The Desire

Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty-One

REMINGTON

T he moment we walk into the ballroom, I can feel the sweat running down my back. My eyes scan the room as I do every time I enter one, especially an event as big as this. I knew that there would be plenty of people wanting to get that photo of Flynn to share with friends or waiting for him to do something newsworthy.

There is only one official event photographer allowed in the room, but with cameras in every phone in the room, nobody is safe from the gossip anymore.

Cherie leans closer to tell me, “If this was a real date, I would say you were really trying to impress me. This place is very glamorous.”

“Oh, this couldn’t be further from a date if we tried. Didn’t I mention I brought you here as my secret bodyguard? Just in case either Flynn or El want to murder me tonight. And both of those scenarios are in the cards, let me assure you.” Both of us laugh as we make our way across the room to where Forrest is standing at our table, but there’s no sign of Flynn. I know he’s here because his security detail messaged me to say that they had safely gotten him into the building without too much difficulty. Lots of photos, but thankfully, he managed to keep his mouth shut, and that is a miracle.

“Evening.” Forrest first looks at me sternly, raising his eyebrows in a signal of what the hell is going on, not expecting for me to be here with a woman that isn’t Elouise. But his manners get the better of him, and he turns to look at Cherie but is speaking to both of us.

“Hey, buddy. Forrest Taylor, this is my friend, Cherie Knight.”

It takes a second and then realization dawns on him who she is. “As in Cherie from this morning’s talk. That Cherie?” He’s confused but at least doesn’t look so pissed off with me now.

“I see my reputation has preceded me. Hello, Forrest.” Cherie holds out her hand to shake his.

“You could say that.” He laughs a little as he shakes her hand. “I just wasn’t expecting to meet you so soon.”

I shake my head. “No time like the present. Get it all out on the table in one day. Because as much as Nic keeps telling me it’s messy, I fucking hate messy.” I put my hand on Forrest’s shoulder, thanking him for not making Cherie feel uncomfortable.

“I’ll drink to that.” Lifting two empty glasses off the table and reaching for the champagne bottle, Forrest pours us each a glass, and the three of us make a toast for less mess in our lives after tonight.

I spot Flynn across the room talking to a group of businessmen and women that I recognize as the staff from the external law firm we use. He is laughing and looks relaxed, which is a good start. Like we all knew he would, he has bounced back and is ignoring the whole thing, publicly that is, but it’s behind closed doors I worry about him.

Leaning down, I whisper into Cherie’s ear, “That guy over there to your left, the one in the middle of the crowd, owning the conversation, is Flynn. The king of attention. Think you can break him?”

Both of us chuckle as she answers, “Never met a man I couldn’t break. Challenge accepted.” As the words leave Cherie’s mouth, I can feel eyes on me, and my body is on alert.

Elouise is in the room, I can sense it.

Turning to look toward the door, it feels like my heart has stopped beating.

Fuck me!

My lady in red.

A strapless dress is tightly fitted over every curve of her breasts and hips, all the way down her body until halfway down her thighs. The hem of the dress is curved on the front, lowering as it wraps around to the back of the dress. Sparkling netting is softly gathered and falls all the way to the floor from that seam. I try so hard to kickstart my heart, but the only part of my body I can feel moving is my cock that is now hard as rock and reminding me what I have been missing.

Our eyes meet, and I feel her anxiety rising rapidly from here, but something isn’t right. Even with all the makeup, I can tell the color is draining from her face, and the anxiety is turning to fear as her body starts to sway slightly.

Shit.

My legs are moving on instinct because I know this is about to end badly.

Shoving people to the side as I’m trying to get to her, I can see her starting to faint and falling toward the ground. It’s happening in slow motion, and it’s like there isn’t a sound in the room I can hear.

Nic and Tori have their backs to her, greeting the organizers who have been positioned just inside the doors all night.

