Chapter 11
Evan Jones dried his hands on the towel and beamed at Mac.
‘Well, the good news is that their teeth haven’t deteriorated since the last check-up,’ he said.
‘I’ve had a good rummage around in their mouths and neither are in bad condition.
Nor is the rest of them, come to that. I take it you’ve been following the feeding routine your mother and I agreed for them? ’
Mac handed the vet the mug of tea he’d requested – ‘three sugars, please, just enough milk to turn it from black to brown’ – and nodded at the list stuck to the fridge-freezer. ‘It’s all on there,’ he said. ‘I’ve got to be honest. I hadn’t expected the dental check-up to be so… thorough.’
He still felt queasy. It had all been a lot more clinical than he’d realised.
The poor old ponies’ heads had, in turn, been placed on a headstand, each one’s mouth held open with a speculum while Evan, wearing a bright head light, peered inside with a dental mirror, poked and prodded with dental picks and probes, and even rasped a couple of sharp points on one of the elder pony’s teeth.
It had made Mac wince, though Jacob Armitage hadn’t seemed to mind.
‘They’re getting on,’ Evan reminded him. ‘Just like with humans, teeth wear out as they get older. It’s important ageing animals have regular check-ups. That’s why your mother and I agreed on six-monthly calls. I’m pleased you’ve kept that up.’
Mac shrugged, not sure whether to confess that he’d had nothing to do with it. He’d simply received a text from Stella the previous day to tell him that the vet would be visiting for the ponies’ regular dental check and that he’d better be in.
‘I’m sorry about your mother,’ Evan said, sitting at the table as if he was perfectly used to making himself at home in Watersmeet.
Maybe he was. With all the animals and birds his mother had cared for over the years Mac had no doubt that she and the local vet had been on first-name terms. ‘She was a good woman. Heart of gold. Couldn’t bear the thought of any living creature suffering, could she? ’
‘No. She really couldn’t.’ Was that, Mac wondered, why she’d left him Watersmeet? To make sure that, like all her waifs and strays, he had a safe and secure roof over his head?
‘It must all seem pretty overwhelming to you, though.’ Evan surveyed him thoughtfully. ‘Not used to animals, are you? Not since you got married any road, and how long ago was that? Thirty-five years or more.’
‘You’re very well informed,’ Mac said cautiously.
‘Your mother and I were good friends,’ Evan said sadly. ‘We shared a love for animals of course, and we talked. She said Lynne wasn’t an animal lover.’
‘She had allergies,’ Mac said, sounding unconvincing even to himself. His wife had hated the thought of animal hair and all the other mess that came with having pets, and she’d made it very clear that, as much as her children begged and pleaded, a cat or a dog was out of the question.
‘Ah. I see. Either way, your mother thought it a shame that you had no pets. Oh, don’t look at me like that, lad!
She just needed someone to confide in, you know.
And Stella – Stella is a good woman, and your mother loved her to bits, but she wasn’t always as…
’ He considered for a moment. ‘As open-minded as she might have been,’ he finished tactfully.
‘No. Stella thinks what she thinks.’ Mac sipped his black coffee, feeling ill at ease. How much did this big, burly man know about him? About who he was and what he’d done? Just how much had his mother confided?
‘There’s no judgement here, Ian,’ Evan said, as if he’d read his mind. ‘Things happen. The point is you did the right thing in the end, and you’ve come through it. That deserves some recognition and respect, if you ask me. What matters now is the future.’
Mac gave a half laugh. ‘I don’t think about the future. It’s too much. I have enough on my plate getting through today, thanks very much.’
‘Aye, well, they say that’s ’best way,’ Evan agreed. ‘One day at a time.’
Mac said nothing. Sometimes, on the worst days, it was a question of one hour at a time. One moment at a time. He realised those darkest days were growing further and further apart, but they could still happen when he least expected them.
‘It’s Mac, by the way,’ he said.
Evan frowned. ‘What is?’
‘My name. I don’t answer to Ian any longer. I’ve left him behind with everything else.’
Evan nodded. ‘Understood. Well, Mac it is then. Any other problems that I should know about? All the rest of your animal family okay?’
