Chapter 6 Hanne #2
Morco took the seat that both Allegra and Krull had vacated.
He had his stew with him, but he let it sit there and cool as he stared at me, arms on the table, the size of his muscles straining the fabric of his shirt.
His eyes were just as intense, but in a very different way from Krull’s.
While they were angry and dangerous, his wrath didn’t seem reserved for me.
His gaze didn’t seem predatory, but protective.
I’d known this man for less than a week, but I somehow felt so close to him.
Felt a friendship whose foundation was built on darkness and fear.
My feelings might not be reciprocated, but I suspected they were.
If not, he wouldn’t sit here with me now, wouldn’t have heard me call his name when I didn’t make a sound.
He said nothing, as if he expected me to speak first.
“Thank you.”
His elbows rested on the table, and his hands came together, big fingers and knuckles, veins on the surface. He massaged one absent-mindedly as he soaked in my gratitude. “I’ll take care of it.”
“No,” I said quickly. “I don’t want a retaliation.”
“There won’t be.”
“But if you say something—”
“I’ll kill him if he bothers you again,” he said. “There will be no retaliation.”
My eyes dropped when I heard him speak, hearing the words of a protector, the likes of which I hadn’t heard in years.
My father had always looked out for me, even when I wasn’t in the room, protected me from fears I never knew about.
I only realized how much he’d done for me after he was gone—when the wolves came in the dark.
This was the first time I’d felt that safety since he died—and in the most unlikely place. “Thank you.”
When the conversation was completed, he grabbed his spoon and stirred his stew before he took his first bite.
I looked past his shoulder and saw that Krull had left the Gathering to prepare the meat. Allegra was still seated at the table with her friends, and she stared right at me. My eyes darted away, and I looked at my own bowl. “You don’t have to sit with me, Morco. I know you have other people.”
He ignored what I said and continued to eat.
I wasn’t sure if he’d heard what I said, but I didn’t repeat it.
“I like the potatoes. You’re right. They’re filling like meat.”
“Yeah.”
“We need to grow as many of these as possible.”
“I collected several dozen seeds, but I imagine only a third of them will make it to the end.”
“Then we’ll return and gather more—and whatever else we can find.”
I wasn’t eager to return to the open darkness, but I would do whatever was required of me. This strange place was home now. I would never see the sunlight again, just remember it in my dreams. “I’ll plant these after breakfast. After that, I’m free to leave whenever you’re ready.”
“I’ll send a group with you this time.”
“As in, you won’t be coming?”
He continued to lean over his bowl and eat. “Is that a problem?”
“No.”
He scooped a spoonful of meat and potato into his mouth and chewed it slowly before he looked past me into the trees. We sat at the last table in the Gathering, so nothing but wilderness was behind me.
“Okay, no. It is a problem.”
He finished his bite then looked at me head on.
“I’m not going out there again without you.” I wasn’t afraid to admit I was scared, had no pride in this new life below the surface. “I know I said you don’t need to do everything yourself, and I feel bad for asking—”
“I’ll go.”
I thought I’d have to tug harder to get what I wanted, maybe even beg, but I didn’t have to do any of those things. “Just like that?”
“Serve my people, I’ll serve you.”
I felt somewhat disappointed by that answer, like I’d expected a more personal reason for his cooperation.
“Thank you.” I hadn’t eaten a bite of my stew since I’d sat down.
It’d gone cold since Allegra had come for me and Krull had tried to proposition me once again. But hot or cold, I would eat anything.
He continued to eat calmly, his eyes either on his food or the nature behind me, his dark eyes vacant, his thoughts a mystery.
His people seemed to respect him, and he maintained distant authority, lonely in his rule.
Of all the tables he could have sat at, he chose to sit at mine, and I didn’t know why.
I looked into my bowl and took a couple bites before I felt his stare. I took a bite and met his look.
His eyes didn’t dart away, set on mine like they were invisibly attached. “You never answered my question.”
“What question is that?”
“That you’re of noble descent.”
“Oh.” I felt like my silence had already answered that question. “Yes.”
His bowl was empty, so his hands came together again, his eyes still locked on mine.