There is no mistaking my heart beating now as my legs power me across the floor. I lunge to just get my hand under her head before it hits the floor, rolling her toward me so that she partially lands on me. I don’t wait to check she is okay, just push to my feet and sweep her into my arms. I’m out the door as I hear the commotion erupt behind me. Tori is screaming Lou’s name, and Nic holds her back, yelling to me he’ll find help.

I don’t need it! I just need some privacy.

One of my men is by my side as I stride from the room, and he points me to a room down the corridor. Pushing the door open, he hits the light switch for me and then closes the door behind him, and I know he will position himself right outside the door.

Then there is a voice of someone who is arguing with him, but I can’t pay attention. I’m too busy laying El down on a couch. This is the room they must use for a wedding party to wait in before they enter their reception dinner. There are long counters and mirrors with strips of lights above them on the wall and plenty of comfortable seats around.

“El, wake up, baby, you need to wake up.” She is clammy and still so pale. I need to find water or something, but I’m not leaving her. I’m never leaving her again. This is all my fault. Why was I so stupid? I should never have walked away. I should’ve just told her the truth that day.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” I can’t help it, I give her what she needs, my touch. Just like she calms my soul, I know I calm hers too. Being apart has turned the world upside down for both of us. Leaning down, I kiss her lips so softly, just willing her to open her eyes for me.

Her eyelids start to flutter a little, her body moving slightly.

The faintest whisper comes from her lips. “Rem…”

My hands are on either side of her face as those beautiful brown eyes start to focus on me properly. “I’m here, El, I’m right here. I’m not leaving.” My thumb strokes her cheek, and I can see the color returning a little as she wakes up.

Kissing her forehead gently, I pull back to look her in the eyes again, when the door opens, and all I hear behind me is a voice still arguing with my guy on the door.

“I told you I’m a doctor, she needs to be checked, and they know me.”

And then Tori’s voice comes booming into the room. “If you want to keep your job, then I suggest you move aside.”

I know my man won’t move unless I tell him to--or one other person whose voice is then calmly speaking in the corridor. Nic.

“It’s fine. We just need a moment. Thanks, Darren.” Of course, Nic knows his name. He remembers every one of his staff. He has never mentioned it, but I know his memory is almost as good as mine, and that’s saying something when I have a photographic memory.

Dr. Keats then comes storming into the room, and I swear if he touches her, I don’t know if I’ll be able to hold back from putting him on his ass.

I stand and place my body between them. “Stop right there.” The tone of my voice tells him I’m not joking.

“Move, Rem, and let Drew check her out,” Tori yells at me, but I haven’t moved and neither has he.

“Not happening. I’m taking care of my girlfriend.” I cross my arms over my chest and feel her hand touching my leg ever so gently.

Even when she is half out of it, El is still trying to be the calm in my storm.

“Good for you. Now move, so both my girlfriend, who is also a doctor, and I can check on Elouise and make sure it’s just a simple fainting spell. You’re lucky she keeps some supplies in her car.” Drew stands up in front of me, not backing down, as a woman I’ve never seen before, dressed in her evening dress, comes into the room carrying a doctor’s bag.

“Girlfriend?” I growl, looking at Tori who shrugs sheepishly at me.

“Well, it worked. Someone had to push you to stand up and tell the world you were together.”

Nic looks down at Tori, and I can tell he wants to kill her as much as I do right now.

“We will be discussing this later,” I say, glaring at Tori and stepping to the side but only enough that I’m now at the side of the couch and leaning over, holding on to El’s hand.

“Oh God, did you think I was here for Elouise? Damn, Remington, I knew from that first meeting she was off limits. The way you looked at her and spoke to me, it was a clear message of back the fuck off. It was obvious she was never just your nanny. Still, I called her when you weren’t around to make sure, but it was obvious she had no interest in me. Christ, you were at every appointment after that initial one, even though you said you wouldn’t be, and didn’t move more than a foot away from her. And I’m thankful because then I met Paulini soon after.” Who is already on her knees next to El and talking to her in hushed tones.

