Chapter 41
KABIR
Kabir stood in the wings as the young band, the ones opening for them tonight, played their hearts out.
The air around him vibrated with energy, his and that of the others.
His own band was buzzing beside him, adrenaline humming beneath their skin, the kind that made your skin feel too tight for your body.
But Kabir couldn’t feel any of it. His entire focus was on the hand in his. He tightened his grip on Tani’s fingers and squeezed. Once. Twice. Thrice.
Her fingers fluttered in his palm but then she squeezed back. Once. Twice. Thrice.
His heart nearly split open, joy spilling out of it and making it feel like it would explode out of his chest. He didn’t know what was coming in the future but whatever it was, he was ready.
The opening band hit their final chord, wrapping up their set and the next announcement boomed across the stadium. The crowd roared at the sound of their band’s name, the noise, an ocean rising to swallow them whole.
And then it was time.
He let go of her reluctantly, every cell in his body screaming at the loss of her warmth. He took one step toward the entrance and stopped, looking back.
Tani grabbed his shirt, fisted it and yanked him back. Her mouth crashed onto his.
Kabir froze for a single, stunned heartbeat. Then he was kissing her back, desperate, graceless, pouring every unspoken word and buried feeling into her. Love, longing, apology, devotion, every piece of himself he’d failed to give her in daylight, he gave to her in the shadows.
The kiss stole the air from his lungs and the world narrowed to the taste of her, the grip of her hands, the thundering of his pulse.
Catcalls and wolf whistles rose behind them, Ayaan, Malik, the rest of the band even the assistants revelling in the drama.
Tani pulled back slowly, her breath trembling against his cheek. Her lips were swollen, her eyes blazing with something fierce and fragile.
Kabir brushed his thumb over her mouth, smiling softly. “See you on the other side, Bug,” he murmured.
And then he stepped out. The spotlight hit him like a physical force, white, hot, and blinding. The stadium erupted, screams crashing over him in a tidal wave of sound.
But even as the adulation of the crowd swallowed him whole, his lips still tingled with her kiss and his heart was still in her hands. He glanced toward the wings where she stood, half-hidden in shadow, and winked.
Tani laughed, a soft, tremulous sound he couldn’t hear over the roar of the crowd, but one he felt like a pulse through his soul.
He grabbed the microphone, lifted it to his lips, and crooned, “Hello, Mumbai.”
The stadium exploded. Energy shot through him like lightning. Knowing she was there, watching him, gave him wings.
Kabir sang his heart out. He worked the stage, played to the audience, hyped his bandmates, letting the music blaze through his veins. But every few seconds his gaze drifted to the wings, to her, to the woman whose presence steadied him, electrified him, undid him.
It was impossible not to look. Impossible not to feel.
They finished a set and stepped off the stage to take a break. He took the bottle of water one of the aides handed him, draining it and grabbing another to pour over his head. He wrapped his arm around Tani and drew her close. Over her head, he saw Vik walking over to where they stood.
“That was fucking brilliant, man!” Vik hugged him, not caring about the sweat dripping off Kabir.
“Thanks.” Kabir grinned, his blood still pumping from the last set. “We’re nowhere close to done. The next time we should get the whole family here.”
He saw a shadow cross Tani’s eyes but before he could ask about it, David called out to him. It was time for them to go back on.
“Catch you guys when this is done,” he said, jogging out onto the stage with his bandmates. He caught one last glimpse of them before some of the light technicians swept on to the stage to tinker with something. And then they were performing again.
He was halfway through his next song when he glanced over. She wasn’t where she’d been all night but Vik stood there, waving to him and he relaxed. Shoving everything else from his mind, he concentrated on the one thing that came naturally to him. Music.
The next set was even better than the last one with the audience singing themselves hoarse along with him. The mood was electric and Kabir could almost taste the magic in the air. Tonight was the night dreams came true.
When they finally wrapped up, he glanced over instinctively to where she stood. A jolt of surprise ran through him at the sight of his parents standing in that spot instead. Ignoring the shouts for an encore, he ran off the stage heading straight for them.
