Chapter 29
“You are making a mistake,” Lily announced when she barged into Killian’s study later that evening.
She had tried not to say a thing while watching his men gather in the grand hall to plan their invasion of McLennan Castle.
Lily could not watch all these men march to their deaths, knowing full well that Duncan’s clan could crush them.
She cautioned when Killian did not stop staring at his maps, “You will be outnumbered. Laird McLennan’s army is not just an army of men.
He has over five thousand men, all of whom are ready to die at his command.
You do not stand a chance against him at war, Killian…
Do not let your anger blind you. Think about your men. Think about—”
“Do ye think I am nae thinkin’ about my men?” Killiam thundered, cutting her off. “Do ye think I dinnae want to protect them? That I am choosin’ war when there is somethin’ else to be done?”
His eyes flared with his rage as he spoke to her. Lily had never seen him this angry. Even though his words to her the previous night had cut her deep, she still had chosen to stay.
I said I would fight with him, and I would.
Lily did not want to think of why she had chosen to stay. Killian needed her here, even though he had said otherwise, and that was all she could let herself think of.
“Laird McLennan did not do this,” Lily insisted and tried to get him to look at her again.
“Richard Easton wanted to say something. He spoke of his ledger and the man with your brother the night they met. I do not think it was Laird McLennan, Killian… You have to listen to me. Let us find those ledgers first, and then we can—”
“Stop!” Killian ordered, and his sharp tone made Lily recoil. Her eyes searched his as he turned fully to her. “You still defend him? Even after all of this? After everythin’ ye heard?”
“Killian…”
“Why are ye still here? I asked yer to leave. Get out!”
Lily saw the veins in his neck stand out, and his harsh tone should have made her run, but she stayed rooted to the spot, her gaze unflinching.
“I am not leaving. We have been through this, and it is not what I wish.”
Killian took a few menacing steps towards her. “What ye wish doesnae matter. I dinnae want ye here.”
“Why?” she challenged, raising her chin in defiance.
“Because everything you said to me the other night was a lie. You are hurt, Killian. An innocent man died because you brought him here… But you did not kill him! Chasing me away would not change that. Waging war on an innocent clan will not change that.”
“Laird McLennan isnae innocent,” Killian answered in a warning tone. “Ye have nay proof.”
“And you have no proof that he is guilty. All you have is the word of a puppet, and he could lie to hide the identity of the real culprit.” When he held her gaze longer, Lily summoned the courage and continued, “Let us find the ledgers, Killian.”
She reached out to touch his hand, her heart hammering in her chest, as she feared he would pull out of her reach. She ached to offer him comfort, but he wouldn’t let her.
Lily smoothed her hand over his arm, down to his fingers, and she held him there when he did not pull away from her.
“Killian…”
“I want ye out of here before it is too late,” Killian whispered, his tone softening this time.
His eyes held hers, and in the next second, his lids slowly fluttered shut, and he drew in a deep breath. Lily moved her hand to his cheek, and he leaned into her touch, sighing out loud again.
“I need ye to go to yer people, Lily,” he said in a strained voice that broke her heart further.
How could she leave him to wage a war on his own? She had no business being here, but she could not bring herself to leave.
“I cannot do that, Killian.” Her words sounded huskier than she intended as he pressed a kiss to the inside of her palm. Her heart pounded now. She could hear the heavy thuds and feel the heat rising through her while her pulse raced.
“Ye have to… I cannae let ye get hurt, and it is impossible to protect anyone right now… I cannae protect ye, Lily. I cannae—”
“I can handle myself, Killian.”
“Ye dinnae understand—”
“I am not leaving you!”
“Ye have to…” Killian tore himself away from her, groaned, and turned around in a circle while shoving his hands raggedly through his hair. “I cannae do this knowin’ ye’re in danger… I cannae breathe when ye’re in danger, Lily… I cannae lose ye too.”
His pain broke her heart, so she went to him, touched his back so he turned around to face her again, and his harsh breath fell on her face.
“I stay, and we fight together,” Lily said, moving her hand to his chest so it rested against his pounding heart. “We protect each other.”
Killian’s gaze searched hers for a long moment before her name left his lips in a pained sigh. He dipped his head and took her lips in the next second, silencing her words, kissing her till she was breathless.
Lily came up for air when he released her lips. She panted and drew closer to him, pressing her needy body against his.
“I cannae… I willnae stop,” Killian growled before taking her lips for another kiss.
“Do not stop,” she urged him just before his tongue swept into her mouth and licked hers.
The kiss was like coming up for fresh air. Killian nibbled on her lower lip, took her tongue, sucked and licked till she shivered with pleasure.
