Chapter 15
CHAPTER 15
NICOLE
The following week, Atticus told me he had to go to the city for the day. Made sense since he was this close, rather than in L.A. He’d left in the wee hours of the morning and had likely only gotten a few hours of sleep.
We’d been here now for twelve days, and this felt more normal with each day that passed. It was hard to believe we’d be parting ways soon. I’d grown attached to having him around, and I wasn’t ready for it to end.
With Atticus gone today, the afternoon dragged. Mimi slept for most of it, so I did everything I could to keep myself busy and sane. I cleaned the kitchen from top to bottom and took a quick drive out to the coffee shop, checking in periodically on her via the app on my phone. That fifteen minutes out and about was like heaven after being stuck in the house most days.
More than anything, I found myself missing Atticus, which was disconcerting to say the least, considering he’d only been gone a few hours. It felt like all the work I’d done to try to get over him these past few years was slowly coming undone. I missed his coffee in the morning. I missed anticipating his return from the store. I missed his smell. His laugh. And the sweet way he spoke to Mimi. He’d be back tonight, and I knew I’d wait up if it turned out he came back late.
As if the universe knew I was going stir crazy, later that afternoon, there was a knock on Mimi’s door.
When I opened, I found Atticus’s beautiful niece, Kenzie, standing there, the sunlight casting a glow on her strawberry blond hair.
“Hi, Nicole.” She smiled. “I hope it’s okay that I stopped by.”
“Oh my gosh, Kenzie. It’s so good to see you.” I opened my arms and gave her a hug.
She squeezed me. “It’s been so long.”
“I know.” I waved. “Come in. Please.”
Kenzie had grown into such a beautiful woman. She looked just like her dad, Brian, with the same color hair and complexion. Both Tina and Atticus had dark hair, but the only one of Tina’s kids who looked like the Marchetti side was the youngest, Kyle. Kieran, Kenzie’s twin, also resembled their dad.
Kenzie looked around the small living area. “Am I disturbing you?”
“No. Not at all. Actually, I’m happy for the company. I was going a little bonkers all alone today. Well, Mimi is here, of course, but she’s catching up on sleep. She must’ve not slept well last night.”
“How is Mimi?”
“She’s good most days, all things considered.”
“Where’s my uncle?”
“He went to the city for the day. He should be back tonight.”
She looked over at the photos on the wall. “I see.”
“I’m glad you came by, though,” I said. “I haven’t talked to you in a long time.” I led the way. “Let’s go in here so we can chat.”
We walked past Mimi’s room into the kitchen.
“Can I get you something to drink?”
She took a seat. “Do you have any wine?”
Her question gave me pause, because the last time we were together, I was pretty sure she wasn’t quite legally able to drink. But she was most definitely old enough now. “Absolutely I do.” I smiled. “Is red okay?”
“That’s perfect.”
“That’s your uncle’s favorite. So that’s what we have.” I took out a bottle and poured us each a glass.
I handed her one and sat down across from her. “It feels weird to be drinking wine with you.”
“Yeah, well, a lot of time has passed, hasn’t it?”
“Are you still living at your mom’s?” I asked.
“Kieran and I have an apartment in town now. Kyle is the only one still living at home.”
I took a sip. “What are you, twenty-three now?”
“Twenty-four.” She sighed. “Yup. Getting old.”
“Hush…” I laughed, gliding my finger along the stem of my glass. “Listen, I just want to get something out of the way.”
“Okay…”
“I feel really guilty for not communicating with you all this time. What happened between Atticus and me wasn’t your fault, and you shouldn’t have had to pay for it. I’m sorry I didn’t keep in touch after he and I split.”
Kenzie shook her head. “Everyone in the family understands why you had to leave. And what happened was very difficult for all of us to accept at first.”
“I know. I just…I’ve missed you. Your mom, too. And your brothers. All of you. You were my family. And I’m sorry.”
“I did always see you as a big sister. I’m not gonna lie. It was difficult. But I never blamed you, you know?”
“Do they all hate me deep down? Your mom and the boys?”
“For what?”
“Any number of things. Not sticking by Atticus. And…well, I’m sure you heard about Julian and me, right?” I hated bringing it up, but I owed her the truth at this point.