“I’m so confused.” El is looking up to me from the couch.

“You and me both, baby, you and me both.”

Everyone then just remains silent while Paulini and Drew check over El who is now sitting up and sipping some water slowly.

The last few days are streaming through my thoughts. It's all piecing together now.

Freaking Tori and her interference were the catalyst for all this derailing. But although I’m frustrated and still must fix this, I can’t be mad at her. She’s right. We needed a push, and in true Tori style, she just used the biggest bulldozer she could find.

“Elouise appears fine, perhaps just a dip in her blood sugar or a panic attack. Just needs to take it easy and perhaps see your doctor for a full checkup to be sure.” Paulini stands while Drew is packing up her doctor bag and then rises to his feet and places his arm around her waist.

“Thank you both, and my apologies for the way I acted. It seems there was a misunderstanding on my part.” I put my hand out to shake both of theirs, and by this stage, Tori is sitting next to her best friend, and it looks like they are arguing in whispers.

“I’ll take Elouise home now so she can rest.” And while both doctors are nodding at me, behind me, I hear both female voices in unison.

“No!” El sounding very determined.

“Yes!” Tori using her bossy voice, trying to make her point too.

“Good luck with that,” is all I get from Drew before he leans forward and quietly in my ear tells me that she is okay to stay for the night if El feels up to it. They are here and will keep an eye on her. Then he steps away and leaves the room with Paulini.

It’s then that I look at Nic who has been silently standing to the side of the commotion, and without saying a word, he knows what I need him to do.

Walking to Tori, he takes her hand, not giving her a choice to stand up.

“Time to go back to the dinner and see if we can get through the rest of the night without any more attention on us.” The way he looks down at Tori, I know that is his way of warning her to be on her best behavior for the rest of the night. “Do you think you can manage that, my crazy one.”

Reluctantly, she blows a kiss to Elouise and playfully slaps Nic on his chest. “Whatever do you mean?” Both of them laugh as they walk out, and Nic closes the door behind him.

The air in the room starts to feel heavy, and my mind is racing.

From behind me there is a fragile voice from the woman I love, and her question is a good place to start.

“Who is she, Rem? And why is she here?” Tears are welling in her eyes, and I don’t want her to pass out on me again from feeling so anxious. I caused that panic attack, and I feel like such an idiot for letting this go this far.

Moving quickly, I sit next to her, lifting her up and placing her in my lap. I need her close and to be able to stop her from running if she panics.

“Bold of you to assume I’m ready to touch you.” Trying her best to be brave, El sits up, tall and rigid.

“Stupid of you to think I can’t tell that you need to be touching me as much as I need to be holding you.” Kissing her cheek, I’m laughing on the inside at her trying so hard to dismiss me, yet her body is slowly softening into mine.

Not waiting any longer, I start.

“That woman out there is Cherie, a woman I should have told you about months ago, the first night you moved into my home. I knew then that there was no way I could walk away from you, and I should have been honest from the beginning.”

“Yes, you should have.” Turning her face, she looks me straight in the eye.

“But you have to know deep down she’s not a prostitute, and I would never cheat on you, and with a hooker of all people. Come on, El, do you truly think that low of me?” There is still hurt there that she jumped to that conclusion, but we can work on that later.

“I’m sorry. It was stupid, but why couldn’t you just have told me? You have to admit it looked sleazy, that place you went to. Running off whenever things got too tough emotionally between us and openly admitting you were going to see a woman I had never heard of. And then I see you walk into a building next to a strip club that is obviously far from a club and looks like I imagine a brothel would look. Then when I challenge you on it, you say nothing… and walk away.” Nothing is holding back the tears now, and they run freely down her cheeks.