‘I think so. The Fosters at Carr Farm have been brilliant, and I’m pretty sure that if there was anything wrong with any of them, they’d have told me.’
‘I don’t mind taking a look at them if you want to be really sure.’
Mac wasn’t sure how to phrase his response, so he simply shook his head and said it was fine.
‘I wouldn’t charge,’ Evan said quickly, obviously guessing what he’d been thinking. ‘I meant as a favour to your mother really. I promised her, you see. I promised that I’d always keep an eye on things.’
Mac sighed. ‘So, deep down she didn’t really trust me with them?’
Evan frowned. ‘That’s not what I meant at all.
Look, I won’t lie to you. Your mother and I had a few long talks about the future: what would happen to the animals when she passed away.
She knew Stella wouldn’t keep them. Stella’s got a good heart, but your mother was all too aware the lines your sister’s thoughts would run along, and she couldn’t take the risk.
Stella would justify getting rid of the animals to herself.
She’d tell herself it was for the best and she might even believe it.
Your mother didn’t want that. She wanted them to stay here at Watersmeet.
The first place they’d ever had a secure, loving home.
No more upheaval for them, that’s what she said, and I agreed. ’
‘I get that,’ Mac said heavily. ‘But what do I know about animals? I mean, Highland cattle! Ponies. Ex-battery hens. Bloody ducks, for God’s sake! I’ve enough on just with a cat and a dog.’
‘Be grateful old Ma Larkin’s gone to the great pigsty in the sky,’ Evan said with a chuckle. ‘Now, she was a handful! She’d have run rings round you.’
Mac grinned. ‘So I heard. Mum used to write to me, telling me all about her.’ His smile faded as he realised he wouldn’t get any more letters from his mother.
Even when he’d thought she’d never find him, somehow a letter would wing its way to him sooner or later, having bounced from one address to another.
She never gave up. Good old-fashioned letters that had kept him anchored to home, somehow, more than any text or email ever could, all written on thick notepaper with a proper fountain pen.
He’d found the pen in her desk drawer last week. He’d sat and stared at it for ages.
‘Bloody Ma Larkin,’ he said, shaking his head. ‘Where did she get these crazy names?’
‘Literature! Your mother loved a good book, didn’t she?’ Evan said, laughing. ‘Every single animal is named after a fictional character. Oh, she was one in a million, your mother, she really was.’
‘I know,’ Mac said quietly. ‘She deserved a better son than me. Stella was so good to her. She’s right to be angry. She should have Watersmeet really.’
‘Like I said, your mother couldn’t trust Stella with the animals.
And the last thing she wanted was for her precious land to be sold off as an extension to that bloody caravan park.
You know as well as I do that’s what would have happened if she’d left it to Stella.
Not because your sister’s greedy or uncaring, but because of Gavin.
Your mother said, divorce or no divorce, Stella would do what Gavin wanted, and he needs more land.
He’s losing bits of Tide’s Reach to the sea every year.
Sooner or later, he’s going to run out of space for his caravans, and this place is as far away from the sea as it’s possible to get in Kelsea Sands. ’
He gave a contented sigh. ‘By, you’re a lucky man owning this place.
Not the way you came to own it, obviously.
That’s a crying shame. But the fact that Watersmeet is yours.
This lovely house. The land. The views across the Humber, and the curve of Kels Point straight ahead and beyond it the sea…
I’d wake up every morning saying a prayer of thanks if I lived here. ’
‘Where do you live?’ Mac asked, curious.
‘Millensea,’ Evan explained. ‘Our practice is there so it makes sense. Nice house. Nice town. But very peopley, if you know what I mean. Holidaymakers. Day trippers. Not like here. Here you can hear yourself think.’
‘Maybe we should swap houses,’ Mac said, only half joking. ‘I think it would be good to be in a place where you can’t hear your own thoughts.’
Evan studied him for a moment, as if trying to decide how serious he was. ‘Your mother loved you so much,’ he said at last. ‘She trusted you. She knew you’d do the right thing.’
‘Of course she didn’t trust me! How could she?’ Mac asked brokenly. ‘After everything I did! Everything that happened!’
‘She never blamed you for that.’
‘Well, she’s the only one then,’ Mac said bitterly. ‘Everyone else did, me most of all. I don’t blame our Stella for hating me.’
