Chapter 30
James
Itap my finger against the wood of my desk and stare at Sadie’s empty seat, then push up and head to the kitchen, pressing the button on the coffeemaker as I drum my hand on the countertop.
I’ve been in meetings all morning squaring everything off with Jo and Priya.
According to Cath, Sadie disappeared with her sandwich around midday.
That was three hours ago. She’s never out for this long.
I’ve called her twice and sent numerous texts.
The last one I sent five minutes ago said:
Where are you?
Cradling my mug, I pace across to her desk, gazing down at her chair.
I rub my hand over her soft cardigan hanging on the back.
I like her huge figure-swamping cardigans; they’re very Sadie.
Moving her mouse wakes up her machine, so I scan over the developer space she uses to write software—nothing out of the ordinary at all.
As I’m looking at her code, my phone vibrates in my hand. Thank God.
But when I look down, it’s a message from Jane asking if we can get together after work. Goddammit. So much for the terrible pain and being stuck in Brooklyn. And no, we can’t meet for a drink. I don’t even grace it with a reply as I stride back to my desk. Roy jerks his chin at me.
“Where’s Sadie, man?” he says.
“Not sure. She didn’t say anything to you or Cath did she, about … an appointment?”
Roy shakes his head.
When I sit back down, I stare at my computer screen.
Why isn’t she responding? She’s got her phone with her.
Unless … Unless … she went outside and …
Jake? Christ, did she go out and … I leap to my feet.
Shit, why didn’t I think of that? I’m an idiot.
I knew he was a danger. God, I’ve been sitting here wasting time. I trot through the desks toward Cath.
“Cath, I’m concerned about Sadie. She went out to lunch a couple of hours ago and hasn’t come back.”
“Not come back?” She glances over at Sadie’s desk.
“No. She didn’t say anything to you, did she?”
“No.”
“I’m going to go and search for her and check if she’s okay. Hold the fort for me while I’m gone, yeah?”
“Of course, James. Whatever you need.”
My phone buzzes in my hand with another message:
Drinks?
Jane again! Christ. I turn off my screen, grab my backpack, and head out onto Water Street, gut bubbling.
Why didn’t I think of this? Where would Jake go if he’d somehow managed to …
Fuck, I don’t even want to think about it.
I trot down the sidewalk toward the waterfront.
This is probably a waste of time, but she usually takes her lunch to the park.
However, when I get there, there’s no sign of her.
I curse myself fifty times over. I could have come out sooner.
I’m wasting time here. I stand in the incongruous afternoon sunshine, breathing heavily, and fire off another message:
Please text me back. I’m worried about you.
If it was Jake, where would he take her? I don’t know any of Jake’s hangouts except her mom’s apartment. Did he blackmail her to go up there by using her mom? When I’m at the corner, I hesitate, and my phone rings suddenly in my hand.
Thank God.
But a head of brown hair flashes across my screen. Jane again! What the fuck? Of all the times … but maybe there’s some problem.
“Hey, Jane.”
“James,” her voice is a rough croak. She sounds agonized.
“What’s up? Are you okay?” Who knew ex-girlfriends could turn into such a pile of trouble, but perhaps that’s just Jane.
“It’s important I meet you for a drink after work today.”
Important? “Are you downtown?”
“Yes. I had to come into the office. They sent a cab for me.”
So much for needing me to look after her. “I can’t do it. There’s …”
“I want to apologize to you,” she rushes on. “I had no idea that …” She trails off.
I stop walking. “No idea about what?”
“I can’t explain over the phone. Can we meet up?”
“I can’t. I’m just on my way out to find Sadie.” Now why did I tell her that?
“Sadie! Every time I talk to you, it’s Sadie this and Sadie that. She’s your fucking employee, James! She’s the one who told me.”
Jane talked to Sadie? “Told you what?”
“That you tried to jump off the roof of our building!”
My heart somersaults in my chest. What? I bend over my knees and try to suck in a breath, but it just makes me lightheaded.
“James, are you there?” Jane says in my ear.
My body is hot like I’m being boiled in oil. Sadie wouldn’t tell Jane any such thing. Sadie knew how mortified I was. She’s not the kind of person to tell a soul, least of all Jane. I don’t feel that way about Jane now. I’m not that person anymore.
“I’m so sorry, James. I had no idea that you …”
Maybe Jane found out another way—our doorman could have mentioned something. My eyes narrow. “When did you talk to Sadie?” I say, talking over her.
“What?”
“When did you see Sadie and have this conversation, Jane?”
“Well … around midday, I guess.” The insistent tone in her voice peters out into something much more reluctant.
Today? What the fuck? “How come?”
“What do you mean, how come?”
“How come you saw Sadie at lunchtime? Did you arrange to meet her or …”
“Oh, I ran into her.”
Ran into her, my ass. “Were you hanging around outside the office?” Jesus, the entire universe has ambushed Sadie in the street at this point.
Silence. “Well, I …”
“You were waiting for her outside?”
“I was waiting for you. I wanted to talk to you.”
Yeah, sure. “What did you say to her?”
“She came out of the doors and I said hello and how worried I was about you, and she said she was, too, ever since you’d tried to jump off the roof of our building!”
Hmm. Sounds like bullshit to me. But I’m wasting time here; Jane’s probably never given me a straight answer in her life. Who knows what’s truth and what’s lies with her, anymore?
But maybe she said something to Sadie about her degree.
My heart clenches. God, she’s a troublemaker.
And if Sadie thinks I know about that … fucking hell.
She loves her job; I can only begin to imagine her panic.
Well ... she’ll have gone to her mom’s, no question.
I turn toward Fulton Street station. I have no idea how Jane found out I was on the roof of our building, but this whole mess will only be fixed if I find Sadie and tell her I don’t give a shit whether she has a degree or not.
“Jane, I’m just going into the subway. I’ll call you another time,” I say, and I hang up on her.