“Please don’t cry, baby. I promise it’s nothing like that.” Taking the pocket square from my suit, I dab her face, trying not to ruin her makeup that she has obviously worked hard on for tonight. “I know this is going to sound crazy, but Cherie is a counsellor that I have been seeing for over ten years on and off. The way she runs her sessions with me is through us boxing together, and she makes me spill everything that is trapped inside my head while I’m busy trying to stop my body from being hurt. She is a kickass woman who has worked hard in life to get where she is and gives so much to the street kids in that area, trying to teach them a better life than drugs and street gangs. That’s why the gym is located in that part of town.” Before I can keep going, she starts firing questions at me.

“You box with a woman, like hit her? I know you, Rem, you could never hurt a woman. How do you cope with that? How does that even work, talking and boxing at the same time? You know, like mentally, how does it help you?” El is almost running out of breath trying to ask everything that is circling in that beautiful brain of hers.

“We have plenty of time to talk all this through, but I want to make sure you understand this. I have never slept with Cherie, never wanted to, never thought of it. I’ve never kissed her, and if I did, it would feel like kissing a sister. Also, I haven’t slept with another woman since that night in Rome where you seduced me and stole my heart. I never told you, but I knew that night that you were meant to be mine. I just didn’t know how to make that happen without both our worlds falling down around us. But the universe handed me the answer in a sweet dark-haired little boy who then made us fall in love with him.”

The relief in her eyes and the way her body has now completely molded against mine, I can feel the world starting to spin in the right direction again.

“But you haven’t been honest with me either,” I say. “You pushing me away all the time has more to it than worrying about Blaise, Flynn, and the rest of our friends. What is holding you back from really being with me?”

She sighs, knowing she needs to tell me but still not really wanting to say it. I know the feeling; today has been so draining emotionally, baring my soul.

“A guy named Keith that I met the summer before I started college. We got quite close, and he wanted to go backpacking around the world and for me to forget about becoming a teacher. Of course, you know I’m not that adventurous and teaching was my dream, but I thought I was falling in love, so I was torn. In the end I told him I couldn’t go with him, and that’s when he told me that I would never amount to anything much and I should go off and live my boring life in the suburbs. That’s where I obviously belong.” The water in her eyes tells me it still hurts. “But after a while, I thought he was right, because I was happy in my life, so I found my place. Then the whirlwind of Nic and Tori happened, and the next thing I know, I’m in a world I don’t belong in and never will. This dress might make me look like Cinderella at a ball, but at midnight, I will always turn back into the boring teacher I am meant to be. You need a woman who belongs in your world.”

My heart is aching for her. She has no idea how far from the truth that is.

“Baby, you belong in all those worlds, yours and mine, and I’m going to prove it to you so you can see how amazing you truly are. Don’t ever put yourself in a box like that. Because as high as you build your walls, I will always break through them.” I kiss her on the forehead as I continue what I need to say.

“We hurt each other by keeping secrets, and that needs to stop. Later tonight when you are lying in my arms in our bed, totally satisfied after multiple orgasms, we have lots to talk through, but right now, there is only one important thing I need to tell you.”

I lift her chin up from where her head is now burrowed into my shoulder. “I love you, El. Not just the normal love. That deep gut-wrenching kind of love where I know if I can’t be with you then I can’t survive.” I kiss her on each cheek and then hover my lips above hers. “The forever kind of love.”

Finally, I kiss her like I have been dying to do for days.

It’s not soft or smooth. I wrap my hand behind her neck and press her so tightly to me that our kiss is rough and frantic, both our bodies wanting more. The moment her lips part with a slight lustful groan, my tongue delves into her, and I make sure she knows how desperate I am to have her.

What started as a sweet declaration has turned into a hot, heated, claiming kiss. One that I should have saved for later at home, but I can’t hold back now.

The moment her hands are in my hair and those red-painted nails scraping on my scalp, I know there is no way we are making it out of this room without me being inside her. Just once is all I need to remind her where her home is, wrapped around me while I make her see stars.