‘Er, Stella didn’t do too badly out of it,’ Evan reminded him.
‘She may not have got the house, but she got plenty of financial compensation.’ As Mac raised an eyebrow, he nodded.
‘Oh yes, I know. I was a witness to the will. Stella did all right, and it’s not as if she was destitute in the first place, was it?
Her divorce settlement was substantial, from what your mother told me.
I mean, she’s not a billionaire but she’ll never have to work for a living, will she?
Not that it’s any of my business,’ he added hastily, ‘and I certainly wouldn’t be saying any of this to anyone but you, but my point is, you mustn’t feel too guilty about all this.
Guilt can lead you on a downward spiral, and that’s the last thing you need. ’
‘So you know about my monthly allowance, and the trust, too?’ Mac asked wearily.
Evan nodded and took another sip of his tea.
‘I’m aware that you got the house, but all the money you’ll need to keep it running and to provide for the animals is locked away, with Stella holding the purse strings.
She can’t refuse you, though. If you need repairs doing to the house or outbuildings, if you need food for the animals or’ – he nudged Mac with a grin – ‘vet’s bills paying, she’s got to pay it. You needn’t worry about that.’
‘Like I said, Mum knew she couldn’t trust me.’
‘I don’t think it was that,’ Evan said kindly.
‘But she knew you didn’t trust yourself, and until you start to do that, you’re still vulnerable.
Plus, she had another reason for putting Stella in charge of the finances for this place.
Don’t you get it? She knew Stella would take it badly – losing Watersmeet.
She was afraid the two of you would fall out for good, so she made damn sure that you’d have to stay in contact, whether you liked it or not. ’
‘Wily old bird, wasn’t she?’ Mac said, a wry smile playing on his lips.
‘Canny,’ Evan agreed fondly. He glanced around the kitchen. ‘What about this place? The house, I mean. Anything need doing to it?’
‘Well, I need a new bed, that’s for sure,’ Mac said with feeling. ‘The bed in my old room must be the same one I used to sleep in when I was a kid, and to be honest, I don’t fancy sleeping on Mum’s old bed, even though it’s fairly new. I thought I’d turn her room into a guest room just in case…’
His voice trailed off as he realised he didn’t want to jinx things by putting into words the hope that, one day, his children would come to stay at Watersmeet. ‘Anyway,’ he finished, ‘a new bed. I’ve been granted permission to buy one. Aren’t I the lucky one?’
‘I know your monthly allowance is probably enough to cover food and bills, but have you had any thoughts on what you’re going to do with yourself now you’ve moved back here? Any job in mind?’
Mac shook his head. ‘Like I said, I take one day at a time.’
Evan nodded. ‘Well, I’m sure something will come to you in the end. You’re still young enough to find your place in the world.’
‘I’m sixty-two!’
‘Exactly! Only sixty-two! I’m seventy, in case you’re interested.
Should have retired years ago but bugger that for a game of soldiers.
I’m far too young and dynamic.’ He drained his mug and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
‘I enjoyed that. You make a right good cuppa. Nearly as good as your mother’s.
‘Now look, if you need anything – anything at all – you only have to ask. Here’s my card, right?
Even if you just want to call and ask for advice over the phone about the animals.
But also if you ever want to talk about…
Well, anything. You know. You mustn’t be alone, Mac.
Someone in your position – you need people to talk to.
If you need a listening ear, I’m here. You understand? ’
Mac smiled, seeing the genuine kindness and concern in the vet’s eyes. ‘Thank you. I’ll remember that.’
‘See that you do.’
Evan got to his feet and patted Mac on the shoulder.
‘I can see myself out, no need to show me to the door. Just remember, I’m here, however lonely you might feel right now.
I thought the world of your mother, and she thought the world of you, so that makes us pals in my eyes. I know you won’t let her down.’
Mac couldn’t reply, his throat was so tight with emotion. Evan nodded and smiled then picked up his bag and headed for the door.
‘I’ll send the bill to Stella,’ he called over his shoulder. ‘I’m sure she’ll be delighted that the ponies are in the very best of health. We both know she’d hate for anything to happen to these precious animals.’