“Is everything okay?” he asked, his gaze roving over their tense faces. Vikram stood a little distance away, clearly giving them space to talk.
“Of course,” Ved said. “We just wanted to see you and to talk.”
“Let’s go,” he told them, realising the security was getting restless with them lingering in the open space. “We can talk in the dressing room.”
He took a step forward and then stopped. “Where’s Tani?”
“She left,” Vik said, his voice carefully level. “She said she’ll give you a call later tonight.”
Left? His step hitched at the word but he brushed the unease aside. She was probably tired after all the drama of the day. He’d call her as soon as he got to the dressing room. They started walking, the guards clearing a path for them where necessary.
“You were brilliant out there, Kabir,” Aayushi said, her voice warm with pride and joy.
“Thanks,” he grinned, though a strange disquiet swam through him. Something wasn’t right but he wasn’t going to bring it up now, in front of everyone. There was a time and place for everything.
The minute they reached the dressing room though, he asked his staff to stay outside, shut the door on them and turned to face his family.
“Alright,” he said quietly. “Hit me with it. What’s going on?”
“Tani left,” Ved said.
A quiet buzz started beneath his skin, a hum that warned of something more, something dangerous, something destructive.
“Left to where?” he asked, though a part of him already knew the answer.
“New York,” Ved replied quietly. “She’s catching the flight out tonight. She’d booked her tickets earlier today.”
The whole day…she’d planned to leave and she’d kept that from him. The whole fucking day. Okay, he thought, his hands going to scrub his damp, sweaty face. That wasn’t too bad. New York was home, his home too, and he was heading there in a few days.
“Okay,” he said out loud now. “Okay.”
“You guys both need a little time to think things through,” Aayushi said gently. “It’s been a pretty intense time.”
Intense…yeah, that was one word for it. His heart tightened at the thought of Tani getting on a plane and flying halfway across the world from where he was. Fuck, this hurt.
“I’m going,” he said, the words spewing out of him automatically. “I’ll catch the same flight.”
“Kabir,” Aayushi sighed.
“She didn’t say goodbye.” Bewilderment flooded him. “I don’t get it. I thought we were sorting things out. I thought…” His mind fractured, unable to make sense of everything streaming through it. “I need to talk to her.”
A knock sounded on the door and Varsha stuck her head in, her face unexpectedly solemn after such a successful performance.
“Good,” he told her. “I’m glad you’re here. I need you to get me on the next available flight to New York. Preferably the one that leaves tonight.”
“Kabir,” she hesitated.
“What?” he asked, dread sinking his heart. “What the fuck now?”
“You can’t fly out, not to New York.” Varsha glanced over to where Ved stood, watching her with a frown.
“Why not?” Kabir’s demanded.
“Your aunt died.”
The words didn’t make sense. Nothing made sense anymore. Tani was gone. His aunt was dead. And now…what?
“I thought the doctors said she had time,” Aayushi asked, coming to stand beside Kabir, an arm going around his waist bracing him, steadying him.
“She did but,” Varsha hesitated, her gaze on Kabir’s white face. “She overdosed earlier tonight. Her body couldn’t take whatever she’d pumped into it. I’m sorry.”
There was a dull roaring in Kabir’s ears, one that seemed to drown out everything else. Dimly, he heard Ved ask, “Where’s the child?”
“She left for boarding school this morning,” Varsha answered. “She doesn’t know yet. Someone has to tell her.”
“I will.” Kabir’s lips felt numb, the words emerging from them with difficulty. “I’ll tell her.”
“We’ll come with you,” Ved told him.
Kabir nodded, unable to comprehend how everything had changed in the space of a few hours. “Tani-“
“She’ll understand,” Aayushi told him.
Maybe she would. Maybe she wouldn’t. Kabir couldn’t tell. What he could feel, deep in the bruised, battered chambers of his heart, was the unbearable truth that somehow, impossibly, he was back in this same place again.
Once again, he wasn’t choosing the woman he loved. Once again, he was letting her slip through his fingers, walking away from her while pretending it was for her own good, pretending he could survive the cost of losing her.
Once again, he was watching her leave instead of fighting for her.