Chapter 4
I woke early on Monday morning. I’d had a rough night, struggling to sleep as I’d been plagued by thoughts of Noah. I was still in so much pain after our breakup, but my body betrayed me because I still wanted him despite everything that had happened.
I was exhausted, and I considered rolling over to try to get back to sleep again.
The thought was tempting, but given how active my mind was, I knew it would be useless.
Whenever I closed my eyes, I saw Noah and the way he had looked at my lips yesterday.
I didn’t want to lay here and torture myself thinking about him.
I groggily pushed myself up and smiled when I saw Anna and Cress both asleep in Cress’s bed.
They’d escaped from the garden party not long after me and taken it upon themselves to distract me from the breakup for the rest of the day.
We spent all of Sunday afternoon watching movies and eating ice cream, and we’d stayed up late into the night painting our nails and applying face masks.
Anna had ended up crashing here, and it warmed my heart to know that, despite everything that happened with Noah, I still had some pretty amazing friends at this school.
I reached over to my bedside table and picked up my phone.
There was a notification splayed across the lock screen.
I had a message, and although the contact name said Caldwell, it was from my father.
Judging by the timestamp on the message, he had sent it the day before.
I must have missed it while spending time with the girls.
Hello, Isobel, I hope you’re well. Please accept my sincerest apologies for my absence at the principal’s garden party today.
I had to get back to New York for urgent business this morning, and I’m afraid it will keep me here for a couple of weeks.
I know we still have a lot to catch up on, and I promise we will do just that as soon as I can get back to Weybridge.
In the meantime, if you need anything at all, please feel free to reach out. Matthew.
It was hard not to be disappointed. It felt like he was avoiding me just when I needed to talk to him most. I was completely in the dark about what had happened between him and the Hastings family.
It must have been pretty bad considering Noah had to break up with me.
I was also still wrestling with how to feel about my father after hearing the history of his relationship with my mom.
Now was just about the worst time for him to disappear to New York for a couple of weeks.
I considered calling him right back but then thought better of it.
It was too early in the morning, and I needed to try to clear my head as much as possible before I spoke to him.
I slowly eased myself from bed, trying my best to be quiet, and changed into my running gear.
I was tiptoeing to the door when I heard movement, and I glanced over to find Cress propped up in bed.
“Where are you going?” she whispered.
“For a run.”
“Now?” She struggled to keep the disbelief from her eyes.
“You know I like to run in the mornings.”
“But it’s not even light out.”
I rolled my eyes. “The sun will be rising any minute. I’ll see you when I get back.”
She shook her head, muttering something about how crazy I was before burrowing back under her blanket.
I felt a twinge of jealousy but knew I wasn’t going to feel any better if I went back to bed.
I left the room before I could reconsider.
The last thing I felt like doing was exercising, but I desperately needed the peace I always felt when jogging.
The morning was crisp, and my skin prickled from the cool air as I emerged from the dorm. The sky was overcast with darker clouds gathering across the horizon. I was somewhat grateful I couldn’t see the sun rising to greet the new day. I didn’t need its happy face mocking me today.
I set out at a brisk walk, hoping to warm up my limbs before I started jogging.
I’d barely made it across the quad when my phone started to ring.
The sound made me jump as it broke through the silent morning air and my chest tightened as I wondered whether it could be my father.
I hadn’t replied to his message from the day before so perhaps he had decided to reach out directly.
My shoulders relaxed when I checked the screen and saw it was my mom.
“Hey, Mom,” I answered, slowing my steps so I could focus on the call.
“Oh great, you’re up,” she said, sounding far more chipper than I felt. “I was hoping to catch you before school started for the day.”
“You know it doesn’t start for a couple more hours, right?” This was early, even for her.
“Yes, but I know you rarely sleep past sunrise, and I’m starting work early today because I’ve got to spend time later training the new waitress.”
“Ah.” I couldn’t help feeling guilty when she mentioned my replacement at the café.
The new girl had been working there for a little while now, but Norma had said she’d been struggling, so maybe she was in need of a little extra training.
I felt bad because my mom had more than enough to worry about already.
