Chapter 23 River
River
Apparently, I don’t enjoy seeing Cleo talking to other lesbians. I’ve never been a person who gets jealous…about anything. It’s not an emotion I’m familiar with, or I wasn’t until yesterday.
Tasha Alcott is a charming pilot, who has no problems getting women.
We’ve never hung out or anything, but the gay scene isn’t very big so inevitably we’ve bumped into each other from time to time on a night out.
She’s never interested me as a bed partner because I think we’re too alike.
I think Kit might have given it a go once or twice, but I’m not one hundred percent sure.
Whatever, that doesn’t matter. What matters is Tasha Alcott was sitting with Cleo in the coffee lounge yesterday afternoon, being her usual charming and tactile self, and I disliked it a lot.
Even more so when it seemed Cleo enjoyed the attention.
I watched Tasha lean in, watched her touch Cleo’s arm, watched Cleo laugh at something she said.
And I hated it. I hated that Tasha was making Cleo laugh.
I hated that Cleo looked comfortable and engaged.
I hated that I couldn’t be the one sitting across from her.
And I hated that I had no right to feel that way. We’ve been on one date. One. I don’t own her. I have no claim on her.
But God, I wanted to.
It didn’t help that we couldn’t meet up last night. Cleo still had an interview to conduct and notes to write up, and I had jobs to finish in the bunk, which would get me one step closer to making up for my past behaviour to my friends.
I think I did a pretty good job of keeping the green-eyed monster at bay…well, in front of other people. When it was just me in my bed, I admit I scowled at the ceiling for a few hours like a petulant kid. Hey, I’m a work in progress.
Today is a new day, though, and I have a date to prepare. In reality I just need to make sure the picnic is still a go, and that my friends are still okay with being on Benson Watch.
The weather is predicted to be sunny all day and cloudless this evening. We’ll still have the wind to contend with, but not having pissing down rain is as good as it gets. I figured out where we can have our picnic, and it’s quite a genius move, even if I do say so myself.
On the starboard side of the ship is a lookout balcony below the main deck, off the main hangar.
We use it to transfer supplies when at sea.
It’s hidden from the bridge and the flight deck, unless someone is purposefully looking over the rail.
I can’t even begin to explain the favours I’ve had to shell out to make it happen, but it means Cleo and I can have some privacy for once, which I’m hoping means a few stolen kisses.
And for that, I’d do a lot more than give favours.
Cleo’s mouth is addictive, and I’ve gone far too long without touching her lips.
My day, however, is rudely turned upside down when I interrupt something I can never un-see or un-hear. So, the thing I was mulling over yesterday about Grey and Benson seems to have been right on the mark, and I couldn’t be less happy to be right for once.
As you can imagine, on a ship the size of the Queen Elizabeth, there are plenty of storage areas and closets filled with shit.
Cleaning supplies, uniforms, etc. Those storage areas are spread all over the ship, so why, oh why, did I happen to open the one which housed a very sweaty and grunting Benson taking Grey from behind over a crate of fabric softener?
Did I manifest it? I mean, what are the fucking odds? Why me?
For a horrifying few seconds, my eyeballs are locked on to Grey’s as she looks behind her. Her eyes go wide, her mouth falls open, and I can see the exact moment she realises what’s happening. That I’ve seen them. That I know.
My stomach lurches. My heart pounds. My hands go numb.
Benson is so far none the wiser as he rails into her.
With absolutely no desire to stick around a millisecond longer, I take a quick step back and close the door. I only came to collect a bottle of washing liquid to replace the one I’d used up yesterday, and now I have that fresh trauma seared into my hippocampus.
My heart is threatening to break out of my chest as I walk away, with no real destination. It’s not just the fact I’ve seen Benson’s bare arse or heard the noise he makes when he’s getting off…or Grey’s startled expression. It’s the impact of what it means.
Benson might not be an officer, but he is a higher rank than Grey.
Fraternisation is banned for a reason, and rightly so.
Thank fuck Cleo is a private citizen, and therefore not in breach of the rules.
I’ll be in the shit if we’re found out, but nowhere near the shitstorm Benson and Grey will face if they’re caught.
Which brings me to my next problem. What the hell do I do with the knowledge?
As far as Benson goes, he deserves whatever he gets, but Grey?
Shit, this will affect her entire career going forward, and let’s be honest, she’ll be raked over the coals way more than Benson by her peers, simply for being a woman.
The Navy isn’t perfect, and yes, there are still some outdated views. God, what a fucking mess.
Oh Jesus, what do I say to Cleo? She’s on the warpath to expose whatever is going on with Benson. If she finds out I had knowledge of this and I didn’t tell her, I can only imagine how pissed she’s going to be.
There’s only one thing to do. I need to rally my troops.
With it only being eight in the morning, all three of them are still sleeping soundly.
Racing towards our bunk, I try to slow my breathing, because at this rate I’m going to have a panic attack.
Plus, I’m slightly worried Benson is going to come after me, so I want to be in the company of other people.
I’m not quiet or subtle when I fall through the cabin door, slamming it shut. Cheddar jerks upright and slams her head on the bunk above her.
“Fuck,” she cries, rubbing her head.
“Romeo, what the actual hell,” Boot calls before burying her head under her pillow.
“Up, now!” I say with authority. “Seriously, this is code red, ladies.”
Kit scrubs her face and sits up, swinging her legs over the side of her bed and looking at me bleary-eyed. “This better not be about you and Cleo. No offence but I can’t deal with your love life this early in the morning.”