Pulling my mouth from hers, she’s gasping, but I can see the fire in her eyes, and that is enough for me.

I’m about to move her from my lap, but she has other ideas. “I love you.” She slides her hands to my beard, tugging at it like she loves to do, knowing it drives me crazy. “God, it feels so good to say that. I love you so much, and I trust you. I honestly do. Now fuck me, right here, right now. I can’t wait.”

My hands are on her waist, ready to lift her to stand, but the moment she is halfway up, she throws her leg over my lap and straddles me on the couch. There is red tulle everywhere between us, but El knows what she wants, and she is taking it. She pushes all of the dress out of the way and pulls my zipper down, popping the button, and my cock is in her hands before I have time to say a word. She rocks her body over my cock that is about to explode at the feel of lace on my skin, and her moan is all it takes for me to erupt with a loud guttural groan and assume control.

“You want to be my bad girl, don’t you.” My hands find hers under the dress and push them out of the way, feeling lace covering her bare pussy. With one finger, I move it to the side, and straight away, I thrust two fingers inside her. “God, so fucking wet for me, you dirty thing. It’s getting you off just thinking about riding my cock and the danger of someone walking in on us, isn’t it?”

“Mhmm, yesss.” She’s trying to talk in her quivering voice, but every time I push down on her clit with my thumb, she bites down on her bottom lip.

Taking my cock in my other hand, I pull my fingers out. I don’t give her time to take a breath as she rises above me, and I thrust up with my hips and impale her on top of me.

I want to scream out her name, but this is just between us. No one else. I will not embarrass her any more than has happened already.

“Not a word. You take me hard, take it all, and hold your screams inside.” Both my hands are on her waist now and holding on tight as she rides me just like she wants.

“That’s it, baby, let it all go. But you can’t scream. The only release you are allowed is coming so fucking hard that I can feel it running all over my balls.” God, I want her beautiful tits in my mouth, but they are strapped in tight in this temptress dress that is doing its job and driving me wild. I need to mark her. Pulling her body closer, I move my mouth to the bare skin of her shoulder, desperate to sink my teeth in.

“Don’t. You. Dare,” El grinds out between me pounding up into her.

“Then come so I can let go deep inside you. One way or another I’m marking you as mine, and you get to choose which way it’s happening.” I growl out the words like a feral animal, and it’s enough to have El throwing her head back, mouth open, and the hands that were on the back of the couch are now in my hair, pulling on it hard. It’s all I need, and I come so fucking hard inside her.

The moment she falls forward onto me, her head on my shoulder and my arms wrapped so tightly around her back, I can feel my heart beating a steady rhythm again. The one that tells me I have control, and now I know what I need to do to keep it in my life.

To love El with all that I am and never let anything come between us.

Simple.

Thank God there is a bathroom in here so we could both clean ourselves up and look presentable enough that no one will know that I just fucked her within an inch of her life. Well, that’s what it felt like for me.

Standing at the door of the room, her hand in mine, I’ve never seen her look more beautiful in my life.

“You sure you’re ready to do this?” I ask, giving her the last chance to let me take her home. We sat and talked for a little while before she insisted that she was going back into that ballroom, head held high and showing how strong she can be, not letting a little fainting spell hold her back. And of course, she is not leaving without meeting Cherie, because apparently, they have a lot to discuss. I should be worried, but I’m really not. I want El to ask every question she has and give Cherie the chance to show El what an awesome person she is.

“I want a second chance at my Cinderella moment, and don’t you dare take that away from me. I mean, I think we can safely say I have claimed my prince, but I need to clear away a few things before I turn back into the pumpkin.” I can’t help but laugh as I open the door, and Darren steps to the side. I see a slight blush on her cheeks, wondering how much he heard. I can tell her he heard everything but he will never repeat it to a soul, but she doesn’t need to know that.

As we walk back down the corridor, I lean down and whisper to her.

“You know that’s not how the story goes, right? Cinderella is not the pumpkin, and I am far from a prince.”