Dark like the ground after a heavy rain, he had a depth deeper than the earth itself.
He could look at me with authority that wasn’t corrupt, an intensity that felt safe rather than threatening.
“Anyone else would have died in that fall. But your bones are hard from the strength of your ancestors, and your will to survive is born from generations of rulership. Your intelligence is born from men smart enough to lead rather than those weak enough to be led. I noticed the branches when we met, but now I see the roots of your mighty oak.”
I remained still and breathed, soaking up the words that no one else had ever spoken.
If only he knew how I’d squandered what had been in my blood for generations, how I’d handed the keys of my kingdom to the enemy within.
“I don’t deserve your praise. Not when I was banished from my throne and exiled to eternal darkness. ”
He continued his piercing stare, like he wanted more of my story but refused to ask outright. He was in a position to take whatever he wanted from me but chose to give instead. He gave me the protection I asked for, sustenance in my stomach, and a friendship that meant more than everything else.
“It’s a long story.”
“Every tale is. Otherwise, it’s not a story at all.”
“Yeah,” I said as I swallowed. “My father was King of Baccara, and he ruled for decades. He died a few years ago, and the crown was in limbo during that time. The Ring of Elders had temporary rule until I came of age. But they refused to give me the crown unless I married.” This was the hardest part of the story, a tale of my utter stupidity.
The memory of the humiliation nearly brought tears to my eyes.
I didn’t like to think of my father anymore, not when I assumed he was ashamed of my negligence.
“So I did. I let him manipulate me. I let him take the crown. I let him take the keys to my kingdom. And when I fought back…he got rid of me.” He got everything he wanted, everything he’d planned for since the beginning. And I just let him have it.
I wanted to share the story of my life with Morco because he’d earned my trust, but it was just too hard when it was so raw.
He didn’t ask for clarification of my vagueness, didn’t press for more details so it would make sense.
He accepted what I gave him and didn’t ask for more.
“You want to return to the surface so you can kill him.”
“I couldn’t kill him even if I wanted to.” He’d cut off my head before I could even unsheathe my sword. He was bigger and stronger than me, and while I was younger and more agile, it still wasn’t enough. “But it doesn’t matter anyway since there’s no way out of here.”
I found a plot of unused land in which to start my garden. It was small, but it was all I needed for the moment. If we were to expand, we would have to remove the nearby trees and till the soil. Their gardening tools were limited, so I had to do most of it by hand.
I planted the seeds in the dim light of the fire and marked the area so everyone would know what it was.
With a pail of water that I’d fetched from the well, I watered the area slightly, knowing these types of crops liked moist dirt.
I compacted the soil and hoped the conditions would be enough to make them grow and provide a decent harvest.
When I was done, I washed my hands and removed the dirt from underneath my fingernails before I returned to my cabin. When I neared the little home that was now my own, I noticed Morco approach.
My heart did a little whirlwind at the sight of him, the only source of joy in this dark place. I didn’t have to watch my back in his presence, not when he did it for me. Not when he was the single person I trusted here.
“We’ll leave in the morning. Caius and a few others are coming with us.”
“Okay. I planted the seeds in the garden. If we’re lucky, we’ll have to expand the area to accommodate more crops.”
He gave a slight nod then looked away. He was nearly a foot and a half taller than me, muscular despite the lean diet everyone was forced to adopt.
And he had a quiet sadness to him that you could see as clearly as words on a page.
Allegra had said they were together, but he seemed too miserable to have love burning in his heart. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
I didn’t want him to go. Didn’t want to enter my cabin alone without the company of people or books.
Everyone else here was a stranger who could stab me in the back if I dropped my guard.
I’d been lonely at the castle and I was lonely still, but I somehow felt it less when I was in his presence.
But I bottled all those thoughts instead of dumping them on someone who wouldn’t know what to do with them. “See you then.”
He turned away first and headed down the path between the cabins. He disappeared a moment later, and I wasn’t sure which cabin was his.
I didn’t know if Allegra had been honest about her relationship with Morco, but if she had, did they live together? I didn’t know because I didn’t know where he slept at night. I didn’t know if he slept alone.
I didn’t know if he felt as alone as I did.