“That was definitely surprising. Out of all the men in the world, I don’t understand why you had to choose him, but…”
I could see disappointment in her eyes.
“Your reaction is fair. I know it seems hard to believe.” I paused. “Julian found me in a very bad state one night. He wasn’t trying to pursue me. We literally ran into each other in the city. Nothing turned romantic between us for a long time.” I took a long sip of wine. “Then I heard some rumors about your uncle. It shouldn’t have bothered me so much, because we were divorced, but it did. It still felt like a betrayal, even if I knew my leaving was what had caused him to spiral. During that time, I became closer to Julian. He cared about me, and in some ways, I grew to care about him. But if I’m being honest, I knew I was only with him to try to forget about Atticus.”
She nodded. “Are you still with Julian?”
“No.” I shook my head. “I ended things.”
“How did he take it?”
“Not well. He says he fell in love with me and wants me to consider getting back together. He came to Monksville to try to talk me into giving things a second chance. Atticus and he got into it last week.”
“Oh my gosh. What a mess.”
“Atticus tracked him down at the bar, and things got a bit ugly. Thankfully, no one got hurt.”
“Well, Julian may care for you, but he should know that you and Atticus are soulmates. The fact that you’re not together doesn’t change that.”
My eyes widened. She seemed completely confident in what she’d said. Maybe that’s why I could never seem to feel at peace—because life had ripped me away from my soulmate, and every day since had been about trying to find my way back to him. “The truth is, Kenzie, I live with a lot of regret about how I handled the situation. I’m not proud of it. There are many things I would do differently, if I could go back in time.”
“Like what?”
“For one, I wouldn’t have allowed my fear of Atticus’s fame to control my actions.”
“I never understood why you didn’t trust him.”
“I think I have some trauma that I haven’t dealt with when it comes to my father.”
“What do you mean?”
I sighed. “My dad cheated on my mother. It had been going on for years, and we had no idea. I’d always believed I came from the happiest family, that it was safe and sacred. That my parents were so in love that nothing could ever break that bond. When we found out, it was quite a gut punch. It felt like my entire life had been a lie. My hero turned out to be a fraud. I found that out around the time Atticus and I got married, so I’d lived most of my life believing my dad was a stand-up guy.”
“Atticus would never cheat on you.”
I nodded. “Strangely, in the years we’ve been apart, as I see how badly our separation has affected him, I do believe that now.” I shook my head as I felt a teardrop fall.
“Well…” She sighed. “No matter what happens, I’m always here for you, Nicole. And I hope now that we’ve broken the ice, you and I can stay in touch.”
“I would love that, Kenzie. Truly.” I wiped my eyes. “Enough about me. What’s going on with you ?”
She shrugged. “I’m just trying to figure out life. Photojournalism wasn’t exactly the wisest major for getting a job.”
Kenzie was so smart. She’d run track in high school and earned a full scholarship to Boston University, my alma mater.
“What have you been doing in the meantime?”
“Wedding photography.” She rolled her eyes.
“What’s wrong with that?”
“There’s nothing wrong with it. It just feels like a waste of my skills. It’s always the same thing. But I have to say, it really pays the bills and then some. I’ve been continuously booked.”
“Well, that’s awesome. At least you’re getting paid.”
“But if I could do it on the side and have a main gig at a newspaper or something, that would be ideal. The best of both worlds. I wouldn’t mind getting to travel.”
“Well, don’t give up on that, if it’s your dream.” I shook my head at the grown woman in front of me. “Can I just say how proud of you I am? As someone who’s known you since you were a little girl?”
Kenzie smiled, but my phone rang, interrupting our conversation. When I saw it was Mimi’s caretaker, I picked up right away. “Hey, Louise.”
“Hi, this is Lynn, actually, Louise’s daughter.”
Something about her sullen tone brought dread to my gut. “Oh, hello. Is everything okay? I’ve been waiting for your mother to confirm that she’ll be back in a couple of days as planned? I’d tried to call her, but—”
“I’m really sorry, but I’m afraid I’m calling with some bad news.”
My heart sank. “What happened?”
“My mother had a heart attack on the ship two days ago. And I’m sorry to say…” Lynn hesitated. “She passed away.”