It should be me helping her with the café.
But I was never going to convince her to let me ditch school and come home no matter how hard I tried.
“So, how was it?” Mom asked, her voice filled with anticipation.
I knew she was talking about the ball, and it took all of my self-control not to give in to the emotions battling their way to the surface as I recalled the evening’s events once again.
“Noah and I broke up,” I said.
“What?” Confusion colored my mom’s tone. “I can’t believe it. He was so clearly lovestruck by you.”
“Well, whatever he felt for me mustn’t have been strong enough because we’re over.
“But why?”
“Apparently there’s some bad blood between Matthew and Noah’s families, and Noah’s grandfather told him to break it off with me.”
“And he did it?”
“Yeah.” I was really struggling to keep from crying now. I’d managed not to shed a single tear yesterday, but speaking with my mom made it all suddenly feel real.
“What happened between their families?”
“They’re business rivals, I guess. I’ve been wanting to talk to Matthew about it, but I haven’t seen him since the ball. Whatever the issue, it was enough for Noah to just cast me aside. I guess you did warn me.”
“Oh, Isobel. I’m so sorry. I really thought he was different. I wish I could be there to give you a big hug.”
“Me too,” I said. “But I’m about to do the next best thing. I’m going to go for a run to clear my head.”
“That sounds like a good idea,” Mom replied. “You always feel better about things after running.”
“Yeah.”
The other end of the line went silent for a few seconds before my mother spoke again. “Have you had a chance to talk to your dad about anything else?” I knew she was referring to Matthew’s side of the story about their past relationship.
“Yeah, we spoke at the ball.”
“And...”
“He told me that his parents stopped him from finding out about me. He only learned I existed after his dad died and he found your letter.”
We both fell silent again. No matter how many times I recalled what my father had told me at the ball, it always seemed to take a few moments to digest.
“How do you feel?” Mom finally broke the silence. “I know it’s a lot to take in.”
“Well, I believe him, if that’s what you mean,” I replied. “I feel like he really does want to get to know me.”
“He does.” My mom’s voice cracked as she spoke, and she took a couple of deep breaths.
“Mom, are you okay?”
“Yes, yes.” She sniffed, clearly holding back tears. “I just… I just feel so bad that you’re going through all this on your own. Everything with your father and now Noah. I should be there to help you through it.”
“It’s okay, Mom,” I reassured her. “I’m okay. You’ve got to look after the café. My replacement isn’t going to train herself.”
I heard her splutter out a laugh on the other end of the line. “I guess that’s true,” she said, though her voice was still rough with emotion. It had been sounding a little scratchy the whole conversation, so I wondered if she was coming down with a cold.
“I just want you to know how proud I am of you,” she continued. “I know there’s a lot going on, but you’re going to come through all of this stronger than ever.”
“Thanks, Mom.”
“And I’ll do my best to come and visit you as soon as I can.”
“Okay.” I smiled. “I’ll hold you to that.”
Silence fell over the phone call once again. Neither of us wanted to hang up, but I wasn’t sure what else there was to say. I needed to get running, and my mom needed to get to work
“I’ll let you get back to it, Mom.” I finally said. “Plus, it’s cold out here, so I better start running.
“Okay,” she agreed. “But call me anytime. I love you, Iz.”
“I love you too, Mom.”
I hung up the phone and took a moment to gather myself.
Hearing my mom’s voice made me feel better, but the moment the phone call ended, I felt the gaping void of her absence.
She’d been the one to get me through my last breakup, and I knew it was going to be a battle trying to get over Noah without her hugs, optimism, and pecan pie to keep me going.
I had no choice in the matter though. Mom was back in Rapid Bay and I was here at Weybridge. I was just going to have to muddle through this breakup on my own—as hard as that might be.
As I set out on my jog, I considered heading into the forest that surrounded the school.
The idea of disappearing among the trees was quite appealing to me right now.
But as I neared the worn dirt path that led into the trees, I decided not to take it.
The woods reminded me too much of Noah. We’d had our first proper conversation there—yes, I’d wanted to kill him at the time, but looking back, I knew I’d misjudged him then.