19. Chapter 19 #2
“Uh… yes,” Ludiin said, rubbing his arms, trying to soothe the shiver crawling over his skin.
Ford turned to the workbench, eyeing the dismantled pleasuring bot with curiosity. “Is this your new project?”
“Yes,” Ludiin answered, suddenly aware of how personal his space was, how exposed he felt letting someone like Ford in.
A stranger.
Fuck. He’d done it again. Reacting without thinking. It was all Tarymn’s fault.
“What is it?” Ford asked, walking toward it with gleaming eyes.
Shit. Now, he was going to think I’m crazy.
“You can tell me,” Ford coaxed, flashing a grin. “I’m curious about everything you do.”
Ludiin hesitated, heart pounding. “It’s called the Alpha Experience, and…”
“Oh shit!” Ford interrupted, practically vibrating with excitement. “You’re making an alpha?”
“Not an alpha. It’s…”
“I never thought that was possible,” Ford laughed, slapping his own forehead. “What am I saying? You’ve made all kinds of amazing pleasuring bots. I’m sure you can build anything you want. You’re a genius.”
Ludiin’s cheeks flushed with heat, the rush of embarrassment creeping up to his ears. He’d never had anyone gush over him before, not like this. It felt weird.
“I’m kind of stuck, actually,” Ludiin blurted out, wanting him to stop. “There are a lot of things I don’t understand about alphas…”
“Use me.”
Ludiin blinked. “What?”
“Use me,” Ford said, stepping closer. “I’ll be your model.”
The instinct to step back rushed through him, but he froze when he saw movement behind Ford. Tarymn on the landing, watching.
Ludiin’s heart skipped a beat.
Ford moved even closer, smiling.
Tarymn’s eyes narrowed, going dark.
Ludiin shivered.
Ford mistook the reaction for something else. “Is that a yes?”
“I…” Ludiin’s tongue tripped over itself. He barely registered the words forming in his mouth, his entire focus locked on Tarymn.
The alpha stood there, silent and brooding, his golden eyes aglow with something that shimmered in the air like heat off a flame.
That gaze crawled over Ludiin’s skin, sent tingles down his spine, and lit a fire low in his belly.
A dangerous ache. The kind that made him want to test Tarymn. To push him. Break him. Own him.
From somewhere outside himself, he watched his lips stretch into a smile and heard the words tumble out of his mouth: “Yes. You can be my model.”
He turned to his workbench before Ford could reply, his pulse fluttering.
“What do you want me to do first?” Ford asked, clearly eager.
“Take your clothes off,” Ludiin blurted.
He winced. Damn. Had he really just said that?
Ford laughed, a little startled but amused. “Wow. Straight to it, huh? I thought we’d ease into this. But okay. I guess it’s an honor, you modeling a bot after me.”
He tugged at his collar just as Tarymn’s voice broke the moment.
“Ludiin,” he said, his scent sweeping through the space thick and charged with dominance. It filled the room, slithered into Ludiin’s lungs, and curled possessively around his body. Ludiin tensed. Every nerve screamed at him to lower his gaze. Submit. But he clenched his jaw.
Nope never. Not after the way he treated me.
“Damn,” Ford muttered under his breath. “Didn’t realize you were an aggressive alpha.”
He tried to play it off with a strained smile, but it was clear the scent was getting to him. Still, he stood his ground.
Ludiin shot Tarymn a venomous look. You asshole.
Tarymn smiled in return—a cruel, knowing curve of his lips. Then, as if granting mercy, his scent receded, giving the room space to breathe again.
“Are you going to introduce me?” Tarymn asked casually, like they weren’t in the middle of a tense standoff.
“What?” Ludiin blinked at him, thrown off balance. He knew Tarymn recognized Ford. Of course, he did. And he’d heard him and Luci argue about him earlier. He was fucking there. So why was he pretending otherwise? Why demand an introduction he didn’t need?
“Well?” Tarymn pressed. “Who is he?”
“This is Ford,” Ludiin muttered, forcing the words out. “I met him last night. Luci invited him. You already know that.”
“I know,” Tarymn said smoothly, though the darkening of his eyes betrayed him. He turned his attention on Ford, gaze assessing. “What the fuck do you want from Ludiin?”
Ford barely spared him a glance as he answered with cool confidence. “I want to be Ludiin’s friend. And I’m also his newly appointed model.” He stretched his arms over his head, offering Ludiin an easy smile that only made the tension spike higher. “So… where do you want me?”
“Uh… uh… on the couch,” Ludiin said, backing away toward the workbench. He snatched up his e-reader and hugged it to his chest like a shield.
He didn’t look at Tarymn. He couldn’t. But he could still feel him. Like heat against his back. Like fingers dancing up his neck in a soft caress.
“Should I take all my clothes off, or…?” Ford asked, already tugging at his shirt.
“Just the shirt,” Ludiin answered too quickly.
He didn’t want Ford naked. The only alpha he wanted to see like that was standing ten feet away, carved out of tension and temptation. Hovering darkly.
On autopilot, Ludiin dragged a chair toward the couch and sank into it, e-reader balanced on his knee, stylus hovering above the screen.
His hand moved instinctively, sketching the outline of Ford’s form, but his mind was in shambles.
How the hell was he supposed to concentrate with Tarymn looming there?
What was wrong with him? Did he have something to say or was he just going to keep staring until Ludiin snapped?
Ludiin’s throat tightened, last night flashing in his mind like a stain he couldn’t scrub away.
Maybe they should just talk about it. Drag it into the open and end this slow, suffocating torture.
He parted his lips, ready to speak, but before a single word could escape, Ford suddenly gasped.
“Oh, shit,” Ford whispered dramatically. “He finally left. I thought he was going to kill me.”
Ludiin blinked. “What? He wouldn’t do that.”
Ford gave him a look. “Are you sure about that?”
“Yes. Why would he do that?”
“You,” Ford said, sitting up a little straighter, his gaze focused on Ludiin. “He wants you.”
Ludiin stilled, breath caught in his chest.
“And I think you want him too,” Ford added gently.
“No. I don’t.”Ludiin shot to his feet, heart hammering so loud it filled his ears.
“Hey, I didn’t mean to upset you,” Ford said behind him, rising to his feet. Thankfully, he’d put his shirt back on. “It was just... a vibe, I got. If it’s not true, it’s not true.”
But it was true. Ludiin wanted Tarymn with every fiber of his being. No matter how many years he’d spent trying to bury it, the feeling refused to die. And gods, he was terrified. Terrified of slipping back into the same helpless path he’d stumbled down before.
“Is it that obvious?” he asked defeated.
“A little,” Ford replied with a tilt of his head. “You should go talk to him. Tell him how you feel.”
The thought alone sent an involuntary shiver crawling down Ludiin’s spine. His chest tightened, and he quickly shook his head. He couldn’t. Not when the memory of rejection still clawed at him.
So, he forced a smile, masking the ache with practiced ease, and turned back to Ford. “Sit back. This is going to take a while.”
“Yes, boss,” Ford chuckled.
Ludiin found himself smiling too. For the first time in his life, he wondered if maybe…just maybe…he’d found the second alpha he might actually like.