“It’s not. I wouldn’t wake you up for that. Kit…this is bad.”
All three women climb out of bed and look at me. I’ve never enacted a code red before, so they understand I’m not dicking about.
“Rome, you look like you’re about to shit yourself. What the hell’s wrong?”
Sweat has formed at the base of my neck. “I caught Benson…” I begin. I trail off because I don’t even know how to make the words leave my mouth.
“Benson?” Boot asks, looking at me and then the others. “What about him?”
“River?” Kit asks, stepping forward and placing both hands on my shoulders. “What happened?”
“IcaughthimfuckingGrey,” I say in one rushed expulsion of air.
“Whoa, slow down and repeat,” Cheddar says, also taking a step towards me. They all look very worried, which is fair.
“Benson…fucking Grey. I caught them,” I choke out.
Kit’s eyebrows disappear, and Cheddar lets out a soft but heady “Fuck me.”
“You’re…you’re sure?” Kit croaks out.
I nod frantically. “Oh, I’m very sure. Grey over a box of washing supplies. Benson imitating a jackrabbit. Very, very sure, and very disturbing.”
“Did Benson see you?”
“No, but Grey did. I got the hell out of there sharpish. What the hell do I do?”
Boot snorts. “You report the bastard. He’s abusing his power, and we all know it.”
I shake my head. Even though I understand her reaction, and I owe Grey nothing whatsoever, I can’t do that to her. “Grey will be crucified,” I reply, looking them all in the eye. “We all know it.”
Cheddar goes back to her bunk and sits down. “As much I detest the woman, Romeo’s right. Her career will never recover.”
“Pfft, maybe she should have thought about that,” Boot scoffs. “Are we forgetting who she is? This is our so-called ‘crewmate’ who would and has dobbed people into the brass for her own gain. Maybe she is sleeping her way up the ladder?”
“Boot,” I caution. “We have no idea what the circumstances are. Yes, she’s not the nicest, but she’s still one of us.”
“So is Benson, technically,” Kit supplies.
“No, he’s not. He’s a man in power, for a start. A man with friends higher up the food chain than Grey. Do you think he’s going to protect her when the shit hits the fan?”
“Not likely,” Cheddar mumbles.
“He’ll throw her to the wolves. Benson would probably get a slap on the wrist or a transfer. Maybe someone will have the gumption to properly discipline him, but on the chance the brass wants a scandal swept under the rug, it will be Grey who’s left with a target on her back.”
Kit blows out a big breath. “I get that, Rome, I really do, but you have a duty to protect the rest of the crew. Their conduct must be reported.”
I chuckle humourlessly. “How can I possibly be the one to do that with what’s going on between Cleo and me?”
“Because it’s the right thing to do,” Cheddar offers softly.
“So far, you’re probably the only one who knows about it, except for us, now,” Boot begins.
“But let’s not forget a particular lovely and voracious reporter who has locked on to Benson and his bullshit.
It’s not going to be long until she gets a whiff of impropriety and the whole thing ends up in a report heading to the bloody admiral. ”
“And I can’t imagine it’s going to go in your favour if she finds out you knew and didn’t tell her,” Cheddar adds on.
“Yeah.” I sigh. “I’ve already thought about that.”
“Okay,” Kit announces with a hand in the air. This is Kit in decision-making mode. “It needs to be reported, but let’s not go running to the captain half-cocked. River, talk to Cleo, explain the situation.”
“And then what?” I ask, because I seriously don’t want to be in charge of this at all.
“Then…we talk to Grey.”
“Sorry, say that again,” Boot shoots.
Kit sinks to her bed. “We need to talk to her. She knows Romeo saw them and is probably expecting her to have already reported it. She’s going to be a mess.”
I laugh. “And you think talking to her is the answer? Us…talking to her?!”
“Actually, it needs to be just you,” Kit winces as she answers.
Cheddar cuts a hand through the air. “No way. Grey could spin it and say River has a personal vendetta against her.”
“That’s what she’ll do regardless,” Boot chimes in. “Think about it. The tension between River and Grey is well known throughout the entire ship. Add Benson to the mix and it’s suddenly not as clear cut as simply reporting an incident.”
“Fucking hell,” I moan.
Kit taps her chin in thought. “Hmm, you’re right. Okay, River, you still need to tell Cleo. If she comes up with evidence of other infractions, it’s going to be a lot harder for Benson to slither his way out of it.”
“I’ll tell her tonight. But Grey could still cause trouble.”
Cheddar rocks her head from side to side in deliberation. “I think she’ll wait. She’s not going to risk exposing herself accidentally.”
“Trust me, she ain’t shy about exposing herself,” I say with a shudder.
“Mate,” Cheddar chuckles, “do you need some bleach for your brain?”
“You have no idea.”
“Well, this was an exciting start to the day,” Boot says, reaching for her workout gear. “Might as well get some PT in. Anyone want to join me?”
“I’m gonna hide in here for the rest of the day,” I say. “If you see Grey or Benson, you can’t let on you know.”
“We got ya, Rome, no worries,” Cheddar says, crawling back into bed.
“I was going to do some laundry today, but it looks like the bunk fairy already sorted it out.” Kit smiles while looking at me.
Shrugging, I wave her off. “I’ve got some making up to do to you guys.”
“River, come on,” Cheddar begins.
“No, I do. You three have been the best friends I could ever have asked for, and we all know you’ve had to go above and beyond to save my arse from myself numerous times. I’m sorry about that, by the way.”
“Jesus, River.” Boot laughs. “Mushy much?”
Boot gets a pair of balled-up socks to the face.