing you two bicker constantly over every little thing these past weeks, I concede I might have been wrong that your marriage could be saved. Now, we’d better go join your wife and her potential beau and act as chaperones, so there is no hint of impropriety. We wouldn’t want any scandal surrounding Laura’s second marriage, now would we?”
Algernon left the room first, but when he went to follow, Nash’s legs refused to work properly. He staggered toward the bookcase to hold himself up as his stomach churned. He’d never bothered to imagine Laura’s life after the divorce in detail, other than the disgrace that might follow them about for years. He’d only thought about what he wanted.
But of course, there was the very real possibility of her being married again. She would need a home, protection. That Laura could marry someone he knew bothered him a great deal.
She might even come to love them.
His stomach flipped alarmingly.
Laura, his beautiful wife, could belong to someone else soon. She would take their hand, pull them into her bed and give her body, her limitless passion, to them alone in the dark.
A privilege he’d taken for granted.
He cursed under his breath.
Of course Laura would eventually marry someone after they divorced. She would need the company and protection of a man who did a better job than he had.
Nash would never want her to be all alone.
But she would be alone unless she remarried.
And right now, Laura was in the drawing room to take tea with a potential suitor who might doctor her to death one day. And although the duke was joining them, Nash was uncertain he could be trusted. Not when he was so keen to have Laura married off almost immediately after the divorce was final.
Nash hastened to join them, but he pulled himself to a stop outside the drawing room doors, just out of sight of the occupants to listen. He heard the duke and Guildford speaking, but Laura was oddly silent. Was she enthralled by Guildford’s conversation? Was she sitting there wishing she’d married him instead, now, too?
Well, she had not. Laura had married him and was still his lady. His wife.
He smoothed his hair, straightened his waistcoat, and, after a moment’s hesitation, strolled in as if he owned the room.
Guildford smiled his way, but he barely cared about the man’s welcome. Nash searched the room for Laura.
But Laura was not in the room anymore.
He glanced at the duke and raised one brow.
Algernon smiled. “She just went looking for you. As you can see, Guildford, my brother and his wife can barely stand to be separated. Never satisfied unless they know exactly where the other is these days.”
“Even after so many years apart?” Guildford asked, and his gaze landed on Nash’s left hand, where his ring ought to be. “Where was she all that time, I wonder?”
“I have always known my wife’s location,” he bluffed. “We wrote to each other often,” he continued, ignoring how Algernon gaped and then quickly hid the expression.
Guildford seemed to consider him overlong and then shrugged. “I’m surprised you would even let her out of your sight after what I heard of her illness. I never would have let her leave Ravenswood. She was terribly unwell I heard. But now that I’ve seen for myself that my fears were unfounded, I must take my leave and spread the word. I trust you’ll convey my apologies to your wife and my profound regret for being unable to stay longer. But I will return to speak with her on another day.”
“Of course,” the duke said. “You are always welcome.”
Nash could not find words that would convey his satisfaction at having the man leave so soon and merely nodded.
He watched the man go in silence, observed the duke begin to grin as soon as Guildford was out the door and on his horse again. “He admires her still, I’d say.”
“You will say nothing about that man to my wife, or I will never speak to you again.”
The duke sauntered closer. “Does the thought of a rival irritate? Your wife is lovely and young enough to bear another man his heir. Guildford does need an heir. I’m sure he’d waste no time bedding her.”
Nash lashed out, striking the duke squarely on the jaw and sending him reeling into a chair that shattered beneath him.
The duke lay stunned a long moment among the debris, and then he smiled again. “Fight it all you want, but this divorce is the last thing you really want, isn’t it?”
“You’re wrong,” he insisted.
“Can you imagine her lying in a strange man’s bed, waiting for Guildford, wearing only a smile?”
Nash took a step toward the duke, fists rising. Yet his greatest fear was Laura weak after being bled again and that he wouldn’t be there to stop it. “Get up and say that again!”
The duke wisely stayed where he was. “Be angry with me if you like, brother, but it’s yourself you should be furious with. She was your match, and you let her slip through your fingers. Shame on you.”
Before he could react, he heard a gasp behind him. He knew who it was without turning.
Laura rushed to crouch beside Algernon. “What is going on?”
Nash glared at Algernon who wisely held his tongue.
“I tripped and fell,” Algernon told her.
“Where is Guildford?”
“Gone but he’ll be back soon I expect,” Algernon promised her and Nash gritted his teeth at the certainty of that.
Since Nash could not hit his brother again, nor admit what had really provoked his anger enough to make a fool of himself in front of his wife, he barreled from the room as fast as his legs could carry him.