I missed the soft little giggle that slips from her lips.

“Yeah, but it’s my story, and I get to make up the ending my way.” Smiling up at me, she squeezes my hand that little bit tighter as we stop outside the ballroom doors.

Both of us simultaneously take a deep breath, standing that little bit taller and edging closer.

“I heard the word messy being thrown around to describe us.” She squeezes my hand as tight as she can then pushes on the door before I can, announcing to me as she drags me through it, “Well, I love being messy with you—dirty, bad, and oh so messy.” She smiles at me with fire in her eyes, and I’m thankful that my jacket is covering my pants because my cock is ready to make her messy again and again.

Seeing everyone looking at us as we head across the now fully seated room, I try to work out how quickly I can make an excuse for us to leave. I’m feeling very anti-social now.

Looking for Flynn, I find him at our table. He looks up and sees us holding hands, smiles, and goes straight back to talking to Cherie. But what really throws me is the way Forrest is seated on the other side of her, looking at her the same way that Flynn is.

Oh, the man-whisperer has them both under her spell, and I hope like hell I don’t have to pull them apart later. I laugh to myself. How does the saying go? “Not my circus, not my monkeys.”

I have enough in my life to focus my attention on. I don’t need to add someone else’s to it.

The moment we arrive at the table, Tori is up and wrapping El in her arms, scolding her for not going home but also glad to see her. Especially now that she has her twinkle back in her eye and the most beautifully just-fucked blush on her cheeks. Some secrets are worth keeping when it’s just between us.

Cherie stands tentatively and walks around to us with a look I have never seen on her face. But my gentle girlfriend doesn’t surprise me one bit when she reaches out and hugs her with pure kindness and compassion for how Cherie must be feeling. As they finally pull apart, El is smiling and has Cherie’s hands in hers.

“I’m sorry for thinking the worst, please forgive me.” Cherie is shaking her head, trying to tell her there is no need for this, but I know my El, and she doesn’t have a mean bone in her body. She needs to make things right. “I want to thank you for taking such good care of him. He’s a complex soul, and I know this is old news for you, but I’m learning now too.”

“If that is the polite way of saying he is a big pain in the ass, then I agree.”

Both women look at me and then burst out laughing together.

“I knew this was a mistake. One I’m going to regret for years to come, I’m sure.”

I pull the chair out for El to sit next to me, but she brushes my hand aside. “You can bet on that. Now swap seats, all you guys. Cherie is with Tori and me tonight. We have a lot to discuss and to get to know our new friend. Right, ladies?”

And within seconds, Tori has the table rearranged so that Cherie is sitting between her and El. Nic sits next to Tori, and I’m on the other side of El, and next to me is Flynn with Forrest beside him. There are two empty seats which I’m guessing were for Drew and Paulini, but I can see they are sitting over on our lawyers’ table now. I’ll thank whoever arranged that later.

Tonight is just about my circle. The people at this table who I owe everything to.

El places her hand over mine on the table, and although I’m not sure how much affection I should show in front of Flynn just yet, he takes the worry straight from my mind.

“Just want you to know I’m happy for you. I see it now. You’re her penguin.”

I look at him, wondering what he means.

“You know, penguins, they mate for life. She’s your penguin, Rem.”

I turn to look back at El, laughing and smiling like she is right where she belongs.

“Yeah, buddy, she’s my penguin.”

And the warmth of that thought moves through every cell in my body.

Then, in true Flynn style, the moment is broken with his voice in my ear. “Now tell me, where the fuck did you find Cherie? She’s fucking dynamite, and why have you been hiding her from us?”

Yep, this is about to get fucking messy! And I wouldn’t want it any other way.

Well, maybe if I could just ask for a controlled mess, but I know I’m kidding myself. Time to learn the new normal in life. And as long as El and Blaise are right beside me, I’ll take it.

Bring it on, universe.