His hands moved to her behind, and he pressed her closer to him so she could feel his hardness. She raised herself on tiptoe, but he lifted her off the ground, wrapped her legs around his waist, and carried her to his desk.
He cleared out his maps and scrolls with one swift move of his hand, placed her on the edge of his desk, and parted her thighs.
“Killian,” Lily moaned when he went down on his knees and pulled down her breeches.
He peeled her clothes off her body before he lowered his face between her thighs and kissed where she ached the most for him.
The first time he had made love to her with his tongue, Lily had been lost. Tonight, she was well aware, burning and wanting to feel not just his tongue, but his hands… his lips.
He kissed her inner thighs, and she cried out before he pushed her down onto the surface so her back pressed against the sturdy wood.
Her toes curled when his tongue licked at her juices. Lily had never felt anything this intense. She shuddered, shoved her fingers into his hair, and cried out his name as many times as she could.
When he brought his lips to hers, she was shaking with need. Killian kissed his way down her neck to her breasts, then he fondled them both before dipping his head to take one nipple in his mouth.
His hands drew her closer to him, and he slid a hand between her legs and stroked her with his thumb.
Killian didn’t let go of her erect nipple as he slid one finger deep inside her. His groan was enough to send her off the edge. Sweat clung to her body, and even the gust of wind leaking into his study from the open window did nothing to quench her heat.
When he finally took her lips again, she attacked his léine, pushed it off his body, and pressed herself wantonly against him,
Her legs wrapped around his waist, and she mumbled words she could barely hear. “Take me, Killian… Make me yours.”
His kiss was like nectar. She was drunk on it. Exquisitely hungry for more of it, aching for his touch.
Killian drew back from her and dropped his kilt to the ground. Lily saw him in the dimly lit room and gasped. She shivered in anticipation of what it would feel like to have him make love to her till they were both complete.
“Lily,” Killian growled when he got back to her again. He slid his fingers into her hair and tipped her head back to get access to her neck.
He kissed his way down her body from there, parted her legs further apart, and gave her one last lick before he withdrew and sheathed himself inside her.
Lily gasped from the pain she felt as his full, throbbing length entered her. Her nails dug into his skin, and his hands squeezed her buttocks, pulling her against him so he slid in some more.
“Oh…”
“Shhh… dinnae move,” Killian growled in her right ear when she failed to obey his words and wriggled her hips against him. “Oh, Lily,” he gasped, then groaned.
She felt him part her, fill her, stretch her. She cried out again when he slowly pulled out and then thrust into her again.
“Say my name,” he said, licking and biting her earlobe.
“Killian,” Lily murmured. “Oh… Killian.”
His thrusts were slow as he took her. It was more than Lily had ever imagined. Their bodies pressed against each other while locked in his study.
The air around them reflected the steam of the moment. Neither cared for their harsh breaths that filled the air or the muffled cries that followed every thrust.
Killian kissed her again, and his hands held her waist steady while he deepened his thrusts, pushing her over the edge with every slow flicker of his tongue on hers and every sweet stroke of his hardness in her dripping core.
When he thrust deeper one last time, she clung to him and cried out, clenching her thighs hard so she could enjoy the spasms that rocked through her body.
Lily felt the warmth of his passion spill into her, but he didn’t slow his thrusts. Her name on his lips was an epiphany. Her body went lax as he finally slowed his thrusts and pushed his hands into her hair to tip her head back for a kiss.
They were still panting a moment later, and her body missed his when he finally turned away. Her eyes stayed shut as he turned away from her. When she looked at him, his shoulders had stiffened, and he put on his clothes without saying a word.
Lily saw the cut on his back then, and she realized he hadn’t treated his wound since they had been attacked the previous day.
“Killian, you are wounded,” she whispered to him. “Your back.”
“It will heal,” Killian answered without looking at her.
Lily jumped to her feet and picked her clothes up from under the desk. Once she slid them on, she tamed her hair with both hands and cleared her throat.
“Killian,” she said, trying to touch him, but he avoided her touch, stepping out of her reach swiftly.
“Go to yer chamber,” Killian answered in a stiff tone, not meeting her eyes.
A chill replaced the warmth that had rocked her world some moments earlier. He ran his hands through his hair and repeated his command, his cold demeanor slicing through her.
Tears in her eyes, Lily swallowed her words and dashed out of his study.
In her chamber, she buried her face in her pillows to muffle the light sobs that wracked her. They had just shared the most insane moment of passion. Wilder than she had ever imagined.
He had made love to her and stolen her heart. So, why had he pushed her away like it had meant nothing to him?